When Worlds Collide
by Spartan of Chaos
Summary: What would TDI be like if there had been 60 campers instead of 22. Well if the new producer has anything to say about it, we are about to find out. Crossover including South Park, Rick and Morty, Ed Edd n Eddy, etc. Story originally by max3833.
1. Chapter 1

_**Disclaimer: The author does not own anything that will be used on this story other than the challenges that I will come up. Andrew is owned by max3833.**_

* * *

"YO!"

A man who appears to be in his twenties pops up in front of the camera. He is currently standing on a dock near a calm lake looking directly into the camera lens. The man then begins to speak to the viewer.

"Were coming at you live from Camp Wawanakwa, somewhere in Muskoka, Canada" says the man. He then continues, "I'm your host Chris Mclean, dropping season one of the hottest new reality show on television, right now."

Chris McLean, as the host is apparently called, begins to walk down the dock to a sign while continuing to address the camera. "Here's the deal," Chris remarks while walking, "Originally we had 22 campers sign up to spend eight weeks in this crummy old summer camp. But then", Chris says while a small scowl develops on his face, "The old producers got bought out by some stupid, American billionaire, so at first we thought the show would be a bust."

"Luckily," Chris declares while regaining his smile, "the guy turns out to have some great ideas. Including increasing the size of the campers from 22 to 60 vic-um I mean competitors, from all across both Canada and the U.S."

"While they're here", Chris says as though he is returning to a script, "They'll compete in challenges against each other, then have to face the judgment of their fellow campers. Every three days, one team will either win a reward or watch one of their team member's walk down the Dock of Shame, take a ride on the Boat of Loser's, and leave Total Drama Island, for good."

In a flash, Chris takes us to a bonfire pit where he reveals the inner workings of the vote off. "Each week all but one of the campers will receive a marshmallow." Chris stops to eat one. He then continues, "In the end, only one will be left standing and be rewarded with cheesy tabloid fame and a small fortune, which lets face it, they'll probably blow in a week."

" To survive, they'll have to survive flies, bears, disgusting camp food, and each other," Chris says with sadistic glee, " we will tape every moment, and so we will give them no privacy." The smile on his face increases noticeably, " Who will crumble under the pressure. Find out here, on Total Drama Island!"

* * *

(Cue Theme Song)

* * *

"Welcome back to Total Drama Island," says Chris who is again standing on the dock. He then prepares the viewer to meet the campers. "Alright," Chris remarks, " It's time to meet our campers." He slyly looks at the camera", we told them that they would be staying at this five-star resort, so if the seem a little Ticked off, that's probably why."

A giant yacht appears next to the dock as it unloads the camper it is carrying. The first camper off is a young brunette with a green blouse, braces, glasses and her hair in a ponytail. She runs over to Chris and says " Oh my gosh, it is so great to meet you."

"Alright, nice to see you Beth," Chris then turns to the camera and says, "Not exactly easy on the eyes, that one."

The next contestant to come to the cock is a tall African-Canadian. He is well built and much taller than either Beth or Chris. "DJ", Chris says greeting the young man in front of him.

"Yo Chris," Says DJ as he gives Chris a high five. He then looks around with a confused look, "Hey you sure this is the right place. Where's the hot tub at."

"Yo dog, this is it Camp Wawanakwa," Chris replies to the giant in front of him. As DJ walks to the other side of the dock near Beth he comments, "Man this place looked different on the application form."

While DJ had been questioning Chris, another contestant had already been let off. She had turquoise hair dye covering parts of her already black hair. She was also clad in a pure black skirt and shirt. Chris called out to the Goth, "Hey Gwen."

It was at that point that Gwen realized just where she was at. " You mean were staying here." "No," replied Chris, "you're staying here, I got a trailer with AC."

"I did not sign up for this."

"Actually," Chris said while holding up a large packet of papers, "you did."

Gwen after contemplating what Chris had just said, she grabbed the papers and tore them up. Chris didn't stop smiling, "The great thing about lawyers is," Chris suddenly pulled out another set of documents, "They make lots of copies."

"I'm not staying here," Gwen said only for her to realize that her boat had already left. She turned angrily to Chris, "jerk!" she shouted as she stormed over to DJ and Beth.

The next camper off the boat was a 10-year-old boy with spiky hair, yellow skin for some odd reason and wearing a red shirt, blue shorts and blue shoes.

"This is Bart Simpson from Springfield, state unknown."

"Oh yeah, I'm here to kick some butt and win me alot of moolah!" says Bart as he walks up next to Sonic.

"Yeah, you keep telling yourself that." Chris says, "Ok, getting back to new campers, let's welcome Jude, Jen, Jonesy, Wyatt, Nikki and Caitlin," as Chris said this, six new campers got off a boat and lined up. Jude was a blonde with a blue skull cap and a skate board tucked under his arm. Jen was a brunette with a pale purple hoody. Jonesy was tanned and for some reason he had blue hair. Wyatt was an African-American with a guitar and dreadlocks. Nikki had had purple hair and many piercings across her face. Caitlin was blonde and she had the look of one of those preppy girls.

"Hey Chris!" Jude shouted at the host, "loved you when you hosted that ice skating show."

"Yes," exclaimed the narcissistic host, "I knew I made a killer impression. Wait a minute", Chris suddenly began to look at Jude more closely. Then it dawned on him, "dude, our voices sound exactly the same."

"Oh wow I hear it to," replied Jude. He then frowned, "Seems a bit lazy doesn't it."

"Well there are only so many voices in the world some of them are bound to be similar."

While this rather meaningless discussion took place, the next camper had arrived. The man was obviously of Asian decent, not only because of his own physical appearance, but also his outfit. The man wore a long kimono, sandals, and even possessed a sword that was strapped to his waist. When Chris noticed the man's arrival, he ran up to him.

"Yo," shouted Chris, "what's up." When the man did not respond, Chris simply told him in an annoyed voice, "Alright, go sit you're butt down."

"Hello everyone," the next camper off was a Caucasian with black hair. He wore a green shirt with black hand print on it. He also held a guitar. He smiled as he began walking towards the campers, only for the bags of the next camper to fall on his head, causing him to fall through the dock. The camper who had thrown said luggage was a physically imposing girl in a blue jumpsuit.

"Ok the music man was Trent and the muscle girl is Eva," Chris said as an explanation to the other campers. He then turned to Eva and the hole where Trent once stood, "What's in those bags, weights."

"Yes," Eva replied as she reached down and grabbed the bag from the water. After several seconds Trent also came up, but his concussion was so bad that he was forced to lie down without any conversation.

"Wahoo!"

A giant burly blond teenager had appeared as the next camper. On his t-shirt was a blue maple leaf. The tubby teenager ran over to Chris and gave him a giant bear hug.

"He-y Ow-en," coughed Chris, "Um, dude, do you think- you could let me down."

"Oops sorry." After letting the poor host breathe, Owen went over to the rest of the campers.

"Man, what a fatass."

The voice that came out next was from the next camper. She had black hair that went to the middle of her back and wore maroon tank top and gray shorts. "Ah, Heather, nice to see you bra," comments Chris as she passes by him.

"Whatever," said Heather full of disdain for both Chris and the other contestants.

"Ooo, I do believe I see our jock Tyler," as Chris said this, a boy with brown hair and a red track suit was coming towards the dock. But he wasn't on the boat, he was water skiing behind it. Just as Tyler waved at the group, he lost control of the skis and barreled into the side of the dock, adding more damage to the poor hunk of wood.

"And here we have our surfer chick, Bridgette," said Chris completely ignoring the obvious pain that had afflicted Tyler. Bridgette was a girl with lazy eyes and her blonde hair tied back in a ponytail. She did indeed posses a surfboard. As she stepped of the boat, she walked over to where the rest of the campers were standing.

"Hey guys," she said, "what's up."

"This ain't Malibu, Sweetheart," said someone from the next boat. The new camper was a punk, pure and simple. He had a green mohawk and piercings all over his face. The punk then turned to the rest of them. "Name's Duncan."

Duncan grabbed Chris by the shirt and told him, "I don't like surprises," obviously referencing the camp where he would spend the next few months.

"I know," replied Chris, "and here's another, I have your parole officer's cell phone number, and I can call him any time I want and can have you hauled back to juvie."

Duncan just snorted at the threat and walked over to the other campers. As this was occurring, three new competitors had come off their yacht. One was a fairly fat man who had brown hair, wore glasses, and had a white dress shirt. His two companions were far stranger than he was. One was a baby, who was dressed in a yellow shirt and red overalls and he had a football shaped head. The third member was perhaps the weirdest of all of them. That camper was in fact a pure white dog wearing a red collar. As all three got off many looked in wonder at the baby and dog.

"Alright," said Chris, completely unaffected by the sight before him, "let's welcome our next three campers, Peter, Stewie and Brian."

"Oh my god," Shouted Peter, the fat man, "It is such an honor to meet you Mr. Probst."

"Thanks- wait what," Chris gave Peter an incredulous look, "Dude, I'm Chris McLean, not Jeff Probst."

"Oh," Peter lost his excited attitude, "Now I'm disappointed."

As Peter, Brain and Stewie went to join the other campers, another camper had arrived. He to was strange, if for nothing other than his skin was yellow like Bart was. If I'm not being racist here, I mean his skin was actually yellow, think it had to do with something about working in a nuclear power plant for so long. Anyway when he got off his boat, he screamed happily as he jumped over the railing. When he did this, he hit a loose board that came up and smacked him in the face. When this comical scene happened, the man screamed, "Doh!" and fell over unconscious.

"Okay," said Chris stunned at the development, "that's Homer in case anyone here actually cares, and the horse head man about to come onto the dock is named Bojack" As if on cue, Bojack, with brown fur and a black mane, with a white streak on his snout that begins at his upper lip and ends underneath his eyes, with a white diamond shaped mark on his forehead. He also has a pink spot on his nose and pointy ears near his mane. Wearing an unbuttoned gray jacket with a blue sweater underneath, cyan jeans and red-and-white sneakers jumped on the deck.

"Hey," said Bojack before he realized what he landed on. He suddenly looked down and realized he was standing on top of Homer. "Um," Bojack said in a confused voice, "do I want to know what happened to him." All of the other campers silently shook their heads as Bojack and Peter dragged Homer out of the way.

The next camper off was another dog. He had pink fur and a dog collar that read, "Courage".

The next two campers were a teenage boy and girl. The girl had read hair and the boy had blonde hair. They were both dressed in black shirts.

"Yo, KP," Shouted Chris, "good to see you."

"Hey Chris," said Kim, "thanks for getting us on the show again."

"Well how could I say no. Especially after you and Ron saved that cargo of my world famous hair gel."

"Oh my god," said Bridgette as she ran up to Kim, "You're Kim Possible, the girl who can do anything." Bridgette was quickly joined by DJ and Bart.

"Always good to see some of my fans," Kim said as she hi-fived all three of them.

"Hey Stoppable," Duncan said as he came up to Ron, "Remember me."

"Oh yeah, your that Duncan kid who I stopped from escaping juu-, aw crud," Ron murmured as he was about to endure the beating of a life time.

Before said pummeling began, however, Chris interrupted them by introducing the next camper. He had well kept brown hair and he wore a collared shirt. Chris shouted at the boy, "How's it going Cody."

"Okay," he said, but before he could continue, another camper had already announced herself.

"Alright, Leshawna's in the house," said a large African-American girl. Leshawna, as the girl was called, was heavy set and had shirt with fruit on the front. As she walked down the dock, she began her attempt at psyching the remaining campers out. "Ya'll might as well give up," she said, "I came here to win!"

"Foolish earth scum!" a small, green camper on the next boat called out. This camper may be weirder than any of the other campers that had already arrived. Not only was his skin green, but he also lacked a nose and ears, and his eyes had a glassy look to them, as though they were fake. This camper began to shout in an overconfident manner. "You all will bow down to the almighty power that is ZIM!"

"Zim, dude, nice to meet you," Chris said with a forced smile, "Dude, I hope you realize we picked you completely based off your strange appearance."

"Um," Zim said in a fearful voice, "I am normal!"

"Yeah right," Gwen said with an annoyed look. She then turned to Kim, "There is no way he is a human, he looks like an alien."

"That's because he is!" shouted a boy from the next boat. He had an incredibly large head, and he wore a black cloak and glasses. He had a crazed look on his face as he shouted, "Zim is an alien, and he is trying to take over the world."

"Dib, dude," Chris exclaimed, running over to the large headed boy, "The reason we picked you is because every reality show needs an alien nerd, but don't falsely accuse your fellow campers."

"Hey!" Dib shouted at the host, "I'm a paranormal invest-"

"Kid, move it," Chris said in an annoyed tone, "Our next competitor, Courtney, has arrived."

A young woman with a dark tan and a gray sweater-vest walked off the boat. "Greetings everyone," she said. She walked over to Owen and shook his hand." I hope we will be able to have a great… Ooo, who is that," as she finished talking she pointed out to the next boat where the next camper stood. This camper was a young man with a golden tan and a body that appeared that it had been sculpted by some Greek artist. When he neared the dock, all the girls, and Owen, looked in awe at the apparent god that was in front of them.

"Yo Justin," greeted Chris, "What's up bro."

"Not much."

"Just so you know, we chose you completely based on your looks."

"I can live with that."

"EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEH"

A horrific screech was heard from the next boat. But instead of some poor soul, writhing in pain, it was two girls hugging each other a squealing in girlish joy. They both had black and white shirts and pink shorts. One was skinny and of African decent, the other was large and Caucasian. "Ok everyone," said Chris, "Meet the wonder twins, Sadie and Katie."

"It's great to be here Chris," they said in unison, and then they both skipped to the edge of the dock."

As the next campers got off, Chris noticed something odd about the tallest member. While the smaller ones were a boy and a girl, with a big nose and blonde hair respectively, the tall one was dressed in a black cloak. "Yo dude," Chris said to the tall camper, take off that cloak and show us your face." As the man did so, all of the campers were shocked. The man's head was a skull, in fact; his entire body was nothing but bones.

"Oh, now I know why your name is Grim," said Chris.

As Grim, Billy and Mandy sat down; the next camper was a tall lanky boy with orange hair and glasses. As he wheezed, he looked up at the camp and said, "So instead of performing on a stage, we'll be competing in some crappy old camp."

"Yeah," Chris said as he look a little surprised at Owen, "That about sums it up."

"Awesome," Harold, the nerd, said as he pumped a fist, "that is much more tailor made for my mad skills."

"What skills," deadpanned Mandy as Billy, Grim, Peter, Heather, and Owen laughed at the poor nerd.

"And here is our next competitor, Noah," Chris exclaimed pointing at a well tanned egg head in a sweater-vest. Noah gave an impassive look at the current campers, and then turned to Chris.

"You got that list of my life threatening allergies right."

"Yeah, I'm sure someone did."

"Thanks," Noah replied sarcastically. The brainiac then walked over to Duncan, "Hey, nice piercings, you do them yourself."

"Yeah," Duncan replied just as he grabbed Noah's lip and a needle, "you want one."

"Um, no thanks, can I have my lip back," Duncan let go, "thanks."

"Ezekiel," Chris greeted the next camper after the near violent exchange, "what's up dude."

Ezekiel, who wore a green hoody and blue torque, looked up in the sky. "I think I see a bird, eh," he said to the shock of everyone except the man in samurai garb, who also looked up.

"Yes, I see one too," said the man.

"Finally you talk," said Chris in an exasperated manner, "Sheesh, you were really annoying me with that silent treatment. Oh and Ezekiel, I know you don't get out much. You were homeschooled by freaky prairie people, so just keep your mouth shut and try not to get eliminated on the first day.

The next boat let off four nine year olds. One was very fat, and he wore a red sweater. The next was completely covered in a large, torn-up, orange Parka. The third had a weird, green ushanka. The fourth member was apparently the most normal; he only had a blue skull cap.

"Alright everyone," Said Chris, "please welcome Cartman, Kenny, Kyle and Stan."

"Shut up you stupid, faggot." said Cartman, the fat one, in a shrill voice. He then turned to the rest of the campers. He said, "You ready to lose, you dumb fuckers."

"Okay, I may be home-schooled," said Ezekiel, "but I know that guys his age shouldn't know that word."

"Please forgive him," said Kyle, "Cartman's just a fucking idiot."

"Shut up you fucking Jew."

"Shut the fuck up Cartman!"

"Listen dudes," said Stan. He seemed to be a voice of reason, "We can argue later, let's just try not to piss off the other campers."

"Oh high," said the next camper. She was very attractive and she wore cowboy boots and a blue bandana. Probably the most obvious feature of her appearance was her well proportioned chest. This caused many of the guys to stare.

"Hey Lindsey," said Chris, "how's it going."

"Great Chip," replied Lindsey.

"My name's Chris."

"Oops, sorry." Lindsey took this opportunity to walk over towards the other campers.

"Yee haw!"

This shout had come from a girl in green clothing who was jumping off her boat. As she did so, she hit her chin on the dock and fell in. The others began to laugh until Courtney ran up to where she had fallen. "Are you ok?"

"Wow what a wipe out huh," said the crazed girl, "I mean, that was nearly as bad as when I challenged that Grizzly Bear to a wrestling match, man I was in the hospital for weeks. Still, there is now a nice bear skin rug on my living room floor now. Well thanks for helping me up- hey is that a samurai. Cool! Hi! My name's Izzy!"

As Izzy, as the red headed girl was called, skipped over to the samurai, the next campers got off their boat. The first was short and had three hairs sticking up wearing a yellow and purple shirt with a red stripe on it. The next was tall and had a green jacket on. This camper smelled incredibly bad, but he was apparently strong as he carried three large duffel bags. The third member wore a sock hat and an orange shirt and purple shorts. While his arms were scrawny, he was still some how able to lift and carry a refrigerator.

"Remind me Eddy," said the sock headed boy in a strained voice, "Why do we need a refrigerator."

"Well sock-head," Eddy, the short one said, "you're the one who said we needed to be prepared.'

"Yes," replied Double D, "but if I am the weakest of us, why do I have to carry the refrigerator."

"Because I don't lift," said Eddy with a scowl, "and you said you don't want to touch Ed's bag so you got the fridge."

"Butter toast!" exclaimed Ed, the tall smelly boy.

As D.J. and Peter helped Double D set the fridge down Another group of three arrived. The first member looked the most normal. He had red hair and wore a white shirt under a red jacket and blue jeans. The second was a woman who had purple hair, wore a white tank top with black pants, and perhaps the strangest thing about her was that she had only one eye. The third member was the strangest of them all. He was in fact a robot with a cylinder body and an antenna on his head.

"Our next contestants are two people and an advanced robot who fell through a time warp from the 30th century," Chris introduced, "I give you Fry, Leela, and Bender!"

"Yo, meatbags of the stupid ages," Bender greeted, "Bender's in the house!"

"Wow," Harold breathed, "a robot with human intelligence and mannerisms! Wicked!"

"Considering what most humans are like, I'm not impressed," Gwen snorted.

Bender scowled at her, "Hey, bite my shiny metal ass!"

As those three joined the other campers, the next group had arrived. They were probably the strangest out of the all of the campers that had arrived previously. They consisted of living fast food items. One was a giant milkshake cup with purple bendy straw and yellow hands; the next one was a living box of French fries with his box having eyes, a mouth, and a goatee, the last one was pretty much a giant ball of meat with eyes and a mouth with only one tooth. The other campers just stood looking dumbfounded at the living fast food.

Oh yeah, here's the food trio, consisting of Master Shake, Frylock and Meatwad!

"Nah boy, that wasn't our name, our name was-" Meatwad began but was cut off by Frylock.

"Meatwad, we don't go by that anymore, remember?"

"Well I came up with the golden name, I still remember it too! Aqua Teen Hu-" said Shake before Chris interrupted him.

"Okay move along, we still got five more contestants left to introduce."

Shake glared at Chris and flipped him off as he and the others joined everybody else.

The next two that got off weren't even human. They were in fact two octopuses. One was green and wore a red and white trucker hat that had the words "Booty Hunter" on it and the second octopus was a lighter shade of green and had red hair and freckles for no apparent reason.

"Okay then, also competing are Early and-" Chris was cut off again as a shotgun was pointed to his face.

"Hey boy, I was promised some chewin' tobacco! Gimme it!" Early shouted.

"Daddy, quit all of that bullshit, I gave you some earlier!" said Rusty.

"You'll find things are even better Early. Trust me," Chris said frantically as he didn't want to get shot.

"I got my eye on you boy," Early warned as he and Rusty slithered away.

After that rather terrifying experience, the next two contestants did not arrive by boat but instead emerged out of swirling green portal much to the bewilderment of everyone else. They were a tall lanky old man and a young teenage boy. The old man had long legs and arms and is very skinny. He had a dimly tanned ashy complexion and grey-blue hair with a bald spot on the back of his head. He had spiky hair on his head and a unibrow. He wore a white lab coat with a light blue green shirt underneath. He also wore brown pants, a dark brown belt with a yellow buckle, and black shoes. The boy had short brown hair that he wears straight and neatly combed around his head. He wore a yellow shirt, blue pants, and white shoes.

"OK people," Chris said now feeling relieved "Here's our next two contestants, Rick and Morty!"

"H-Holy crap, Rick! I only have four fingers! W-Where...Where the hell did my fifth one go?! Di-id it get cut off in the portal?!"

"Well Morty, if you didn't bitch about wanting to see this universe, you'd still have fi-*belch*-ve fingers, Morty."

"I-I dunno if I wanna be here anymore, Rick! Having only four fingers it's...it's weird! It's really weird!"

"You wanna see weird, Morty? You should see this universe's fa-*belch*-ndom. There's some sick people who watch this series, Morty."

"Alright, ignoring that." he said, "We just have to wait for our final camper. Man he is late; Geoff was supposed to be one of the first here."

Just as Chris said this, loud music blared in the distance. A young teenager with a cowboy hat and pink, unbuttoned vest was seen dancing on top of the boat. As he reached the dock, he jumped off the rail and on to it.

"Chris Mclean," said Geoff, "It's an honor to meet you man."

"Geoff, how's it going man?"

"Going great man."

"If they say man one more time," Gwen said in a disgusted tone, "I will puke."

"Oh yeah Chris," Geoff said as though he was remembering something important, "the driver said he had something important to tell you."

"Oh really, what."

"That, that stupid American comment is coming out of your pay check."

The voice inside the boat revealed a young man in his twenties with brown hair and a red, collared shirt. When Chris saw him, the campers noticed that Chris looked like he wanted to wet his pants.

"Mr. Laurence," Chris said through a forced smile, "always nice to have the producer out to see the show in progress."

"Yeah, I'm going to stay here as often as possible in a trailer to make sure the show goes correctly, as well as to keep your sadistic tendencies under control."

"Oh joy. Okay, now I'm going to ask all of the contestants to get ready for a promo picture," Chris said as he jumped on the boat with a camera.

The campers walked over to the side of the dock that was closest to Chris. They all struck a pose, and then stared at the camera.

"Alright," said Chris, "say Wawanakwa."

"Wawanakwa- ahhh!"

As Chris took the picture, the old dock had collapsed under the weight of the fifty campers. As they climbed out of the water, Chris again addressed them. "Okay, guys," he said, "Dry off and meet in the campfire pit in-whoa."

When Chris was not looking, Rick had come up behind him and pushed him in as well as the producer continued. "What Chris was trying to explain was that you should go there in ten minutes," Andrew explained, "see you there."

* * *

As the now dry campers were sitting near the campfire, Andrew and a now dry Chris arrived. Chris still appeared to be ticked off at the producer, but he seemed to put it away long enough to explain the game to the campers.

"This," Chris explained, "Is Camp Wawanakwa, your home for the next eighteen weeks. The campers sitting around you will be your cabin-mates, your competition, and maybe even your friends." As Chris said this, several things happened in unison.

Duncan threatened Harold with a fist.

Bart was making fun of Homer who began an attempt to strangle his son.

And Owen farted, which caused Trent, who was standing behind him, to fall unconscious.

"The camper who manages to last the longest, with out getting voted off, will win one hundred thousand dollars," Chris exclaimed. As he said this, money signs appeared in Eddy's eyes as he began to imagine what he could buy.

"Now about sleeping arrangements," Chris said following up on his previous statement, "You will put into two teams, with two separate cabins, with girls on one side, and boys on the other."

Katie then spoke up, "I have to live with Sadie, or I'll die."

Then Sadie followed with, "And I will break out in hives, it's true."

Gwen looked away from the twins, "this cannot be happening."

Owen then grabbed both her and Tyler. "Come on guys," he said, "it'll be like a big sleep over."

Tyler then added his own two cents, "at least you won't have to sleep next to him," he said gesturing towards Duncan, who at that moment happened to be giving a deer a noogie.

"Here's the deal," said Chris as he got out a sheet of paper, "when I call your name go stand over there, you will be forming the first team."

He began to list the names of the first team. "Gwen, Trent, Heather, Cody, Lindsey, Bart, Fry, Leela, Nikki, Jonesy, Caitlin, Brian, Stewie, Master Shake, Frylock, Meatwad, Zim, Beth, Katie, Cartman, Owen, Kenny, Billy, Mandy, Bojack, Early, Rusty, Leshawna, Justin, and Noah," Chris then grabbed a large roll of cloth, "from this moment on, you are officially known as," The linen unraveled, revealing a gopher, "the Screaming Gophers."

"Yeah," shouted Owen, "I'm a gopher."

"Wait a minute," asked Katie, "What about Sadie?"

"The rest of you over here," said Chris who completely ignored the question, "Geoff, Kim, Ron, D.J., Bridgette, Tyler, Courage, Sadie, Izzy, Grim, Courtney, Ezekiel, Peter, Homer, Bender, Ed, Edd, Eddy, Jude, Jen, Wyatt, Duncan, Eva, Stan, Kyle, Rick, Morty, Dib, Harold, and Jack," then Chris gave a confused look at the paper, "wait a minute, who the heck is Jack?" His question was answered when the Samurai walked over with the rest of the team. Chris then scowled, "What kind of name is Jack for a samurai? anyway; you guys are known as the Killer Bass."

"But Katie is a gopher!" exclaimed Sadie.

"Alright campers," said Chris despite the interruption, "you will be filmed in all public areas in the camp."

* * *

(Confession Cam: where your thoughts are shared, and our money is wasted)

Chris: You will also be able to share your inner most thoughts on tape with video diaries. Let the audience at home know what you're really thinking, or just get something off your chest.

Gwen: Okay … so far this sucks.

Grim: (In Jamaican accent) Okay, I know what ya thinking, "How the heck did the Grim Reaper get stuck with two kids"? Well I made a bet with them, and now I'm their friend forever. But, we made a deal, if I beat them, I regain ma freedom. Hahahaha!

Lindsey: (facing the toilet, back to the camera) I don't get it, where's the camera guy?

Loon: (It's putting on lipstick before it notices the camera)

Double D: Well this will sure be an invigorating experience.

Eddy: Aw yeah! One hundred grand, here I come!"

Dib: Surely some people believe me about Zim being an alien, (he pauses as he looks at the camera) right!

Owen: Hey everyone, check this out, I have something very important to say. (He then farts and laughs).

* * *

Chris then turned to the campers. "Okay," he said, "Let's find your cabins." The campers then followed Chris for a short distance, and then they saw tow medium sized cabins. "Gophers, you're in the east cabin, while the Bass are in the west cabin."

* * *

(Screaming Gophers)

The Gopher girls walked into their cabin to be greeted with a grim reminder of their past experience at summer camps.

Bunk beds.

"This cannot be happening," whined Heather as she stood in the cabin entrance. She was quickly pushed aside by a ticked off Gwen.

"Stop griping about it," said Gwen as she set up her bunk.

"Shut up weird goth girl."

"Hey," Gwen looked up to see the computer geek, Cody, staring at her, "How is i-,"

"Ahh! Pervert in the room," before Cody could finish his sentence, Leela had run up to him, grabbed him by the collar and sent him flying out the door.

As Chris walked by the unconscious geek, Lindsey asked him a very important question, "where are the outlets, I have to plug in my straitening iron."

"There are probably some in the communal bathrooms."

"Oh, what's that?"

"It means we bathe together," said Gwen who had just come out form the room. She then muttered, "Idiot."

Lindsey began to grow tears in her eyes. "Aw come on, that's unfair."

The Gopher boys then snuck their heads out of the door to see what was going on.

"I'm glad were in our own cabin, just us guys," Owen said before the guys gave him a look of disgust. Owen then realized what he had said. "I mean no, I didn't mean that," Noah and the now conscious Trent retreated inside the cabin, "I love chicks."

* * *

(Killer Bass)

"Excuse me, Chris," Chris then turned away from Owens's attempt to prove he was not gay to see Geoff on the cabin deck, "will there be any chaperone's while were here."

"Most of you are all sixteen years old, the same age as a counselor in training at a normal summer camp, so, other than my self, the older competitors, the producer and the cook, you will have no adult supervision, but before you do something stupid, remember you are setting an example for the younger campers. Alright, you all have one hour to unpack before you meet in the mess hall."

"Nice," Geoff commented on the lack of supervision. He then went inside the cabin to see the scrawny Ed boy attaching the fridge to a generator. "Most excellent Double D dude," Geoff said as Double D finished the wiring, "now all we need is some grub and some soda and we will be set." Geoff then turned to Grim. "So you ready for the party of your life dude?"

"Hmm, let's see," said Grim sarcastically, "for one, I'm dead! Number two, I don't like parties, they remind me of high school."

"Please tell me that at least one of you realizes that Zim is an alien," interjected Dib.

"Dude," said Geoff with a frown, "even if he does look weird, that doesn't make him an alien."

Dib just looked in shock at the teenager in the cowboy hat.

* * *

"LISTEN UP!"

A very tall and muscular African-American in a chef's outfit was standing behind a counter. In his arms he held a pot of a suspicious substance. He then began to speak again. "I serve it three times a day, and you will eat it three times a day," he shouted, "grab a tray, get your food, and sit your buts down now!"

"Have a cow," muttered Owen as Bart snickered.

"What's that," screamed Chef, "come closer fat boy, I didn't hear you."

"Um, I really didn't say anything important."

"I'm sure you didn't."

As the campers moved up the line, many were disgusted by the Sloppy Joes Chef was serving. Stan looked at horror at what he was supposed to eat, and then asked Kyle, "Dude, aren't black chefs with the name Chef supposed to be good cooks?"

"I think it's only the nice ones," replied Kyle as they sat down.

When all of the campers had sat down, they began to try to eat their food. When Cartman stabbed his Sloppy Joe with his fork however, the disgusting paste jumped up on his face and began to attack him. "Ahhh! Get this fucking thing off my face!" he screamed. Eventually, after about five minutes of pure shock and disgust, Duncan pulled a leg off a chair and wacked the monster until it let go of Cartman's face.

Chris walked into the mess hall completely ignorant of the chaos that had just taken place. "So," he asked, "how's lunch."

"Yo, my man," said Geoff rather uncomfortably, "could we order a pizza or something." Just as he finished that sentence however, a cleaver went right over his head and nearly took off his hat. "Whoa!" Geoff exclaimed as he turned to Chef, who now wielded a butcher knife, "it's cool, brown slop is cool! Right guys." Everyone in the cafeteria quickly nodded their heads in fear.

"Alright, eat up, because your challenge begins in," Chris held up one finger," in one hour."

"What do you think they will make us do," asked Katie fearfully.

"It's our first challenge," DJ said reassuringly, "how hard can it be?"

* * *

One hour later, the campers were standing on top of a cliff, in their bathing suits. D.J. probably expressed the feeling that each one of the campers was enduring the best. "Oh shit."

* * *

 _ **AN:** **So, this story is back up again. Considering how much potential it had I felt it was a waste to let it just fade into obscurity. So this my way of honoring max3833's legacy since his account has long since been inactive. The obvious changes I made is increasing the amount of competitors to sixty and replacing characters who I didn't think fit in this kind of story. To anyone who has followed this story in the past, I hope you'll enjoy what I have in store for this story now that it's returned. To those who are tuning in to this story for the first time** **, I chose to do this because I thought they're was insufficient representation for crossovers in this category. Second, this allows me to change the votes so I can change how the original characters will be voted off. I also would like to point out how different the lives have already been changed. Trent hasn't talked with anyone, Geoff and Bridgette have not officially met, and the new producer has begun a feud with Chris. How these changes will affect their lives, only I know, but I will warn you that their will be changes in the pairings. So I hope you enjoyed this first chapter And I hope to update soon. Please review.**_


	2. Chapter 2

Chris: last time on Total Drama Island, the campers arrived, giving us some already pretty funny moments. Eva crushed Trent under her bags, Peter mistook yours truly for Jeff Probst, and an innocent host got pushed into the lake by an evil scientist. Any way, now the campers are about to meet their first challenge, DIVING OFF A CLIFF! Awesome!

Who will jump?

Who will be the first voted off?

Will I ever get back at the producer?

Find out right now on Total Drama Island!

(Cue theme song)

"Your challenge is three fold," Chris said to the campers as they stood on the cliff, "your first task is to jump off this one thousand foot high cliff, into the lake."

"Piece of cake," commented Bridgette not taking time to notice D.J. who was scared out of his wits."

"If you look down," Chris continued past the interruption, "you will see two target areas. The wider area represents the part of the lake we filled with psychotic, man-sharks." As if to prove a point, a shark took that opportunity to jump out of the lake. "Inside that area is a safe zone," Chris continued, "That's your target, and were pretty sure that area is shark free."

"Excuse me," Leshawna said with more than a little fear.

"For each member of your team that jumps," continued Chris without acknowledging Leshawna, "there will be a crate of supplies waiting below. In each crate are supplies that you will need to complete the second part of the challenge, building a hot tub. The team with the best one gets to have a hot tub party tonight. The losers send someone home."

"And that's not all," announced Andrew as he walked up next to Chris, "I have also decided to include in each challenge, an MVC award."

"MVC?" questioned Morty.

"Most valuable camper," said Andrew, "It goes to the camper I determine who had the best effect on the winning team. It includes a trophy and a five thousand cash bonus at the end of the game." Many campers perked up at the thought of a reward for their hard work during a challenge. Chris then scowled at the producer before he turned to the campers with his signature fake smile.

"Alright Killer Bass, you're up first."

"Oh, wow," Bridgette had a look of pure terror on her face as she looked over the side, "So, who's up first." Crickets chirped.

"Don't sweat it guys," said Owen in a rather reassuring way, "I heard that these shows always make the interns do the stunts first to make sure it's survivable."

* * *

 _(Two hours earlier)_

"We have to test the stunts," Chris said to Chef who was wearing a bathing suit, "you know that."

"Do I look like an intern to you?"

"No, but the ones we had are all in the hospital. Come on jump you big Chicken. Bok-bok!"

Chef then put on his goggles and said, "They don't pay me enough for this job." Chef then made the perilous jump into the lake. He landed safely enough, but he missed the safe zone, before he knew it he was being chased by the sharks until he reached shore.

"Well," commented Chris as he scratched something off on his clipboard, "that seems safe enough."

* * *

 _(Present)_

"So, who's up," Eva said with disdain for her teammates.

"Ladies first," interjected Duncan while he was staring at Courtney in her bathing suit.

"Fine," said Bridgette, "I'll go first, it's no big deal, just a thousand foot high dive into a circle of angry sharks." As Bridgette finished saying this, she herself jumped off into the lake. She managed to perform a perfect swan dive into the safe zone, impressing everyone.

"Not bad," commented Kim, more than impressed with her fan.

"That was awesome," said D.J. as he marveled at her courage.

"Alright! I'm next!" shouted Tyler as he made his jump, attempting the dive in the same way Bridgette had. While he too, hit the safe zone everyone winced when he hit the buoy on the side of it.

"Wahoo!" shouted Geoff as he dived waving his hat in the air.

"Look out below," said Eva as she fell.

Duncan just fell silently.

"AHHHH!" screamed Stan and Kyle when they themselves fell.

Jude, Jen and Wyatt all jumped with cries of excitement as they fell.

"Aw man that's scary," said D.J. with fear, "I don't know if I can do it."

"Scared of heights?" asked Chris, "If you want, you can give up, but your teammates will hate you."

"Ha! What a big chicken," laughed Peter as he skipped with Homer off the cliff. This however, angered D.J. How dare Peter laugh at his fears! Had Peter ever had to deal with and atomic wedgie caused by a diving board!

"I'll show you!" D.J screamed as he jumped. D.J. quickly realized his mistake, as he began to hyperventilate.

"You idiots," screamed Bridgette at Peter and Homer, "If D.J. hits the water like that, he'll drown."

"Well it's his fault for being a baby," said Peter. Bridgette responded to this by punching said idiot in the jaw. Just as all appeared lost for poor D.J., a blue and red streak appeared. Before anyone had realized it, a web shoot out in between the buoys, and it caught D.J. before he hit the water.

"Wow!" shouted D.J., "Thanks Spiderman!"

"Everybody gets one," said Spiderman before he turned to Peter, "tell him Peter."

"Yeah, apparently everybody gets one."

"Bingo," said Spiderman before he web-slingged into the sunset.

"We'll," said an astonished Chris, "that was awesome! Unfortunately, D.J. didn't hit the water, so he doesn't count."

"What!" shouted the entire Killer Bass team at the evil host.

"Wahoo," shouted Ezekiel as he also jumped from the cliff, only to hit the side of it and go spinning into the lake. Luckily for the bass, he hit the safe zone and they got another point.

"OH YEAH!" Rick screamed in excitement as he jumped into the lake.

Ed was the next to jump, and when he landed, the sharks immediately attempted to get out of the water. Apparently Ed smelled so bad that sharks couldn't stand being in the same lake as him.

While the sharks were recovering, Eddy took the opportunity to jump and safely make his way to the boat.

Jack silently dived into the lake, without any problems. You can kind tell that ticked off a sadistic host.

"I can't jump without Katie," said Sadie pathetically.

"But she's on a different team."

"I'll switch teams with her," said Izzy who was looking annoyed by the twins.

"Alright, you're both on the Killer Bass now," said Chris in an angry tone. The two then jumped safely into the lake.

As expected, Kim made a perfect dive, and Ron's only trouble was that he nearly hit the cliff.

"AHHH!" screamed Double D as he fell, barely making inside the safe zone.

Morty screamed in terror as well, but was able to make it into the safe zone without any problems.

After Grim and Bender had also dived, Harold was up next. "Yes," called Harold, as he dived. Unfortunately, when Harold hit the water, he did a split, thus causing a lot of damage to his nether regions. His screams even caused the sharks to wince in pain.

"Oh, hate to see that happen," said Chris with a completely sadistic smile on his face.

Dib dived without any problems leaving only Courage and Courtney. When it became obvious that it was his turn, Courage began to tremble in fear. When he heard the cheering from Bridgette, D.J., and the others however, he bucked up turned to the camera, and said, "The things I do for love." Courage then proceeded to jump into the lake, hitting the safe zone. When he reached the others, the group all began to hug him and give him praise, something he wasn't really used to.

"Excuse me Chris," said Courtney, "I have a medical condition."

"What condition."

"A condition that prevents me from jumping off cliffs," said Courtney while rolling her eyes.

"You can chicken out if you want," said Chris slyly, "but it might end up costing your team the win, and then they'll hate you."

"It's a calculated risk, I have seen the other team, and I don't think twenty eight of them will jump." The entire gopher team looked ticked off at that statement.

"Alright," Chris passed her a chicken hat, as she went down the escalator to be with her team.

"Okay," said Chris as he tallied up the score," that's twenty-eight jumpers, one chicken and one disqualification. Gophers, you're up, and if you can beat that, will give you carts to help you move the crates."

"Nice," commented Fry, "Okay, who's up first?"

"I'm sorry," said Heather, "there is no way I am doing this, I'll get my hair wet."

"Oh yes you are!" exclaimed Leshawna as she lifted Heather over her head and threw her off the cliff.

"Leshawna," Heather shouted from the lake, "You jerk. I am so going to get you back for that."

"Hey!" shouted Leshawna, "I through you into the safe zone didn't I. Now I just hope I can make it to." She then jumped and landed next to Heather.

"I thought this was going to be a talent competition," remarked a frightened Lindsey.

"Yeah," said Chris with a fake laugh, "No.

Lindsey screamed as she fell from the cliff.

Gwen shouted, "I hate this show!" as she fell.

Cody flapped around like a fish out of water as he dived.

Mandy, like Duncan, came down the cliff silently, arms crossed.

When Billy came down, he bounced off a buoy using his nose, thus avoiding a painful face to face with the large metal flotation device.

Like their friends on the Bass, Nikki, Jonesy, and Caitlin fell to the water without any trouble.

Leela dived in with no problems, Fry on the other hand wasn't so lucky as he hit the buoy on the way down.

Early and Rusty were able to dive into the safe zone, but barely managed to make to the boat as the sharks saw them as more appetizing due to the redneck octopuses being sea life.

Izzy's jump was very similar to how a sky diver would fall. While she was falling, she let out a mad cackle that many on the show would learn to fear.

When Justin dived into the water; he had accidently landed outside of the safe zone. As his teammates shouted for him to swim over to the transportation boat, Justin turned to see that the sharks were coming right for him. Just as it appeared that all hope was lost, the sharks stopped. If one looked closely, you might be able to see that the shark's eyes had turned into hearts. As if nothing was going on, Justin got on one of the shark's back, and rode it to the shore.

"Wow," the American, billionaire, producer commented, "I thought I had seen everything, but this is the first time I have seen gay sharks."

"I don't think I can do it," said Beth, she quickly accepted her chicken hat and went down the elevator while her teammates mocked her. Gwen looked apologetically at the farm girl.

* * *

 **Gwen:** I couldn't really be mad at her. I mean, from what I've seen, she is the only one sane enough on our team to drop out.

* * *

Bojack and Frylock both managed to complete their dives with relative ease, and even though their weight and lack of legs made it hard for them to swim, Cartman, Meatwad, and Shake had somehow managed to do their jumps without many problems. The next diver was Trent.

"Alright let's do this," said Trent as he high fived Kenny and Owen before he made his dive. Unfortunately, he, like Tyler and Fry, hit a buoy. This caused another full camp wince as Leela was forced to help the music man up on the boat.

"Foolish Earth Hogs!" shouted Zim, "Watch as Zim completes a masterful dive." Zim then jumped off the cliff and did indeed hit the water. Zim then began to scream as steam came off Zim as he pulled himself out of the water, and then he twitched on the deck of the boat like an electrified fish.

* * *

 **Gwen:** I personally agree with Dib, I think Zim is an alien.

 **Izzy:** Alien.

 **Stan:** Alien.

 **Rick** : Yup, Definitely an alien.

* * *

Next it was Kenny's turn. Like many others, Kenny dived and landed outside of the safe zone. Then the poor parka wearing boy noticed the fins that were circling around him. As he let out a muffled scream the sharks pounced on him and dragged him underwater. After several moments of waiting, a much mauled Parka was thrown up on the shore.

"Oh my God!" shouted Stan, "They killed Kenny!

"You bastards!" Kyle shouted at the sharks, which at the moment were using toothpicks.

"Well," said a rather disgusted, but still smiling Chris, "he still hit the water so technically he still counts, so now it's down to you Owen. But no pressure." Owen gave a small smile. "Okay, there's pressure." The smile disappeared.

* * *

 **Owen:** I was pretty darn nervous, I mean, I'm not exactly what you'd call a strong swimmer.

 **Geoff:** I look at this guy, and I say, there's no way he can do it.

 **Gwen:** I thought, if he jumps, he's going to die.

 **Stan:** I mean, look what happened to Kenny.

* * *

Owen slipped on water wings, as he prepared to jump. Chris, in an attempt to avoid a lawsuit, attempted to psyche up Owen. "Take a good running start, you can do this buddy." Owen stepped back a couple of steps.

"I'm going to die now," said Owen before he charged over the side. "For Kenny!" He shouted as he fell. After several seconds, Owen belly flopped on the water, sending an explosion of water that sent all the campers, and even the sharks, barreling into the beach.

"The winners are the Screaming Gophers!" shouted Chris through a mega phone.

As his teammates began to cheer him, Owen noticed something odd. "Um," he said, "I think I lost my bathing suit." All those present, including the sharks, let out a cry of disgust."

* * *

As the gophers sang a walking tune while they used the carts to pull the crates, the bass were having trouble. While a few were able to move their boxes with relative ease (D.J., Eva, Ed, Bender, Jack, Rick) others were not so lucky. Courtney got a splinter, and then insulted by Eva; Double D, despite his prowess with lifting refrigerators, was having trouble with his crate, and Stan, Kyle and Courage were so small that they all had to push one box.

After a few minutes of carrying, Tyler dropped his box in order to go take a piss, as did Sadie and Katie. The girls went to the opposite side of a group of trees than Tyler. While the three were using the bathroom, a bug landed on Courtney's eye and when she smacked it, she squeaked, "I think something just bit me."

* * *

While the Bass were struggling to keep up, the gophers had just reached the campgrounds, and there they began their attempts to open the crates. Unfortunately, Chris had come up with a rule that they could not open up the crates with their hands. This could take a while.

* * *

"All better?" asked Eva as Katie and Sadie returned. When they replied positively, the Killer Bass girls began moving again. At this time Courtney's eye began to swell up from the bug sting. After a few seconds however, the twins stopped again, this time commenting that they were both afflicted by a weird itching on their backsides.

* * *

"Hey," Izzy muffled to Gwen and Cartman as she pulled a rope that would open the crates with her teeth, "I think I got it open." The crate she was pulling on fell open, but Gwen was more concerned with the state of Izzy's body. "Ow!" Izzy screamed, "Rope burn on my tongue."

"Well," said Cartman as he picked up a piece of equipment, "Everything seems in order-Oh no! Not that fucking thing again!" Before Gwen could question Cartman on his screaming, the Sloppy Joe monster from earlier jumped out and attached itself to Cartman's face… again. "Some one get this stupid thing off me!" screamed Cartman as he began to roll around on the ground. Gwen quickly grabbed a side of the crate and started hitting the monster, eventually forcing it to abandon its attack. As it left to go hide Gwen realized that Cartman's face was badly bruised.

"Oops," Gwen squeaked, "sorry."

"You need to learn to have better aim you stupid bitch." Gwen frowned and then proceeded to resume the beating of the fat boy while the others tried to open the crates.

* * *

 **Gwen:** Well, no one insults me like that, especially some fat boy from Colorado.

* * *

The Bass were continuing the long trek up to the cabins, and Katie and Sadie's backsides had begun to grow red. When they stopped to scratch, Chris drove up in an ATV. "You guys are way behind," he said. "What's the hold up?"

"Their butts are itchy," when Chris turned to the person who spoke these words, what he saw was Courtney, with a horrific swollen eye decorating her face.

"Guh!" said Chris in disgust, "Oh my boxers that's bad," referencing the horribly treated eye.

Bridgette, who had already come back to help from the front, suddenly asked the girls, "Did you squat when you went to the bathroom?"

"Yeah," said a confused Katie.

"Did you happen to notice what type of plants you were squatting over?"

"They were oval shaped, green, and all over the place," explained Sadie.

"You guys squatted on poison ivy," Bridgette said with more than a little laughter in her voice. The twins began screaming bloody murder as Bridgette began to push the other crates.

* * *

"Hey check it out," said Owen as he held up some two by fours. Jonesy also pulled out some tools and a pool liner. As Leshawna was digging through her crate, Heather and Lindsey came up to her to talk.

"Leshawna," said Heather, "I'd just like to say sorry for how things went earlier today."

"Strait up?" said Leshawna in mild surprise, "Well, I guess I'm sorry for pushing you over a cliff earlier."

"Thanks."

While they were walking away, Lindsey asked Heather, "Did you mean all that stuff you said to Lefunda back there?"

"First of all her name is Leshawna," said Heather, "and no, haven't you ever heard the saying 'keep your friends close and your enemies closer?"

"Oh," said Lindsey, before fearfully turning to Heather, "I'm your friend right?"

"Oh yeah," said Heather, before turning away from the blonde and commenting, "For now."

* * *

The Killer Bass had finally brought up all their crates, while the Gophers had already started to construct their hot tub. Leshawna then noticed something about the Bass. "Hey, aren't you missing a couple of white girls?"

"Apparently," said Duncan in an annoyed tone, "They're sitting in a lake until Double D and Jen can find some aloe."

Then Leshawna noticed an even more horrific sight. "Oh," she said, "what happened to your eye girl?"

"Nothing," said Courtney nervously, "just an allergy."

"I think it's getting worse, eh," said a rather concerned Ezekiel.

"Shush," said Courtney to her teammate, "We don't want them to know that, I'm a CIT, I'm our most valuable member."

"Yeah," said a rather ticked off Stan, "Our most valuable member is a fucking coward."

* * *

In many ways Geoff had realized that after Owen jumped he would have to go Braveheart on his team. While they were, at least in his eyes, the more physical team, he had seen when Courtney's gamble had cost his team big. While D.J. had overcome his fear, and would have scored if not for Chris's sadism, Courtney had been a chicken and instead of just jumping, had cost her team supplies and the carts. This game was meant to make you test your limits, and if you refused to do so, Geoff believed you did not deserve to be on the show. Putting his dislike of Courtney aside, Geoff began to give what he considered the best possible pep talk for the situation.

"Alright!" he shouted at his teammates, "Look, we are behind, but we are not out! We have all made mistakes during this challenge. (I haven't done anything wrong! - Duncan). Some have made bigger ones than others, but we need to band together, win this challenge, and win that hot tub party, WHO'S WITH ME?!"

Duncan was carving a skull into a piece of wood.

Harold was sleeping.

Ezekiel was picking his nose.

Geoff heard clapping. He quickly turned around only to realize it was in fact the Gophers who were giving him applause.

"Nice speech," mocked Heather, "Maybe when you're done with this contest, you should join the theater club, at least someone will actually listen to you."

* * *

 **Geoff:** How'd she know I was in the theater club?

 **Gwen:** I kind of feel sorry for Geoff. I mean, he get's stuck on a team with the clumsy jock, wonder twins, and Ms. CIT. Plus that speech wasn't too bad.

 **D.J.:** I personally thought that Geoff did an excellent job. I mean, at least we actually tried to make the tub after that.

* * *

"Look guys," Courtney interjected, "we have a hot tub to complete, and we need a project manager, and since I'm a CIT, I feel as though I'm the only one qualified."

The entire group looked incredulous at the CIT. "Where do we begin, Cyclops?" said Duncan.

As the group began to listen to Courtney's orders, Geoff began to realize the pure hopelessness of the situation. She had ordered Duncan to get water, Double D and Morty to set the frame, and Jack to build the motor. As he saw the campers becoming confused or aggravated by the situation, Geoff dawned on the realization that the Killer Bass Team was a sinking ship in this challenge, and he was the poor captain who would be forced to go down with it.

* * *

When Chris began to judge the tubs, it was obvious to everyone, sans Courtney, who had won. While the Bass's tub was filled with leaks, the wood on the Gopher's was completely sealed. The water in the Bass tub was green, compared to the completely chlorinated water that the gophers had. The Bass's tub did not even have its motor attached properly.

"This is an awesome hot tub," said Chris while pointing at the Gopher's project. He then turned to the tub made by the Bass, "This one not so much. So, I am pleased to say that the Screaming Gophers have won the first challenge." A cheer went up on the Gopher side of the field. "Killer Bass," Chris said in a rather disappointed tone, "what can I say, someone's going home tonight."

"Okay," said Andrew as he pulled out the MVC trophy," the first MVC on Total Drama Island is…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

Owen, for a high pressure jump, avenging Kenny, and giving mild help to the hauling and building process."

"Alright! Shouted Owen as the rest of the Gophers applauded, "I wonder how many donuts I could buy with $5000."

Cody took out a calculator, "approximately six thousand donuts." Owens screams of joy could be heard all the way in his home town, where a local donut shop owner for some reason felt the need to bless the great lord above.

As the Geoff walked back to his Cabin, ignoring the sounds of victory from the Gophers, only one person came to his mind when he thought of who to vote off, Courtney.

* * *

Geoff let a small smile cover his mouth as the group began to plan the choice for elimination. Just as he envisioned, every single member of the Bass wanted Courtney gone. But just as it became clear that there was no way that Courtney could weasel her way out of this elimination, fate made sure the night's vote would be far more dramatic.

"I just don't get how we lost eh," said Ezekiel in his Canadian accent, "They have more girls than we do."

With that one little statement, Ezekiel, Geoff realized, had given Courtney a shred of hope that she could escape her well deserved punishment. The Bass table was now a war zone, and Geoff realized unless he wanted to lose again or have the girls shun the guys, he was going to have to find away to fix up the relationship between Ezekiel and the girls.

* * *

"So much for this being an easy turnaround," said Geoff as he walked into the Boy's bass cabin. He now had several bruises covering his body. Maybe he should have told someone else to talk Eva out of voting off Zeke. "So how'd it go with you guys?"

"Well," said D.J., "I talked to Bridgette about voting off Courtney, and she threatened that unless I vote for Ezekiel, she'll throw me to the sharks." He then hid under the covers. "No more sharks Momma, no more sharks."

"Jen isn't going to give in," said Jude through a fat lip, "man she must be really using that boxing game I taught her a lot these days."

"Wonder twins aren't budging either," said Duncan, "Dude why do we even care, if all of the boys vote for Courtney, then the girls votes won't matter."

"Well Duncan if I may interject," said Double D, "what Geoff is worried about is that the girls will get so angry at us that they will refuse to work with us, go on strike if you will. And personally I feel like that might mean complete disaster for us in the next challenge."

"This is all your fault Ezekiel!" shouted Duncan at the home schooled boy, who was hiding under the sheets like D.J.

"How was I supposed to know," squeaked Ezekiel, "I was raised by prairie people for Pete's Sake."

"Look dudes," said Geoff, "We need to realize that this all stems from Courtney and her bossy and cowardly attitude."

"Guys!" shouted Ron as he entered the Cabin, "I made a break through."

* * *

"Sure," said Kim as she looked at the Bass boys, "I'll help you calm down the girls until they think rationally."

"Why aren't you going all KP over home school's butt," asked Wyatt. The mentioning of his nickname caused Ezekiel to hide even farther behind D.J.

"Two reasons," Kim responded, "One, I can completely see that Courtney needs to go so that the Killer Bass can win. The second reason is that even though what he said was wrong, I know Ezekiel doesn't have much experience with girls and I feel like he is probably sorry now."

Jack simply walked up to Jack, bowed, and said, "Thank you very much for your assistance, Ms. Possible." Kim simply returned the bow.

* * *

"Okay girls," shouted Courtney, "are we going to let a bunch of boys push us around?" When she received a resounding "NO", Courtney couldn't help but smirk. She couldn't believe her luck. At first, it had looked like she would be unfairly (at least in her eyes) voted off. Now, however, thanks to that Ezekiel, she just might be able to get him voted off. She was sure that she could then come up with a new plan before the next time the Bass came up for elimination. That is when Kim entered the room.

"So Kim," Courtney asked, "are you ready to go demand that the boys vote Ezekiel off."

"I'm not voting for Ezekiel, I'm voting for you."

"What," shouted Courtney with unrighteous fury, "don't tell me you don't think what he said was offensive."

"It was," admitted Kim, "but that doesn't mean I should place that in front of whether we win or not."

"Listen Kim," said Bridgette, trying to defuse the CIT, "what that guy said is everything that opposes what you are. The super hero who little girls look up. For many people, you're Wonder Woman. You show people girls can be just as strong, if not stronger than boys."

Kim gave a small laugh, "Look Bridgette, while I'm very flattered that you think I'm that special, I'm not. I just do what I do to save the world. Ron is with me everywhere I go, and in truth, he is always in more danger than I am. I've seen him charge through lasers lacking the natural agility that I posses. But that doesn't mean I don't find what Ezekiel said offensive. What I realize it that he was raised by, and I quote, "Freaky Prairie People." So I'm pretty sure he has no background with girls."

As Kim left the conversation at that, Courtney couldn't help but feel that her chance of survival had just slipped away.

* * *

 _(Campfire 8:30PM)_

Chris came out with his usual sadistic smile as he looked at the team in front of him. He then held up a plate of Marshmallows. "Killer Bass," said Chris in overly dramatic fashion, "on Total Drama Island, Marshmallows represent life." Snickering overcame the Bass. "You've all cast your votes and made your decision; there are only 29 marshmallows here. One of you is going to walk the dock of shame and then ride the boat of loser's, hope you all chose wisely, because they can't come back, ever."

"First one goes to Geoff."

Geoff quickly retrieved his marshmallow.

"D.J."

D.J also went up.

"Bridgette, Tyler, Katie, Eva, Kim, Rick, Jack and Harold."

All the called campers had acquired their marshmallows.

"Sadie, Dib, Double D, Eddy, Courage, Stan, Kyle, Bender, and Homer."

Again the group of campers came up, this time the wonder twins screaming as they hugged each other.

"Ron, Jude, Wyatt, Jen, Ed, Morty, Grim, Duncan, and Peter."

When these campers came up, all that was left was Courtney and Ezekiel.

"Courtney, Ezekiel, one of you did not receive a marshmallow tonight. So one of you must leave here, forever."

"The last marshmallow goes to…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

… (Will you just get the hell on with it? –Kyle)

…

…

…

…Ezekiel."

"What!" shouted an astonished Courtney as Ezekiel ran up to grab the sweet, "I can't believe you would choose the sexist over me? What did he ever do?"

"One very simple thing," said a slightly ticked off Geoff, "He jumped."

"I'll get you all back!" Courtney screamed as she was dragged to the boat by Chef and Chris.

"Can't say I'm surprised Dudette," commented Chris, "You were way to bossy."

As Courtney screamed from the boat, the Bass returned to their cabin.

* * *

 **Gwen:** Yep, so far this camp still sucks, but hey, if I here already, I should probably try to win, right?

* * *

Cody raised a glass, "to the Screaming Gophers," he toasted.

"Gophers!" exclaimed Trent, Justin, Lindsey, Heather, Fry, Leela, Bojack, Caitlin and Jonesy as they sat in the hot tub.

"Go, Gophers, go Gophers," chanted Leshawna as she danced tauntingly at the returning Bass. She was soon joined by Owen, Noah, Cartman, Early, Billy, Meatwad, and surprisingly, Kenny. "Go gophers!"

"Hey," shouted an astonished Harold as he pointed at Kenny, "Aren't you dead?"

"Well apparently," said Trent from the hot tub, "Every time Kenny dies, he manages to revive himself just at 8 P.M. on his bed, so we really don't need to be to upset when he dies."

As Gwen watched the rather confused faces of the Bass, she noticed Geoff was walking off on his own. Gwen couldn't help but feel bad for the poor guy who had tried his hardest to rally the team. Gwen then decided for some reason that she didn't feel like partying, told the others good night, and went to sleep.

* * *

 **Geoff:** I feel kinda mixed about tonight. I mean I didn't want to keep Courtney, but I didn't want to send anyone home. Well, all I can say is that we need to win some challenges so we don't have to go through this process that often.

* * *

 _ **AN: See you next chapter!**_


	3. Chapter 3

Chris: last time on Total Drama Island. The campers all jumped, Spiderman appeared, and Kenny was killed. Eventually, the Gophers won the challenge, and after a few slight altercations, it was Courtney who was forced to walk the dock of shame.

Can the Bass rebound from last challenge?

Will Trent finally talk?

And will I finally get back at that goody two-shoe producer?

Find out next on Total Drama Island!

* * *

 _(Cue theme music)_

* * *

Chris walked up to the Cabins, holding a megaphone, and then put an air horn behind it. He then pushed to button. The sound carried all through camp, there by waking up all of the campers.

"Man,'" muttered Leshawna, "It's seven in the morning, do I look like a farmer to you?"

* * *

As the campers were standing outside, Cody tried to touch Eva's mp3 player, which nearly resulted in him losing a finger.

As Chris walked up to the campers. "Hope you all slept well," Chris said, "because your next challenge begins in one minute."

"Um, excuse me," Owen said, "I'm not sure that's enough time to eat breakfast."

"Oh, you'll get breakfast Owen," Chris said while his sadistic smile grew in size, "As soon as you complete your twenty kilometer run around the island."

"Oh so your funny now?" growled Eva as she attempted to punch the host's lights out.

"Please Eva," said Kim soothingly, "get a hold of your temper."

* * *

 **Kim:** Eva really needs to learn to control her anger; I mean she's already nearly choked Zeke to death.

* * *

The two sets of campers were preparing to run the lap. "Alright, runners," shouted Chris, "On your mark, get set, go!"

As the sun beat down on the campers, some were proving to be able to take the heat. Others were not so fortunate. Some like Owen and Homer were having trouble due to physical difficulty. Others, like Heather, were just being stubborn.

* * *

 **Heather:** I don't run. And I defiantly don't run in high heels.

* * *

As Heather continued walking, she suddenly walked by Owen, who was lapping up water from a stream like dog. "Can't, catch, breath," panted Owen as he continued to drink from the stream, "Must have, Condition." He then collapsed into the water, unable to hold himself up any longer.

"Yeah," said an indignant Heather, "It's called over eating, look it up."

"Well what's your excuse," panted Leshawna as she leaned on a tree, "you skinny, annoying, whoo, to tired for insults."

Chris suddenly came by on his motor scooter. "Pick it up people," he shouted through the megaphone, "If you're not back by dinner time, you don't eat."

"I hate that guy so much," muttered Heather as she began to walk again. When she began to walk, she walked right over the exhausted Owen, who was unable to lift himself up in defense.

* * *

Several of the more athletic campers (D.J., Trent, Duncan, etc.) were sitting down in the mess hall, waiting for the stragglers to arrive. Of those who were there, some were completely tired out, while others, like Geoff, appeared to be fine. Chris was spending his time filing his nails while they waited for the other campers. Owen then barged in with Noah apparently unconscious on his shoulder.

"Clear a table stat!" shouted Owen as he then threw Noah down on the nearest table. Owen then began to attempt to revive the egghead. Leshawna was the nest member to arrive.

"Oh," she said, "We made it."

"Darn it Harold!" Duncan shouted at the nerd, who was the last to arrive, "because of you, we lost the challenge."

Harold answered, "I think I'm having heart palpations."

"Wait a minute," Gwen said, as what Duncan said dawned on her, "If they lost, that means we won." The entire Gopher team let out a cheer, even Noah who had apparently been faking his unconscious state.

"Whoa there," said Chris with his same sadistic smile, "hold your horse's guys. That wasn't the challenge."

"What did he just say?" asked a shocked Nikki.

"Who's," Chris shouted as a curtain was pulled away, thus revealing a feast that would cause even royalty to drool, "Hungry?

* * *

 **Gwen:** After a week of eating nothing but brown slop, I almost cried when I saw the buffet.

 **Owen:** And then I saw it, the buffet table! It had turkey, and applesauce, and maple syrup, and baked beans and… I need a moment. (Cries tears of joy)

 **Double D:** Perhaps I should save a few things for the refrigerator.

 **Dib:** I need to convince everybody that Zim is an alien, or else who knows what will happen?

 **Ezekiel** : I kind of think I'm on thin ice, eh.

* * *

After the entirety of the feast had been eaten, or moved to the fridge, the sounds of campers complaining about full stomachs began to sound. Chris then jumped out, while still holding a megaphone, and began to address the campers.

"Okay campers, are you ready for the next challenge!"

"I thought eating was the challenge," said Owen through still stuffed cheeks.

"What more do you want from us," said Gwen as she held her swollen stomach.

"Weird Goth Girl is right," Heather said, also holding her stomach, "Haven't we been through enough."

"Let me think about that," Chris said sarcastically, "NO! It's time for the Awake-a-thon!"

"The what-a-thon," questioned a tired Ed.

"Don't worry," said Chris, sadistically, "This is an easy one. The team with the last camper standing wins invincibility."

"So," said Gwen, "what you're saying is that the run and the feast were just to a part of your evil plan to make it harder for us to stay awake during the real challenge."

"That's right Gwen," shouted Chris happily.

"Man he's good," said Gwen angrily, and Leshawna couldn't help but nod her head in agreement.

"Move, move!" shouted Chris as the campers went to the campfire pit to be watched. Trent then walked up to Gwen.

"How long do you think it will be before everyone is out cold," Trent asked.

"About an hour, give or take, "replied Gwen before looking at the completely exhausted Owen, "maybe less."

* * *

 _(12 hours)_

"Were now twelve hours into the challenge," said Chris in a quiet voice, "and all fifty-nine campers are still wide awake." While most campers appeared to be dead men, and women, walking, Owen was excitedly bouncing around like nothing was going on."

"Wahoo!" shouted Owen, "stay awake for twelve hours; I can do that in my sleep. Wahoo!"

In light of poetic justice, Owen was the first to fall to the ground in an unconscious thud.

* * *

 **Gwen:** The awake-a-thon was defiantly the hardest and most brutal thing I have ever had to go through.

 **Ezekiel:** I didn't really think it was that hard. I mean I've worked my whole life on a farm, so I don't really need much sleep.

* * *

As an exhausted Nikki hit the ground, thus taking the Gopher's number down to twenty-eight, Gwen commented to Trent, "This is the most boring thing I have ever done in my life."

"Ah, come on," said Trent, "It could be worse."

"How?"

"I could be stuck here without you to talk to," answered Trent, which caused Gwen to blush.

* * *

 **Andrew:** I decided I would take advantage of the coffee craze that effects all teens to make the challenge move faster. And yes, I'm allowed in here. I also know that Chris is trying to get back at me, so I don't plan on taking my eyes off him.

* * *

"Who wants coffee!" shouted Andrew as he carried in four cups of the hot liquid.

"Give me that!" shouted Fry as he grabbed two cups of Coffee and began to chug them. Andrew then handed out the other cups to Jonesy and Trent.

"Don't worry," Trent said to Gwen, "I'll give you some after I've had a few sips." As Trent and Jonesy took the first few sips, Gwen suddenly smelled something weird about the coffee.

"What's in the coffee?" she asked as Andrew turned to her, a smile attached to his face that reminded her of a certain host.

"Oh milk, sugar, powder," as soon as he said this, Jonesy and Trent suddenly spat out as much coffee as possible, but it was too late. Both hit the ground in seconds, soon followed by Fry who had already drank two cups of the concoction.

"No Trent," begged Gwen, "don't leave me with these idiots." As the three were dragged away, Heather then began to examine her still standing teammates.

* * *

 **Heather:** So, my strategy is to get four other campers to form an alliance with me, and take to the final five. The only question is who. I mean at least one of them should be competent enough to be able to strategize with me.

* * *

"What are you doing?" asked Gwen to Lindsey, who was standing on her head.

"Trying to get the blood to flow to my head," said Lindsey.

"Oh can I try?" asked Beth, who wanted to be friends with Lindsey.

"I heard that totally works," said Caitlin, who was lonely now that she was the only member of her friends on her team who was still conscious.

"Idiots," mumbled a rather ticked off Mandy.

"Perfect," said Heather as she looked at the four girls interact, "Lindsey, Beth, Caitlin, Mandy, could you come over here for a second."

* * *

"Okay," whispered Heather to her planned alliance mates, "I have a plan to get myself and four other people to the Final five, and I chose you guys." As Beth, Lindsey, and Caitlin seemed excited by the prospect, Mandy gave a harsh eye to Heather as the others walked away.

When the other three were out of earshot, Mandy said, "I can understand getting those idiots in your alliance, but just so you now, I will not give into nearly as many demands as they will."

"Oh I know," Heather replied, "but I chose you because I will need at least some intelligent conversation in this alliance." As she said this, Mandy couldn't help but mentally smile, (she would never let a real one cross her face) at the thought of forcing Grim to be her slave forever. While Mandy was thinking this, Heather was reprimanding Lindsey for talking about the possibility of her dating Tyler.

* * *

 **Lindsey:** Heather said I couldn't date him, she never said I couldn't like him.

* * *

"I'm going to the bathroom," said Eva as she put her headphones in her pocket. As she walked by Heather, the princess noticed that Eva had dropped her mp3. Heather then nonchalantly went over and picked up the music machine, and returned to her seat.

"Isn't that Eva's mp3 player?" asked Lindsey, as she and the other alliance members took notice of the music device in Heathers hand.

"Yep," replied Heather cunningly, as she pocketed said device.

"Well," asked Lindsey, "Isn't that going to make her really mad when she realizes it's gone?"

"That's exactly what I'm counting on," said Heather evilly as a crafty smirk adorned her face. Mandy quickly realized what Heather was talking about, and though she still didn't smile, she did give her approval.

* * *

 **Mandy:** This Heather is my kind of girl. I mean she may be all queen bee, but she is a cunning strategist. I also look forward to being her downfall.

* * *

 _(24 hours)_

At the mark of the first day being done, several campers had dropped out, and both teams now had fewer than 30 members. The gophers currently possessed twenty one conscious campers, as Owen, Nikki, Fry, Jonesy, Trent, Izzy, Billy, Shake, and Stewie had now fallen asleep. On the Bass, there were twenty four members, who were still standing, as Katie, Sadie, Eddy, Stan, Kyle and Wyatt had also fallen asleep. Of all the campers, it was Zim who was apparently least affected by sleep deprivation. His eyes had not even closed or even blinking. Dib was also wide awake; as he had promised himself that he would stay awake longer than Zim.

"Congratulations campers," said a well rested Chris, "you have made it to the twenty-four hour mark. Time to kick things up a notch." Chris then pulled a blanket off a pile of books, as Chef, dressed up like a sheep, walked up next to him. The books were, as fate would happen to have it, all fairy tales.

"Oh he cannot be serious," said a distraught Gwen, as Chris began to read the rather boring tale. The tale had the desired effect, as many campers' eyes began to grow heavy. Cartman, who was still awake, attempted to dig under one of the seats. Brian, who was still rather awake, noticed this.

"What the hell are you doing?" Brian asked the fat boy, just as he pulled a box out from under the stump.

"Well ya see," explained Cartman, "on the first day, I dug under here and put a box of candy under this stump, just incase of an emergency. Glad I did, cause now I have a way to stay a-Oh shit not that fucking thing again!" as Cartman screamed, the Sloppy Joe monster jumped from the box, attaching itself to Cartman's face. As his screams echoed across the island, Cartman ran over to the side of a boulder. He then began to continually bash his head against it. This eventually caused the creature to let go and make another great escape, but it was too late for Cartman. He had already knocked himself out with the repeated blows to the head.

For some reason, The Dance of the Sugarplum was heard in the background as Chef began to dance around in a pink tutu. The even stranger thing was that when Chef danced, he was apparently spreading magic dust that caused people to get sleepy. As it turned out, it was D.J. that succumbed to the dust, thus causing the tree he had tied himself to, to fall. This, unfortunately for the Gophers, caused him to land on Kenny, thus killing the parka wearing boy, thus eliminating him from the competition.

"ZZZZZ-Oh my God-ZZZ-they killed Kenny-ZZZZZZ," snored Stan, who even though he was asleep, somehow knew when to say the line.

"ZZZZZ-You-ZZZZZ-Bastards-ZZZZ,' Kyle also said completely in sync with his unconscious friend.

* * *

 _(40 hours)_

Both teams had taken major hits during this period, as both teams were now under 20 members. The Gophers were now down to thirteen members, as Meatwad, Frylock, Bart, Cartman, Kenny, Leshawna, Cody, and Noah had all fallen asleep. The Bass were affected even more dramatically, as they were down to fourteen members, as Courage, Double D, Jude, Jen, Ron, Kim, Bridgette, D.J., Tyler, and finally Geoff had succumb to the exhausting conditions that they had gone through.

Heather then attempted to move along her alliance plans. "We should talk strategy," she said to Lindsey, who she nudged.

Lindsey was so tired that all she was unable to give any reply other than an exhausted, "huh," before she fell, asleep, to the ground behind her stump.

"Beth," as Heather said this, Beth also could be seen asleep, as could Mandy and Caitlin. Heather suddenly realized she was the only member of her alliance to still be in the challenge.

Gwen continued to try to stay awake by any means possible. This mostly meant doodling Chris and Chef in horrible situations in her sketchbook. Just as she finished one involving Chris being eaten by an elephant, she noticed that for some reason, Owen's clothes were lying abandoned. She then looked over to the woods, and she was shocked to see a naked Owen walking into the woods.

* * *

 **Owen** : Did I mention that I sleep walk after I eat baked beans.

* * *

Gwen, in an attempt to forget the horrible sight she had just seen, began to look at what remained of the campers. Heather was looking incredibly tired, and she smirked at how mad the queen bee must be since she has not put on any make up in several days. Zim, who she was sure was an alien, had still yet to blink. Brian was looking dog tired, no pun intended, and Justin had not even sat down. She then stood up and went over to Justin, hoping to learn his secret.

"Look at him;" Gwen said to the remaining contestants, "he's like a statue." Gwen then touched Justin, only for Justin to open his eyes. Eva had seen what had just occurred.

"Hey, he's cheating, he painted his eyes, I saw it!"

"No way," laughed Chris, "I gotta see this." Chris then ran up to Justin and examined his eyelids. Chris the exclaimed, "that's wicked awesome dude, but unfortunately, you're still out dude." Justin then frowned as he walked to the loser area.

* * *

While these events took place, Owen had some how joined a group of salmon after falling in a river. Currently, he was somehow climbing up a waterfall. Apparently not even the laws of gravity can keep that camper down.

* * *

 _(85 hours)_

Some how, a few of the campers had been able to stay awake for 85 hours. For the Gophers, it was Zim, Gwen, and Heather. For the Bass, it was Jack, Duncan, Rick, Ezekiel, Eva, and Dib. As Dib finally began to feel he would lose to his nemesis, he heard something. It sounded like snoring. He suddenly looked at Zim, and realized that even though his eyes were open, he was snoring. In one quick motion, Dib rushed up to Zim, and somehow grabbed the eyes. Dib then pulled, and the eye came out, or off would be a better term. Zim slept through the whole thing. Suddenly, one was able to see that Zim's eyes were indeed closed. Suddenly everyone realized that Zim had indeed cheated, while his luck was good, Dib also pulled at Zim's hair, pulling it off with less ease than the eye, so it woke Zim up.

"What?" questioned Zim, whose real eye color was pure red, and without his wig, he possessed two antennas.

"Well," said a rather freaked out Chris, "looks like Zim is not only out, but that Dib was right about him being an alien."

"Ha!" laughed Dib as Zim was forced to the loser circle. His joy was short lived however, because he soon fell asleep.

* * *

 **Dib:** I told you he was an alien, I am not crazy. Wahoo!

* * *

"Come on will you fall asleep already!" shouted Chris at the exhausted campers, he then shouted at the losers, "Alright, if you slept, go take a shower, you stink. The rest of you come up here."

As the remaining campers trudged to the front, Chris took a cup of coffee before addressing them, "I didn't want it to come to this-."

"Yes you did," shouted Andrew from a distance, causing Chris to scowl.

"As I was saying," continued Chris, "I even told Chef that last night. I said 'I didn't want it to come to this, but these campers are tough damn it.' So I was forced to find the most boring activity imaginable."

* * *

 **Gwen:** Oh what now, you know what, bring it on.

* * *

Chris then pulled out a rather large book. "The History of Canada," said Chris, "a pop-up book, chapter one, the beaver, national symbol, and a "Dam" fine hat."

The remaining campers all groaned in annoyance at the horrible joke the host had made.

* * *

Speaking of Beavers, a group of Beavers was currently using Owen as part of their own dam. Since he was sleeping, he really didn't care.

* * *

Soon, after only one chapter, Heather and Eva had fallen asleep and Duncan having fallen asleep on the can after going to the washrooms, leaving Gwen as the last member of the Gophers to face off against Jack, Rick, and Ezekiel of the Bass. Gwen realized that if she was to have any chance, she would have to find away to tire out her competition.

"Hey," said Gwen, "don't you guys miss your beds, all comfy and warm."

"Well," said Ezekiel, "I always sleep on a straw bed, so it's really uncomfortable."

"I haven't slept in a bed for so long," said Jack adding his own two cents, "I have to say that the bunks are actually quite comfy."

"And I'm already drunk as piss to care enough either way," said Rick.

"Aw come on guys," pleaded Gwen, "beds are great. You sleep in your own beds, with clean sheets, a warm blanket, and a (yawn) comfy mattress." As soon as she finished the sentence, Gwen fell asleep because of her own trap. When Chris saw this, he held up Jack's, Rick's, and Ezekiel's arms and declared them the victors.

"This week's MVC," said Andrew as he walked up with the trophy," goes to …

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

… Ezekiel, because even though he lacks samurai and drunken endurance, he made it all the way to the end." Ezekiel couldn't help but blush when Jack and a few others who had come back to watch, (Geoff, Bridgette, and D.J.) cheered him for his well deserved victory.

All however, was not right with the Bass team.

* * *

 _(Bass)_

"Ahhhh!" screamed Eva as she threw stuff out of the cabin. The rest of the campers were so scared, they refused to go in and help her. "Where is my Mp3 player," she shouted, "No one leaves until I get it back, I need my music." She then threw a book, which just barely missed Harold.

"Okay," said Kim, "who ever has her mp3 player better give it up now before she destroys the whole camp."

"Hey guys," Heather said cheerfully, "what's going on?"

"Some one stole Eva's mp3 player," Jen explained as she pointed to the cabin where Eva was still searching.

"You don't mean this do you," said Heather, showing them the mp3 she had knowingly stolen, "I was wondering who it belonged to. I found it by the campfire pit, you must have dropped it."

"Oh thank you," said Eva as she grabbed her mp3 player as her campmates looked at her in disgust.

* * *

 **Heather:** even though she won't be voted off this time, the split I caused will probably hurt their team in the future.

 **Bridgette:** Eva better be glad that we won the challenge, cause I would have voted her rage-aholic butt off this island.

 **Gwen:** It was obvious when the gophers arrived who would be voted off the island.

* * *

"Okay Gophers," said Chris, "you guys lost the challenge today, so now you have to vote one of our own off. And they can never come back. Ever!"

"So, the first marshmallow goes to, Gwen."

Gwen caught her marshmallow.

"Owen."

Chris threw a marshmallow, but no one was there to grab it.

"Hey, you guys seen Owen." When a resounding no was given, Chris couldn't' help but wonder where the big guy was.

* * *

Owen, after a long adventure, had finally stopped sleep walking. Unfortunately, he had stopped in front of Sasquatch's cave, which angered the mythical beast greatly. Before he knew it, Owen was traveling Air Bigfoot all the way to his cabin, where he landed in his bed, completely safe.

* * *

"Well, the next marshmallows go to Cartman, Kenny, Trent, Cody, and Heather."

All five, including Kenny, caught their marshmallows. Chris was still a little weirded out by Kenny's deaths but he learned that he would have to go with the flow.

"After them, are Jonesy, Nikki, Caitlin, Shake, and Frylock."

Like those before them, these campers caught their sweets without a word.

"Brian, Stewie, Bart, Noah, Justin, and Bojack."

They all also caught their marshmallows.

"Izzy, Mandy, Lindsey, Beth, Meatwad, and Leshawna."

These final six caught their marshmallows, thus leaving only two campers without the treats. Surprisingly, the two seemed without pressure, as Billy was sticking his finger in his ear, and Zim, (who did not posses his disguise), seemed to be laughing to himself.

"And the last Marshmallow goes to…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

… (Please just give it out already –Gwen)

…

…

… "Billy."

"Yeah!" shouted Billy as a marshmallow landed in his mouth.

"What!" shouted a shocked Zim, "You cannot do this to the almighty Zim!"

"Dude," said Chris, "what did you expect, you're an alien."

"No!" screamed Zim as he was dragged to the Boat of Losers.

"Um?" asked a confused Brian, "what exactly will happen to him?"

"We have to wait until the show's done," said Andrew, "but once it's over we will turn him over to the proper authorities to be tested in painful experiments." The Gophers took this as a sign that everything would go well, all except one camper.

* * *

 **Stewie:** I will have to destroy this alien before the government can use his technology to stifle my plans for World Domination.

 **Geoff:** would you believe our reward is thirty bags of chips, twenty cases of soda, and a boom box. We can finally have that party we all wanted.

* * *

As the Gophers were walking back to their cabin, Geoff was looking out the window at them. He couldn't help but remember how bad it felt when the Bass had lost their challenge. 'So,' he thought to himself, 'why not cheer them up.'

"Hey guys," Geoff shouted at the Gophers, who turned around to see look at him, "we have plenty of extra chips and soda, why don't you come over and party!"

The Gophers all quickly agreed, and before they knew it, the Killer Bass Party had grown to include the entire camp, other than Owen and Duncan, who were still asleep, the later because the sleeping Drug had still not had enough time to work out of his system.

* * *

 **Gwen:** I thought it was nice how Geoff invited us over, nearly as nice as what Trent said earlier. But Geoff did it for all of us, including Heather, who did insult him, so he seems like a really nice guy.

 **Geoff:** I can't believe Zim was an alien, guess that goes to show that sometimes you should judge a book by its cover. Oh, especially if that cover has a story summary, that really does give you a good idea of what's going to occur in the book.

* * *

 _ **AN: Hope you enjoyed!**_


	4. Chapter 4

Chris: Last time on Total Drama Island, The campers were forced to endure a sleeping challenge. While that occurred, we tortured them with sleeping powder, fairy tales, and a pop up book about the history of Canada. In the end, MVC Ezekiel beat Gwen to give the Bass their first victory. The real action though, was happening at the Bass Cabin, as Eva freaked out about losing her mp3 player. It was in fact, taken by Heather, who was attempting to cause a rift in the Bass team. In the end, it was Zim who walked the dock of shame, as the campers just couldn't stand the alien.

Who will break the rules of their new alliance?

Will Gwen be able to stay awake until the end of the episode?

And who will take the next ride on the boat of losers?

Stay tuned for the most dramatic campfire ceremony yet. All here tonight, on Total Drama Island.

* * *

 _(Cue theme song)_

* * *

Most of the campers seemed quite wide awake and happy as they sat in the mess hall. Though for some reason the Bass appeared to be more tired than the Gophers. In particular was resting his head against the table.

"Duncan," said Chris, "You look like crap dude."

"Stuff it," replied Duncan, before laying his head down again. Kim then turned to Chris.

"Harold snored all night," she explained.

"Man, ninety hours without sleep," said Chris, "So how much pain are you in dude?"

"Wanna to find out?" growled Duncan as he held up a fist to the host.

"No, no it's cool," Chris said nervously.

As Harold walked in, it was shown that he was the victim of an unfortunate prank by Duncan. A mustache had been drawn on his face, and everyone snickered at him. The last camper to arrive was Gwen, who looked like she had been run over by a truck. As they sat down, Heather quickly turned to her alliance members.

"Let's go over the rules one more time," Heather said to her allies, "number one, I'm the captain of the alliance, so I get to make the rules. Number two-"

"Breaking the rules can result in getting kicked out of the alliance," completed Lindsey as Heather smiled.

"Good," said Heather before continuing, "number three, I can touch your stuff without asking, but my stuff is strictly off limits."

The other members of the alliance, even Mandy, looked uncomfortable now. "I don't now about that last rule," said Caitlin.

"That's cool," Heather said with a small smile, "I can also find someone else to take to the final five with me." The other members of the alliance except Mandy quickly shook their heads in fear.

"Okay campers," said Chris as he walked into the room, "your next challenge begins in ten minutes. And be prepared to bring it."

* * *

The campers were standing in a clear plastic room, with a hard wood floor. As Duncan walked in however, he just laid down on the bleacher. When the other campers looked at him questioningly, he growled, "Wake me up, and it will be the last thing you ever do."

As Chef, who was in a referee outfit, blew a whistle, Chris began to explain the challenge. "Today's challenge is the classic game," he held up a red ball, "of dodge-ball."

"No please!" screamed Double D as he dived behind Geoff, "I will not play this accursed game," Double D then appeared to enter a trance, "so many red balls, they're everywhere."

As everyone looked shocked at what happened, Eddy explained, "One time at school, we were playing dodge-ball, and everyone on his side had been knocked out, and the other side all aimed for him, and several of the balls hit him in the nuts." All the male campers felt a sudden pang of sympathy for the sock-hat boy.

* * *

 **Courage:** Oh man, I hate dodgeball too. Especially after I was almost blown up in the last game I played.

* * *

"The first rule," continued Chris, "of dodgeball is-"

"Do not talk about dodgeball," interjected Noah, as several others laughed.

"As I was saying," continued Chris, not losing his smile, "if you get hit with a ball, you're out." He suddenly threw the ball at Kim, who caught it easily.

"And if you catch a ball," continued Kim, interrupting the host again, "the thrower is out and the catcher can bring in one person form their team."

"Wow," said Noah sarcastically, "Throwing balls, another mentally challenging task."

"I know, right," said Lindsey, who wasn't sarcastic at all.

"Okay," said Chris throwing a ball to Geoff, "try to hit me." Chef then handed the sadist another ball. "You can use another ball to deflect a ball that is thrown at you."

"So," asked Lindsey, still somehow confused, "What do I do when a ball comes at me?"

Geoff took the opportunity to try to Chris, while Chris explained to Lindsey, "You dodge," as Chris deflected Geoff's ball, there by hitting Lindsey in the face.

"Ooh," winced Chris, "You were supposed to dodge."

"Ow," said Lindsey, before taking her hand off her fore head, thus revealing a giant welt, "right."

"You have one minute to decide who the first seven on the court art," said Chris, "Choose wisely."

* * *

"Alright," said Heather, "who wants to sit out the first round with sleeping beauty here."

"Alright," said Noah with fake reluctance, "I'll sit out. Now let's see you keeners get out their and dodge."

* * *

Gophers: Cartman, Lindsey, Owen, Cody, Kenny, Leshawna

Bass: Tyler, Harold, Stan, Eva, D.J., and Katie

"Bring it on fishies," said Heather, "other wise winning won't be as satisfying."

"Oh," said a shocked Tyler, "were gonna win, were going to have our cake, and eat it to." The rest of the bass groaned at the stupid pun he made.

"What an idiot," said Bender.

"Okay campers," said Chris, "best of five games wins. Now let's dodge some balls."

As chef blew the whistle, Cody threw a ball at Tyler, who dodged it. Tyler then glared at the computer nerd, who nervously smiled at the jock. Tyler then began to spin around like a top, allowing him to throw an incredibly fast ball. Unfortunately, the ball instead went to the side lines, hitting Sadie in the face. Chris, with his still sadistic smile present, said, "That will smear the make up." Owen then charged down the court, ball in hand, and threw the ball so hard it knocked Tyler all the way into the wall.

"Ow! Darn it," moaned Tyler as he held his stomach. Chef then blew the whistle, signifying that Tyler was out. Many on the Gopher bench cheered, except Noah, who was still reading his book.

"Time to unleash my wicked skills," said Harold as he threw the ball. The ball barely passed half court. Leshawna picked up the ball, and like Tyler before him, Harold soon became very closely acquainted to the clear back wall.

"And that's how we roll!" shouted Leshawna as the Gophers applauded.

Stan then picked up a ball and threw it. "Can some one tell me what I'm supposed to do with this again," said Lindsey with a ball, only for her to be floored by the ball Stan threw. As the Bass cheered for Stan, Lindsey looked up and saw Tyler wave at her. When she waved back, Heather saw their interaction; she threw the ball at Tyler, and hit him in the balls. As Tyler moaned in pain, Chef called foul and ejected Heather. Cartman then realized that they were tied, and shouted at Stan.

"Well what do you know," said Cartman, "Faggot boy has got some game!"

"Dude!" shouted Stan, "I'm not Gay!"

"Then why do you always hang out with Kahl?" said the fat boy mockingly. When Stan threw his ball to hit Cartman, Owen caught it. Stan was forced out and Gwen was brought in. However, as soon as she walked in, D.J. threw a ball at Owen, who ducked, thus causing the ball to hit Gwen. When D.J. tried to apologize, Gwen instead thanked him.

"Were losing!" shouted an irritated Eva, "just hand me the ball and I'll win this thing."

Eva did indeed grab a ball, and she chucked it so hard that it was like a cannon ball. Not too surprisingly, it hit Kenny, crushing him against the wall. As blood splattered out from the parka, everyone was disgusted.

"Oh my God!" said Stan, "She killed Kenny!"

"You Bastard!" shouted Kyle.

Eva, as punishment for killing Kenny, was pulled out of the game. Many campers look infuriated with the buff girl.

* * *

 **Kim:** Eva really needs to control her temper, just imagine if it wasn't Kenny that got hit.

 **Stan:** I'm not gay; I and Kyle are just best friends. And beside, I have a girlfriend, or, I used to at least.

* * *

It had come down to the final two on both sides, for the Gophers, it was Cody and Leshawna, and for the Bass, it was D.J. and Katie. Katie and D.J. both threw their balls at Leshawna, thus taking her out. That only left Cody.

Cody, in desperation, began to spin the ball, and then, after doing some rough estimates in his head, threw the ball. It went right past D.J., only to come back and hit him in the rump.

Chris couldn't help but comment on the throw, "That is one tough ball to dodge!"

Cody, now smiling deviously, began to rub the ball repeatedly against his shirt, thus creating static electricity. He then threw the ball, which began to chase Katie around. After several seconds of running away, Katie hit the back wall, and the ball bounced into her, thus giving the Gophers the win in the first match.

* * *

"Come on guys," said Harold, "If we give it our best, and believe in ourselves, we will win this challenge."

"Yeah, I believe you suck!" shouted Eva.

"Yeah, you throw like a girl," said Tyler, before all the girls on the team turned to look at him with angry faces.

* * *

 **Bridgette:** Looks like Zeke isn't the only one who has some sexist views.

 **Ezekiel:** How many times do I have to say I'm sorry?

* * *

"You should talk," said Kim accusingly.

"It was a warm up throw," said Tyler reassuringly, "look I can dominate this game, just give all the balls to me and we will win."

* * *

"Alright Noah," said an irritated Heather, "Your up."

"You know you guys did such an awesome job," Noah said in a rather insincere manner, "That I don't want to mess up your mojo." Heather looked incredulously at the book worm.

* * *

As the round began, it was Tyler, Jude, Bridgette, Katie, Sadie and Wyatt for the Bass, and Lindsey, Bojack, Leela, Owen, Trent, and Izzy for the Gophers. For some reason, Tyler was holding all four balls four the Bass. Tyler then began to spin like a top again. When he released the balls this time, they hit Chef, nearly hit Chris and the benched Gophers, and also slammed Lindsey in the face. While most of the Bass were happy with Tyler finally hitting someone, Tyler, surprisingly wasn't.

He rushed over to the downed girl, who asked him, "Tyler, how does my face look?" Her face currently had three giant welts covering it.

"Um, it looks good," said Tyler, trying to hide the obvious from the girl, "yeah, you can barely notice." As Tyler said this, Trent came up and hit him with a ball, thus taking him out of the competition. Tyler didn't care, as he then asked if Lindsey would like to go on a walk.

When asked this, Lindsey thought to herself, 'half to say no, have to say no,' before replying, "Okay!"

As Heather was chiding out Lindsey for being with Tyler, Owen became enraged at the injury to so many of his teammates. With a cry of "Game On," Owen grabbed all the balls on the Gopher side, and in quick succession, knocked out Sadie, Katie, Wyatt, Bridgette, and Jude. Jude's defeat; was particularly brutal. So brutal, in fact, that Chris some how showed an instant replay of it, several times.

The Gophers cheered for Owen as he returned to the bench. Owen, who was surprised by his own outburst, said, "I don't know what got into me."

Heather, who suddenly became angry, growled, "I'm glad someone is trying today." She was talking to Noah, who suddenly realized that the team was angry at him, let out a fake cheer, in an attempt, at least in his own mind, to appease the team.

* * *

 **Geoff:** I don't mind what Tyler did. He was trying his hardest. Plus, sometimes people do crazy things for love. Noah on the other hand, that guy is too much like Courtney for his own good.

* * *

"Hey fishies," taunted Heather, "how does it feel to realize that you're sending some one home tonight?" The Bass realized that their situation was desperate.

"Okay guys," said Geoff, "We need someone strong, someone mean, someone who will crush those darn gophers into the dirt!" All the members of the Bass looked at Duncan's sleeping form.

After several seconds of contemplation, D.J. said, "Nuh uh, no way, if we wake him up, he'll kill us."

"No," said Grim, "he wants to win this too, and he won't kill us, only wail on us so bad that we will be attached to a feeding tube for the rest of our miserable lives."

While this actually scared most of the Bass more, Harold agreed with Grim. He said, "I agree with Grim, we need Duncan's fierceness to win this challenge."

"That's the spirit," said Grim nodding his head, "now go wake him up."

"Why me?" asked a now fearful Harold.

"Are you kidding," said a near hysterical Grim, "If I wake him up, he'll kill me. Good luck though!"

"Plus," said Stan, "Out all of us, you're the most expendable one besides Morty."

"Okay, ouch." said Morty.

"Look," said Geoff, "theirs gotta be a way that we can wake Duncan up without getting to close to them. I have an idea. I heard in History that Teddy Roosevelt always said, 'speak softly, and carry a big stick.' "

* * *

The Bass did indeed follow Teddy's advice. They did stay completely silent, and they did indeed now possess a vey large stick, which they were attempting to poke Duncan with. They eventually did wake him up, by accidently sticking the stick in Duncan's nose. Duncan then grabbed then grabbed the stick and snapped it in half.

* * *

 **Harold:** (sarcastically) Thanks Teddy. Gosh!

* * *

Duncan then rushed up to Harold. "You better have a real good reason for sticking this up my nose nerd." Before Duncan could permanently damage Harold's face, Geoff jumped between the two.

"Look," said the annoyed Cowboy, "Were down two-to-nothing. I can appreciate that you need some sleep after that last challenge, but we need your help."

"Oh, and why should I help you all," said a rather smug Duncan.

'Because I'll freeze you solid if you don't," Rick threatened as he pointed his ray gun at the punk's forehead, making him sweat in fear.

"And also I can personally guarantee that you, not Harold, not Tyler, not Morty, not even Eva, but you will be going home tonight," said Geoff before adding a curt, "punk!"

Duncan glared a moment at the party boy before sighing. "Alright," Duncan said reluctantly, "I'll play. On one condition, you do what I say, when I say it."

Geoff smiled as he and the rest of the Bass nodded their heads, amazed at the courage of their leader had shown in the face of certain doom.

* * *

 **D.J.** : I got to tell ya, Geoff and Rick are so much braver than I am. They both stood up to Duncan like it was nothing.

 **Grim:** I like this Geoff. He is about as annoyingly happy as Billy, but he lacks the completely apparent stupidity. I mean, most people don't smile when I walk up to them, but he treats me like every one else. (Begins to cry) He is such a good person.

 **Jack:** I must say, Geoff does know when to lead. We needed someone to get Duncan to work with us, or else we would have been completely annihilated.

 **Heather:** Geoff is definitely a threat. Maybe I should steal his hat. He might go bonkers like Eva did.

 **Gwen:** ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

* * *

"Okay," said Duncan, addressing, his teammates, "Here's a strategy that I picked up in my first visit to Juvie. It's called rush the new guy."

XzZZZzttX

This time, the Bass members who were out on the court were D.J., Geoff, Kim, Jack, Ezekiel, and Duncan. For the Gophers, there was Izzy, Owen, Cartman, Fry, Beth, and Jonesy. When Chef blew the whistle for this round, the Bass quickly dodged several balls sent by the Gophers, before all six the members grabbed a ball.

All of the Bass quickly locked their sights on Owen. In one great barrage of red rubber, Owen was taken out of the competition, as the remaining Gophers stared in fear of the onslaught caused by the Bass's new strategy.

In quick succession, Leshawna, Cartman, Fry, Beth, and Jonesy were all eliminated from the challenge. This left Izzy as the only member of the Gophers left. Izzy, however, was greatly angered by the way the Bass were already celebrating. She suddenly grabbed a ball.

"No one messes with Izzy Kaleidoscope Fitz-Patrick!" shouted Izzy as she suddenly threw the ball in her hands, hitting Kim and taking the secret agent out of the challenge.

The Bass, shocked by this, grabbed the balls on their side and threw another salvo. Just as it appeared that Izzy was done for, she pirouetted out of the way of the on coming red balls of doom. As all the campers, Chef and Chris looked in shock at her gracefulness; Izzy grabbed another ball, and with pinpoint accuracy, nailed Ezekiel in the stomach. As the prairie boy walked to the sideline, the Bass prepared for another volley.

"Dude," said a nervous Geoff, "Are you sure this will work. She already dodged it once."

"Beginner's luck," explained Duncan before he felt an ominous presence in the room. Duncan then turned to the Gopher side of the court, not believing what he was seeing. For some odd reason, Izzy's whole body was covered in a shadow. All that was showing was two glowing yellow eyes, and a slightly more insane version of Chris's sadistic smile.

"Oh Duncan," Izzy said in a sickingly sweet voice, "your NEXT!" As Izzy shouted these words, somehow a giant fireball appeared behind her, giving her the appearance of a person who controlled the fiery forces of hell. It was possibly Geoff who phrased the thought of all those who saw this occurrence best.

"You're so totally, fucked dude!"

Duncan's only reply was to wet his pants.

* * *

 **Andrew:** In case you're wondering, the reason I wasn't here today was because I was buying the St. Louis Battering Rams football team. Glad I picked this week too, I don't want to know what was so awful that it caused Chef and Chris to have to sleep with a night light for three straight days.

* * *

As the next group of the Bass's balls sailed by, Izzy dodged it matrix style. As the campers were continually stunned by Izzy's flexibility, Izzy picked up two balls, and threw them. The first hit Duncan in the face, causing him to have a bloody nose, due to his piercings. It was the second ball that did the true damage, as it was well aimed enough to hit Duncan in the place where no man wants to be hit. Let us all pray for the souls of those poor unborn children.

* * *

 **Heather:** Glad psycho horse beast switched to our team, or I honestly don't think any of us would survive.

 **Grim:** that girl even put the fear of death in me.

 **Rick:** Jesus Christ, that girl's a fucking psycho and that's saying a lot coming from me.

 **Cartman:** (eating out of box of crackers) Did you see her, all devil like and stuff- I mean she was like all-(suddenly stops, looks in box and screams as the Sloppy Joe monster came out and attached itself to his face again) get it off me, get it off me! GET IT THE FUCK OFF ME!

 **Gwen:** (blood, presumably from Cartman and monster completely cover the Out house where the Cam is) ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

 **Izzy:** How crazy was that huh! I just sometimes like to take my anger I build up out on people! This kind of thing runs in my family, like genius intellect, and psycho therapy! Hey, why is there all this blood in here?

* * *

As Duncan was carried to the sideline, Geoff, D.J., and Jack all formed a huddle. "Look," said Geoff, "we need a plan, or Izzy will do to us what no man wants done to them." They all cringed at the thought of what happened to Duncan. "So do either of you have any ideas."

"Give up and call it a day?" asked D.J. hopefully. He then looked embarrassed as Geoff glared at him.

"I have an idea," said Jack before whispering his plan to the others, who began to smirk.

"Come on," whined Izzy as she stood, waiting to begin another cycle of dodge, throw, and beat the crap out of who ever you hit.

The Bass lined up like they had before and exactly like before, they threw the balls together at the wild girl. When Izzy dodged again, the Bass groaned as she prepared to pick up another ball. As she bent down to pick it up however, she heard a whizzing sound. When she looked up to see what was going on, a rubber ball plastered her in the face.

"Dude," asked Kyle, who was shocked, "what in the hell did you just do?"

"You see my young friend," explained Jack, "I tricked Izzy into thinking we had used up all the balls on our side, and then, when she wasn't looking, I hit her with a ball I hid behind my back."

"Not bad," said Izzy as Chef gave the victory to the Bass, "but I just have one thing to say to you," Izzy then frowned and shouted, "CURSE YOU SAMURAI JACK!"

* * *

 **Izzy:** Looks like Izzy found herself a new rival. And seriously, what is this stuff, (she licks the wall) defiantly blood, mixed with (Pauses with a confused look) Chef's Sloppy Joe mix?

* * *

Noah, who had missed the whole match, thus luckily avoiding a large amount of mental scaring, began to chide his teammates. "Come on," he said, "pick it up people." He was answered with Izzy glaring at him in her Demon Form. This allowed Noah to receive his daily recommended amounts of mental scarring.

On the other side of the court, Harold had again been rebuffed for a position of the playing team. While Geoff comforted the geek, the next set of campers went out to meet the opponents on the court. This time both Jack and Izzy were resting as well, so both could be saved up for the final match.

"Okay," said a ticked off Heather, "not that Noah, here cares, but we can't lose another match. Wait a minute," she said as she looked around, "where is Lindsey?"

* * *

As Heather searched for Lindsey, she eventually came to the dock, where a canoe was lying on the side. When she heard giggling, Heather looked over the side, and was shocked to see Tyler and Lindsey sitting together.

"This is so against the rules," said Heather as Lindsey looked up at her.

"I'm sorry," said Lindsey fearfully, "I didn't mean it."

"Hey," said Tyler in a defensive fashion, "Why don't you just chill out."

"Why don't you," said Heather, as she raised the canoe over her head, "Dodge this."

The canoe crashed on Tyler, trapping him in the wooden vessel. With a weak "Ow," Tyler was forced to stay still and watch Heather drag Lindsey back to the game.

* * *

Lindsey was dragged by her alliance member to the bench, where she was told by Heather, "sit down, and stay there." Heather then turned to the rest of her teammates, and asked, "So how are we doing?" She was answered with Beth, the final member of the Gophers, getting knocked down by the same strategy that the Bass had used the last game. Apparently rush the newbie did work as long as there was no insane devil woman on the other side.

"Sports," said Noah, not looking up from his book, "Not my forte, remember."

"You know," said Heather angrily to Noah, "you could actually give it a shot, and pretend to care."

Noah looked impassively at the girl, before sighing and saying, "Fine, in the next round, I'll play."

As the Bass were cheering, Tyler arrived at his bench, holding his head. Jen noticed the boy's arrival, and asked, "Where were you?"

"No where," replied Tyler nervously.

"You were with that blonde gopher girl weren't you?" said Eddy with a scowl.

"No," he trembled under the glare, "maybe, so?"

"So," replied Duncan, who had since regained consciousness, "she could have been getting you to spill all of our weaknesses to her." At the very moment he said this, Lindsey was having what appeared to be a very interesting conversation with her own hand.

* * *

 **Stan:** In hindsight, there probably wasn't that much of a risk at all.

* * *

It was time for the final match. On the Gopher side, was Izzy, Owen, June, Gwen, Trent, and an annoyed Noah. For the Bass, it was Jack, Duncan, D.J., Peter, Homer and Geoff.

"Okay," said Chris, "Gophers Bass, let's dodge some balls."

When the game started, both teams began to ease into it. Though there were some balls being thrown, they were more or less just light tosses to see what the other team was planning.

"Hey Gwen," said Trent, "you doing okay?"

"Yeah," Gwen said exhaustedly, "I'm fine."

"Well," continued Trent, "Just tell me if you need anything, cause-Ow!" As Trent was saying this, a ball from the Bass side was thrown and smashed him in the face. When Gwen looked for the person who threw it, all she saw was Geoff whistling.

* * *

 **Geoff:** What, I threw a ball at Trent while he was talking to Gwen, that doesn't mean anything. (He suddenly looks confusedly at the camera) Does it?

* * *

Again there appeared to be a lay off in the game for a moment, even after several minutes, no one accept Trent was out. Geoff then noticed Harold sitting on the bench. The poor guy had only played in one game so far, and he had been humiliated. Geoff, Feeling sorry for the geek, walked up to Harold, and said, "Tag out!" before he slapped Harold on the shoulder, allowing him into the game. As Harold excitedly walked onto the field, several members of the Bass looked incredulously at Geoff.

"Get to the back princess," said Duncan as he eyed Geoff angrily.

* * *

 **Duncan:** If we lose, I'm going to vote for Geoff 'cause he should have cared more about winning than snore monster's feelings."

 **Geoff:** I knew how hard Harold wanted to prove himself. He feels he hasn't helped the team much since the Game started, so I decided that he deserves another chance to prove himself.

* * *

As D.J. and Gwen threw their balls, they some how hit each other, taking them out or the competition as well. While they were both upset that they were out, both were also glad that they were now able to avoid the worst of the carnage, as Izzy was now sufficiently angered to bring back her demon form. As Demon Izzy tm began her maniacal cackle, she grabbed four of the red rubber balls, and began to throw them at Homer. They all hit him in succession. First in the head, "Doh,", then in the stomach, "Doh!", then in the in the chest, "Doh!", and finally, as Izzy sadistically planed, in the crotch, "DOH!"

Peter, angry at the loss of his buddy, shouted, "Take this you bitch!" Unfortunately, Izzy simply dodged the ball and angrily stared at the fat man. She picked up all the balls on her side, and sent them flying at Peter's stomach. After being hit about a dozen times in the stomach, Peter did what any normal human being would do after being hit multiple times in the stomach. He threw up.

"Alright Peter, your first purge on the show," said Chris, "You guys have a five minute break while we clean the place up."

* * *

After Peter's vomit had been cleared, the match had started up again. Jack and Izzy began to have their one on one match, while Duncan took on the remaining Gophers and Harold was forced to the back of the court. Duncan was knocked out quickly by a salvo of red rubber coming from the Gophers.

Jack, however, was adeptly dodging every thing that Izzy threw at him. It did not take long for Izzy to grow tired of this. So, she quickly began grabbing other objects to throw at the samurai. Jack quickly began to dodge a seagull, a canoe, a chair, a bear, and even the kitchen sink. As Jack began to feel comfortable again, Izzy picked up another ball, and threw it. Jack appeared to dodge it again, and was shocked when chef's whistle blew, signifying he had been hit. Jack suddenly realized that his kimono had in fact been frayed by Izzy's ball, and that he was out because of this.

It was suddenly apparent to the entire room that the only one on the Bass who was still standing was Harold. The Gophers let out a great cheer at their sudden inevitable victory. Owen, who was holding four balls, said, "Sorry dude, but you have to go down."

"Good night Harold," moaned Duncan as he glared at Geoff.

Owen then threw all the balls at Harold, who to everyone's surprise, dodged, ducked, and danced his way out of the incoming red spheres of death. Everyone, from both sides of the court, was astonished.

"Time out!" shouted Kim as the Bass pulled Harold over to the sideline. As Harold drank some water, the others formed a circle to form a plan.

"Man that boys got dodge," said a rather impressed Duncan, "Where'd you learn to do that?"

"Figure skating," replied Harold.

"Harold," said Geoff, "That was awesome, but dodging isn't enough. If we have any chance of winning, you either need to throw someone out-"

"Which we all know you can't do," interjected Rick.

"-Or catch a ball," Geoff continued, "You think you can do it."

"Definitely," said Harold as he spat out the water in his mouth, spraying Tyler.

As Owen prepared another ball, Harold stepped out on the court again. When Harold was on the court, the game started again. Owen then wound up the ball, and with a cry of "Cowabunga," threw the ball at high speed towards Harold. It hit Harold in the chest, causing him to hit the back wall. This time however, instead of losing, Harold held onto the ball, thus causing Owen to be sent out and another camper to come in. Just as Jack got off his seat, Chris interfered.

"Sorry," said Chris, "but you must choose either Double D, Morty, or Courage."

"What!" shouted Duncan, before asking, "Why?"

"Neither of them has been in yet," said Chris, "plus I'm a sadist, I want to see them face their fears."

"Okay, fine Double D, get in their," said Grim, before realizing that said sock-hated boy was hiding behind D.J.

"No, I really don't need to be out there," said Double D as Duncan and Geoff dragged him out to the middle of the court.

"Why is this so bad?" asked Geoff, "This is no worse than jumping off a cliff."

As Double D was forced next to Harold, Noah just yawned, before, he easily tossed the ball in his hands in the air, so easily that Double D was somehow able to catch it. Granted it was caught in his mouth, but he caught it.

"What the hell do you think you're doing!" shouted an enraged Leela.

"I don't think you need me anymore," said Noah, "besides, don't tell me your scared of three nerds and a dog."

As the three remaining Bass stood in the middle of the court, Izzy was now more enraged than before. She then grabbed all the balls on the Gopher side of the field, and threw them at the Bass members. Harold, realizing he could not dodge all of the balls, knew he had only one course of action. He, with no concern for himself, pushed Courage and Double D out of the way. Harold and Morty who couldn't get out of the way in time was soon hit with several balls, signifying they were out.

Double D, who was now forced to face his great fear, picked up a ball. His arms were quivering. Leela also picked up a ball that had rebounded off Harold. They both threw their balls at the same time. While Double D was pulverized by the ball, somehow, he had gotten just enough strength behind it to hit Leela, knocking her out as well. When the Gophers noticed the matchup, they cheered again. There was no way that a dog could beat an opponent with such talent.

Courage looked scared, even when he was being encouraged by his teammates. He then turned to them and whimpered.

"Come on Courage," shouted Bridgette, "There must be something you can do."

As Courage pondered this, Bridgette asked loudly, "Come on, what can you do?"

This line sparked a memory that Courage had possessed since his last match. As the light bulb went on, he began to gather his breath. He then did what he learned he did best. He screamed.

"AAAAAHHHH!" Courage shouted as his screams forced all the campers, including Izzy to cover their ears. The screaming was so loud in fact that no one noticed when the roof began to crack. When they did notice, it was too late, as the piece of a fallen roof had landed on non other than Izzy, easily incapacitating her.

Courage, who had stopped screaming, simply picked up a ball and, very gently, hit Izzy in the head.

"The Killer Bass win again!" shouted Chris as the Bass leapt on the field, running to the pink dog and lifting him into the air.

"Gophers," said Chris, "What happened."

"What can I say," said Noah, "weak effort."

"Oh shut it Noah," said Gwen as she headed back to the Cabin to get some sleep before the ceremony.

* * *

 **Harold:** I guess I'm kind of a role model now, you know, leading a bass comeback and winning the MVC award. I'm sure people will now start asking me for my autograph.

 **Double D:** I actually knocked someone out, I did it. Take that stupid phobia.

* * *

Chris was now holding another plate of marshmallows, as he prepared to tell the Gophers who would be leaving. "Remember, if you don't receive a marshmallow, you can't come back, ever!"

"Okay, first up is Izzy,"

The girl cackled as she got up to receive her marshmallow.

"Gwen,"

The Goth girl also got up, and tiredly picked her Marshmallow up.

"Heather, Owen, Justin, Trent, Bart, Cody,"

These campers also picked up their marshmallows.

"Nikki, Jonesy, Brian, Stewie, Beth,"

Like the others, they also came up.

"Caitlin, Leshawna, Fry, Leela, Shake, and Early,"

They all ran up to Chris in order to grab their marshmallows.

"Kenny, Cartman, Bojack, Frylock, Meatwad, Rusty, Billy and Mandy,"

As these campers also ran up to grab their Marshmallows, the last two members of the Gophers that were up for elimination were Noah and Lindsey. While Lindsey looked nervous, Noah seemed completely confident.

"And the final Marshmallow goes to…"

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…Lindsey."

"What are you kidding me!" shouted Noah as Lindsey celebrated her survival. The other members of the Bass seemed to smile as Noah began to accept his fate.

"Alright," shouted Noah angrily, "see if I care! Good luck, because you just voted out the only one with any brains on this team. OW!" While he was ranting, the others, other than Owen and Ed, threw their marshmallows at the egg head.

"You need to learn a little thing called respect," said Leshawna, as she dusted off her hands before calling him a "turkey."

"Whatever," said Noah as he walked off, "I'm out of here."

* * *

"Alright," said Chris as he faced the camera, "so it wasn't the most dramatic campfire ceremony ever. But I still get paid, ha ha, bonus!"

"Actually," said Andrew, who had just arrived from St. Louis "That no lying clause in your contract said that you now have to forfeit a day's salary."

"Fuck." was Chris's response.

* * *

 _ **AN: Well, see you next chapter!**_


	5. Chapter 5

Chris: Last time on Total Drama Island. The campers were forced to play the classic game, of dodge-ball. Eva killed Kenny, Izzy became even more insane, and Peter vomited. A rivalry was formed when Jack managed to hit out Izzy, and who knows what that girl is planning to do to the guy. In the end, it was MVC Harold who led a come back that wasn't finished until Courage screamed his lungs out, which caused that roof to fall on Izzy. Lindsey also snuck off to talk to Tyler, but they were found out by Heather, who threw a canoe at the clumsy Jock. For being a lazy know-it-all, Noah was kicked out.

What will the next challenge be?

How far will Jack and Izzy's rivalry escalate?

And will Tyler and Lindsey be able to get together?

Find all this out, and more, now on Total Drama Island!

* * *

 _(Cue theme song)_

* * *

As the Gophers were returning to their cabin, they suddenly noticed that there was a campfire in the middle of the common ground between the cabins. The Bass were sitting around the fire, talking while they were cooking some hot dogs.

* * *

 **Peter:** Yeah, our reward was hot dogs. I mean come on. After what we went through, we should have at least gotten a better reward. This is a bigger rip off than when that giant chicken gave me a coupon that was expired. (Looks around for a second) Oh no clip, sorry, thought we had a clip. Aw damn it, I can't even do cutaway gags here. This sucks!

* * *

"So," Geoff asked as he turned to the Gophers, "Who'd you vote off?"

"That too-smart-for-his-own-britches Noah," said Leshawna in an annoyed tone.

"Glad too see that," Geoff commented, "That guy reminded me a little too much of Courtney."

"Well," said Double D, "We have plenty of hot dogs, want to join us?"

"I even swiped some dessert from chef's fridge," said Duncan as he pulled out a thing of Green gelatin with a gummy worm in the middle.

D.J. who was horrified, slapped the dessert to the ground, shouted, "Snake!"

"Dude, relax," said Cody," It's just a gummy worm," he continued as he pulled the candy bug out of the now smashed gelatin.

"Sorry for tripping," apologized D.J. before explaining, "Snakes just freak me out."

"I feel you," said Tyler before whispering, "Chickens give me the creeps, dude."

"Your afraid of chickens?" asked a shocked Gwen.

"Wow," chuckled Duncan, "That's really lame man."

* * *

 **Gwen:** So suddenly, everyone is having this big share fest by the fire. Like Beth went on and on about her mortal fear is being buried in bugs, Harold's afraid of Ninjas, Peter's scared of this giant chicken, Homer can't stand the thought of a donut being destroyed, Bender's fear is the number 666, and even Heather admitted to being scared by sumo wrestlers.

* * *

"What's my worst fear?" said Gwen before saying, "being buried alive, I have extreme claustrophobia."

"Flying," said Owen, "That's some crazy stuff man."

"Oh," said a petrified Izzy, "I would never go up in a plane. Never!"

"I'm scared of Hail," Geoff said, before explaining, "It's small, but deadly."

"Being left alone in the woods," Bridgette said sadly.

"Chuck Norris," Stewie said, "They say he's so tough, he has no chin under his beard, there is only another fist."

"Alligators," said Kenny, who had taken off his hood to reveal that he was actually blond.

"Bad hair cuts," said Sadie and Katie at the same time, and Lindsey and Caitlin quickly agreed as well.

"Having to defuse a time bomb under pressure," said Cody after several seconds of thought.

"Clowns," screamed Billy, "they want to take over the world, and they'll destroy us all to make it happen. Destroy us all! Destroy us all! Destroy us all! Destroy us all! Destroy us all! Destroy us all! Destroy us all! Destroy us all! Destroy us all! Destroy us all!" While Billy continued to scream this, the others just turned back to one another to discuss their fears.

"I don't have a fear," said Mandy.

"What about your fear of professional figure skaters?" asked Grim.

"It's not fear," said Mandy, "I just don't trust the way they spin."

* * *

 **Gwen:** Eddy's fear was seeing money be burned, Jen's scared of driving, Morty's scared of this jelly bean man, Brian is scared of vacuum cleaners, and Fry is scared of letting a soda called Slurm go to waste.

* * *

"Dudes," said Stan, "I'm scared of Jason Voorhees."

"No way dude," said Kyle, "Freddy Krueger is the scariest."

"You're both wrong," said Cartman, "Michael Myers is the scariest."

Courage, to explain his fear, put his paw in the ground, and spelled out the word, 'Katz'.

"Dude," laughed Duncan, "a dog who is afraid of a cat, that's weak."

"Well what's your greatest fear Duncan," asked Trent.

"Celine Dion standees," mumbled Duncan.

"Dude, how weak is that," laughed Ron, before Duncan grabbed him by the shirt.

"Okay, Stoppable, what's your fear."

"Monkeys," said Ron, "Bad experience at summer camp."

"Losing," admitted Eva as she looked down in shame. Several of her teammates looked at her questioningly.

* * *

 **Kim:** You really shouldn't be that obsessed with winning, everyone loses once in a while.

* * *

"I'm really freaked out by mimes," said Trent, "all that weird make up, and they don't talk."

* * *

 **Gwen:** Jude's scared of suits, Jonesy is afraid of pepper spray; Justin's afraid of being ugly, Wyatt's can't stand the thought of rap, and Nikki won't even talk about her fear of wearing dresses.

* * *

"Soap!" Ed screamed as he hid under a stump, "Evil, slippery, elixir bad for Ed, Eddy!"

Double D contemplated his answer for a moment before saying, "being stuck in mud, all that disgusting glop getting in my clothes, yuck!"

"That's not as bad as taking on a mad bear, eh," said Ezekiel as many of the others nodded. Leela glared at the sock-hat boy.

* * *

 **Leela:** I can't believe I lost to a wimp like him. I mean, at least my fear of giant bees has some merit. Haven't you heard that they kill more people per year than sharks do?

* * *

"My greatest fear is that a giant sewer rat will come and eat me," said Dib.

"Where I come from," said Jack, "There are stories of a great fiery demon, with black skin, named Aku. Aku is my greatest fear."

* * *

 **Harold:** Any one besides me notice the similarity between Aku and Demon Izzy.

 **Izzy:** Wow, this Aku guy sounds like someone who I'd like to meet. I hear if you rip a demon's heart out, and eat it, you gain their powers, and I'd love to be master of darkness.

 **Gwen:** Leshawna revealed her fear of spiders, Bojack is afraid of no one remembering him, Grim said he lives his worst fear every day of his life, and Kim said her greatest fear is lighting. After that, the Bass were out of hot dogs, so we went to bed.

* * *

It was morning again at Camp Wawanakwa, and all of the campers were, at least trying, to eat breakfast. Chris suddenly whistled loudly at them.

"Campers,' he said, "Today's challenge is a little game I like to call, Phobia Factor!"

"Saw that *burp* coming a mile away," Rick said with sarcasm in his voice, "What a hack."

* * *

 **Andrew:** Chris has no idea how much money it took for me to pay off Fear Factor so they wouldn't sue the show. He owes me big time for this one.

* * *

"Prepare to face your worst fear!"

"Worse than this," said a disgusted Leshawna as she held up a moldy sausage.

"Gwen," said Chris evilly, "You, me, the beach, and a couple of tons of sand." Gwen looked shocked as she realized she was about to be buried alive.

"Wait," asked Lindsey, as even Heather looked shocked at what was about to happen, "how did they know that being buried alive was your worst fear."

Gwen suddenly slapped her head, "Because we told them," she explained.

When Lindsey and Beth looked confused, Trent explained, "Remember, we said what all of our worst fears were last night."

"Wait, they were listening to us?" asked Lindsey fearfully.

"It's a reality show Einstein, their always listening to us," said Bojack in an exasperated voice.

"Chef," said Chris, "Didn't you make a special dish for Tyler this morning." Chef smiled evilly as he tossed a drumstick at Tyler, who leapt out of his seat and hid behind D.J.

"Don't worry guys;" said Chris, "This challenge will be good for you. Let's now go test Beth, I hope she likes bugs."

* * *

Chris indeed had filled a small blow up pool with insects. As the other campers looked on in disgust, Beth was forced to enter the pool. She dived under the surface, and after a few seconds, she came up smiling. As the gophers cheered, a point was added to the Gophers.

"Well Beth has set the bar way high," said Chris approvingly. He then shouted, "Lindsey, Caitlin, Sadie, Katie, and Justin come into the lodge for a moment, please!"

* * *

Chris had placed rather horrific wigs on the girls. They were all cringing at their sight in the mirror. Justin was forced to wear a mask, that was coved with pimples, had a mono-brow, and, to top it all off, buck teeth.

"You guys will have to wear these things for the rest of the day," Laughed Chris as Justin broke down into tears.

* * *

 **Justin:** I've always gotten by because of my looks, now though, (Bursts into tears) I look like a Star Trek nerd!

* * *

Both Izzy and Owen were standing in front of a plane that appeared to have been made of scrap parts found in the junk yard. It did not even have landing wheels. It had skis. What the two noticed however, and what they feared the most, was Chef, who was their pilot. It might not have been so bad had it not been for the female flight attendant outfit he was wearing. When the two were finally coaxed into the plane, it took off with their screams being heard for miles around.

* * *

As Harold sat on the toilet, he heard a strange noise. When he opened the toilet door, he was met with no one, not two, but three ninjas. All three of the masked warriors glared at the lanky nerd. But Harold had expected an attack form these sneaky enemies. He looked nonchalantly at them before pulling out his secret weapon, the nunchaku. The 'ninjas' stared in horror as the nerd performed an unprecedented amount of moves. Just as they were about to run, Harold accidently hit himself on the head, knocking him out of the competition, and possibly worse, into the toilet. The 'ninjas' let out sighs of relief, as they would not have to fight the apparent martial arts master in front of them.

* * *

The Gophers looked on as Leshawna, one of their strongest members, ran away screaming from a giant spider. They might have been more understanding were it not for the fact that it was obviously Chef in a spider costume.

* * *

Heather was to face off against a sumo on a stage on the opposite side of camp from the cabins. As the sumo charged at the girl, she bent down in a fetal position. This, some how allowed Heather to cause the Sumo to trip over her, winning her a point for her team.

After Heather stepped off the stage, D.J. was forced on. In front of him was a tiny little garden snake. As D.J. fearfully looked at the snake, the little thing looked up at him, smiled, and then blinked. D.J. screamed as he backed away from the itty bitty reptile.

Kim could not help but chide the linebacker, "It's the smallest snake ever! Pick it up!"

"Yeah," said Peter, as he decided to add his own two cents, "If you don't do this you'll be more humiliated than- Oh crap." The contestants in the stands, suddenly followed Peter's line of sight to, what appeared to be a very large, humanoid, chicken. The chicken glared at Peter, and, without warning, lunged at the fat man.

Peter quickly punched the giant fowl until he let go. Then, as he began to run away, he grabbed a branch, and he pulled it back. When the Chicken came towards him, he released it, causing it to hit the Chicken in the face. After a several second reprieve, the chicken was up again, and the two began a fist fight. As they fought, they went through the forest. Woodland creatures ran away at the sight, as trees fell where the two fought.

Finally, their fight had reached the cliff. As they fought on the side, Chicken managed to pin Peter down. Just as Chicken began to strangle him, Peter kicked Chicken in the rear, causing the fowl to fall head over heels into the lake. Just as Chicken shook his fist at Peter, shark fins began to circle around him. Soon Chicken was dragged under water, as blood began to cover the surface of the water. As Peter walked back to camp, however, a yellow feathered fist shot out of the lake.

When Peter returned, covered in scars and bruises, D.J. became at the same time motivated and frightened. He felt that if Peter could go through such a beating, so should he. On the other hand, look how bad Peter had been hurt.

Suddenly Bridgette shouted out, "Don't worry D.J., I know you can do it, I believe in you!" D.J. was shocked. Bridgette believed in him, he couldn't let her down. Slowly, D.J. reached his hand out, and picked up the snake. The Bass cheered as D.J. lifted the snake in the air. As it was now, the score was now in favor of the Bass 3-2.

* * *

"Um, Mr. Mclean," asked an Intern, "are you sure this is wise."

This intern, and two of his fellow interns, had in fact been the ninjas that Harold had nearly knocked out before. Now their host was demanding that they were costumes of Jason Voorhees, Freddy Krueger, and Michael Myers. They were already frightened by their previous encounter, and began to question the sanity of attacking campers who had already gone through so many traumas.

Chris was not listening at all, "I can't believe you all! The guys you have to scare are nine year olds for Pete's sake." The interns still looked unsure, before Chris said, "If you don't do it, you don't get paid."

The three were quickly running out of the tent door.

* * *

Jack had easily passed his challenge, having wisely just removed the mask from Chef, before he gave the giant of a man the beating of a lifetime. Dib was not so lucky, because AJ inc. just so happened to possess a giant lab rat, that chased the large headed boy out of the stadium. Homer was up next for the Bass, as he suddenly saw a donut descend downward from a helicopter.

"Yum," said Homer, before he started to scream as he saw it was headed toward a container of acid. Homer, despite the pleading of his teammates, jumped to save the donut, before he began to gobble it down.

"Dude," said Chris, "That has got to be the weakest performance so far."

* * *

 **Geoff:** You idiot! It was just a donut!

 **Homer:** (has sprinkles on his face from donut) Mmm...donut.

* * *

Tyler also proved to be less than reliable, when he was required to get in a chicken pen, he quickly slid into the fetal position. Ron didn't have an easy time either; he was thrown around like a rag doll by the monkey he'd been wrestling. Stewie, who was in shorts, and holding boxing gloves, was forced into the ring where Ron had just been defeated.

"What the hell man!" shouted the baby, "You honestly can't expect me to box Chuck Norris!"

"Look little dude," said Chris, "all you have to do is last one minute in the ring with him."

"Don't worry Stewie," said Harold, "It's probably just an intern dressed like Chuck Norris."

Unfortunately, Harold was wrong, as Chuck Norris, in full boxing décor, stepped into the ring. Before Stewie could even raise his hands in defense, Chuck unleashed a flurry of punches. After knocking Stewie down, as well as knocking out several of his teeth, Chuck finished the baby off with one final right hook in the head, sending the Baby rocketing out of the ring.

* * *

 **Gwen:** How'd this show even get Chuck Norris to come participate?

 **Chuck Norris:** (counting a wad of money)

* * *

"Man I hate static electricity," said Kim. Her hair was standing on end. She had been unable to avoid the lighting in her challenge, and was still experiencing mild shocks.

"Not as bad as oil slicks," said Jen. She had crashed the car she was driving to face her fear. The Volkswagen beetle was completely totaled, and was now being sold for scrap.

"I hate wearing suits," said Jude. The suit he had been assigned was already gone, thus costing the Bass another point.

They were currently watching Courage, who was standing on a tennis court, opposite of a tall, red cat. They were both dressed in tennis outfits.

"Ready for a little sport before dying, dear boy," the cat spoke in a suave, sophisticated manner. Katz served the ball, as Courage returned it. After a while, it was obvious that Katz was winning, as his legs were longer than courage, thus giving him more reach. Finally, the ball came up and hit Courage in the head, knocking him out.

Katz then walked up to the pink dog, with a dagger. Just as he chuckled evilly, the security guards placed around camp captured him and dragged him to a police car. Kim, while happy that Courage would be okay, suddenly asked, "How did a car get on an island?"

* * *

Jonesy had managed to get through a room full of pepper spray, but he was now unconscious from the affects of the fumes. Nikki had gone for her allotted hour in a dress with no problem. Wyatt was not so lucky, after only listening to half a song from 16 cents; he had smashed the boom box. This brought the score in favor of the Gophers, 4-3.

Bridgette was stuck alone in the woods, and was forced to remain there for 6 hours. She appeared to be doing fine, until a chipmunk came up to her. Bridgette let out a scream, before sending the cute little thing in to stratosphere. It land in the lake, near where a large amount of the still conscious campers were standing.

Gwen was being buried in a Plexiglas case under a large amount of sand. She only had a small hatch that allowed her to talk with the others while this was occurring. Trent bent down to try to comfort her.

"There's enough air for an hour," said Trent, "You only need to stay in there for five minutes."

"As long as we decide to dig you up," Chris interjected.

"Not funny Chris!" shouted Gwen.

"Sheesh," said Chris, "Take a chill pill."

Trent handed Gwen a walkie talkie to Gwen through the hatch, "Just yell if you panic, and I'll dig you right up," he said.

"Goodbye cruel world," said Gwen as the dirt began to cover her ability to see.

* * *

"Dudes," said Stan, "We need to be very careful about what we do; Chris might try something with our fears at any moment."

Stan, Kyle, and Cartman were currently watching as a cage, which contained Kenny, was being lowered into the lake. Kenny did posses a scuba suit, and he and the cage were soon under water. Kenny's challenge was too stay under the water, with crocodiles circling the cage. It was not long, until the crane holding the cage began to rumble. As the cage was pulled up again, it was shown that there had been a giant bite taken out of it, and Kenny was no where to be seen.

"Oh my God!" shouted Stan, "They killed Kenny!"

"You Bastards!" shouted Kyle.

Kenny had gone into the water, so technically he had still completed the challenge, so another point was added to the Gopher's score. While the fourth graders were watching their friend die, again, the interns dressed like their most dreaded horror film icons, had snuck behind them, and jumped out.

The boys screamed, as the backed up onto the dock as Freddy, Jason, and Michael approached them. Cartman then became calm.

"Good thing I hid this for just such an occasion," he said as he pulled up a board on the dock, revealing a shot gun. He then shouted, "DIE you motherfuckers!" letting loose a barrage of buck shots.

* * *

 **Chris:** (reading from a paper, in a rather forced tone) TDI would like to apologize to the families of John, Patrick and Henry. They will be missed. (Tosses the paper away) You also can't sue us; getting killed by crazed campers was listed as us not being liable in their contracts. Good thing we have plenty more interns.

* * *

"Die clown!"

Speaking of more interns, one had been forced to dress as a clown, and was given the task of scaring Billy. Needless the say, Billy, while scared of clowns, had learned that the best way to deal with his fear of clowns; was to beat the crap out of them. His planned tool of said beating, a baseball bat.

As Billy chased the intern, Mandy had completed a routine as a figure skater. When she was finished, she walked up to Chris, grabbed him by the collar, and gave him a black eye. The score was now 7-5 in favor of the Gophers.

Another intern was dressed as a jelly bean in order to scare Morty, but the results were the exact opposite of what was intended as Morty flew into a blind rage and proceeded to beat the holy shit out of the intern.

* * *

Two minutes had now passed, and Trent was smiling as Gwen was talking to him. Gwen was still nervous however. "Trent, could you tell me why you're scared of mimes?" she asked.

Trent sighed, "My mom took me to this carnival once when I was four so I could see the elephants," as Trent said this, he failed to realize a strange being was coming up behind him, "I was so excited that I lost her for a moment, and when I looked back, all I saw was this horrible white face with evil black lips pretending to be me."

Trent then heard a noise; he turned and saw a mime. Said mime was doing the classic invisible wall routine. Trent screamed, as he began to run from the silent menace.

"Trent," said Gwen, "what's going on up there? Trent? Trent!"

As Trent ran by Chris, with the mime still chasing him, Chris turned to Cody and revealed to him he would now have to defuse a time bomb.

* * *

The time bomb was actually just a pile of garbage, which were tied to explosives. As Cody cringed at the sight, Chris explained the challenge to him.

"Alright Cody," said Chris, "this garbage bomb is going off in exactly ten minutes," he held up some blueprints, "everything you need to know is on these schematics. See you in ten minutes." Chris smiled evilly as he left a shocked Cody in his wake.

* * *

As Trent continued to face his opposing mime, several others had also gone threw their fears. Leela had endured being covered by a swarm of bees for thirty seconds. Fry, however was unable to let any Slurm get dumped into the lake and quickly drank the entire barrel. Eddy had refused to set fire to a five dollar bill, Ed had refused to take a soapy bath, and Brian had run away from the vacuum cleaner. Bojack, unfortunately almost suffered a nervous breakdown when he did his challenge, making the campers wonder what exactly happened to the horseman to make him react that way. As Duncan was about to enter his challenge, the Gophers held a solid lead of 7-5.

Duncan was now faced with having to hug a Celine Dion cut out. Eventually, after some well timed chiding by Harold, he hugged the cardboard singer. The Bass let out a cheer, as they were now closer to their goal.

* * *

The plane Izzy and Owen were in had finally come down, and as it landed, the two jumped out of it and began to kiss sweet mother earth. Chef shook his head at the campers.

"They would have never lasted in the war," he said. Behind him, the wings of the airplane fell off.

* * *

Trent had been forced to the edge of the dock, trapped by the mime. Just as the mime approached him, Trent jumped into the water, realizing it would help him. Just as the mime prepared to follow the music man, Trent laughed. "You can't come in here," he said, "Your make up will run." The mime, realizing Trent was right, sullenly walked away, never to be seen again.

As the mime passed Chris, Chris could not help but cringe at the strange clown. "Good job Trent," said Chris, as he held up a remote control, "Let's see how things are going for Geoff."

* * *

Geoff was calmly sitting of the beach in a lounge chair. Geoff was sure that he was safe. There was no way in hell that Chris, despite his sadism, could come up with a way to make it hail. He was so relaxed, that he failed to notice an oncoming dark cloud. When the cloud was completely over his head, it began to rain hail on the cowboy. Geoff began to scream as the hail hit his head. When he tried to run from it, it seemed to follow him. As the campers watched this, Lindsey said, "Look that cloud is following him. It's like his own baby cloud. Here cloudy cloud!"

As the evil water vapor continued to hunt Geoff, Chris couldn't help smile as he controlled it with his remote. Trent saw this and asked, "Can you make the cloud go lower, and pelt him harder?" Trent did want some revenge for dodge-ball.

"You are one sick dude," said Chris, "but, yeah." The two shared a sadistic smile as the cloud now covered Geoff's head.

Due to the cloud now being so low, Geoff could not see where he was going, so he accidently tripped over a rock. This rock just so happened to be the timer for Gwen's challenge. When Geoff looked at it, he saw that over twenty minutes had past. He could also here Gwen's screams through the walkie talkie.

"Oh no!" he shouted, "Gwen!" Geoff grabbed the shovel next to the mound where Gwen was buried. He began to ignore the hail as it poured down on him. He didn't stop until he saw the latch and pulled the door to the container open. As Chris pulled the cloud away, Geoff pulled up a hyperventilating Gwen. She, accidently thinking he was Trent, hit him in the head with a walkie talkie. Luckily, both had completed their challenges.

* * *

 **Gwen:** Yeah, Maybe I should have looked to see who was digging me up before I threw it.

 **Geoff:** (Holds ice pack on head) I'm going to kill Chris for that stupid hail cloud. But revenge is a dish best served with ice cream. (Realizes his mistake) I mean cold; revenge is a dish best served cold. Stupid hail, hit me so much it's making me think incoherently.

* * *

"I hate you Chris Mclean!" shouted Ezekiel as he walked out of a bear cave with dozen's of scars covering his body, "It's insane to force someone to give a bear a Wet Willy, eh!"

Even with Ezekiel's courage, the Bass still had a large mountain to climb. When the girls took off their wigs, and Justin his mask, the Gopher's lead was now 14-9. Cody's bomb had gone off, and he was now walking like a zombie, through the woods. This coincidentally, cost Bridgette her challenge because she saw the now zombified Cody and ran. Just as Cody walked up, D.J. decked him when Bridgette pointed to the now unrecognizable Cody, while she was screaming.

* * *

 **D.J.:** I should have probably waited a little longer before resorting to physical violence.

 **Bridgette** : That was really sweet of D.J. to do that. Though I do have to feel a little sorry for Cody.

* * *

Double D could not believe his predicament. This show had already forced him to jump off a thousand foot high cliff, as well as play the game he hated most. Now they were expecting him to dive into a giant tub of mud, from 30 feet up. His teammates were egging him on.

"If you don't do this!" shouted Wyatt, "we'll lose the challenge."

"Actually," said Cody who was holding a calculator, an ice pack covering his left eye, "it's mathematically impossible for you to win." To prove his point, he held up the highest possible point spread, which included Double D and Eva facing their fears. The score would be 16-11.

"Well," said Chris slyly, "Why don't we make things interesting? If Double D and Eva complete their challenges, they will be each rewarded four points. So, if they actually do face their fears, the Bass will win, 17-16."

"What!" shouted Stewie, who had an ice pack attached to his head, "That is so unfair! I mean I boxed Chuck Norris for God's sake, and I don't get a point, but all they have to do is jump in some mud and lose a card game and they get eight."

"Hey, I host the show, I make the rules," said Chris, "And if Double D does jump, it won't be a card game Eva has to lose."

Double D was horrified. Now he was expected to jump, and if he didn't, he would surely be eliminated. He began to resign himself to defeat, before thinking about how the other kids in the cul-de-sac would react to him giving up because of some mud. Double D then began to become infuriated, as he imagined how they would laugh at him. They would call him names; Double Dork, Double Dweeb, and others. In a moment of blind fury, he ran over the diving board, and belly flopped into the pool of mud below. As the Bass cheered, the Gophers began to sulk. There was no way that Eva would not complete her challenge.

"Now," said Chris, "all Eva must do is lose an arm wrestling match." The Bass let out a cheer, before Chris continued, "To Cody!" "Wait a minute," said Cody, "If I win, won't my team just kick me off."

"Not to worry Cody," Chris said, "If you win, you will still win immunity for yourself, but, you will also be rewarded with a new high speed computer."

The Bass continued to celebrate, as the nerd and the muscular girl sat down, and their arms locked for battle. As planned, Cody was winning the challenge, but as he pushed down on Eva's hand, it was easy to tell, that it was difficult for him to do, even with the thought of a new high speed computer as his reward. Eva began to grow frustrated. This was ridiculous, if she lost to this nerd, what would the members at her gym think? Eva, slowly began to push back, and was soon in a winning position. As her team screamed for her to throw the game, Eva slammed Cody's arm on the table, causing the computer nerd to cringe.

As Eva threw her hands up in victory, the Gophers let out a cheer. They had won; they were all safe that night. The Bass glared at Eva, as she suddenly realized that she had just cost the Bass their chance to win three in a row.

"I would like to extend my sincere admiration, as well as this MVC award," said Andrew, "to Gwen, because she went through four times the amount of torture that she had to." Gwen smiled as her teammates lifted her up into the air.

"Well," said Gwen, "At least I got something out of being buried alive."

"Alright," said Chris, before turning to the losing team, "Killer Bass, See you at the campfire tonight."

* * *

 **Kim:** You've been a negative influence on this team for far too long. If we are going to continue to win, you have to go. I vote Eva

 **Jude:** Dude, you couldn't even stay in a chicken pen, so I have to vote you off. Sorry Tyler.

 **Geoff:** You couldn't even keep yourself from eating a donut! That's why I'm voting for you Homer.

* * *

The campfire ceremony was already well under way. As Chris called Peter's name, Homer, Eva, and Tyler were all that was left. One of them would be going home tonight.

"None of you completed your dares, so I can understand why you all received votes," said Chris as he picked up the second to last marshmallow.

The second to last marshmallow goes to…

…

…

…

…

…Homer!"

Geoff glared at the yellow man as he caught the marshmallow in his mouth, and savored its taste.

"And, the final marshmallow of the night goes to…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…Tyler!"

Tyler shouted in joy as he caught the marshmallow. As several of his teammates patted him on the back, all happy to see such an enthusiastic person stay, Eva blew up.

"Like I really needed you guys any way!" shouted Eva, "I hope you realize you just lost one of your strongest players!" As Eva walked onto the dock, she kicked Chris hard in the shin, causing him to fall to the ground holding his leg.

When she had finally gotten on the Boat of Losers, Eva began to speak to the camera, "I guess I let my temper get the better of me, again. But you know what, they'll have a much tougher time winning challenges without me there to bolster them, you'll see."

* * *

Geoff was sitting on a lounge chair, out on the dock, as he looked out on the lake. Geoff was thinking about how they had just lost another challenge, and how the Bass's situation was now far more in Jeopardy. He suddenly saw someone walk up behind him, and turned around to see the person.

"Oh," said a relieved Geoff, "Hey Gwen."

"Hey Geoff," said the Goth, before asking, "what are you doing out here?"

"Oh, you know, thinking," said Geoff, before turning back to the lake.

"I just wanted to say thanks for digging me up earlier," said Gwen before admitting in an ashamed tone, "and that I'm sorry that I hit you with the walkie talkie."

"Oh," said Geoff, "it's no problem at all. I'm just thinking about how we lost today," before acquiring a playful smirk, "and how the Bass are going to rebound next time."

"Not if the Gophers beat the Bass down," said Gwen in an equally playful tone. They both laughed, before they returned to their cabins.

* * *

 _ **AN: That's all for now.**_


	6. Chapter 6

Chris: Last time on Total Drama Island. The campers were forced to face their worst fears, in Phobia Factor. While some, like Jack, Morty, and Double D were able to face their fears, others, like Jude, Ron, and Homer were unable to complete several easy tasks. When it came time for the Bass to vote off their camper, they chose Eva, who had been unable to lose a simple arm wrestling match.

The real action though happened when Geoff and Gwen faced their fears. Gwen, who had been abandoned by Trent, because he had been scared off by a mime, was suffering from extreme claustrophobia. Geoff, who was being chased around by a hail cloud, being controlled by yours truly, tripped over her timer, and even though he was being buried in hail, he still managed to dig her up. They would then meet on the dock after the elimination, and promised to make the competition even harder.

How will we milk this new friendship/relationship?

Who will be voted off next?

And will we see demon Izzy and the Sloppy Joe monster again?

Find out now, on Total Drama Island!

* * *

 _(Cue theme song)_

* * *

"Campers," Chris said as he and all 56 remaining campers stood out in the campfire pit, "Today's challenge will test your outdoor survival skills. I am not going to lie to you; some of you might not come back alive."

When he said this, some looked at Chris with fear, others with annoyance, and some, (coughIzzycough) with pure excitement. Chris then threw two maps, and two compasses to the teams. "Your challenge is to spend one night in the woods. Your camps will have everything you need; you just have to find them. Oh and watch out for bears, we lost a couple of interns in pre-production. Okay, first ones back for breakfast, win invincibility, as well as a nice vacation after the trip, to a famous Yellowstone lodge."

"Did he really just say that bears are out there?" asked Leshawna fearfully.

"I had a little encounter with a bear once," said a rather smug Owen, "let's just say his head looks real nice up on my mantle."

"Oh," said Izzy, "You killed a bear too, wow. That is cool, but did you kill it with your bare hands." As this conversation was going on, both teams advanced into the great unknown.

* * *

"Sadie look," said Katie pointing to a bush. She and Sadie were in the back of the line, and as they stopped, the rest of the Bass continued along towards their camp. She eventually pointed out what she had seen, "blueberries."

"I love, love, love blueberries," Sadie exclaimed happily.

"Oh my gosh, me too," said Katie.

* * *

 **Katie:** Me and Sadie have been friends for our whole live. We even had the chicken pocks together. We were so upset when we weren't put on the same team, but thanks to Izzy, we are back together.

* * *

Heather was glaring at Gwen, who was walking in front of the rest of the Gophers. "She is so the next one to leave," Heather said icily.

"Who?" asked Trent.

"Goth girl," Heather said as though it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"Why Gwen?" asked Leela, "It's not like she's done any thing wrong."

"Yes she did," said Heather, "last night she was out on the dock, talking to Geoff."

"She was probably just thanking him for digging her up," said Jonesy, "she wouldn't have even done it if Trent hadn't been so distracted by a mime."

"Just shut up," Heather said as she turned around and ignored her teammates.

* * *

 **Leela:** I don't like Heather. I think the only reason she wants Gwen gone is because of her appearance. Gwen's actually a great person to be around with, she is nice, and she does what she is asked. I kind of admire her. She is a much better leader than Heather is.

* * *

"Can you believe how yummy those were?" asked Katie as they sat down after eating all the blueberries from the bush.

"They were so yummy," Sadie agreed, before looking around, noticing she couldn't see the other Bass members, "Katie, where is the rest of the team?"

"I don't know," Before shouting," Killer Bass, where are you?"

XzZZZzttX

The Gophers had arrived at their campsite, and found tents, flint for fires, and sleeping bags. There was one thing that they all noticed was not available.

"Where's the food!" shouted Owen.

"This is a survival task Einstein," said Bojack, who was holding the map, "The instructions say were supposed to find our own food."

Heather looked around their campsite for a moment, before saying, "I still don't see it."

"I think they mean in the woods," chuckled Trent.

"I'll go," said Owen, "I'm good at finding food."

"Count me in!" shouted Izzy before heading in an opposite direction, so they would be able to acquire more.

"Well," said Cartman as he was pulling on a rope that held the supplies together, "we might as well unpack, that way- Oh my god, not that fucking thing again!" the Sloppy Joe Monster, which was hiding in one of the tents, jumped out and grabbed hold of Cartman's face. As Cartman began running around, screaming bloody murder, Brian grabbed a dead branch off the ground, and began to hit the monster. While this did force the evil sandwich creature to let go, it also had caused a great amount of damage to Cartman's face. The others went about unpacking the supplies, as Cartman laid down, groaning in pain.

* * *

"You don't even know where we are, do you?" asked Sadie as Katie tried to guide them to their camp.

"No," said Katie, "All the trees look the same."

"Oh," said Sadie in a disgruntled manner, "I should have known not to trust you."

"Are you saying I'm not smart enough to find them?" Katie asked angrily.

"Well," said Sadie as she emptied the grains of sand out of her shoe, "You're not exactly the best with directions."

"Yes I am," said Katie.

"No your not," said Sadie, "Because we are now L-O-S-T. Lost!" Katie blew a raspberry at her chubby friend.

* * *

"Oh," said Heather as she and the other Gophers waited for Izzy, and or Owen to return, "I am so hungry."

"Yo!"

The Gophers turned to see a guy in a pizza delivery out fit standing near their camp. "Who ordered the pepperoni, with extra cheese?" The camera man suddenly waved to the delivery boy.

"It's for the camera crew," he said.

"What the hell man?!" shouted Stewie as the camera crew began to eat the cheesy meal.

"Wait, how did a pizza van get on an island?" asked Bojack.

The Gophers suddenly heard rustling behind them and turned to see Owen return with a large amount of fish.

My Grandpa taught me how to fish," said Owen proudly, as he handed the scaly swimmers to Trent.

* * *

The Bass had just arrived at their camp, and quickly realized they were missing a few members.

"Where the heck are Katie and Sadie?" asked Grim.

"They must have fallen behind, eh," said Ezekiel.

"Well," said Duncan nonchalantly, "The wolves will eat well tonight."

"Duncan!" shouted Geoff before turning to the rest of the campers, "Alright, here's the plan. Me, Jack, D.J., Bridgette, Morty, Duncan, and Courage will go out and search for the girls, and hopefully bring back some food as well. The rest of you will set up the tents, start the fire, and try to keep from being eaten by bears."

* * *

"Well at least I know how to drive," said Katie as they wandered aimlessly through the woods.

"Trip to the beach last year rings a bell," retorted Sadie, "You drove my mom's car into a snack shack."

Two squirrels, which had been collecting nuts, stopped to listen to the conversation. They both began to mimic the girls as they talked, taunting the unknowing teens.

"If it wasn't for me," Katie said, "you'd have to walk to the mall."

"Well if it wasn't for me," replied Sadie, "you wouldn't even be able to find your way to the mall."

"Oh, I know my way to the mall," said an infuriated Katie.

"You lean on me," said Sadie, "If it wasn't for me, you wouldn't even be on this show."

"You're just saying that 'cause I'm prettier than you," scoffed Katie. The twins then began to hurl insults at one another, as the squirrels in the tree laughed at their foolishness. The two friends continued to argue as they walked, unaware of their surroundings.

* * *

Jack was currently searching for the twins. While searching, he carved an X into the tree's he passed, so he would now where to return to. He had already been searching for half an hour, when he heard something rustle in the woods. Jack, with superior reflexes, jumped out of the way as a dark creature landed where he had previously been standing. As Jack readjusted himself, he quickly recognized his attacker. Part of him could not help but quake in fear as Demon Izzy let out an evil cackle.

"So we meet again, Samurai Jack," said the now demonic girl, "but this time, no dog will be able to save you." As she said this, she pulled out her weapon. Harold wasn't the only one to wield nunchaku. In defense, Jack pulled out his katana, and slipped into a fighting stance. The two warriors then jumped at each other, their weapons moving in lighting quick movements. The fight was up in the air, who would win this battle of titans!

* * *

 **Chris:** I can't believe that there is already a Demon Izzy fan club. Since she showed up, our ratings have gone through the roof. But, seeing as some of our viewers might want to see something other than violence, we will now show this adorable scene that was occurring about the same time.

* * *

While the samurai and wild girl were duking it out, the others were also searching for the lost girls. D.J. and Courage were accompanying Bridgette, who was too afraid to go out on her own. As they walked, the two came to a clearing. In the clearing was a small pond, as well as an apple tree, and several berry bushes. The three cheered because they had fond food for the night. As Bridgette grabbed some apples, D.J. bent down to pick some berries. Suddenly he smiled.

"Hey guys," D.J. shouted to Courage and Bridgette, the former forced to sit on the latter's shoulders so they could reach the apples, "look what I found." In D.J.'s arm's was and adorable little rabbit with big eyes and six little, darling whiskers. His companions smiled at the cute little fluff ball, before Bridgette cringed.

"Your not planning to eat him," she asked fearfully, "are you?"

"What?" asked D.J. loudly, "No way, He's my new pet. I'm calling him Bunny."

Bridgette smiled at the tall teenager. "You know," she said, "the thing I like about you the most, is that you are so kind to animals. You care about all living things, I really like that," she admitted while she blushed lightly. D.J. could not help but blush at the praise he had just received. Courage smiled at his two companions as they petted Bunny.

* * *

 **Courage:** Ah, young love.

 **Chris:** (sarcastically) Yeah, two tree huggers talking about animals, real cute. Now let's move on that totally awesome fight scene that Jack and Izzy were having.

* * *

Jack was having a really tough time of it. At first, it had been easy enough; he had blocked all of Izzy's attacks with relative ease. Everything was going fine until Demon Izzy pulled out a second pair of nunchaku. Jack now had to watch for twice as many strikes. He realized that he needed to escape until he could engage Izzy on more even ground. In one swift motion, he threw himself out of Izzy's range of attack. Then, he, using the training he acquired with the jungle man, leapt up several stories onto the tallest branch of tree behind him. Izzy was shocked.

"You can fly!" the she-demon asked in an astonished tone.

"No," said Jack, quoting an old friend, "jump good." Jack then took the opportunity to return to the camp via the tree way.

* * *

 **Izzy:** Wow, I really need to work on my battle plans better. If he can jump that well, who knows what else he can do. It looks like Izzy has finally found worthy prey. Be warned Samurai Jack, you are now under the attack of Izzy the Huntress.

* * *

"So," asked Geoff after the search party had returned, "any luck?"

"We found some fruits, as well as my new pet Bunny, but no girls," said D.J.

"I couldn't find anything either," said Duncan.

"Me too," said Morty.

"I ran into crazy red hair girl, but no annoying screeching girls," Jack said.

"Darn it," Geoff moaned, "well, it's too dark out to go do another search, so I suggest we grab a bite to eat and get some sleep. If we get up early, we can still win this challenge, and dedicate in their memory, how's that sound."

Most of the campers agreed that was the best idea, as they each grabbed an apple and began to chow down.

* * *

"Where the hell were you!' shouted Heather as Izzy returned to camp. Owen's fish were already being grilled. Izzy was smiling.

"I found a worthy prey that escaped my grasp," Izzy said. Many of the others realized that that should probably be the end of it, who knows exactly what Izzy would call worthy prey.

"Nice going Owen," said Trent, "the fish look awesome."

"Thanks man," said Owen, "I owe it all to grandpa."

"So you and your grandpa really fought a bear once?" asked Jonesy.

"Heck yes," answered Owe, "It was the scariest day of my entire life. We went in the woods, and it attacked it, so it was up to my grandpa to shoot the thing. I was never scared of a bear again."

"Hey, has anyone seen crazy girl?" Heather asked. The others looked around, and none of them were able to see Izzy anywhere.

"Izzy the Gopher, where are you!" shouted Owen. The bushes near the camp rustled. Owen let out a sigh of relief. "Good, we thought we lost you for a moment –GREAT PYRAMIDS OF GYZA!"

The others soon realized what Owen was shouting about. A giant Bear had stepped out form the woods. All of the Gophers took a step back from the giant mammalian carnivore. Cody wet his pants. Owen ran around like a chicken with his head cut off. Finally, Mandy shouted, "Quick, up that tree." The Gophers all followed that instruction to the dot.

* * *

An owl hooted, freaking out Bridgette. "Relax, Bridge, there's nothing to be afraid of," said D.J. as he patted her shoulder.

"Except Death Bear," interjected Stan.

"What the heck is a Death Bear?" asked Geoff.

"He's a mythical monster in northern Canada that wears a pickelhaube, a helmet associated with WWI-era Germany, and a red cape around his neck," answered Kyle. The others, particularly Duncan, seemed incredulous.

"Yeah I've heard of them," said Duncan, "I don't believe a single story."

"Oh no dude," said Kyle, "Death Bear is no laughing matter, just look at the _Wawanakwa Inquire._ "

Duncan read the headline, "I married Death Bear."

"Yeah," said Stan, lifting up another paper, "and _Fake Science Monthly_."

Duncan read the next headline, "'Death Bear and Fairy tales are real!' That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard. And where did you get those magazines?"

"Oh," said Kyle, before pointing over to a crate, "in that crate."

Duncan looked at the crate and saw on the side that it said, Death Bear Warning Kit. He also looked towards another crate, saying Tools to Attract Death Bear. Suddenly an idea for a killer prank was forming, as he turned back towards his teammates, he said, "You know what, you're right, I should be more careful. In fact, why don't you tell me all the things I shouldn't do, if I want to keep the saw bears away."

"Alright," said Kyle as he read from the _Inquirer_ , "First off don't play the clarinet."

"Go on," said Duncan as he held up a pad of paper.

* * *

 **Geoff:** I thought it was kind of harsh how Duncan was trying to scare them. I should have known that on this island, I should just listen to what the kids say.

 **Duncan:** (Arm in sling, neck in brace) Oh the pain.

* * *

"Never wave your flashlight back and forth," said Stan, "Flashlights are their natural prey."

"You're kidding," said Duncan as seriously as possible.

"Don't stomp your feet around, they take that as a challenge," said Kyle before continuing, "And don't ever eat cheese."

"Sliced or cubed," asked Duncan, wanting to make sure the prank was accurate.

The boys talked it over, "Cubed, sliced is fine."

"Yeah, yeah, and?" said Duncan urgently.

"Never wear a sombrero," the boys said in unison, "in a goofy fashion, or clown shoes, or a hoop skirt, and never, ever, ever, screech like a chimpanzee."

"Wow," said Duncan, "I never knew so many things could set Death Bear off."

"He's horrible," moaned Kyle and Stan.

"And suddenly," said Duncan slyly, "I have the feeling we're all in danger."

"Why?"

"I don't know," Duncan answered, before running behind a tent for a moment, only to appear in a hoop skirt, clown shoes, sombrero, and holding a flashlight and platter of cubed cheese, "just a feeling."

"Oh God no," said Kyle and Stan.

"Yes," said Duncan sadistically.

"You dumbass, stop!" shouted Stan. Duncan let out a few monkey sounds. "Duncan for the love of God please don't!" the two boys screamed.

It was too late; Duncan began to dance around, waving a flashlight, as he made ape sounds.

"What the hell are we going to do dude?" Kyle asked Stan, "Death Bear is now going to come and eat us."

"Don't worry Kyle," Stan replied, grabbing a stick, I'll draw us an anti-Death Bear circle in the dirt."

"Good thinking dude," Kyle said, as Stan began to draw the circle, "All the experts say it's the best thing to stop Death Bear."

Stan quickly drew a circle around the camp, which held every camper except Duncan inside it. Duncan, after several moments of doing these actions, stopped.

"Hah," he taunted, "You kids are so gullible. See, I did everything that attracts Death Bear, and nothing happened. If Death Bear was real, why didn't he show up?"

Kyle then pointed to his sombrero, "It may be because you didn't wear your sombrero in a goofy fashion."

"Oh," said Duncan as he tilted the hat, "You mean like this."

A rather large paw from behind Duncan grabbed the Mexican hat, and turned it upside down. All the campers, except for Duncan, had looks of shock and awe of their faces. The only one, who was still oblivious, was Duncan, who was still laughing.

"No," said Kyle, fearfully, "like that."

Duncan turned around, and screamed at the twenty-five foot tall bear behind him. He screamed as the Bear roared at him. As he ran away form the bear, it followed him, and, after making it off screen so we only hear what happens, mauled him. After several seconds of mauling, Death Bear walked past the other campers calmly.

"Duncan," shouted Geoff, "You okay dude?"

Duncan, who was severely mauled, replied weakly "No."

"Quick," shouted Kyle, "Jump in our circle before he comes back, Death Bear often come attack more than once."

"Are you crazy, a dirt circle won't stop that monster! I'm running for my life!" Duncan shouted, before running away.

"No!" screamed the boys from South Park, as the bear came rushing back and mauled Duncan again. When the bear was done, they boys called out, "Don't run they hate that."

"Thanks for the tip," said Duncan, before getting up towards home, "I guess I'll just limp home then."

"NO!" the bear was back again, which made the situation even more comical. After being maimed again, Duncan heard Kyle say, "They hate limping more than running."

"Well, I guess I'll just-" before he could finish, the Saw Bear was charging his mangled body again. When the bear again walked away from Duncan, Peter began to laugh.

"Dude, why are you laughing?" asked an angered D.J.

"Aw come on," Peter chuckled, "Don't tell me you don't find this funny. It's like we're in a cartoon."

Duncan had managed to drag himself into the circle, thus saving what was left of his health. The bear decided that Duncan was no longer worth the mauling that he gave the punk. He walked off into the forest, happy to punish another non believer.

* * *

As their teammates were having trouble with the mythical beast, Katie and Sadie were sleeping in a cave. They were being attacked by bats, and could not but be fearful of what else they would encounter in the cavern.

"We are going to die," said Sadie fearfully.

* * *

The Gophers were also having their own bear troubles. A bear was growling up at them as they sat in a tree. The Gophers were currently glaring at Mandy.

"I thought this was better than getting mauled," she said angrily, "Besides, if it wasn't for Owen bringing those fish, we wouldn't be in this mess."

"Excuse me for helping," cried Owen.

"Hey lay off the guy," said Fry in his defense.

The bear then began to sniff the fish, drooling slightly. Heather saw this and shouted, "Hey, keep away from our fish."

"He's probably already eaten Izzy," cried Lindsey, feeling sorry for the crazy girl.

"Well then, he shouldn't be hungry," said Heather, as the rest of the Gophers gasped at her. That was a cruel statement, even for Heather. Heather looked at everyone. "What," she said, "This is survival of the fittest. If she needed to go to the bathroom, she should have peed her pants like Cody did." Cody looked down in shame when he heard this.

The Gophers then heard a cracking. They turned to see the branch under Leshawna crack. This caused Leshawna to fall right in front of the bear, which began to growl at the ghetto girl. As the Leshawna began to cry in fear, the bear's growl lessened into a smile, and suddenly asked her, "are you okay?'

The campers on the Gophers looked shocked. Leshawna asked, "Did that bear just ask me a question?"

As she asked this, the bear suddenly took its head off. The bear was shown to be nothing more than Izzy in a bear outfit. As she began to laugh, the others, except Owen, began to glare at her.

* * *

The Bass were trying to sleep, due to the fact that they wanted to wake up early so they could still search for the twins. Bridgette, however, continued to rustle around, unable to get to sleep.

"What's wrong?" asked Jude, "got to go pee?"

"Yeah, but I'm too scared to leave the tent," Bridgette answered.

"Me too," said Jude as he held up a bottle with a yellow liquid in it.

Rather than pee in a bottle, Bridgette slowly went outside, looking for a nice bush. As she walked towards said bush, a large group of bats passed by her, knocking her back. This caused her to step near the fire, kicking a hot coal into the air, which landed on the tent, setting it on fire. As the Bass members in the tent got up, they all glared at Bridgette, who could only wave to them foolishly.

* * *

Izzy was still in her bear suit as she chowed down on a fish that was being cooked. She then heard a rustling behind her, as a bear, walked up behind her. It was sniffing the fish with its lips salivating.

"Wow," said Izzy, laughing slightly, "I thought that my costume was realistic, but yours really out does mine." The bear just stared at the girl, or more accurately, the girl's salmon.

"It's probably Chris," said Trent, as he pointed at the bear, "he's just trying to freak us out again."

Owen then got up and poked the large creature in the nose. "We know you're not a bear man," he said. The Bear growled loudly at the large teen, scaring several of the more competent Gophers.

"I don't think that's a fake guys," said Gwen as she slowly backed away from the bear. Many of the others followed her lead as they retreated towards the tree.

"Aw come on guys," Owen said, "It's probably just Izzy just trying to scare us again," he ignored the fact that Izzy was right behind him, "This is a fake and I'm going to prove it." Owen then grabbed the hair on the bears head, and pulled with all his might. Instead of a fake head, he ripped off some fur. The bear then got up on its hind legs and roared at the human that had stolen his beautiful hair. Cody couldn't help but wet his pants again. Owen then said, "Yep, that's a real bear," before the large mammal grabbed its hair back and placed it on his head again. The Gophers ran screaming towards the tree, to frightened to even try to save their fish. While running, Kenny tripped, and was unable to escape as the bear came up to him and mauled the parka wearing boy.

"Oh my god!" shouted Jonesy, "It killed Kenny!"

"You Bastard!" Gwen shouted.

* * *

 **Gwen:** What can I say, it is kind of fun to say that word and be completely justified in doing so.

* * *

The Bass were not doing to well either. After their tent had burned down, they were forced to sleep outside. This might not have been so bad were it not for the rain storm that started soon after the incident had occurred, and D.J. was forced to hold a leaf over the campers as they tried to get some sleep.

* * *

The wonder twins were holding each other, as they tried to sleep in a cave. They were unable to do so, as the bats and lightning made going to sleep impossible.

* * *

The Gophers were also unable to get any sleep, because they were stuck in a tree, as the bear laid waste to their camp. It was probably pretty justified, as I'm sure no one wants to have their hair ripped out of their scalp.

* * *

As the sun came up on Bass camp, the members looked as though, even though they had been forced to sleep outside, they still slept well enough. D.J. had served as a rather comfy pillow to Bridgette and Courage, and Jack was used to sleeping on the ground.

"Okay everyone," said Geoff, "I feel at this moment the smartest move we can make is to head right back to camp. Any objections?" None were voiced, as the Bass raced back to the main camp. Unfortunately, they were going to take a while, because they had to help the still mildly injured Duncan.

* * *

The Gophers where not in good condition when they woke up. They were all incredibly stiff and sore, because they had spent their entire night up in a tree. Plus their camp had been ruined by the bear, which had even torn up the map.

"I don't know how raccoons sleep in trees," said Izzy.

"They must be really limber," said Owen, before Heather charged up to them.

"You know what," she shouted, "I don't want to hear a word out of either of you. If it wasn't for you two, we could have slept in our tents last night."

"Calm down," said Gwen, "it's the bear's fault, not theirs."

"Shut up Goth girl!" Heather yelled. She then felt an ominous presence, and turned to see Demon Izzy looking at her with flaming eyes.

"Don't you ever talk to me like that you little, whiny girl," said the demon with rage, "We will win this challenge, you will shut your face, and you will learn to stop being so bossy, or else you will be punished."

"Yeah right," said Heather, "what could you ever do to me."

"Oh you'll see, you'll see."

* * *

The twins were also waking up in their cave, as they too had eventually gotten to sleep. As Sadie began to describe how bad the night was, Katie was fearfully pointing to a bear, the exact same bear which had had his hair pulled out. The girls shrieked as they ran from the bear, who roared at them.

* * *

 **Bear:** (in English subtitles) I can't believe what an awful night I had. I had my hair pulled out, I eat this really bad tasting kid, and finally, I get back home to find two teenage girls using my cave as a bedroom. The worst part about it is that neither of them were attractive.

* * *

As Chris and Andrew were lighting the fire pit, they both heard rustling in the bushes. As they turned around, they saw the Bass enter the common ground. The Bass smiled, as Kim shouted, "Were the first ones back!" As she screamed this, Homer collapsed from nearly having a heart attack from the long run.

The Gophers ran up right behind them. Heather looked shocked. "They beat us here," shouted Heather, pushing Owen down, "This is all your fault."

"Uh, uh, uh," said Chris, "not so fast, Gophers. It appears the Bass are missing a few fish."

It took several seconds for the Bass to understand, "Oh you mean Katie and Sadie," said a now rather healthy, Duncan, "I'm pretty sure they gotten eaten by wolves last night. Darn shame really."

Just as he finished saying this, the group heard some panting. They turned around, to see Katie and Sadie run up to the campfire pit.

"We made it," Katie said as she breathed a sigh of relief.

"You would not believe what we just went through," said Sadie, as she addressed the Bass.

"Well," said Katie, "at least this challenge helped get out friendship back on track."

They both squealed as they began to hug each other. Duncan walked up behind the celebrating friends. "Ahem," he said, before asking, "Is your little love fest over with?" They nodded. "Good, because thanks to you, we just lost another challenge!" He shouted.

"Alright," said Chris, "first things first, Mr. Jefferson, who is going to receive the MVC award."

"Gwen," Andrew said, "before explaining, she is the only one on her team who managed to have and impact on her team, without it being negative. Izzy scared her teammates, and Owen ripped off the hair of a grizzly. So I can't see anyone but Gwen winning this time." All the Gophers cheered for the Goth as she accepted her second medal in a row. All except Heather of course.

* * *

 **Heather:** I deserved to win this weak. The only reason Goth girl won is that she tried to keep everyone calm. I actually lead the team.

 **Gwen** : it really is an honor to win two awards, I wonder if this means I'm the most valuable camper so far.

* * *

"Alright," said Chris, "Killer Bass, see you at the campfire tonight. Gophers, you all won a vacation at a Yellowstone lodge after Total Drama. Congratulations!"

The Bass glared at the BFFs. One of them would be going home tonight, the only question was, who?

* * *

"You've all cast your votes," said Chris at his voting podium, "The camper who does not receive a marshmallow will not be able to return to this island. Ever!"

"The first camper to receive a marshmallow is, Jack!"

The samurai smiled as he caught his marshmallow.

"Geoff, Double D, D.J., Bridgette, and Courage!"

They all also caught their marshmallows, though Geoff caught his in his hat.

"Jude, Grim, Tyler, Harold, Ed, and Homer!"

They also caught their marshmallows; though Homer did it in his mouth.

"Jen, Wyatt, Stan, Kyle, Rick, Morty, and Peter!"

They also caught their marshmallows as each of their names was called out.

"Ezekiel, Eddy, Ron, Kim, Bender, Dib, and Duncan!"

They all caught their marshmallows, except Duncan, whose reflexes were still a tad slow from the beating he took.

"Campers, this is the last marshmallow of the night, and it goes to…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…Katie."

"No," begged Katie, "not Sadie."

"Listen," Sadie said to her best friend, "everything will be fine. I know you can do well in this competition. Just keep on trying for me okay."

"I will," said Katie as she began to cry. Sadie took the walk down the dock to the Boat of Losers, where she boarded. She turned back one final time, and waved good bye to her friend.

* * *

Geoff frowned. The Bass had lost two in a row, and were now at a numerical disadvantage. This would make it harder for them to win the next challenge. As Geoff walked through the bushes, towards camp. He heard a shriek. When he got to the other side, he saw Gwen clinging to a cabin wall. Gwen, when she suddenly saw Geoff, looked relieved.

"Man I hate bears," Gwen mumbled. Geoff had heard about the numerous incidents that the Gophers had gone through, and couldn't help but understand why she was scared. That didn't mean he wasn't going to milk it for all it was worth.

"Oh," he chided, "the great MVC Gwen is scared of little old me. Looks like the Bass will have an easier time next challenge."

"Yeah," retorted Gwen, who developed a smirk, "Hope your team doesn't crash and burn." Gwen smiled remembering how Bridgette had revealed what had happened to the Bass's tent. They both started laughing.

"Well," laughed Geoff, "I suppose I should turn in, I don't think either of us got much sleep."

As he turned away, Gwen remembered something. "Geoff," the party dude turned back to her, "I was wondering about something. You see, each person got four tickets to the lodge that we won in reward. My mom and brother would obviously come, but my dad died a few years ago, so," she said while blushing, "would you like to be the fourth member?"

"Alright!" shouted Geoff "Thanks a lot. We are going to party like there is no tomorrow." He smiled as he high-fived the Goth girl, who he failed to see, was blushing.

They both failed to see a certain queen bee looking at them from the cabin. As she saw this, she began to contemplate how she would ruin this new relationship, and hopefully Gwen along with it.

* * *

Izzy knocked on the boy Bass cabin. After several seconds, Harold opened the door. "May I help you?" he asked.

"You said you brought a red ant farm with you right," Izzy asked in a serious tone.

"Yeah," Harold replied. Izzy smirked sadistically.

* * *

Heather ran screaming from her bed, as her face was covered with red ants. Izzy and Gwen, who were standing outside, fist pumped at the sight of the preppy girl get her just desserts.

* * *

 **Losers:** Courtney, Zim, Noah, Eva, Sadie

 _ **AN: So for this chapter, I replaced the Saw Bear with Death Bear from Regular Show seeing as how I didn't think former was as scary. I hope you enjoyed anyway.**_


	7. Chapter 7

Chris: Last time on Total Drama Island. The two teams were forced to spend a night in the woods. Katie and Sadie lost track of time as they ate blueberries, thus losing their teammates. Jack while searching for them ran into Demon Izzy, who proved to be his equal. After escaping, Jack got to sit in on Duncan's attempt to test the Death Bear myth. This proved disastrous for him, as he was soon mauled rather badly. Izzy played a prank on the Gophers by dressing up as a bear. Unfortunately, a real bear showed up, and the Gophers spent a night in a tree. Cody peed his pants, and then it rained. So pretty much no one got any sleep last night. Ultimately, it was Sadie who was forced to walk the Dock of Shame.

We also got some romantic action last time, because Bridgette was impressed by D.J.'s love of animals, and Geoff high-fived Gwen for giving him the final ticket to Yellowstone. Heather saw this interaction, and is planning an attempt to try and discredit Gwen.

Will the Gophers keep up their win streak?

Will Heather put her plan into action?

And will Kenny ever get through an episode without dying?

Find out now, on Total Drama Island!

* * *

 _(Cue Theme Song)_

* * *

"Campers," Chris said as the contestants were standing in front of him, "Today's challenge, is going to be a rather unusual challenge for you," as Chris said this he pointed to some canoes. He continued, "You will be going to Bony Island, a mysterious place which is covered in thick jungle, with treacherous animals. Your job is to carry your canoes across the island. When you get to the other side, light a signal fire, and paddle yourselves and your canoes back to camp. First ones back win invincibility, as well as each of you winning a one hundred dollar gift card to Dick's Sporting Goods. So what are you waiting for, Move! Move!"

As the campers ran by him, he remembered something. "Oh, one more thing," the campers turned back to Chris, "legend has it if you take anything from Boney Island, you will be cursed forever." As Chris said this, lighting flashed above the campers.

"Yeah," shouted Owen, "A cursed island whoo!" the other campers stared at the big boned teen.

"Now get in your canoes and let's have some fun," Shouted Chris. As the other campers left, he heard a flushing sound, and suddenly Beth came rushing up to him.

"What did I miss?" Beth asked.

"Canoes," Chris stated flatly. Beth ran over to join her team.

* * *

Leela smiled as the Gophers reached their canoes. The Gophers all began to grab some to pair up. Heather got stuck with Owen, Izzy roped in Leshawna, Lindsey and Beth dragged Trent, Brian and Stewie were also joining together.

As Cartman got in his canoe, he screamed as the Sloppy Joe Monster jumped out of the beached canoe, and right onto his face. Kenny began to hit the monster with the paddle in his hands, and forced the creature from the black cooking pot to run away.

Leela smiled as she saw Gwen was alone. "Hey Gwen," Leela asked, "want to be on the same canoe?" Gwen smiled as she agreed. They both put on life jacket, and got in their canoes.

D.J. looked nervously at the water. "Yo, man," Geoff asked his partners, Geoff, Morty, and Double D, "Do canoes flip over a lot?"

"No," answered Geoff, "You're thinking about Kayaks." As D.J. let out a sigh of relief, Geoff then said, "Unless we hit some rough water."

"Water gets rough?" asked a now thoroughly frightened D.J.

"Oh yes indeed," Double D said, "I recall a few times when I've been on rafts, Eddy, Ed and I have been knocked over by rough water."

* * *

 **D.J.:** When I was eight, my brothers dared me to jump off the high dive platform at the pool. I was scared, but I jumped; wasn't gonna let them call me chicken. I landed on my butt. Sounds better than a belly flop, right? Wrong. My trunks went so far up my butt; I had to go to the hospital to get them removed. They invented a new word for what I did. The "wedgie flop".

 **Double D:** I really didn't have that many friends back at the cul-de-sac even after that time we went to find Eddy's brother. Ed and Eddy were the only ones I was really close to. I hope that even if I am unable to win this thing, I will still make a few good friends.

* * *

Geoff handed a paddle to D.J., before saying, "Dude relax, no one is going to get hurt."

"If this canoe's a rockin," said Owen as he rocked Heather and his canoe back and forth, "Don't come a knockin'," Heather took the opportunity to slam Owen in the head with her paddle, "Ow that smarts!"

Chris smiled as he cocked a gun; all the campers were in their canoes, waiting to start paddling. "On your marks," he said as he raised the gun, "Get set, And Go!" as he shouted, he shot the gun into the air. As the campers began to paddle their way to the haunted Island, an eagle fell out of the sky next to Chris. "That is going to provoke some angry emails," he said. Andrew stepped next to him.

"And to avoid said emails," the producer said, walking up to the host, "you're going to take another day long pay cut." The Host shouted out several obscenities as the campers continued on their way to Bony Island.

* * *

The campers were advancing along the lake fairly quickly. As they paddled, Izzy told Leshawna about several of her more interesting life stories. "And then these Bushmen taught us how to roast crocodile and koala."

"Um," asked a freaked out Leshawna, "Isn't killing a koala bear illegal."

"Probably," chuckled Izzy, "Probably."

At the same time, Gwen was talking to Leela. "So Leela," she asked, with a small blush, "What would you do, if you like someone, but their on the other team?"

"Um," she said, "I would say that you should," she said, trying to come up with a believable answer, "do your best on the challenges you do, but still try to communicate with whoever you like." Gwen smiled as she seemed to readily accept Leela's advice.

"Thanks," said Gwen.

"You're welcome," Leela said before continuing, "I really admire how you always have a cool head. You're not like Heather, if I told her; she'd have me voted off in an instant."

* * *

As this conversation was going on, the Bass guys were also talking about romance. "I'm not sure what to do," admitted D.J., "I like Bridgette a lot, but I never really had a girl friend. The closest female relationship I have had was with my Mom. Could you guys help me come up with some ideas?

"Why don't you make her something hand made," Geoff suggested, "try making her something that you think both of you will like."

"While that would be very sweet Geoff," interjected Double D, "I think something like that would be more appropriate for when they are already in a relationship."

"Y-yeah," Morty continued, "You see D.J., dating is like um, how should I put this? Feeding a bunny. You want the bunny to come to you so you don't make any sudden make any sudden movements. You drop a something like a giant heart shaped bowl on the bunny, and it is going to run, understand. The way I would do it is still do something sweet, at least in her eyes, show her you care about something, and that you are willing to help the needy, and she will start to like you even more."

Both the older teens were impressed by the knowledge of the two boys. "Nice advice little dude," praised Geoff, 'I'm sure you guys got a girlfriend at home."

"No not really," said Double D, "I would love to have one, but where I come from, girls like guys with muscles over guys with brains." Double D sighed as Geoff and D.J. stared at him guiltily.

* * *

 **Geoff:** good thing Double D and Morty said that before I tried to send a home made gift to Gwen. Now that I think about it; that probably would have ended any chance we had for a relationship right there. I'm going to help those two find a relationship with a girl here to pay him back. (Suddenly realizes what he said) Aw darn it; you weren't supposed to know I like her.

 **Double D:** They must think I'm pathetic, talking about romance without even having a girlfriend.

* * *

As the campers continued to paddle, a fog began to come up onto the canoes. As many of the campers began to freak out, they reached some rocks that encircled the island. When they finally passed through these out croppings, they saw that the island had a large Skull shaped cliff. Grim shouted happily, "Hey look, it's a vacation home." He then let out an evil laugh as the rest of the campers glared at him.

"Let's just get this over with," said Gwen as she and June lifted their canoe over their heads, and ran into the woods.

As the campers ran across the island, they saw that they were surrounded by bones. Skulls were sticking up from the ground, and skeletons were lying around on the sides of the path. Everyone, except Grim, who was used to bones and being a skeleton himself, Rick, who sees death on a daily basis, and Izzy, who was insane, were completely freaked out of their minds.

The two teams were suddenly split up when a large tree fell between them. As the Bass continued toward the other side of the island, The Gophers were cut off. They soon heard rustling in the bushes next where they were standing. Suddenly, three giant beavers walked out of the woods. They were tall as bears, and had large tusks as well as buck teeth.

* * *

 **Chris:** A remnant of the Pleistocene era, the Woolly Beaver is a day active rodent, who lives on Bony Island. Oh yeah, they're meat eaters too. Ha!

* * *

The ancient beavers began to chase the Gophers around the island. They ran by a bear, who was scratching his back on a tree. The bear looked shocked as the humans were being chased by the rodents. The bear put on glasses so he could see if it was actually real. After several minutes, they reached a dead end, which was just a very shallow pond in front of a cliff. Instead of attacking the campers, the prehistoric monsters turned around.

"Did any one pack a change of underwear?" asked Owen, as the rest of the Gophers laughed at his apparently well timed joke, before Owen said, "No seriously."

The cries of disgust coming from the campers suddenly woke up some vey large birds, who looked more like Pterodactyls than geese. The Gophers had jumped out of the frying pan and into the fire, because it appeared that even the Woolly Beavers were afraid of these beasts of the sky. As they ran in the opposite direction, the bear from earlier was still wearing his glasses, and snapped said eye wear because he thought that he could not be actually seeing something like that.

As the gophers continued to run, Kenny tripped over a large stone, thus causing him to fall behind the rest of the Gophers. The birds of prey swooped down on the parka wearing boy, his muffled screams ripping through the air as they feasted on him.

"Oh my God!" shouted Stewie, "They killed Kenny!"

"You Bastards!" shouted Brian.

Suddenly the Bass, who had been forced to take a detour, appeared, as they ran past the Gophers. "Come on!" shouted Izzy, "the race isn't over yet, we still have to burn stuff." Many of the Gophers rolled their eyes at the pyromaniac.

* * *

 **Dib:** Wow it's been a while since I talked on this thing, hasn't it? Any way, can you believe all the paranormal creatures in this area? Woolly Beavers, Canadian pterodactyls, and Death Bear, oh my!

* * *

The Bass had reached a fork in the road; they were at a quandary of where to turn. Eventually they decided to turn right. This caused the Gophers to turn in the opposite direction, heading to the left.

After several hundred yards of running, Trent, who was in front, began to sink. "Um, guys," he said, "don't want to panic here, but I'm shrinking!"

* * *

 **Trent:** Right, how am I supposed to know what quick sand looks like? It looks just like sand.

 **Chris:** (laughing) I can't believe they fell for that. I set it up, but I didn't think that any one would walk into it. That's just great.

 **Andrew:** (holding piece of paper and pen) putting down dangerous chemicals that could cause all environmental nuts to go insane. (Sighs while writing on paper) Chris, you're forcing me to give you another pay cut.

* * *

As Trent was sinking, Lindsey alerted the rest of the Gophers, "Trent's sinking!" she shouted before shouting, "I'm coming Trent!" as she jumped in, she also began to sink, "Wow, I'm stuck too, I so didn't see this coming."

Trent slapped his forehead.

Billy, like Tarzan, came swinging on a vine, his arm held low so he could reach Trent's arm. Unfortunately, he missed, thus causing him to crash into a tree. Luckily the vine came back, and Trent grabbed it, pulling himself and Lindsey out of the sand pit. As the others cheered for Billy and how he had saved the others, Gwen suddenly said, "Guys let's move it, we still have a challenge to win."

* * *

The Killer Bass were also having problems. While they were walking, Geoff suddenly yelped in pain. He suddenly fell down and held his ankle, while several of his teammates surrounded him.

"It'll be okay man," said D.J., as he lifted Geoff on his back, "I'll piggy back you to the finish line." Bridgette smiled at the big guy as he lifted his best bud into the air.

* * *

 **Bridgette:** I can't believe how kind D.J. is. When he saw his friend was down, he just picked him up with no hesitation. I wonder if I was injured, (entire face is covered in a blush) would he pick up me.

* * *

This small stop however, allowed the Gophers to get to the other side of the island first, where they were already working on their signal fire.

The Gophers were having trouble lighting the fire, however, while the Bass were immediately able to start theirs.

"How'd you do that so quickly?" Heather asked. Her reply was Duncan holding up a lighter.

* * *

 **Andrew:** Yeah, we did say that they were unable to bring lighters. But Duncan managed to sneak one through. Knew we should have given them an anal check, but since some of them are kids, we were worried about the potential lawsuits.

* * *

"Darn it," said Gwen as she brought some more sticks for the fire over, "We need more help."

"Justin!" shouted Leshawna, "Why don't you go and- hey! What are you doing?"

At that very moment, Justin was staring at his reflection in the lake. He was so entranced with his form, that he was not paying attention to their current predicament.

"Oh," said Justin, finally responding to his teammate's questions, "I just thought that you didn't need me, since you all were doing so well. So keep up the good work."

Justin then returned his attention to the lake, while all of the Gopher's, and even a few Bass, glared at him.

* * *

 **Geoff:** Okay, Justin is way too much like Noah and Courtney. He isn't helping his team. All he wants to do is stare at his reflection. I kind of wonder if he'll end up like that dude Adonis who stared at his reflection so long that he turned into a flower. Man, Greeks really do make up some weird stories.

* * *

As the Gophers, other than Justin who was still staring at his reflection, picked up some supplies for the fire, Beth walked over near a bush, and saw something she couldn't believe. It was a tikki doll, which was gray and had weird markings all over it. Beth, not having heard the warning about not taking anything from Boney Island, picked it up, and took it with her.

* * *

The Bass were not having any trouble as their fire was already well under way. Kim could not help but notice, "I don't think this is going to be big enough."

Homer, who heard this, suddenly saw the paddles for their canoes. Without thinking, he grabbed the paddles and put them on the fire. The other Bass were shocked with the sudden loss of their paddles.

"You idiot!" shouted Bridgette, "How are we supposed to get to camp now."

Homer's only reply was "DOH!"

"Man," said Peter, "This is worse than that time that I built a balcony in my house."

 _(Cue Cutaway)_

 _Peter and Louis are sitting in his house, looking at the T.V._

" _Man," said Peter, "That was a great episode of Lost wasn't it guys."_

 _Statler and Waldorf, the old men in the balcony on the Muppet Show, were sitting in it. Statler said, "Well at least it's got the right name."_

" _Yeah," continued Waldorf, "I couldn't understand any of it."_

 _They both began laughing, and eventually Peter joined in. He then explained to his wife, "They don't care for most things."_

 _(End Cutaway)_

"Oh now you finally show a cutaway!" Peter shouted up to Chris, who was in a helicopter. The other members of his team looked at him like he was insane.

* * *

 **Andrew:** what can I say; our animation department got a little more developed when we took a couple large chunks out of Chris's pay check.

 **Chris:** (Laughs sarcastically)

 **Geoff:** Dude, when does a guy find time to put a balcony in his den?

* * *

"Step back!" shouted Izzy, as she held a yellow sticky ball in her hands, "I made this fire starter from tree sap and some other things." Izzy threw the ball at the fire, which created a giant explosion so large that it jostled Chris's helicopter.

"The Gophers defiantly won this part of the challenge," Chris said, more than mildly impressed with the bomb Izzy had made.

"Where did you learn to do that," asked Heather, completely astonished by the concoction's affect.

"Oh," said Izzy, "you know, I spent a year training in the reserves," Izzy quickly swung her arm around Heather's shoulder, "Yeah, I got into some trouble there. I blew up the kitchen by accident. Which is why the RCMP are still all over my butt," She then let out a small laugh, "I am so totally AWOL right now."

* * *

 **Bojack:** Why do we put up with her again?

* * *

The campers placed their canoes on the shore, but the Bass were in a real predicament.

"What are we going to do without paddles?" asked Stan.

"Well," Izzy, who was passing by on her canoe, said, "You could always get someone to swim behind the boats, and push them. I once had to do that for this sixty foot yacht. The whole crew got out, and flutter kicked for three days straight. Four of us got eaten by sharks, not me of course." As she gave this advice, Leshawna hit her with the paddle in an attempt to shut her up.

"Okay," said Jude, "Who wants to kick us to shore?"

"We're actually going to take advice from Izzy?" Jen asked with fear filling her eyes.

"Not any other choice," said Jude, as he looked at the girl, "Homer destroyed our paddles, and none of them have a motor."

As many of the Bass conceded to this option, they all began to stare at D.J. When Geoff noticed this, he said, "No way, you can't ask him to do that. The dude can't swim. Let me do this."

Many of the campers gasped at this, including D.J. The big linebacker spoke out, "No way dude, I got to do this, for the good of the team. Plus with your bum ankle it could mean you can't swim either."

Bridgette smiled at the large African American boy as he got behind the piled up boats. The Mama's boy got began to kick as he pushed the Bass's canoes.

* * *

 **Bridgette:** I really am impressed with what D.J. did today. He faced his fear of water, and he helped his injured friend.

 **Jack:** I feel like D.J. has truly learned what it means to be a warrior. He has faced more of his fears than any one on this show so far. He is also unknowingly wooing the blonde girl Bridgette, so who knows how that will turn out.

 **Grim:** I got to say, what D.J. did took guts. A lot of muscles, but also a lot a guts.

* * *

The Bass began shouting as they raced toward the shore line. D.J. had been kicking so fast, that when they arrived at the beach, they rocketed in the air. The Bass cheered as they landed, only to stare in shock as the Gophers were standing right in front of them. The Gophers began to cheer over their apparent victory, until they heard a cough.

"Sorry Gophers," said Chris, "but I notice that there is a severe lack of male model on your team. Where is Justin?"

The other Gophers looked around, only for them to realize that Justin was no where to be seen. After several moments of looking, they heard movement in the water. The Gophers looked to see a completely calm Justin standing on a shark's head, as he headed towards camp. Justin smiled as he jumped off the fish, and smiled at his team.

"Well," said Chris as he saw Justin make landfall, "It looks like the Bass win this challenge, because Justin wasn't here and, like Katie and Sadie last time, cost his team the challenge for being late."

As the Gophers glared at Justin, Andrew walked out with the MVC medal in his hands, "I think we can all agree that this medal goes to D.J. for his willingness to face his fear, and help a friend." D.J. smiled as he picked up the award and put it around his neck, and blushed when Bridgette kissed him on the cheek.

* * *

The Gophers were sitting at their table, all looking rather pissed off. They were all staring at Justin, though some for different reasons than others. While most of the guys, plus Leela and Mandy were glaring at the hunk for losing the Gophers the challenge, most of the girls were staring at him as he drank a glass of water. He then winked at the girls, causing many of them to swoon. Even a few guys in the Bass team were angered by that.

* * *

 **Tyler:** I can't believe that jerk. He is manipulating Lindsey like she is just some puppet. I will not stand for someone doing that to my girlfriend.

 **Geoff:** I think that Justin is an even worse version of Courtney. He is manipulating the girls with his looks, so they will not vote him off. And I'm not just saying that because I'm interested in Gwen. (Suddenly realizes what he said) why do I tell you guys stuff like that? Any way, I need to stage an intervention, or else Justin will continue to manipulate girls, and that is just not right.

* * *

Justin was smiling to himself. He couldn't help it, he could manipulate the situation any way he wanted, and he wouldn't get voted off. It was all too simple for him to use the girl's hormones to his advantage, plus he could probably use Owen's and Stewie's strange attraction to him as well.

It was going to be too easy; all he had to do was talk the others into voting off Izzy. She was the obvious choice, not only because she scared him, but she had also given the Bass the idea to have someone push the boats.

"All I have to do is wait," Justin chuckled as he imagined the skin cream he could buy with a hundred thousand dollars.

* * *

"Look," said Geoff, as he addressed the Bass, "All I'm saying is that we should try to get the gophers to vote off Justin."

"Why?" asked Jude, "We already saw him cost his team, why should we think that he won't do it again?"

The Bass guys were sitting in their cabin, as they celebrated their win. They were now arguing if they should interfere in the voting that night. Tyler angrily glared at Jude.

"We should do it because of what Justin is doing is wrong," he growled.

"Hey," said Grim, "The only reason you care is that he is doing it with that Lindsey girl."

"What I'm saying is," explained Geoff, "If Justin makes it to the merge, he'll be able to control what the girls do, and manipulate his way past all of us."

"I guess you're right," said Stan, as many of the guys nodded their heads, "But what can we do?"

"I believe the best way to deal with this is to convince some of the Gopher girls that he wants them voted off," said Jack, "They might just turn on him if they care about the money enough."

"But who would be crazy enough to believe us that Justin would want to vote her off?" asked Wyatt. They all thought this over for a moment, before a light bulb appeared above their heads.

"Izzy," they said in unison.

* * *

The guys smiled as Izzy was sitting by herself, possibly contemplating the meaning of life. Or maybe just thinking what she could blow. Either or really, they probably are the same thing to her. She smiled as the Bass boys came up to her.

"Hey guys!" she shouted, "What's happening?"

"Look Izzy," Geoff said, "We need to talk about tonights-"

They suddenly heard a chopper above them, turned their attention to the sky, and saw a helicopter above their heads. A voice on the megaphone called out to them. "Izzy," it said, "We know your down there, you are under arrest."

All the campers present stared up at the helicopter. "You mean to tell me everything you said earlier was true?" asked Duncan as he stared at the RCMP helicopter.

"No," said Izzy calmly, "Just the stuff about the RCMP," she then turned to the helicopter and shouted, "You'll never take me alive!"

Quickly, Izzy reached behind her back, and pulled out one of her sap bombs. She then, with the aim of a sniper, threw the ball at the helicopter. As soon as the sticky ball made impact, the Gyro powered vehicle exploded in ball fire. The Bass boys all stared, wide-eyed at the cackling girl.

* * *

 **Duncan:** I think that "Izzy" is going to become a very common reason why members of the RCMP are on the KIA list.

 **Peter:** Wow that was more explosive than that time I got a tank.

 _(Cue Cutaway)_

 _Lois was standing with her eyes closed when Peter said, "Open your eyes."_

 _When she opened them, she saw a turret pointed towards her._

" _Botchy Balls!" she shouted in fright._

" _I bought a tank," Peter explained while he sat on top of it._

" _Are You out of your mind!" she shouted._

" _Let me show you how the gun works," he said, ignoring her question. He fired the tank, barely missing his wife. As he laughed, he turned the turret at his neighbor's, Cleveland, House. He fired, blowing off the front of the house. His friend was in the Bath tub._

" _What the Hell!" Cleveland shouted, before realizing that the tub was beginning to tip, "No, no, no, no!" He shouted as he fell to the ground._

 _Cleveland then asked Peter, "Could you please blow that towel rack down here," Peter hit Cleveland's house again, causing the towel rack to fall. Cleveland then said, "Thank you."_

 _(End Cutaway)_

 **Peter:** It is good to be able to do cutaways again.

* * *

"So," said Geoff, trying to bring the conversation back to the topic at hand, "We heard Justin talking about who he might want to vote off tonight."

That quickly got Izzy's attention. "Oh really," she asked, "Who?"

"Well," Geoff said, "You actually."

"What!" Izzy shouted, "Izzy can't go home yet. Izzy will get the others to vote off Justin."

Izzy then turned her back to the Bass, walking away so she could talk as many others into voting off the pretty boy. All the Bass did a group high-five, as they knew Justin would now have a really hard time avoiding elimination.

* * *

 **Izzy:** I thought you were kind off hot, but no one votes off Izzy Kaleidoscope Fitz-Patrick.

 **Justin:** I'm not worried at all. I know with my great bod, there is no way they would vote me off.

* * *

The Gophers were all sitting on the stumps at the campfire, Chris walked up with a plate of marshmallows.

"Okay, you know the drill;" he said, "The person who does not receive a marshmallow must immediately walk the dock of shame, take a ride on the boat of losers, and will never be allowed to come back, ever!"

"Okay," Chris said, "The first Marshmallow goes to Gwen."

Gwen happily caught the white, sweet treat.

"Leshawna, Heather, Trent, Cody, Owen."

They all caught their treats, though Owen caught his in his mouth.

"Lindsey, Beth, Cartman, Bart, Fry, Shake, Frylock."

They all also caught their treats, though Ed also caught his in his mouth.

"Bojack, Leela, Caitlin, Nikki, Jonesy, Early, Rusty."

They all caught their marshmallows too.

"Kenny, Billy, Mandy, Meatwad, Brian and Stewie."

These campers also caught their marshmallows, thus leaving the last two. Izzy and Justin seemed both fairly confident, as both of them were smiling.

"The last marshmallows go to…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…Izzy!"

Izzy shouted in glee as she grabbed her marshmallow. Justin couldn't help but look down in shame.

"Justin," Chris said, "I have to say, despite your hotness, it just wasn't enough, you cost the Gophers the challenge, and in the end got yourself voted off."

Justin just quietly walked on to the dock, refusing to even say good-bye to his teammates. Izzy just smiled with sweet satisfaction that the traitor was gone.

* * *

Geoff was smiling when he saw that the Gophers had returned without Justin.

* * *

 **Geoff:** I'm just glad that that model won't be manipulating Gwen any more. (Realizes what he said) Darn it, why can't I just stop talking about Gwen to you guys. It's like there is something about this stall that just wants to make you confess.

* * *

Geoff then turned around to see D.J. and Bridgette sitting together. They were both smiling as they petted Bunny and Courage respectively. Geoff smiled at their interactions, when he heard a voice say, "You did that on purpose."

When Geoff turned around, he saw Morty standing there, with a small smile on his face. He then said to the cowboy, "You pretended to get injured so D.J. and Bridgette could get closer."

"What are you talking about?" asked Geoff, who was nervously looking around.

"Please Geoff," said Morty, in a rather smug voice, "I might not be as smart as my grandpa but I can recognize a pratfall when I see one. Plus, if you really sprained your ankle, you wouldn't have been able to jump up and down celebrating earlier."

Geoff realized his mistake and blushed. "Don't worry, I not gonna tell them, I just wanted to say that you are a really good friend Geoff, and the world would be a better place if more people acted like you."

He then walked off from Geoff, who was blushing from the praise he had received. 'I'm just lucky that no one heard that' he thought.

Someone did indeed hear their conversation, however. Gwen smiled as she stood behind the cabin, listening to the entire meeting.

* * *

 **Gwen:** This proves that Geoff is probably the nicest guy on the show. He nearly throws a challenge, only to try to help his bud get a girlfriend. That is really sweet. (Suddenly realizes what she said) If you show that to anyone Chris, I will murder you.

* * *

Beth silently read from a book she brought. Next to her was the tikki doll that she found on the island. No one thought to ask her where she got it, so the Gophers would go to sleep unaware of the curse that now afflicted them.

* * *

 **Losers:** Courtney, Zim, Noah, Eva, Sadie, Justin

 _ **AN: See you next chapter!**_


	8. Chapter 8

Chris: Last time on Total Drama Island. The challenge was a canoe race. The campers then were forced to get off on Boney Island. Where, after several miles of hiking, they arrived at the other side, where they were forced to start a fire. Along the way, they met some pretty hairy monsters, and Kenny, rather predictably, was killed. In the end the Bass won the challenge thanks to D.J., who overcame his fear of water. Justin, whose fascination with his own face ended his chance at a hundred grand.

Beth also made a stupid move when she took an idol from Boney Island, thus inflicting a curse on them. Morty figured out Geoff faked his injury to get D.J. and Bridgette closer together, and Gwen thought it was sweet.

What new challenge will our campers go through?

Will Geoff and Gwen get closer together?

And why does that producer keep cutting my pay?

Find out now, on Total Drama Island!

* * *

 _(Cue theme song)_

* * *

"Good morning Campers!" Chris shouted through a megaphone. The Campers all angrily growled at the host, as they got out of bed. Chris was smiling as the campers walked up to him, he really enjoyed torturing them.

"Today's challenge," said Chris "is an obstacle course."

Chris then pointed at a large complex near the water. Its walls were ten feet high, and it covered at least ten football fields. The campers were amazed at the size of the large course.

* * *

 **Gwen:** How did they build that thing in one night without waking any of us up?

 **Andrew:** We actually built the thing off set and airlifted it here. Cost a lot, but hey, when you're cutting your annoying host's pay every day, you tend to have a lot of extra cash lying around.

* * *

"The challenge," Chris explained, "Will take place in this giant arena we built. When you enter, your job will be to get to the end of the maze. While going through here, you will face many traps, creatures and maybe a few other surprises. Eventually you will run into an area where we will have part two of the challenge set up. Winning team get's a pizza party for their team. Now teams, get to your entrances, and get ready to navigate!"

* * *

 **Andrew:** I didn't know that Chris even knew the word navigate existed.

 **Chris:** (laughs sarcastically)

* * *

"Okay," said Geoff, "Since only one of us needs to make it, the best thing I can come up with is at each break off point, we split up. Hopefully, if we do this right, we can cover enough ground that it will be likely that we will find an easy path to the exit."

The other Bass agreed. It was a strait forward plan, the only problem that might arise is that there would be more break offs then Bass members, but then it would be easy enough for those who ran into a dead end to double back to the main path.

The Bass then confidently strode into the maze, unaware of the horrors they would face.

* * *

The Gophers had already made it into the maze while the Bass were talking. As they walked for several hundred yards, they ran into the first fork in the road. Cartman, Kenny, Meatwad, Fry, and Owen agreed to go down the smaller path to the left, while the rest of the Gophers went through the wider entrance to the right.

The members, who went to the right, immediately saw that they had to choose another path to go down due to another fork in the route. Izzy, who was still completely stoked by the maze, rushed through the entrance to the right, while the others choose to go to the left. They figured Izzy would probably be strong enough to face whatever came her way.

* * *

The Bass were also heading down the main path, when they saw a side path to the left. Jack, ran down that path, and sent the rest ahead. The rest of the Bass came to a fork in the road, which was equal in size on both paths.

The Bass split up into two teams. The left team was made up of Jude, Jen, Wyatt, Dib, Peter, Homer, Bender, Katie, Duncan, Ed, Eddy, Tyler, and Ezekiel. The right team was made up of Geoff, Kim, Ron, D.J., Bridgette, Courage, Rick, Morty, Stan, Kyle, Grim, Double D, and Harold. As they split up, the Bass suddenly looked up to see a score board with all their faces on it. Suddenly, on the Gopher side of the board, Billy's light dimmed.

"It looks like Billy has been eliminated," said Chris over the intercom. The Bass could only wonder what had happened to the large nosed boy.

* * *

 _(Two minutes earlier)_

As the main group of Gophers walked along their path, they noticed that the walls became filled with cobwebs. After several feet, they noticed that the entire path was closed off by spider webs. While most of the Gophers walked right through it, Billy edged through the sticky substance slowly. Suddenly, a small spider landed on Billy's nose.

"Spider!" he screamed as he hightailed it out of their, and completely out of the maze. Heather slapped her forehead in irritation.

* * *

 **Heather:** Billy is such an idiot.

 **Chris:** Since Billy left the Maze, he was disqualified. The campers can also be eliminated if they get trapped, or in Kenny's case, killed.

* * *

The four Gophers who had originally split off from the group, Owen, Fry, Meatwad, Kenny, and Cartman were walking along the path. Kenny was walking behind of the others, as they were advancing. They suddenly ran into a dead end, and as they turned back, the walls on both sides of Kenny suddenly rushed together. They killed Kenny, and also trapped Fry, Meatwad, Owen, and Cartman, which eliminated them from the challenge, and also dimmed their faces on the board.

"Well," said Cartman, "at least it can't get any worse."

As the fat boy said this, a creature came flying over the wall. It was the Sloppy Joe Monster! As it attached itself to Cartman's face, Cartman screamed "What are the odds! What are the fucking odds!" and began to roll around on the ground.

As this strange sight was going on, Fry asked Owen, "Want to play go fish?" as the delivery boy held up a pack of cards. Owen and Meatwad smiled as they sat down to play, completely ignoring the screams of the fat boy from Colorado.

* * *

Jack calmly cut through another death-bot as he advanced along the path. A challenge like this was easy for someone like him who had fought so many other opponents before. It was almost too easy.

Suddenly Jack came up on a large courtyard in the path. The weird thing about this courtyard was that it appeared to be modeled after a circus.

He suddenly saw before him a large table filled with pies. Just as he began to wonder to himself what they were for, he noticed that from the entrance to the courtyard appeared Izzy, who was covered in what appeared to be blood.

"Welcome Jack and Izzy," said Chris over the intercom, "to the first team versus team challenge. Your challenge is, Pie Circus. In this challenge, you each will be supplied with some pies." Both Jack and Izzy looked at their own table of pie.

"First one to hit the other three times wins the mini-challenge and is allowed to move on," continued Chris, "The loser is eliminated from the maze challenge and will be forced to stay here. Alright, ready, set," Izzy slammed her table, causing all the pies on it to crash into Jack, "Oh, um. It appears that Izzy wins, she may move on."

Izzy cackled as she skipped through the third doorway in the courtyard. Jack glared at her, before glaring at the intercom.

* * *

 **Jack:** I will have to repay Chris severely for this injustice. He could have told her not to throw before he was finished, but instead he let her get away with cheating.

 **Izzy:** Yeah, it probably wasn't a nice thing to do to Jack. But Izzy is tired of losing to him, and now the score is 2-1 in favor of him.

* * *

The Bass team that had decided to go left; they ran into a very wide corridor. Out of one side, Very large bubbles were being shot. Though many of the Bass were wary of the large bubbles, Homer laughed at them.

"You idiots," he said, "What the heck could these things do to us."

Homer then rushed forward, and hit a bubble. Instead of popping however, the bubble absorbed the fat yellow man, and his face on the score board dimmed.

"I figured out what these things do!" he shouted, "They trap you when you run into them."

All the Bass slapped their heads in frustration.

* * *

 **Duncan:** I got to tell ya, if we lose this challenge, I am going to vote off that idiot Homer. He failed to complete his dare, and now he actually runs into an obvious trap. What an idiot.

* * *

The rest of the Bass were having trouble as well. In front of them was a door. But in front of said door, was a Woolly Beaver. The Bass stared fearfully at the large creature, who was snarling at them.

Grim, who was tired of dealing with this, finally walked up to the large mammal and said, "We can get through this two ways; one, you let us go through, or two, I send you packing to the underworld. Which is it going to be?"

The Beaver stepped aside and the Bass went through the door. All were cheering for Grim's quick thinking.

* * *

 **Grim:** (dancing) Who's bad! Who's bad!

 **Geoff:** I never thought that being friends with Death could be so cool.

* * *

The Gophers were having their own set of problems, as they were now faced with crossing a room filled with mushrooms the size of deer. Their objective was to jump on the many giant toadstools on the floor, without touching the ground, if they hit the ground, they were eliminated.

"Whoa," said Cody as he landed on one of the oversized mushrooms, "this is much harder than in Mario."

"I should have expected a nerd like you would compare this to a video game," said Heather, who was on the same fungi, "now shut up and jump."

As Heather said this, she pushed Cody, who, while trying to avoid falling, grabbed Heather's arm, and pulled her down as he fell. Gwen couldn't help but laugh at the preppy girl.

* * *

 **Gwen:** And karma strikes again. Sometimes the universe just gives you a freebie. (Gives a thumbs up to the universe)

* * *

The Bass who had taken the left path had managed to get past the bubbles with only one more loss. Tyler had accidently jumped over one of the bubbles, only to land in front of another on coming ball of soap.

Duncan smiled as he and the rest of his group made it to the next corridor. After several minutes of running, they would open another door, to see a large stadium. Dib stepped out onto the stadium, only to be hit with a swinging punching bag. Hundreds of these then came down from the ceiling, and began to swing back and forth.

When Dib's face disappeared from the board, all of the Bass members present realized that they would have to get bye the room without getting hit with a single bag. They all charged across the room.

Peter, whose body was much larger than the others, was quickly knocked down by the bags. Katie, who had used Peter as a shield, was smashed in the side by a bag after she tried to avoid another bag. The final member who was knocked out was Wyatt, who was hit in the back as he was about to escape.

As the remaining members began to march onward, Duncan wondered if the others were having this much trouble.

* * *

"I wonder if Duncan is having this much trouble?" Geoff asked as he and the members of his team were caught in a wind tunnel. They were being thrown down the hall at gale force speed, heading of a door.

Unfortunately, the door was only so wide, and only so wide and only Geoff, Bridgette, D.J., Courage, Rick, Double D, Morty, and Grim got through the door, while the others were stuck. As the door closed behind them, trapping Harold, Kim, Stan, Ron, and Kyle.

* * *

"So," asked Gwen, "What are we supposed to do now?"

She was referencing the fact that now the Gophers would have to cross a giant knee deep pond. So far, their only transportation was logs.

"You are supposed to log roll like the Canadians you are," Chris shouted on the intercom. All of the Gophers grimaced at the thought of rolling a log across to the other side.

"Hey," shouted Beth, who was slowly moving the log, "I'm doing it!"

"Can I come on," said Lindsey, as she jumped on Beth's log. This caused the log to become unbalanced, knocking both of them into the water.

"Alright boy," said Early, while resting on the same log as Rusty, "all you have to do is run backwards on this hunk of wood, and then we will be one step closer to pizza party city."

"For Pizza daddy!" shouted Rusty as he began to slither on the log at a quick pace. Unfortunately, Rusty went to fast and knocked himself and Early into the water. The wakes he made did not help his team either.

"Whoa!" shouted Trent as both he and Jonesy fell off their log.

Gwen sighed as she noticed that the only members left of the Gophers were herself, Izzy (who was somewhere else at the moment), Leela, Leshawna, Bojack, Caitlin, Nikki, Brian, Stewie, Bart, Shake, Frylock, and Mandy. She suddenly saw that the hall they were on would lead to a very large corridor, where two other halls converged with theirs.

* * *

"I think I see another trap guys!" shouted Duncan as the saw a large corridor.

* * *

"Hey look," Geoff shouted, "There is a big room up a head. Maybe it's another trap."

The members of the group braced themselves for another insane battle.

* * *

Suddenly, out of the three entrances to the corridor, the campers came into the large room. The two Bass teams quickly got back together, reforming their full remaining team.

As it regrouped, the Bass team was now comprised of Geoff, Grim, Duncan, Bridgette, D.J., Rick, Morty, Ezekiel, Bender, Jude, Jen, Double D, Ed, Eddy, and Courage.

On the Gopher side was Gwen, Bojack, Leshawna, Leela, Caitlin, Nikki, Shake, Frylock, Brian, Stewie, Bart, and Mandy.

"Hello campers," said Chris on the intercom, "glad to see that so many of you made it to part two of the challenge."

"Part two?" asked Gwen.

"Yeah," said Chris, "It is a re-evaluation of the classic game "Say, Uncle."

* * *

Chris and Andrew are standing with the defeated campers, and Izzy in a large room with a flat screen T.V. on the wall in front of them. All of them are eating popcorn and drinking soda, except Izzy who appears extremely ticked off.

* * *

 **Izzy:** Izzy was not eliminated from the challenge, she was removed for a technically breaking the rules. I guess Gwen is right about Karma.

* * *

"In this part of the challenge," said Chris, who was wearing a headset, "Each team will send out one of their members to complete a dare. The team whose member does the dare the most effectively, wins a point. If you refuse to do a dare, a point is taken away from your score, making sure you will all do the dares if you want to get this done quickly as possible."

Andrew then opened a file cabinet, and said, "I will be picking dares at random, so there is no way any of these have actually been planned out. Though I might go to the crowd up here for suggestions a few times."

* * *

 **Andrew:** I actually have what dares to give planned out. I used a simple system with multi colored stick notes.

* * *

"Okay," said Bridgette, "Who's up first?"

The entire group stayed silent for a moment, before Ezekiel said, "Aw, what the heck."

As the country boy stepped out onto the platform, Shake shouted, "This will be a piece of cake!" and rushed out to join Ezekiel on the platform.

"Go get 'em talking milkshake!" shouted Bojack, encouraging his fast food item teammate.

"Your dare," said Andrew, reading from a paper that had come up out of the file cabinet, "Is to eat five gallons of Chef's oatmeal, without hurling."

Ezekiel cringed as he saw two trap doors open, revealing two large pots of oatmeal. Shake just grinned being the slob he is. As Shake began to quickly down the oatmeal, Ezekiel began to take small spoonfuls from the container. After about twenty spoonfuls, however, Ezekiel couldn't stop himself from puking all over the floor. By this time, Shake had finished his container of the white gooey substance with no ill effects, and began to down Ezekiel's pot. Ezekiel, when he saw Shake do this, turned away and puked again.

"I think it's obvious that Shake wins this challenge," said a slightly grossed out Chris, as Ezekiel walked back to the Bass side of the arena. Ezekiel then hung his head down in shame.

* * *

 **Ezekiel:** My family may be freaky prairie people, but at least they fed me a healthy diet. (Suddenly turns green, before puking again on the bottom of the stall). When I get off this show, I will never eat any of Chef's food ever again. (Turns his head down and pukes again)

* * *

"Guess I'm up," said Duncan, "Some one needs to make up for prairie boy's weak stomach."

"I'll go next," said Mandy, just before she stepped out onto the playing field. The evil little girl and the juvenile delinquent stood at each other and glared.

"Okay," said Andrew, "Your dare is to, get in a barrel of snapping turtles, longest won who stays in wins."

Duncan looked horrified as two barrels full of the ferocious little reptiles appeared. Duncan and Mandy climbed into the barrels, and began to wait for the other to crack. It took less than thirty seconds before Duncan jumped out, a snapping turtle attached to his groin. But that wasn't why he jumped out. No, he had just realized he couldn't beat Mandy, because the instant she got in the barrel, all of the turtles climbed out of the barrel, thus winning her the dare.

* * *

 **Leshawna:** That little girl is pure evil. I'm just glad she's on my team.

 **Grim:** Now you know why I want to beat her and regain my freedom.

* * *

"I'll go up next," said Double D, as he prepared for his humiliation.

"Leave him to me," said Leshawna confidently, "I can handle a skinny white boy like him easily." Leshawna smirked as she stood across from her opponent, while Double D desperately wanted to hide himself under his hat.

"Your challenge," Chris said as he read a paper, "is to be crushed by a refrigerator."

"Say what now!" asked Leshawna as she began to hear a whistling sound form above, and saw a shadow covering her. She jumped out of the way, not wanting to undergo that type of physical pain.

Double D wasn't so lucky. "Oh dear," he said, just before the refrigerator landed on him.

"Double D!" shouted Geoff as he Duncan, D.J., and Ed jumped on the stage and pushed the fridge off the boy. Geoff then asked "are you okay, dude?'

Double D was flat as a pancake. Ed pulled out a spatula, and scraped him off the ground. When Double D finally was able to stand, he mumbled, "Curse reality T.V."

The Bass had to help the poor sock-hated boy onto the sidelines, where Courage put an ice bag on his head.

* * *

 **Geoff:** That Double D is one tough little dude. He looks so scrawny, but he still took the refrigerator. I am very impressed.

* * *

"Jen and Caitlin," said Chris as he read the next card, "Your challenge, is to stick your arm down into a tank full of electric eels. One who lasts longest gets a point.

Both girls stuck their hands into a tank, and after about a half-minute, Caitlin had been shocked so many times that she fell unconscious. Jen smiled and high-fived Bridgette as she had evened out the score at 2-2.

* * *

"This is starting to look interesting isn't?" asked Chris as he opened a can of cola.

"Hey, Gwen and Bridgette are up," said Andrew excitedly, before gaining an evil smirk, and handing a paper to Chris, "Here is their dare."

Chris grabbed the paper, and after reading it for a second, his jaw dropped. "This…, Is…, Genius!" He shouted as he suddenly turned to the intercom.

"Your challenge," said Chris, "Is to see who the best kisser is. So start making out and we will judge."

* * *

The girls just both stared blankly at the intercom when they heard this. "You have got to be kidding me," said Gwen as she scowled.

"If we want to get this challenge over with," Bridgette said, "The best way is to just go through the dare."

Gwen's scowl darkened. "Fine, whatever," she said as she got close to Bridgette, "Just so the whole world knows, I'm only doing this to get through this torture."

"Agreed," said Bridgette, before the two got close and began to kiss each other. The males in both the arena itself and the control room stared wide eyed at them.

* * *

 **Trent:** I…

 **D.J.:** Love…

 **Cody:** This…

 **Geoff:** …Show Dude!

* * *

The people in the both began to stare at the girls on the screen. Andrew and Chris were too busy staring to even try to judge. Izzy wasn't so stunned.

"Come on!" she said, "Put some tongue into it. It's like you're not even trying to make out! You don't even make half decent lesbians!"

All of the guys ignored her. They were too busy watching this great sight before them.

When Gwen and Bridgette pulled away, Andrew stuttered, "I think they both get points." Chris could not help but nod his head.

"Okay," said Andrew, as Brian and Courage stepped up for their team, "Anyone want a shot at making a dare."

"Brian and Courage are dogs," said Wyatt, "Why not have them pet a cat and see who goes longest.'

"Lame," said Chris.

"Why not make them listen to loud rock music," Trent said, "Dogs do hate loud sounds that would probably make them squirm."

"Good call," said Chris, before turning to the microphone, "Your challenge is to listen to headphones filled with loud rock music."

* * *

"Well that can't be too bad," said Brian, as he and Courage grabbed the headphones that came out of the floor. As soon as they put them on, both began rolling around on the floor in pain. After ten seconds, Brian gave up, giving the point to Courage. The Bass cheered as they jumped ahead 4-3.

"So who's up next?" asked Geoff. He paused for a moment when his team members stared at him. "Fine, I'll go."

Geoff jumped onto the platform, to see that his opponent was Stewie. The baby glared at the cowboy, who was waving happily at him. "The next dare is," said Chris, who had just grabbed another paper from Andrew, "Stay in a barrel of leaches longest."

"No way," said Stewie, "I am not getting in a barrel with things that suck my blood. That would make me feel worse than my cousin Stewie Cruise."

* * *

 _(Cue Cutaway)_

 _A boy who looks like Stewie is jumping on a couch next to Opera. He begins to shout incoherently, "I'm in love with Katie Hones; I'm in love with Katie Hones! Come see my new movie, I'm not gay!"_

 _(End Cutaway)_

* * *

"So no way in hell, buster," said Stewie as he walked off the stage. Gwen glared at the Baby as he walked off stage.

* * *

 **Gwen:** I just had my sexuality called into question in front of the entire world, and Stewie then goes ahead and gives up, which costs us the point I earned.

* * *

"Do you think there was any point in actually showing that," Andrew asked Chris. Chris shook his head in response.

* * *

Several more challenges breezed by quickly. Grim would have easily beaten out Nikki in the limbo contest, if not for interference by Mandy. She had thrown a rat into his eye socket, causing him to lose. Grim couldn't believe he had lost from the same trick again.

Courage and Brian faced each other in another battle of the dogs. They would be forced to eat boiled broccoli, courtesy of Chef Hatchet. Courage was able to keep the disgusting vegetable down, earning another point for the Bass.

Bojack and Bender both had a drinking contest, to see who can drink enough alcohol the longest without passing out, Because alcohol was a source of energy for Bender, he was able drink a seemingly endless supply of alcohol while Bojack passed out after a few dozen drinks.

The next match up was D.J. versus Leela, who was the last member of her team to make it to the second round. The round was pushing a truck across the courtyard. As the two began pushing, D.J. quickly realized that this dare would not be an easy win. June apparently could keep pace with him when it came to strength. Eventually, both were pushing the trucks so fast, that they were sprinting while they pushed. Both trucks crossed the finish line, and crashed into the wall.

"Were going to need to have a photo finish on that one," said Chris over the intercom.

After several seconds of waiting, Chris shouted, "and D.J. wins by a hair."

Leela stared at the ground as she walked over to the Gophers, who all began clapping for her. "Why are you guys clapping?" she asked, "I lost!"

"Yeah," said Nikki, "But none of us would have even made it difficult for D.J., you nearly beat him."

Leela blushed as Gwen patted her on the back.

The score 7-3 in favor of the Bass who now had a commanding lead. As Jude, the only one who hadn't gone yet for the Bass stepped up, the Gopher's sent up Mandy. The contest was to compliment each other. This seemingly easy contest was a complete victory for Jude; because Mandy couldn't compliment someone so happy go lucky on her life.

Duncan smiled as he regained his chance to prove his heroics to the group. Unfortunately, Leshawna wasn't about to be beaten out, and when the challenge came up, all of the males, except Chris, cringed.

"Eat a bowl of bull testicles," Chris said evilly. Andrew and the others just stared at him. Even Rick was disgusted by this.

"Why would you do that to our bovine brothers dude?" asked a horrified Geoff.

Leshawna, who was not nearly as sentimental when it came to these horrific balls, downed her bowl quickly. The Gophers cheered as they were now back in the game. When Duncan returned to his side, the other members of the Bass patted his shoulder, as they understood what eating the dish would do to Duncan psychologically.

The next match was a test of true skill and courage. After digging through a pile of mud that a pig had been wallowing in, Ed beat out Bart for another point. Many of the Gophers grew nervous as they were losing points left and right.

D.J. cringed as both he and Stewie were forced to undergo atomic wedgies. After several minutes, Stewie conceded victory to D.J.

"Man," asked Geoff, "How'd you survive that wedgie for so long."

D.J. gave a one word reply, "Wedgie Flop."

Courage was defeated by Gwen in a horror challenge. The task had been to watch a horror film the longest without screaming; unfortunately courage was unable to make it past the opening credits.

Morty won a challenge against Nikki in who could hold their breath underwater the longest, with Morty clocking in at 2 minutes.

Double D won a five question jeopardy styled game show against Brian. The dog did not even get one answer in before he was beaten by the genius Ed-boy. Brian scowled, he thought since he went to Brown, he would be able to beat a twelve year old.

"Okay," Chris said, "If the Bass win the next dare, then they win invincibility."

"I got this," Grim said, as he confidently walked up onto the stage, to face Shake, who was up for a third round.

"Your challenge is to stay in a room, with a moose!" Andrew shouted to the contestants.

"No!" the two screamed as they were in closed in a small room. In less than ten seconds, Shake had bashed his way through the wall, wailing his gloved hands. Grim walked out paler than usual, but he had still one the challenge for his team.

As the Bass cheered, over the intercom, came Andrew's voice. "Okay guys, I have decided that this weeks MVC award should go to Double D, because he did just get crushed by a refrigerator, and he did beat a college student in a quiz."

As the Bass lifted Double D above their heads, the Gophers began to sulk. They were going to have to vote another person off tonight.

* * *

 **Gwen:** I'm voting for Stewie, he's a wimp who wouldn't even try his first challenge.

 **Heather:** Sorry, but you are too much of a idiot, Billy.

* * *

"Welcome to the campfire ceremony," said Chris as he walked up to the Gophers. He continued, "Tonight, the person who does not receive a marshmallow will-"

""Have to walk the dock of shame," interjected Gwen.

"Take a ride on the boat of Losers," continued Nikki.

"And can never come back," said Bojack.

"Ever!" finished Bart.

"Jeez you guys are touchy," scowled Chris, "Okay, the marshmallows go to Gwen, Bojack, Bart, Nikki, Jonesy, Mandy, Caitlin, Lindsey, Izzy, Beth, Trent, Owen, Leela Fry, Kenny, Cartman, Brian, Shake, Frylock, Meatwad, Early, Rusty, Cody, Heather, and Leshawna, you all are safe." All twenty smiled as they caught their marshmallows. Both Billy and Stewie seemed to grow nervous.

"Billy, Stewie, one of you is going home tonight, and the one who earned the final marshmallow was…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…Stewie."

"Yes," Stewie shouted, "Victory is mine."

Billy sadly walked down the dock of shame, before turning to the remaining members of the Gophers. "I'll miss you all," he said, before he boarded the boat.

XzZZZzttX

"So it was good to get rid of Billy wasn't it?" asked Heather as she and her alliance sat down together. They were sitting outside their cabin.

"I didn't vote for him," said Mandy, as Heather suddenly glared at her.

"What!" Heather shouted, "Were supposed to vote as a team."

"Billy is my friend," said Mandy, "And even though he is an idiot, I still wouldn't vote for him. So leave me alone and shut your pie-hole."

Heather glared at Mandy as she walked off.

* * *

 **Heather:** I now know that this alliance between Mandy and I is not going to be an easy one. It will eventually come down to who can strike the other first.

* * *

Geoff was smiling as he sat down on a lounge chair on the dock. Suddenly, a leech came flying over head and landed on him. As Geoff freaked out, and threw the leech away, he saw Gwen laughing at him.

"So," she asked him, "how'd you like the challenge."

Geoff blushed at that statement. "It was cool, yeah cool," he said in an embarrassed tone.

Gwen just laughed as she walked back to her cabin, leaving Geoff blushing on the dock.

* * *

 _ **Losers:** Courtney, Zim, Noah, Eva, Sadie, Justin, Billy_

 _ **AN: Yes Billy is gone. He didn't really offer that much to the story, other than being just a miniature Ed or Homer. The rivalry between Jack and Izzy has intensified as well. I am thankful for your support of my writing, and your willingness to give your opinions. I'm sure all the male readers will enjoy the kissing contest. But the unexpected loss of the curse has yet to occur. Thank you for reading, see you soon.**_


	9. Chapter 9

Chris: Last time on Total Drama Island. The campers faced a giant obstacle course. While some campers got through without any trouble, others were not so lucky. The second part of the challenge was a dare contest. In it we had puking, kissing, and a room with a moose. In the end, the Bass added another victory to their total, and the Gophers sent Billy home. Double D was given the MVC award for allowing himself to be crushed by a refrigerator.

What will today's challenge bring for our campers?

Will Morty prove himself as ever being useful in this challenge?

And will the Gophers find out about Beth's cursed idol?

Find out now, on Total Drama Island!

* * *

 _(Cue theme song)_

* * *

"Wake up campers," Chris shouted into his megaphone, as he passed by the cabins on his ATV, "Your next challenge will be explained at breakfast."

* * *

 **Gwen:** Sometimes I wish that he would drive that thing off a cliff.

* * *

The campers were slowly dipping their spoons into the oatmeal that Chef had prepared for breakfast. All of them were looking sick to their stomach. Double D more so than others.

* * *

 **Double D:** I can't stand to call this paste food. We should call the authorities and have Chris sued for inhumane treatment.

 **Chris:** Their contracts say you can't, that is why these teenagers need to learn to read before they sign something.

 **Eddy:** I'm getting kind of ticked off. It should be me, Mr. Eddy who gets all that dough from the challenges. Man this stinks!

* * *

"Campers are you ready to rumble," said Chris as he entered the main lodge. Many of the campers gasped and closed their eyes. Chris had decided to wear wrestling tights. Chris then began to do a few posses for them. "I know, I look so manly in them that you are blinded by it," he said in a smug voice.

"What Chris is trying to demonstrate," said Andrew as he walked up in a suit and tie, "Is that we are going to have a five-on-five wrestling tag team match." He suddenly pulled out a large piece of paper, "Our competitors are for the Bass; Duncan," the punk raised up his hand in a fist," Homer," Homer stood up and cheered, "Peter," Peter smiled and hugged his other overweight Bass buddy, "Bender," Bender jumped up on the table and cheered, "and finally Morty." Morty cringed as he remembered his days fighting in the Thunder Dome.

"And for the Gophers," said Andrew, as he turned to their table, "We have Trent," Trent smiled as he heard his name called, "Owen," Owen jumped up and cheered when he heard his name called, "Izzy," The wild girl cackled as she heard her name called, "Heather," the preppy girl screamed out in frustration when she heard her name, "And lastly, Rusty," Rusty grinned as he felt he could now prove himself in front of his dad.

"Your challenge," said Chris, desperately wanting the attention to be brought back to him, "will occur at high noon tomorrow, so get prepared, make a strategy, whatever, I really don't care. All I care about is that we send some people to the hospital after this challenge."

All of the campers cringed, though none as fiercely as Morty. He looked white as a ghost as he tried to sneak out of the cafeteria. Geoff saw him, and grabbed his arm.

"Come on dude," he said, "We got to start training you."

Morty defied logic and paled even further.

* * *

Morty was more embarrassed at this one moment than any other in his life. Here he was on national TV, and he could not even bench 50 pounds. Duncan was laughing at the poor teen as the bar was crushing his wind pipe. He laughed even more when it was Courage and Double D who lifted the bar off the poor boy.

Morty looked down in shame as the others began to discuss how they would win. He felt that there was no way he could contribute to the team, and it could cost him the hundred grand.

* * *

"I'm doomed," said Morty as he sulked. He knew he would stand no chance against any member on the opposing team.

"Look guys," said Geoff, who was currently addressing the rest of the team, "I really like Morty, but if we're going to win this, we need someone to train him. Someone with enough skills to beat down on those Gophers."

"Guys look no further," Duncan said in a smug tone, "I got some techniques from juvie that will make him tougher than Hades," he then paused for a second, contemplating something, "Or mentally scar him for life, 50-50 really."

Geoff was about to speak up, when Duncan grabbed Morty by the shirt, and dragged him away. Geoff could only say one thing, "May God have mercy on his soul, because Duncan shall show him none."

* * *

"Uh, Duncan, are you sure t-this is a good idea?"

Morty was currently standing on top of a wall that surrounded a pin. Inside said pen was about a dozen hungry raccoons. Morty could not fathom why they would need raccoons, or even less why he needed to be covered in chum.

"I read this in a book in the juvie's library," Duncan said, "Usually you're supposed to do it with cats, but raccoons will work just fine."

"W-what exactly I am supposed to do?" asked Morty.

"Oh," said Duncan, "not much," he suddenly pushed Morty into the pin, "All you have to do is live through this, and you will become the master of the newly made up 'raccoon fist'."

Morty's screams echoed across the camp. Duncan just stood their carving a skull out of a piece of wood. The raccoons were merciless; they bit, scratched and gnawed at him. After ten minutes or so, Morty had managed to pull himself out of the pen. His clothes were in tatters, and he had scratches and bite marks covering his body.

"Well," said Duncan, "You didn't quite learn the fist, but we can come back to this later," Duncan then grabbed Morty by his supremely mangled shirt, and dragged him off for more training.

* * *

(Cue _Eye of the Tiger_ )

"Oh God, I hate training montages," mumbled Morty as he suddenly found himself holding an axe. He was now supposed to cut down a tree. As he lifted up the axe, the blade slipped off the handle, and he when he wacked the tree, he not only failed to cut the old oak down, but he actually caused the handle to ricochet into his face, knocking him down.

Duncan then lifted him up by his collar and carried him over to the next exercise. The punk shook his head at the weakness of his pupil.

Duncan had put chum on Morty again and thrown him into the raccoon pin again. Morty's screams are clearly audible, though Duncan is ignoring them, focusing on the new skull he is making from wood. The old one is clearly visible.

The next exercise was an archery challenge. Morty, with some help from Ezekiel, was able to pull the arrow back far enough that it flew through the air with great speed. Unfortunately, instead of hitting the bulls-eye that Duncan had set up, the arrow actually hit Kenny, predictably killing him.

"Oh my God, he killed Kenny!" shouted Stan.

"You Bastard!" yelled Kyle.

Duncan didn't know whether to be proud or pissed off at his protégé, though he would decide the latter when Morty began to cry over Kenny's corpse.

Morty was again stuck in the raccoon pin. Duncan was now on his seventh skull, and the pile was quickly rising.

Morty was now forced to paint a wall. While he was easily able to understand the upward and downward strokes, the two were chased away by Chef, who was angry at having the kitchen's walls defaced.

Morty had gone back to the pin, and was yet again screaming for his life. Duncan was now on his twenty-fourth skull, while the other skulls had been placed into a pyramid shape.

Duncan had now wrapped his shirt around his and Morty's arms. He then began punching the poor boy, who could not block a single hit.

"Could we at least try to avoid clichés," said Morty as Duncan held up a giant ham in front of him. When Morty's arm punched the pig carcass, his arm crunched up from pain.

The final part of the day of training was a lap around the camp, which Duncan completed far faster than his pupil, whose injuries significantly slowed him down.

 _(Cue end of Eye of the Tiger)_

* * *

"Get some sleep cupcake," said Duncan, "cause tomorrow, you're going to use that stuff I taught you to win us a challenge."

When the others went to sleep, Morty was awake, with his eyes wide open. He wouldn't stand a chance in tomorrow's challenge. The young teen sighed as he began to pack up his things. He just knew that tomorrow, he would be leaving Total Drama Island.

* * *

 **Geoff:** Let me tell you that Morty gave us quite a scare that morning.

* * *

Geoff awoke from sleep rather easily. He was always a morning person. He was also a night person. Heck, as long as he was alive to party, he didn't care what time of day it was.

Any way, as Geoff woke up, he noticed that the bunk next to his was empty. Geoff then began to look around, but Morty was no where in sight. Geoff quickly began to wake up the other Bass members. They had to find Morty before the challenge began.

"It looks like he packed his things," said Stan, as he pulled out Double D's drawer.

"What the heck did you do to him yesterday?" asked D.J.

"Well I did try to teach him the 'raccoon fist'," said Duncan, " and I threw him into a pin with some raccoons while he was covered in fish guts."

Jack slapped his face. "You got that from the _Big Book of Butt-Whooping?_ "

"Yeah, so."

"You never read the last page of the cat fist did you," Jack said with furrowed brows, "The page that says, "Only an idiot would use this training, and who ever does should seriously have their head examined."

"Oops," said Duncan weakly as the other Bass guys glared at him.

"Nice going, dipshit," Rick said, angry at the punk for using Morty without his permission.

"We need to find him," said Geoff, 'alright, Duncan, you and the rest of the guys in the challenge go over and get ready. The rest of us will go look for Morty dude."

* * *

Morty sighed as he sat at the end of the dock, with his bags packed and sitting next to him. He sighed as he realized by the shadows on the ground, it was almost noon. He heard his teammates calling for him, but he didn't answer. He realized that he would be no help in the upcoming match.

"Morty," a voice called, " You must hurry or you will miss the match."

Morty turned to see Jack standing behind him. Morty then turned away from the samurai and said, "Why should I. I'll only hold the team back."

Jack couldn't help but see himself in the boy in font of him. "Listen to me," Jack said, "Even if you are not the strongest that does not mean you have no use."

"All of us have our fears," Jack continued, "But what makes a person courageous, is not having no fear, but learning to overcome the fear that plagues us."

"What we need from you is to fight today," said Jack at a now standing Morty, "If you fight your hardest, I am sure you will help us in one way or another."

Morty smiled, and then began to run over to the ring, where the match was being held. Jack then shouted something to him, "Remember to keep your balance, fight hard, and reach in your self and gain your eye of the tiger."

* * *

"Okay," said Chris on his microphone, as he sat in announcers table "I hope you are already for the five-on-five match on Wawanakwa wrestling tonight. For the Gophers, we have Owen, Trent, Izzy, Heather, and Rusty."

Chris flipped a switch that said 'fake cheering' on it, as the Gophers stepped into the ring.

"And for the Bass," Chris continued, "We have Duncan, Peter, Homer, Bender, and Morty."

As Chris pressed the 'fake cheering' button again, the Bass, minus Morty, stepped into the ring. "Chris then asked, "Where is Morty?"

"The others are looking for him," said Duncan as Chris shrugged.

"Whatever," said Chris, "Now, Are you ready to rumble?"

The two sides suddenly rushed at one another, preparing for a great battle. Duncan took on Izzy, who dodged and parried all of the Punks punches rather easily. At the same time, Homer had taken on Trent. This was not going well, as Trent ended up getting caught in his famous choke hold.

Peter meanwhile was taking on Owen. Owen's stomach was to bouncy to take any real damage from Peter's punches so Peter proceeded to kick him the nuts, and Bender easily dodged Heather's blows by twisting and stretching his limbs Ron attempted to help and then retaliated with a punch of his own knocking the Queen Bee out and Peter finished Owen off by crushing him with his own weight, taking both out of the challenge. Before they could enjoy their victory, Izzy suddenly threw Duncan on to them, after knocking him out easily. Finally Izzy jumped Homer from behind and was taken out as well.

Just as Master Referee Hatchet was about to give the challenge to the Gophers, everyone heard panting. Morty had finally shown up, and was pulling himself onto the ring. The Bass cheered as their wayward member had finally arrived. Chef turned to Andrew, who was sitting next to Chris. "He can still compete," said the producer, "since you had yet to call the match."

"Hey!" shouted Heather, "We just won fair and square, its not our fault that geek wasn't here."

"Why worry," said Rusty, "It ain't like he's gonna be a real challenge for us."

When Heather looked at the recently arrived camper, she realized Rusty was right. Morty looked like he had only slept and hour the night before, and he had also been running to get to the match in time. Rusty smiled; this was going to be easier than he thought.

"Okay," said Chef, "Let the match continue."

As Chef blew the whistle, The remaining Gophers lunged at Double D. Izzy put him in a head lock, that Morty was barely able to squeeze out of. Rusty then performed a clothesline on him. Just as Morty tired to get up, Izzy then jumped above him and did a body slam. It was then that something inside Morty snapped

"No more!" Morty shouted as he jumped up, with a crazed look covering his face. Even Rick had a more than a little fear cross his face. He then calmed himself.

Izzy charged at Morty. With one great kick, he sent the skinny boy flying out of the ring, and into a tree. Morty's screams echoed through the tree. While Geoff was about to pull the poor suffering boy out, Morty pushed himself away from the tree, revealing that he had accidently entered the home of some now greatly ticked off raccoons. Morty then began jumping around inside the ring, trying to get the raccoons to let him go. Eventually, he managed to rip them off, and threw them away. Fortunately for the Bass, he accidently threw them at Izzy. Instantly, Izzy became more interested in fighting the vermin, and quickly began fighting them. This would lead to her jumping out of the ring, thus disqualifying her.

* * *

 **Andrew:** In case you're wondering, the reason why we let Morty leave the arena, and not Izzy, is because he never actually touched the ground. Izzy did, and was eliminated as such.

 **Izzy:** Aw man, eliminated on a technicality again. Well, at least I have another rival. Morty is going to have to go on the back burner I'm afraid. Jack is just too great a prey to pass up.

* * *

The only remaining member left was Rusty who could only look in fear at the enraged Morty he looked down on the redneck octopus.

"Boo!"

"Ah!" screamed Rusty, before he fainted in fright. The Gophers just shook their heads.

"And Morty single handedly takes down the remaining Gopher group!" Chris shouted into the microphone. The host then turned to Andrew, "Now that is what I call good TV!"

"I can't help but agree with you," said Andrew as he smiled at Morty, who was being thrown up into the air by his team, "And let me extend my congratulations to Double D for courage, strength, and one of the best chewing outs I've ever seen."

Morty smiled as he was handed the MVC medal. He had proven himself to his team, and had finally one an MVC award. As the Bass praised Double D, all the Gophers were glaring at Rusty, who was only now awakening from his unconscious state.

* * *

The Gophers were now sitting at another campfire ceremony. Most of the campers were glaring at Rusty, who was still incoherent. The other Gophers who had fought in the ring, other than Izzy of course, had bandages covering their whole bodies. Chris smirked evilly as he came up to the podium, a plate of marshmallows in his hand.

"You guys seem to know the drill," said Chris, remembering the last time they had a ceremony, "So, remember, the one of you that does not receive a marshmallow, must get on the Boat of Losers, and leave here and never come back. Ever!"

"First marshmallows go to, Gwen."

Gwen caught her marshmallow, still having a bored look across her face.

"Owen, Izzy, Heather, Lindsey, Beth."

They all also caught their marshmallows.

"Leshawna, Cody, Fry, Mandy, Caitlin, Early."

They all also caught their marshmallows, though Ed caught his in his mouth.

"Jonesy, Bart, Leela, Nikki, Frylock, Meatwad."

They all also caught their marshmallows.

"Cartman, Kenny, Bojack, Shake, Brian and Stewie."

As they caught their marshmallows, only Trent and Rusty were left. Chris grabbed the last marshmallow and held it in his hand.

"And the last marshmallow goes to…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…Trent!"

Trent smiled as he caught his marshmallow.

"Daddy no!" Rusty yelled as he was dragged to the boat.

"Daddy yes!" Chris said mockingly.

* * *

Morty was sitting on the deck of the cabin. He smiled as he remembered the party the Bass threw in his celebration. He was especially happy in seeing Duncan forced to put a raccoon down his pants. Morty had gained a new respect for the game truth or dare.

* * *

Geoff smiled as he was sitting by a window, proud of how Morty was able to conquer his fears. In a few seconds, he turned back to the group, and started partying again. The night was young after all.

* * *

 _ **Losers:** Courtney, Zim, Noah, Eva, Sadie, Justin, Billy, Rusty_

 _ **AN: So I made a lot of changes to this chapter, being that I had Morty take over Double D's spot in the challenge because after what happened in the Big Picture Show, I don't think that Eddy would treat Double D the same way he did during the show, which was one of the reason why I had all of the Eds be on the same team. That being said, I hope you enjoyed this chapter.**_


	10. Chapter 10

Chris: Last time on Total Drama Island. The teams were forced to put up five man teams to wrestle each other. Duncan tried to train Morty, but in the end the numerous beatings and raccoon attacks scared the scrawny kid away. After some advice from Jack, Morty went on to single handedly beat every member of the Gopher's wrestling team. This would lead to trailer park Rusty being voted off the island. The Gophers have yet to realize that Beth has the stolen tikki idol, and as such, they have yet to get rid of the curse that has afflicted them.

Will the Gophers be able to break the curse?

Will Heather try to win with some underhanded tactics?

Will we learn about more of Morty's hidden talents?

And will Kenny ever make it through an episode?

Find out these questions and more, on Total Drama Island!

* * *

 _(Cue Theme Song)_

* * *

The campers were all enjoying their day at Wawanakwa. I now, apparently Chris had slept in, so Andrew gave them until two to get ready for their competition. Geoff was throwing a Frisbee with Gwen, Ed, D.J., Owen, Izzy, Tyler, Bart, Stan, Kyle, Kenny, and Duncan. Rick was busy working on his latest experiment. Double D was enjoying his Beowulf. Jack was meditating in Even Grim seemed to be having a good time learning to surf with Bridgette.

"Hello campers!" Chris shouted on the camp intercom system, "Get your butts over to the stage now so we can begin the next challenge. I have a feeling you'll like it."

"So much for having a relaxing day," said Gwen, who began to walk towards the stage. Soon both the Gophers and Bass joined her.

* * *

Geoff smiled as he ran up to Gwen. When he put his hand on her shoulder, she turned his head to him, and smiled.

"Think you guys stand a chance against Morty this week," Geoff said playfully as Gwen gave a small smile.

"Hey," she said, "You're forgetting that I still have more MVC awards than Morty, so I wouldn't be too confident in him winning it for you."

Geoff laughed in response, and both began to talk about a few other things. Only two other campers took note of the nature of their conversation.

Heather scowled at Gwen. The goth girl was attracted to a guy on the opposite team. She wasn't about to let her get away with that, and possibly cost her the win. But it was too soon to implement her plan; she needed to wait for the perfect moment. She realized, however, that she would have to wait for some point in the merge. Trying to discredit Gwen would be too hard unless there was physical proof of her being in a relationship with Geoff, and that would be difficult if they were on opposite teams. But hopefully the issue would be null and void by then.

* * *

 **Heather:** So I want to keep Goth girl and Party guy from getting together. Big Deal, boyfriend and girlfriend are just another way of saying two way alliance, and I cannot let an alliance get far enough to challenge me. Though I must give some credit to Goth Girl for picking a respectable choice. I thought that she would have gone for some weird guy like Duncan.

* * *

Trent was also glaring at the couple, though at the other member of the relationship. He couldn't believe that Gwen liked an idiot party guy. Though he kind of understood it was his fault for leaving her buried alive. Trent didn't really hate Geoff; he just wanted to be Gwen's boyfriend. There was no way that he was going to let some wannabe cowboy from win Gwen's heart.

* * *

 **Trent:** I'm sure I can win Gwen's heart. All I need to do is look for an opportunity to implement step one of my nine step plan to win Gwen's heart.

 **Chris:** A love triangle, huh. That might boost ratings. I think today's challenge will give you the chance to try the plan Trent.

* * *

Chris had his customary sadistic smirk on as the campers took their seats in their teams bleachers. As they reached the performance area, Gwen and Geoff said goodbye, and went to their bleachers. Once the bleachers were full, Chris began to announce the challenge to them.

"I am sure that you are all glad to hear that today's challenge has absolutely nothing to do with any physical tests," he said with a forced smile as the campers seemed really excited about it. He had really wanted to have them all shot out of a cannon, but the darn producer said they needed a break, and came up with this challenge. Ah well, at least he was going to get some drama out of this.

"I hope that you're ready," said Chris, "for Total Drama Idol!"

"Say what now!" said Leshawna, as many of the campers eye's widened in shock.

* * *

 **Andrew:** Chris! How many times did I tell you that you are no longer allowed to rip off the names of already existing reality shows! Now I'm going to have to pay them off like I did with Fear Factor!

* * *

"In this challenge," Chris continued, "each team will have one song performed. It can be a single, a duo, a barbershop quartet, whatever; just now that you are only allowed one song. The songs will be graded by former musical great Chef Hatchet. He will give the song a score out of ten. The team with the highest score wins invincibility; losers are sending someone home tonight.

* * *

 **Andrew:** Originally, this was supposed to be a talent competition, but since both teams possess members with musical ability, I decided it would be simpler to just do a one song competition. I mean, who knows what awful things, could have happened if we let them pick the talent show.

* * *

Heather felt confident in her team breaking their losing streak. Trent had already proved himself to be a very talented musician, and he said that he had even written a song for the challenge. She then decided to see on the Bass were doing, it couldn't hurt to keep an eye on the competition.

As Heather peered at the Bass behind the bushes, she was about to realize how badly of a position they were in.

"Wow," said Wyatt, who was holding his guitar, "I never realized that I wasn't the only musician on the Killer Bass."

"Well of course you aren't," said Peter, who was wearing an outfit from the days he had been in a band with his family, "I mean, I have sung more than a few number one hits."

"Hey," said an astonished Homer, who was wearing the outfit from his days as a member "So have I. Wow, its like some guy that made your life stole ideas from the guy that made my life."

"I know," said Peter, excitedly.

"Die you plagiarist!" Homer then shouted as he grabbed Peter's neck and began to choke him. The others just stared at him, before another member spoke up.

"Yeah," Duncan said, with a pair of sticks in his hands, "I played on the juvie band. We won the talent competition."

"And I played on a legendary underworld band," said Grim, who was wearing a mullet."

"Hey, you know what," said Peter, who had escaped Homer, "We should form up my old band again; we can even keep a similar name."

"What was the name?" asked Wyatt.

"It was Fat, Horny, Black and Joe," said Peter, "But we can name the new one Fat, Fat, Black, Punk, and Grim."

"That sounds," said a rather annoyed Duncan, "rather stupid. But what the hell, not like we can do any better."

As the Bass began to talk amongst themselves, Heather began to grow worried. Trent may be talented, but there was no way he could handle Wyatt, Duncan and three professional musicians. She had to find away to take the Bass band out of the competition. She looked around, before she spotted a water tower. An evil plan began to be formulated in her mind.

* * *

Trent smiled happily as he practiced his song. Tonight, he would begin phase one of his nine phase plan to win Gwen's heart. He would sing a love song for her, and win the MVC award at the same time. He suddenly heard loud Rock Music being played. He walked in the direction that it was being played, and suddenly saw the five Bass band members playing.

"Hey guys," said Trent, "What's up."

"If you must know pretty boy," Duncan said irritably, "we are practicing for the competition tonight."

As they were talking, Heather, who had not realized that Trent was talking to them, had snuck by the water tower that they were practicing next to. She smiled as she pulled out the saw that she had grabbed from the shed. With break neck speed, she began to saw on the legs of the water tower. After finishing one leg, she silently went to the second, also quickly finishing that leg off. She smiled as she saw the large construction begin to sway back and forth. Finally, the tower's legs snapped from under it, giving out a horrific crack.

"You guys hear something?" asked Wyatt, as he, the rest of the Bass team, and Trent looked around for a moment. All of them turned around to see the tower collapse right on top of them.

The sound of a great crash and flowing water quickly attracted the rest of the campers and Chris to the scene. Heather swiftly hid the saw, and ran up to join them. The entire camp looked shocked at the injured bands. So did Heather, because she had caused the water tower to collapse on Trent as well as the Bass band.

* * *

 **Heather:** It might have been a smarter idea to have actually looked to see who was under the tower before it fell. But what the heck, I'm sure we took out everyone with talent on their side, so we should have an advantage here.

* * *

"Well," Chris said in a less than upset tone, "looks like neither of the planned bands will be performing tonight. Alright, prepare your second rate musical talent for this challenge by eight p.m."

The Campers just glared at Chris as he walked away from them. They quickly turned their attention back to the injured campers, and tried to tend to their wounds.

* * *

"Ok," Heather said, "Does any one hear have any musical experience?"

"Yeah," said Brian, wagging his tail as he raised his hand, "I and Stewie were members of that band that Peter was in, so we should be able to at least wow the judges."

"I was in choir," Owen said happily.

"Me too," said Cody, "I also got a guitar at home."

"Both me and Kenny were once on the school chorus," said Cartman, who raised his hand. Kenny then mumbled a few words through his parka. Cartman frowned, "Shut the hell up Kenny, I don't care if you're worried about what might happen. This is the one challenge where you might not actually die. The big accident has already happened."

Kenny conceded that chances were that he might actually live through a challenge for once, so he laughed as he joined the band.

"So," asked Owen, "What should we sing."

"Look," said Brian, with a rather confident voice, "I have the perfect song, all we need is banjos."

"Banjos?" asked Cody, who began to have a look of unease cross his face. If he played a banjo, just imagine what it would do to his popularity with the ladies. Everybody knew that the banjo was the worst instrument in history. Well, that and the bagpipes, but they only played those in Scotland.

"I have a feeling that Chef might like banjos," said Brian, "I mean has he shown us any other sign that he actually has a good sense in what is good and what is not." The Gopher members all thought that moment over for a second, and then shuttered when they thought of the horrible food that Chef had prepared for them over the past few weeks.

"Like I was saying," Brian continued, "I feel that this is our best chance, because me and Stewie are famous ad-lib musical numbers each time we go out and take a trip. This kind of singing and dancing will be right up our alley, so just follow our lead and let's get practicing."

* * *

"It is no sweat guys," Geoff said with a smile on his face, "I know how to sing. After all, what good would a party be without a karaoke machine?"

"Well," said Kim, who was rather ticked off about the whole band getting knocked out, "I guess that is all we have left."

Double D let out a sigh of relief as she said this. Thank God he would not have to do that accursed instrument this night.

* * *

 **Double D:** I am actually very good at the steel guitar. I detest the instrument however, and would like nothing more than to burn it to the ground. I am also unsure of my singing ability, though I do enjoy a good Bob Dylan song.

 **Cody:** I got to say, I feel pretty confident in how we are going to do. Hey, we might even blow them out of the water. Plus hot babes do love musicians. (Begins to pretend he is playing on an air guitar).

* * *

"I'm worried about today's challenge," Heather said to the members of her alliance, "I feel we should try to tip the challenge just a little more into our favor."

"How?" asked Caitlin, who was still a little down after seeing what happened to Trent.

"Follow me," Heather said as she led them toward the stage. She smiled sinisterly, though only Mandy realized it.

* * *

 **Mandy:** I have a feeling that Heather caused the accident earlier. She came up later than the rest of us, and she had some dirt on her shoe. A girl like her doesn't let dirt touch their outfit on pain of death.

* * *

Heather smiled evilly as she saw that her plan was in place. Just as she had planned, Geoff had decided to come and practice on the stage. She looked up and saw two spotlights that she had positioned above the stage. When Geoff stepped under one of the spotlights, and was prepping his microphone, Heather gave thumbs up to the others, who were standing next to where the rope that held the spotlight up was grounded. Lindsey, pulled the rope, and cringed when she herd a crash and yelp.

* * *

 **Geoff:** (Bump on head) I don't even remember what happened. All that I remember is that I was standing on stage, trying to think up a song that Gwen might like, and Wham! I was out cold until after the challenge. (Suddenly realizes what he said) I can't believe I keep telling you guys stuff like this.

* * *

"Okay," Kim said as she stood in the Bass cabin, "We seem to have a situation here."

As she said this, she motioned over to the currently injured Geoff, Duncan, Wyatt, Peter, Homer and Grim. As they all cringed at the sight, many could not help but expect foul play.

"Chris must really want to hurt us," commented Jude.

* * *

 **Chris:** I did, but my producer says that I will be forced to work without pay indefinitely if I do. Thank you Heather for doing it for me.

* * *

"KP," said Ron, "Don't you have a mad singing voice."

"You forget about my little problem with having to high a pitched voice," Kim said in an annoyed tone.

"I am tone deaf," Jack admitted, without any real anger in his voice.

"I was in choir at my church," said D.J., before a frown crossed his face, "But I haven't practiced in years, and when I do sing, I still have to deal with a few voice cracks."

"I am on the choir," Bridgette said with a small smile, "I think I could do well enough."

"Alright," Stan said with a smile on his face, "Bridgette will sing a song, and hopefully, we will still have enough talent to win tonight."

As the Bass cheered, none of them noticed Heather slip away from the Bass window, smirking evilly. She now had the perfect plan to get rid of Bridgette as well. The Gophers were going to win tonight, and there was no way she was going to let there be any room for error.

* * *

It was time for the main event. The spotlights were on, and the musical instruments were being set up. Bridgette squirmed as Kim and Jen were attempting to help her pick an out fit to go out and sing in. She let out a sigh as she ate a potatoes chip.

"I don't know," said Bridgette, before taking another chip from her bag, "You think I look good in red."

"All girls look good in red," Kim said confidently.

"It is a proven fact," Jen said happily, "Now let's try finding you some good shoes."

Bridgette put her chip bag down on a table for a second. Unfortunately, the table was near a door, and the three were so focused on the shoes, they did not realize something was amiss when a hand reached out from behind the door and pulled the chip bag out of the room.

Heather smirked as she pulled out a small jar. She quickly unscrewed the lid, opened the bag, and poured the contents of the medicine jar into the bag. Then, quick as a flash, she placed the bag back inside the room, and her smirk widened when Bridgette grabbed a chip, and ate it. The surfer was completely oblivious to what had just happened to the bag.

* * *

 **Heather:** Hydrogen Peroxide, tasteless, scentless and effective. Just the way I like it. With enough of that in her system, I can guarantee that she will not be able to sing tonight. There is no way we can lose now.

* * *

"Blauhgh!"

Bridgette could not help but purge in the trash can she was holding. She felt so sick; she thought it was completely possible that she may die at this moment. Another minute passed, and she barfed again. D.J. grabbed her hair after this, trying to keep Bridgette from choking on her own vomit. The other Bass members watched with equal parts disgust and sadness.

"We are in serious trouble guys," Kim said as she and the other Bass waited for the Gophers to begin their song, "We don't have a singer, and someone will need to step up in the next five minutes or we can kiss our winning streak goodbye."

Rick then began to walk toward the cabin, a look of determination on his face. He turned to Morty, Double D, Stan and Kyle. "I have an idea," he said, "but I'm gonna need the three of your Guitar Hero skills to have a chance of it working. We need to get that stuff, fast."

* * *

Cody, Owen, Kenny, Cartman, Brian and Stewie all got on the stage, preparing to sing their song. Cody turned nervously to Brian.

"Are you sure that this song will get Chef to give us a lot of points?" he asked the human-like dog, "This song seems kind of old-schooled, and I still hate the banjo."

"Trust me," said Brian, "Chef will probably like the banjo, and it's a song about how conservatives are wrong, that automatically makes it a good song."

* * *

 **Andrew:** (appears pissed off) I am a conservative Brian. It looks like I will have to remember to never give you an MVC award. Next to Chris and Heather, I think that I will like you the least of all the people here.

* * *

Brian stepped up to head microphone, smiling as he said, "Here is a song about a guy on a train."

The group began to play their banjos as they danced around one another. Just as they let out their first note, a crack was heard. Everyone turned up to see that the other spotlight that Heather had planted as a back up when she had taken Geoff out of the competition. The light suddenly fell from the rope that had snapped, and right on to, yep you guessed Kenny.

"Oh my God!" shouted Stan, "They killed Kenny!"

"You Bastards!" Kyle shouted.

"Well that could have gone better," Cartman said, before looking down into the hole into the stage. After a few seconds of peering into the dark depths of the stage, he screamed. "Not that fucking thing again!" he shouted as none other than the Sloppy Joe Monster jumped out from the stage, and attached itself to his face. As he screamed and rolled around, Ed grabbed Owen's banjo and raised it above Cartman's face.

"El Kabong!" he shouted as he slammed the musical instrument on the creature. He repeated the process several times, causing a lot of damage to Carman's face. Eventually, the creature let go and retreated back to whence it came.

Suddenly, above the stage, the chef-o-meter flashed four bars, signifying that the Gophers had scored a four out of ten. The entire camp looked shocked at the points.

"But we didn't even perform a song," Brian said angrily.

"I heard the Banjo and people talking," said Chef over the intercom.

"Then why did you give them such a high grade," asked Jack, "I am tone deaf, and even I know that wasn't a real song."

"I love the banjo!" shouted Chef. Because he shouted over the intercom, it caused all the campers, Andrew, and Chris to cover their ears in pain.

"Well," Chris said, while rubbing a finger in his ear, "I think this means that all the Bass have to do is have their band gain more than five points. So where is your band?"

"I think they mean that every member of their band is too injured to participate," Heather said sinisterly. The Bass were too busy worrying about what Rick was doing to care about the fact that she knew about Bridgette.

"Alright, Ladies and Germs," a voice over the microphone said. They all turned to see Rick holding a microphone on stage. Behind him were Morty, Double D, Courage, Stan, and Kyle, all with guitars.

"Dude," Stan said angrily, "You didn't have to take apart our game so you could make real guitars. It cost us fifty bucks for that game."

"Shut the fuck up," Rick growled lowly, before turning back to the campers, "We will now perform for you, a song called, "Get Schwifty", written by me. Ready guys."

Morty, Double D, Stan, Courage, and Kyle began to play a funky beat on the guitar as Rick began to sing.

 _(Rick sings)_

 _Oh, yeah!_  
 _You gotta get schwifty._  
 _You gotta get schwifty in here._  
 _It's time to get schwifty._  
 _Oh oh._  
 _You gotta get schwifty._  
 _Oh, yeah!_  
 _Take off your pants and your panties._  
 _Shit on the floor._  
 _Time to get Schwifty in here  
_ _I'm Mr. Bulldops._  
 _I'm Mr. Bulldops._  
 _Take a shit on the floor._  
 _Time to get schwifty in here_  
 _Hey take your pants off its schwifty time today_

 _(End song)_

"Alright Rick!" shouted Jude as the Bass rushed onto the stage, "That was beyond awesome."

"I guess there are some perks to having a high voice, huh," replied a smug Rick.

"That was so beautiful," Chef said over the intercom, "I usually don't like it when people use improv, but who cares, Ten out of Ten!"

The Bass cheered as Rick accepted his MVC award.

* * *

Heather was seething. Her team had just lost four straight challenges. Her alliance members, even Mandy, were slowly backing away from the Asian girl.

"So who should we vote out tonight?" Caitlin asked nervously.

"Gwen," Heather said curtly.

"No," Mandy said, "She is too popular, and she has never messed up."

"So who then?" asked an irate Heather.

"The person on our team who would have been at his peak of usefulness on this challenge, and then did not participate," Mandy said calmly. The other members of the alliance gained a look of shock, and then a smirk appeared on Heather's face.

* * *

"SO it has come down to you two," Chris said at that night's campfire ceremony. On one side was a still injured Kenny, and on the other, Trent, who seemed to have recovered. Both looked extremely nervous. The others were already eating their marshmallows.

Heather's smirk widened as she ate her marshmallow.

* * *

 **Heather:** It was incredibly easy to manipulate tonight's vote. My alliance had already agreed, Izzy is nuts, Shake and Meatwad are both idiots, Cartman and Kenny are friends so they were easy enough when I told them that Trent voted for Kenny, Caitlin convinced Nikki and Jonesy, and Owen, piece of cake.

 **Owen:** (Eating a large slice of cake) Ha ha, piece of cake.

* * *

"And the last marshmallow goes to…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…Kenny."

When Chris threw the marshmallow at Kenny, it hit him in the eye, causing him to flail around before falling into the fire.

"Aw come on," Chris muttered, "That is the second time today."

Trent sighed as he walked down the dock of shame. He should have known that his injuries would eventually come back to haunt him. Now he would never be able to use his nine step plan.

* * *

Geoff smiled as the Bass enjoyed the Karaoke Machine that had been their reward. Geoff had just woken up from his injury, as had the rest of the injured Bass. At the current moment, D.J. was preparing a puree of vegetables for Bridgette so she could eat something that would settle her stomach. He had to admit, D.J. was a wiz at cooking, especially after he used that special can full of, as D.J. called it, "Momma's Spice."

Geoff also smiled as he saw Gwen out the window. She was just sitting on the porch, sighing. He frowned, and told the others that he had to go use the restroom.

When he got outside, he walked up to Gwen, who gained a look of horror when she saw the injury on his head.

"What happened to you?" she asked.

"Not much," he said nonchalantly, before asking, "What is wrong with you?"

"I feel kind of bad about what happened to Trent," Gwen said, "he is really friendly, but he never got his chance to perform, and who knows how that could have changed what happened in today's challenge. He was also so friendly with me, he tried to be my friend, and he never called me a name, or made fun of me."

Geoff smile lessened when he heard Gwen's opinion Trent. Was it possible that Gwen liked Trent instead of him? He sighed before saying goodnight and returning to his cabin. Heather smirked when she saw the look on Geoff's face. Maybe she would not have to deal with a relationship between the cowboy and goth.

* * *

 **Losers:** _Courtney, Zim, Noah, Eva, Sadie, Justin, Billy, Rusty, Trent_

 _ **AN: Yes, the surprise victim of the curse was Trent. Sorry guys, but I actually did like the Gwen and Geoff relationship in the original story. Also, I couldn't resist having Rick sing Get Schwifty in this challenge. Well, thank you for reading, and good night.**_


	11. Chapter 11

Chris: Last time on Total Drama Island. The campers were forced to compete in a sing off. Along the way, about half the Bass team, Trent, Cartman, and of course Kenny, were injured. All of these injuries were at least partly caused by Heather. In the end, Rick won his first MVC award, and four straight wins for the Bass team. This meant that the commonly injured Trent was voted off. And Kenny was killed twice, what is up with that kid. Is he really that much of a danger magnet?

Will the Gophers finally break their losing streak?

Will Demon Izzy make reappearance?

And will Kenny ever actually live though an episode?

Find out now, on Total Drama Island!

* * *

 _(Cue Theme Song)_

* * *

A peaceful morning on Wawanakwa Island was interrupted by the sound of a chopper overhead. Chris smiled in his custom made rebel fighter pilot outfit. He went right over the cabins were the campers were sleeping.

In the Gopher girl cabin, Leshawna woke up after hearing the sound, while hitting her head on the bunk above her head. She angrily rubbed the back of her head, shouting "That dude is really starting to get on my last nerve."

Heather yawned as she woke up. She then turned to Lindsey and Beth. "GO warm up the shower for me," she ordered, and when they paused, she shouted, "Now!"

* * *

All of the girls were waiting outside the bathrooms, as Heather was taking her shower.

"What's the hold up?" Kim asked, holding her bladder.

"Heather needs her private time," Beth explained. The girls outside the alliance all scowled.

"How long is Queeny going to be in there?" Leshawna asked irritably.

"It still might be a while," Caitlin said, in obvious pain.

"That's it," Gwen said, throwing her hands into the air, before turning to the woods, "I am going lumberjack style."

Many of the girls stared at Gwen's retreating form, before they heard the intercom come on. "I hope you're ready for the most challenging challenge yet," Chris's voice said over the system, "Breakfast is in three minutes at the campfire pit."

Beth fearfully knocked on the washroom door. "Heather, we need to go," Beth said timidly.

"I'll be out, when I am ready!" The queen bee shouted, as all the girls then decided to do lumberjack style like Gwen.

* * *

Chris smiled as he saw the campers sitting in the campfire circle. "Are you ready for today's extreme challenge," he said.

"We are ready," Owen said excitedly. The others rolled their eyes at his excited attitude.

"Incoming," Chris shouted as he threw a can at the campers. When Ed caught it, they noticed it was a can of beans. "This is breakfast," Chris explained, not missing a beat.

"No," said an angry Heather, "Breakfast is crapes, croissants, even Chef's disgusting burnt eggs."

"Today's challenge," Chris said, ignoring the peanut gallery, "Is a game of survival," Chris pulled out a paintball gun, "Were going hunting."

"Is that a paintball gun?" Harold asked as he walked up to Chris.

"Why yes Harold," Chris pointed the gun at Harold, "It is." Chris shot the lanky nerd.

"So we won't actually be killing anything?" Bridgette asked cautiously. She just couldn't see her self killing a living creature.

"Negatory," Chris said, which caused Bridgette to smile, "This is the first ever paintball dear hunt. I'll announce the teams once we get into the woods, so finish Brekie, and get out there."

The campers heard a burp, and turned around to see that Owen had already eaten all of the beans.

* * *

 **Ed:** I am so hungry. (Pulls out a dog biscuit and eats it) That is better.

 **Andrew:** Okay, I may eat a little more than I should, but Owen needs to learn to control his appetite. He has already eaten a week's supply of beans.

* * *

"And now for the team break down," Chris said as he stood next to a board that held eight guns, six red, six green. He then grabbed the green weapons, and threw them at the Bass, "The Killer Bass Hunters are; Morty, Geoff, Rick, Peter, Homer, Bender, and Harold." They all caught their guns, all of them were smiling. "And for the Gophers; we have Izzy, Owen, Mandy, Leela, Lindsey, Beth, and Leshawna." They all also caught their guns. Chris then put on some red goggles. "You also get these stylin' glasses and wicked cameo cap."

Chris then turned to the campers who were not hunters, "The rest of you are deer." Chris then held up some antlers tied to a headband, and a red nose, "You will wear these, and," he suddenly turned around, showing he had a dear tail tied to the back of his belt, "cute little deer tails."

"I am not wearing that," scoffed Heather, as the other Gophers glared at her.

"There is no way I am a deer," Duncan muttered, before Chris suddenly put the antlers and nose on him.

"Take these off and your team is toast," Chris said with the smirk on his face growing. Duncan just stared at the nose and sighed. Owen then laughed as Duncan put on his tail.

"What are you laughing at?" Duncan asked in an incredibly angry voice.

"Nothing," Owen said, before pulling on Duncan's tail, "Bambi."

Duncan then grabbed Owen by the shirt, and said, "You better be a good shot Tubby."

* * *

 **D.J.:** We then went off on our own, and the deer were given a five minute head start.

 **Dib:** I think I will be good at this challenge; I am really good at camouflage.

* * *

The Bass deer were walking through the woods, all of them looking around hesitantly to see if any of the hunters had found them yet. D.J. then stopped, and said, "I don't know about you all, but I am out of here." He then turned around, crouched down, and began to bound off into the forest like a deer. Most of the Bass stared in shock, but Bridgette and Courage began to follow the gentle giant, and also headed into the forest.

"I am also off," Jack said as he jumped up into the trees, and disappeared from sight.

* * *

 **Duncan:** How did I get stuck on a team full of freaks?

* * *

"This may be the lamest thing I have done in my life," Gwen said as she walked along with the rest of the Gopher deer. Of them, only Cody was smiling.

"Oh, come on," he said, "It could be fun."

He stopped walking when he saw that all of the Gophers glared at him. He turned around and ran away from them, trying to make sure they would not kill him.

* * *

 **Cody:** (In a full body cast) I was so excited to be a deer. I may be small, but I am quick and agile. Lots of practice from dodging spit-balls in math class.

* * *

Heather sat down on a stump and filed her nails. The other Gophers stared at her. Jonesy then asked, "Are you coming?"

"No," Heather replied curtly, "I am going to wait for Lindsey, Beth, and Mandy to come and protect me from any hunters for the rest of the challenge."

"Isn't that against the rules?" Bojack asked.

"Do you see a rules person anywhere?" Heather asked the Horseman rhetorically, "Worry about your own fluffy tails." The remaining Gophers just walked away from the girl, more than a few of them hoped that Heather would be covered in paint by the end of the day.

* * *

"Hey Rick my man," Geoff asked through a shed door, "Why did you take all of our guns and go into the shed."

"Because, I'm turning these ordinary paint guns into the most badass weapon ever!" Rick explained. The Bass hunters knew it would be smart to just let Rick do what he thought would work best. Suddenly, the shed door opened, and all of the Bass gaped at the weapon that Rick had built.

"I almost feel bad for the Gophers," Homer said, before laughing stupidly.

* * *

The Gopher hunters were really excited, until they saw that Owen was covering himself in a yellow liquid in a jar. The others cringed as they realized he was covering himself in urine, to attempt to mask his scent. Izzy however, took the opportunity to steal Mandy's gun.

"Hey!" the evil girl shouted, "What the heck are you doing?"

When Izzy turned around, the others gasped. The evil flaming eyes had returned to her face. Demon Izzy was back! She then, in her devilish voice, shouted, "I am coming for you! Samurai Jack!"

As Izzy hopped her way back into the forest, still holding both guns, Owen squeaked, "I need a new pair of underwear."

* * *

Beth, Lindsey, and Mandy all were exhausted as they found Heather sitting on her stump. She angrily asked, "Where were you!"

"Trying to compete," Mandy angrily muttered.

"Whatever, go get me some berries," Heather said haughtily. Lindsey quickly ran off in search of the fruit. She then pointed to Beth, "GO get me some chips," she said.

Beth then looked at Heather confusedly, "In the forest."

"In the kitchen you idiot," Heather explained in an exasperated tone. As Beth walked off dejectedly, Mandy glared at Heather, daring her to try to boss her around. Heather glared back, though she did not say anything.

* * *

 **Beth:** Heather is so bossy. And in nature, the hunter would never get food for the deer. Heather won't hear this, right?

* * *

"I really do love this place," D.J. commented as he took a bite out of an apple.

He, Bridgette, and Courage were sitting in the meadow where they had found Bunny. They were all enjoying their apples and berries, as the boy and girl petted the dog. The two teenagers were so occupied with looking at one another; they failed to notice a large being moving threw the woods near bye.

"The hunter is a finely tuned machine," Owen whispered, as he spoke in third person, "His senses are heightened by the thrill of the chase." Owen then couched beneath a bush. "Suddenly the hunter spots a family of deer," Owen said, unknowingly revealing a pairing, "If he is to succeed, the hunter must show patience and control." Owen then farted, which the three deer heard, causing them to become more cautious.

* * *

Beth hid under a table that was outside of the dining hall. Chef suddenly slammed the door open. He then, in his swimming trunks, went to the lake. Beth hurriedly went inside the lodge, and searched for some chips.

* * *

Jack was quietly meditating in a tree, allowing himself and nature to become one. It was so perfect. A perfect opportunity that is.

Demon Izzy was silently sneaking from one tree to another. She was barely able to contain herself. She would finally be able to beat Samurai Jack. There was no way anything could go wrong. In a flash, she jumped out from behind a tree, let out a war cry, and fired a volley at the peaceful warrior. Just as it appeared that there was no way Jack could escape, he reached his hand over, and bulled a large branch in between himself and the paintballs. He then let go of the branch, which caused the paint that it had caught to be flung back at Demon Izzy, who was barely able to dodge.

As Jack took the opportunity to jump away, Izzy began to follow him closely, sometimes raising a gun to shoot a paintball at him, but it was ineffective. A grand chase was on, and the outcome is still up in the air.

* * *

Owen was still crouching behind the bush. After a few moments of alertness, the three Bass deer had gone back to eating their fruit. "The hunter moves in," Owen whispered to himself, "Aware of every photon in his environment." Owen took that opportunity to look down, where he saw a "Snake!"

When the three Bass deer heard this, D.J. allowed Bridgette and Courage to ride piggy back on him. As D.J. carried them, Owen began his pursuit. This chase, unlike the last one, was destined to be more comedic than serious.

* * *

 **Bridgette:** It was so nice of D.J. to carry me and Courage to safety. Course it was Owen who was chasing us. It would be a safer bet that a guy in crutches could out run us.

 **Owen:** I take offense to that.

* * *

Beth was just about to escape the dining hall, when she heard the door creak open. She quickly hid under the nearest table, and waited as Chef passed bye. Just as she was about to escape through the door, the plank underneath her feet cracked. Chef turned around, and looked mad as hell. Beth then took the opportunity to high-tail it out of the lodge. After running a few hundred yards, she stopped to take a breather.

* * *

 **Beth:** As I am running for my life from that maniac, I realize something; I am doing this for Heather! I don't even like her!

* * *

Beth then looked down at the chips. She smiled evilly, and then began to eat them.

* * *

Bridgette and Courage were being treated to a very bumpy ride as D.J. bounded left and right, dodging Owen's paint balls. The chubby teen had yet to give up, and they were nearing a creek.

D.J. suddenly crossed the creek by bouncing onto a rock in its center, and then jumping off onto the other side. Just as Owen attempted to use the rock as a stepping stone, he instead landed on the rock in a place that no man wants to be hit.

* * *

 **Courage:** (Winces in sympathy) Oh!

* * *

Beth was walking through the forest, an angry glare on her face. Suddenly a whisper came out form the woods. "Go ahead, shoot me," Beth said, "you can't make today any worse."

Cody then rushed out of the bushes. "You're a hunter, I'm a deer, slight food chain issue with me shooting you," he said thoughtfully, "How goes the hunting?"

"I am so sick of this game!" Beth shouted angrily.

"Did you bag any deer?" Cody asked.

"No," Beth replied, "but I did risk my life to steal a bag of chips."

"What took you so long?" Heather asked, as Beth and Cody walked into the clearing she was sitting in.

"Here," said Beth as she handed Heather the bag of chips, "I hope you know what I went through to get them."

"There are only eleven chips left," Heather said, before turning away in disgust, "and they're barbeque. Go exchange them for dill pickle."

Just as Beth bent down to pick up the bag, she stopped and said, "No!"

"What did you say," Heather asked angrily, as Mandy blinked in surprise. She never thought that Beth had it in her.

"I'm just going to…," Cody said quietly, before grabbing the chips running away.

"Take it back," Heather demanded.

"NO!" Beth shouted, "I am tired of being your slave. Now if you'll excuse me, I have a challenge to complete."

Heather just glared at the retreating farm girl, until she was hit with an orange paintball. "Whoever you are," Heather shouted into the woods, this is so not cool!"

* * *

"You cannot escape Samurai Jack," Demon Izzy shouted as she continued her chase. It had already been going on for half an hour and she had still not even landed one hit on the Bass deer. But instead of growing tired, Izzy actually grew more excited, this was a great hunt, and she had truly found wonderful prey.

Jack suddenly did an about face and began to run at Izzy. The demon girl smiled, this would be the perfect ending, him trying to attack her. Just as she raised her gun, Jack jumped up above her line of fire. The Japanese warrior then dived at Izzy, and with his sword drawn, sliced at the girl. Instead of hitting the girl however, he sliced her paintball gun, which caused the girl to become covered in paint.

It was then, dripping in paint; that Demon Izzy realized she had been beaten again. She then turned towards the retreating Samurai, and shouted, "CURSE YOU SAMURAI JACK!"

* * *

 **Izzy:** (Covered in paint) Izzy is really looking forward to the next time Izzy and Jack go toe to toe. And when that happens, my victory shall be glorious.

* * *

Brian smiled as he led Stewie, Bart, Early, Kenny, and Cartman through the woods. It was nearing the final hour of the challenge, and no sight of the Bass hunters had been made. Just as Brian let his guard down, a half dozen paintballs zoomed out of a bush, all landing on Early. The force of the paintballs was so great; he was thrown against a tree.

The other Gophers were stunned speechless when Rick walked out of the forest. But it wasn't Rick that was stupefying them. No, it was the large, six barrel, Gatling gun style, paintball gun. As Rick held up the massive weapon, he said in a fake German voice, "Asta la vista, Baby."

The barrels of Rick's gun began to rotate as they let out a flurry of paintballs. The five remaining Gopher's ran in different directions. That was not enough, as Rick was soon finished with Stewie and Bart, who was hit at least nine times and Bart about ten times. Brian was hurt even worse because he had run up to a tree, and was trapped in a hail of paint. Just as Cartman and Kenny were about to get away, Rick let out several paintballs, all of which impacted the Fat Boy from Denver.

"Save yourself Kenny!" Cartman said to Kenny. Kenny gladly took the overweight kids advice, and ran. Cartman then angrily shouted at the retreating boy, "Come back here and save me you fucking idiot!"

A shadow suddenly appeared above Cartman, and soon Rick let out another barrage of paint. When he was done, he smiled at his work. Five out of six wasn't bad, but there was still time to find more prey. He then went toward the nearest patch of woods, and resumed his search.

* * *

 **Andrew:** (Is dusting a new MVC medal) I hope Rick doesn't mind that we stopped using real copper in making these things. His team already has so many; we just didn't think that they should get more precious metals.

* * *

D.J. was getting tired. Normally, he would be easily able to out run Owen. But at the current moment, he was not only dodging the tubby boys paintballs, but was also carrying Bridgette, the girl whose heart he hoped to win, and Courage, the current receiver of most of the affection that Bridgette showed on the island. He realized that his idea of tiring out Owen by causing the chase to go up the mountain and onto the cliff was probably not the best one. He was also ticked off by Owen's constant narration of the situation. "The hunter's courage, and desire, will not be held back," the large Gopher panted as he chased the Bass trio up the hill.

Suddenly, D.J. stopped. They had reached the edge of the cliff, and Owen was standing right behind them. Owen then pointed his gun at the three, "You're mine now deer," Owen said while panting. Owen then pulled the trigger. A click was heard, but no paintball came out of the gun. Owen was out of ammo!

D.J. glared at the guy who had been chasing him for the past two hours, and walked up to the chubby teen. Owen then began to talk fearfully, as D.J. towered above him, "The hunter knows that his prey will stay there a moment, terrorized with fear and, um, respect." D.J. glared at Owen, before developing a smirk that even Chris would be proud of.

* * *

"AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

Owen screamed as he fell from the cliff. D.J., Bridgette, and Courage smiled as the chubby teen fell towards the lake. Bridgette then realized that the challenge would be over soon, and that they should begin to return to camp. D.J. smiled as Bridgette began to lead the way.

* * *

 **D.J.:** Man Bridgette looked so cute with that deer tail. She was even cuter than Bunny. Just the way it swayed back in forth when she walked. SO CUTE!

* * *

Heather was angrily walking down a path in the forest. Mandy was walking with her, though the girl was not saying much. The two suddenly came up to Lindsey, who was picking some berries from a bush. As Lindsey held them up, excitedly to Heather, the bossy girl slapped them away. Heather then ordered the blonde bombshell to follow her, and Lindsey complied.

* * *

Cody was smiling as he ate the bag of chips that Heather had thrown away. Unknowingly, he was leaving a small trail of chip crumbs; in the woods, where people have seen bears. Oh this can not be good.

* * *

Beth smiled as she put the sight of her paintball gun on Katie, who was oblivious to the farm girl. Just as Beth was about to pull the trigger, Heather called out to her. This alerted Katie, who fled as Beth turned to see Heather along with Mandy and Lindsey walking up to her.

"What do you want?" Beth asked in an exacerbated voice.

"We have decided to give you one last chance," Heather said haughtily, "Take back what you said and you will be allowed back into the alliance."

"No," Beth said, and then asked rhetorically, "Do you know why we keep losing challenges?"

"Because they are lame, and foolish," Heather replied as though it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"No," Beth said, "because you are so busy being mean, that you don't even try. All you can think of is bossing us around."

Heather angrily threw her deer nose at Beth, who angrily rolled up her sleeves.

* * *

"Are you sure this is okay Joe?" asked an African American, as he got out of his hybrid. He couldn't believe he had been talked into going on an afternoon visit to Northern Ontario, just so Joe could show him how to hunt.

"Sure Barry," Joe, an old man next to him said, "We are here in Canada to shoot some deer."

Barry, as this apparently forty-something African-American was called, still looked concerned. Joe then put his arm around Barry, and said, "Once you actually get to shoot a buck, you'll learn to love hunting."

Barack Hussein Obama sighed before joining his vice-president on the hunt. At least it got him away from the office for a day.

* * *

"You can throw me over a cliff," Owen said, as he poured water out of his cap, "You can leave the hunter with less ammo than he thought he had, but nothing will destroy the hunter's spirit!"

Owen then saw Duncan walking on the other side of a grove of woods. "Fresh meat," Owen said as he rubbed his hands together.

* * *

Heather glared at Beth. "I am giving you one last chance to take it back," Heather said, as she argued with Beth, Lindsey and Mandy looked back and forth, both with looks of mild worry covering their faces. Suddenly, an orange paintball shot out of the woods, and hit Heather in the back of her neck. The four turned around to see Leshawna walk up, carrying her gun.

"Sorry," Leshawna as she walked up, "I knew I should have gone to the optometrist before coming out here."

"You," Heather seethed, before turning to Beth and shouted, "Give me your gun!" Beth responded by shooting Heather in the hamstring, giving the bossy girl a charley horse, and making her fall to the ground.

"Girl, you crazy," Leshawna said happily, as she and Beth hugged.

"It just looked like a lot of fun when you did it," Beth laughed.

"This is not funny!" Heather shouted from the ground.

* * *

Duncan bent down to scoop up some water as he sat near a stream. He was completely oblivious to Owen, who was hiding in the tree that was next him.

"This is the shot of the day," Owen monologue quietly, "With one paintball; hunter's and prey's mutual destiny will be fulfilled." Owen then pointed his gun at the jail bird, only to fart. Duncan sniffed the air and stood up.

"Beans," Duncan said, before looking up into the tree, "Owen! Nice try Farticus, but you'll have to do better than that."

Owen, who was trying to climb down so he could chase Duncan, fell off the limb, and farted again.

* * *

Cody was happily chewing away at the bag of chips. He reached his hand into the bag, and realized that only crumbs were left over. He was walking down the path confidently. Not a single Bass member had seen him.

* * *

 **Cody:** (In full body cast) I thought it was a synch to win this challenge. I got through the entire day without getting hit with a single paintball.

* * *

Cody then looked on the ground, and spotted the large pile of berries that Lindsey had collected. Just as he bent down to pick them up, he heard a low growl. He turned around to see none other than the Bear. Bear had yellow crumbs covering his face, showing that he had been eating the crumb trail that Cody had dropped.

"Hey big fella," Cody said, before showing the pile of berries to the bear, "Want some berries."

The Bear roared at the techno geek.

* * *

 **Bear:** (He is wearing Cody's deer outfit, while heating the remaining crumbs from the chip bag. When the bag runs out, he frowns. He speaks in English subtitles.) Guess it is back to salmon and shrubs.

* * *

Heather had somehow managed to pull herself up after being shot. She then swiped Lindsey's gun, and fired at Leshawna and Beth. The two angrily turned toward the queen bee. "It is so on now," Beth growled, and the three gopher girls began to shoot one another.

* * *

Gwen sighed as she waited for the challenge to end. As she leaned against the tree, she was unable to notice Geoff sneaking up on her. The party guy smiled as he saw Gwen, and ran over to see her. "Hey Gwen," Geoff said excitedly.

"Oh," said Gwen, who suddenly regained focus on the world, "Hey Geoff." Gwen then noticed something odd, "Where is your gun?"

"Rick is using it in his invention," Geoff said, while shaking his head, "I almost feel sorry for those Gopher deer."

Gwen stared blankly at Geoff, suddenly feeling more than mildly afraid to be wearing her fluffy white deer tail.

* * *

Rick quietly moved in the bushes. He heard several voices in a clearing on the opposite side of the brush. When he looked over the top on the hedge, he was confused to find Heather, Lindsey, Beth, Mandy, and Leshawna shooting each other. Weren't they on the same team?

Rick ignored his own question, and let lose a cannonade from his paintball machine gun. He smiled as he covered all five Gopher girls in paint. "I am feeling the motherfucking adrenaline! Baby!" He shouted as the paintballs left the barrels of his gun.

"Attention human wild life and hunters," Chris said over the intercom, "The challenge is over. Get your butts back to camp so we can judge your performance and tally up the scores."

* * *

"Tsk, tsk, tsk," Chris said as he paced back in forth in front of the Gophers. Cody was in a body cast after his encounter with the bear, and Kenny was still missing after fleeing Rick. Chris then angrily chided the Gopher team. "Stealing from Chef," Chris said while listing the grievances that the Gophers had committed, "Eating chips in the woods, being mauled by bears."

* * *

 **Andrew:** I personally didn't think that last one was their fault.

* * *

"Do you know what I see here?" Chris asked rhetorically, "I see a very undisciplined group, I see a disgraceful mess, I see a gross misuse of paint products. And I have to say," Chris said, before laughing out loud, "THAT WAS AWESOME! When you guys started to shoot each other, that was so wicked!"

"Has anyone seen Kenny?" Stan asked worriedly.

"We do have cameras stationed around the island," Andrew said as he suddenly turned on a rather large screen that came from the hospital tent, "I think we can find him."

In less than a second, the screen turned on, showing Kenny walking through the woods. He suddenly waved to the screen, only for a bang to be heard. Kenny's head suddenly was blown from his body, and the cast stared in horror. Suddenly Joe and Barry ran up to the corpse of Kenny.

"See mister president," Joe said, "hunting can be fun."

"I guess you're right," said Obama, "But it is a really small deer, now let's get back so I can feel Connie's flappy dappy ass."

The screen then died away. The campers were all shocked.

"Oh my God!" Morty shouted, "The Democrats killed Kenny!"

"Those Bastards!" Homer shouted angrily, "I am never voting for them again!"

As many of the campers nodded their heads, Brian slowly hid his "Obama" pin under a rock. Chris then coughed, bringing the attention back to himself.

"I have to say the Bass one again," he said, "Seeing as not a single one of then has a speck of paint on their person, and over half the Gophers do. Gophers see you tonight."

The Bass cheered as Rick again received the MVC award. The Gophers looked on in disbelief; they had lost four times in a row.

XzZZZzttX

 **Cody:** Okay, I know I got mauled by a bear, but I am a quick healer, and Heather is as mean as a rattlesnake. They would never vote me off.

 **Leshawna:** Who did I vote for? Heather has been a pain in my butt since day one, but I have to say, Cody.

 **Owen:** Yeah that Cody, not so useful in challenges any more.

 **Cartman:** Any douchebag who can't out run a-(Sloppy Joe Monster begins attack again) Let go of me you meat from hell!

 **Izzy:** (The confession cam is covered in blood) Why is this place always covered in blood? Chef really needs to learn to clean better.

 **Lindsey:** I totally admire Belle for sticking up to Heather, but she is so dead now.

* * *

"There are only eighteen marshmallows here tonight," Chris said as he held up a plate, "The camper who-"

"Does not receive a marshmallow, will walk the dock of shame, take a ride on the boat of losers, and be forced to leave camp," Gwen said, "Try to stop being so predictable."

"Fine," Chris said, "Gwen, Lindsey, Cartman, Kenny, Brian, Stewie, Bart, Early, Izzy, Owen, Jonesy, Caitlin, Nikki, Bojack, Fry, Leela, Leshawna, Shake, Frylock, Meatwad, Mandy all did not receive a vote."

All of the campers caught their marshmallow when their name was called out. That left only Beth, Heather, and Cody. Heather than gestured at Beth by moving her finger across her neck, only to be shocked when Chris said, "Beth," and the farm girl received her marshmallow.

"SO it comes down to Heather versus Cody. And the final marshmallow goes to…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…Heather."

"You are all lucky," Heather said, as she caught her marshmallow, "Very lucky."

Cody sighed as he rolled his wheelchair down the dock. Unfortunately, it gained too much momentum, and hurtled of the dock. When the Gophers heard a splash, Andrew and Chef ran over to the edge of the dock, trying to save the techno-geek. The Gophers sighed as they returned to their cabins. They were forced to ignore the sounds of partying, coming from the Bass cabin.

* * *

 **Losers:** _Courtney, Zim, Noah, Eva, Sadie, Justin, Billy, Rusty, Trent, Cody_

 _ **AN: Hope you enjoyed!**_


	12. Chapter 12

Chris: Last time on Total Drama Island. The campers competed in a paintball deer hunt. Jack out smarted Izzy, again, D.J. continued his plans to woo Bridgette by tossing Owen off a cliff, and Barack Obama killed Kenny. A split was caused in Heather's alliance, as Beth finally had the guts to stand up to Heather. Rick, with his seriously tricked out paintball gun, managed to take out half the Gopher team, allowing the Bass to win a fourth challenge straight. It was Cody, who had been attacked by a bear, who was voted off, barely losing to Heather, who received the second most votes.

Will the Gophers find out about the tikki idol that Beth stole?

Will they finally vote off Heather?

And will any of the viewers ever vote Democrat after what they have seen on the last challenge?

Find out now, on Total Drama Island!

* * *

 _(Cue theme song)_

* * *

"Messy, messy, messy," Double D growled as he was folding some underwear he had found on the floor of the Bass cabin. He really should talk to Harold about this, but he did not want to intrude to the lanky nerd's life. So he decided he would do what he did best, clean.

Duncan, who had just woken up, shook his head and gasped as he saw what was on the floor.

"GROSS! Harold, what did I say about leaving your disgusting underwear around the cabin?"

Harold scowled "it's not mine."

Geoff raised an eyebrow and picked up the underwear "dude, it has your name on it."

Indeed, the underwear had the word 'Harold' stitched on them.

Harold just rolled his eyes "whatever. I'm gonna take a shower."

Harold grabbed his towed and clothes, then walked off.

Zeke blinked "I don't get it eh. What's the problem?"

Duncan growled "What do you mean what's the problem? Do you have any idea how unbelievably disgusting that is?"

Grim shrugged "so he's got some hygiene issues, big deal."

Duncan then grinned "I think Harold needs to be taught a lesson."

Geoff scowled "heck no, unlike you Duncan, I don't claw at any excuse to bully someone."

Duncan scowled "seriously, it's not bullying, it's called 'teaching someone some personal hygiene lessons'.

Morty scowled "anything you wanna try, I'm not gonna get involved."

Zeke nodded "me too eh."

The five walked off with Duncan left by himself.

"Aw well, who needs them, I can get back at him all by myself."

* * *

Both teams were standing out on the beach, waiting for Chris to announce the next challenge to them. Chris walked up to them, wearing a now familiar sadistic smile on his face.

"Today's challenge will test your minds, your teamwork and," Chris paused for a second to add dramatic effect, "Your skills in the kitchen. You will be cooking a four course meal, and serving it to me. Each team will appoint a head chef, to create the theme of the meal, and over see the cooking."

"To cook," Chris continued, "You will need ingredients." Suddenly a truck backed out of the lake. "Grab your food from the truck, and get cooking." When the teams moved towards the truck, a dolphin stuck its head out from the driver's seat, and waved to them. Bridgette happily waved back to the marine mammal.

* * *

 **Bridgette:** I loved dolphins ever since I was four. My mom took me out to try to teach me how to surf. But I got caught in the riptide, and almost drowned. Just as I went under, a dolphin came up to me and carried me back to shore. Ever since then, I always promised myself that I would help protect dolphins no matter what.

* * *

When the Bass opened the doors to the back of the semi, they were greeted with the sight of some of the most delicious looking food they had ever seen. "Why the hell have we never seen any of this food?" Stan asked in anger.

"Who cares," Geoff shouted, "We can do a killer Italian theme."

"Hello head chef," Grim said happily. All of the other Bass nodded their heads happily.

"Seriously," Geoff asked. When the others nodded, he said, "Let's get grabbin."

* * *

 **Double D:** I am a very good cook, but I don't think I have the leadership skills that Geoff posses. He has already proven himself to us; he did get Duncan to participate in the dodge-ball challenge.

* * *

As the Bass were unloading the food they were using for their dish, Heather was already announcing herself as the head chef. Leshawna glared angrily at the queen bee, as Heather snapped at Beth to do everything her way.

* * *

 **Heather:** I had to take the lead. Hello people were on a losing streak, and the others are pretty useless.

* * *

Both teams had grabbed the food they needed to make Chris his meal. The two teams went to the kitchens in the back of the mess hall, and went into different rooms. Homer and Peter had attempted to eat some of the Bass's supplies, but were stopped before they could even take a bite.

In the Bass kitchen, they were trying to decide what to do for their meals. "Okay," Geoff said, "We got four courses, so let's start with the appetizer, antipasto," Geoff then looked around to see the other's reaction, "Harold, you, Katie, Dib, Eddy, Jack and Wyatt make it. Well try to have about five people per cooking group."

"I can make pasta sauce;" D.J. said excitedly, "I always helped my mom cook dinner."

"Okay," Geoff said with a large smile, "D.J.; you will be in charge of pasta along with Bridgette, Courage, Double D, Stan, and Kyle." The five Bass members all high fived when they got their assignment."

"For the meat dish," Geoff continued, "I think that veal would be acceptable Italian, wouldn't you. Since this is probably the hardest to make, I say we let Morty handle it, since he is our good luck charm." The scrawny boy blushed at receiving the praise, though Duncan glared at him. Geoff continued, "I think Rick, Grim, Kim, Ron, and Jen should help you with this one."

"And for dessert," Geoff smiled as he laid his eyes on the victim of his prank, "Duncan, Ezekiel, Tyler, Ed, Jude, and Bender will make canoliis."

As the groups began to gather in their areas of the kitchen, Peter and Homer came up to the Cowboy of a head chef. "Why weren't we assigned to a group?" Peter asked Geoff. Geoff gave them a devious smile.

"I have a very special assignment for you two," Geoff said as he put his arms around the two fat men's shoulders. He then led them to the freezer door, and opened it. "I want you guys to check and see if anything is stored in there." Both Peter and Homer went inside the giant freezer, and looked around.

"I don't see any-hey!" Peter shouted as Geoff closed the door of the freezer. When the other members of the Bass stared at the cowboy, he shrugged.

"Do any of you honestly trust those two anywhere near a kitchen full of tasty food?" he asked. All of the Bass sighed and shook their heads. Geoff was right. If they had actually been allowed to help, who knows what could happen to their dishes.

* * *

 **Peter:** (Is completely blue from staying in the freezer) Man that was colder than that time I froze my nuts.

* * *

 _(Cue Cutaway)_

 _Scrat, the squirrel from Ice Age was trying to pull an acorn out of a frozen glacier. Suddenly, he heard Peter shout at him._

" _No, bad squirrel" Peter shouted, "Those are my nuts, my nuts!" He suddenly saw how skinny Scrat was and cooed, "Aw you're just a hungry little guy aren't you?" Scrat suddenly attempted to pull out the nut again, "but those are my nuts."_

 _Scrat, suddenly jumped up on to Peter, and attacked him. Peter screamed, "My nuts! My nuts!"_

 _(End Cutaway)_

* * *

 **Peter:** It is good to do gags like that again.

* * *

Duncan smirked as he saw that the food was coming along nicely. He suddenly heard someone whisper his name. He looked over to see Bender standing at the door. Grim gave Duncan thumbs up, and showed the cowboy a stick that held a pair of white boxers. Duncan smirked, realizing that Bender had already gotten rid of most of Harold's clothes. Phase one was under way. Duncan then gave the thumbs up to Eddy, who was holding a pot of water. "Where do you want the water Double-oops!" the Ed-boy shouted as he suddenly bumped into Harold, splashing water all over the nerd's clothes.

"Nice move, Dorkahontas!" Harold shouted.

"You better go get changed bro," Geoff said, gesturing the cabin. Harold walked back to the cabin. Duncan and Bender pumped each other's fist, while laughing. They didn't notice Geoff glaring at them behind their backs.

* * *

"Gwen, Lindsey, Cartman, Shake, Frylock, Leela, you will handle the citrus upside-down cake flambé," Heather said, as she listed the duties for the Gopher cooks.

"Do any of you know how to make an upside-down flamer thingy?" Lindsey asked. She was answered in silence.

Owen, who was carrying a large crate of oranges, suddenly came through the door. When he hit Heather, he dropped his entire payload of oranges, and slipped on them. Heather glared at the large teen. "Go back to the truck, and get some more oranges," she said. Owen sighed as he headed back to the beach. Heather then turned to Brian, "Brian, you Stewie, Fry, Meatwad, Early, and Owen will handle ribs." The dog nodded his head, and began to get out the barbeque sauce.

Heather then turned to Izzy, "Izzy, you are in charge of making the spit-roast pig. You will be joined by Jonesy, Caitlin, Bojack, and Kenny."

"Right-o!" Izzy shouted, as she pulled out the pig. Beth visibly cringed when she saw the porker still mostly intact.

"Leshawna, Beth, Nikki, and Mandy," Heather said as she read out the appetizer, "You are on pineapple skewers and mango dip."

"Girl let me handle the appetizers," Leshawna said, "I know how to make a pineapple chunky that would melt the sauce off the devil!"

"Well that is just great," Heather said sarcastically, "but I am in charge, and my plan is pineapples with little sticks through them." Leshawna glared at Heather as the queen bee walked off.

* * *

Harold was currently rummaging through his drawer. "Where the heck is all my stuff!" he shouted angrily. After several moments, he saw that he was left with only one outfit. "I don't believe it," he sighed tiredly, "this day can't get any worse?" Duncan, who was outside the cabin, snickered.

* * *

 **Duncan:** (In Bugs Bunny voice) He don't know me very well, do he?

* * *

Owen was rushing back to the kitchen. In his hands was another crate of oranges. The oranges were packed up so high; he could not see where he was going. This unfortunately caused him to crash into a tree. Even worse, the tree he ran into was occupied by a nest of bees. The bees did not enjoy being knocked around, and proceed to attack Owen. Owen screamed in pain as he fled from the angry insects.

* * *

"Let us the hell out!" Peter shouted from the freezer, as he and Homer banged on the door. The others tried their best to ignore the screams. Bridgette was smiling as D.J. mixed spices and sliced up tomatoes to create his pasta sauce. Here in the kitchen, D.J. seemed to be completely in his element. He showed no fear, handling all the devices in the kitchen with ease.

"You must really like cooking," Bridgette said as she tried to engage in small talk. D.J. smiled as he seemed to reminisce about something.

"Yeah," D.J. uttered happily, "My Momma taught me how to do it when I was little. She always told me that "the best way to make friends with a person is through their stomach." Ever since then, I always loved to cook, especially," D.J. held up a small can in his hand, "With Momma Spice." Bridgette watched, as D.J. poured some of the contents of the jar into the sauce, and was shocked to see a puff of pink smoke come out from sauce. When Bridgette took a spoon, and scooped some of the sauce into her mouth, her eyes widened.

* * *

 **Bridgette:** (Drooling) That was the best tasting food I have ever eaten.

 **D.J.:** (Holding can of Momma Spice) I love my Momma.

 **Chef:** That D.J. is not tough enough! Sure nature girl likes him, but he won't get any respect with so little pride in himself. I will need to find a way to teach him to be a man eventually. Not now though, that producer is watching me like a hawk.

* * *

"I got the oranges everybody!" Owen shouted. He was covered in bee stings. He then threw the crate of oranges at Gwen, who dodged it. Kenny, who was right behind her, was not so lucky. Kenny was crushed when the crate smashed his body into the wall. The Gopher team stared in shock.

"Oh my God!" Caitlin murmured, before pointing at Owen, "You killed Kenny!"

"You Bastard!" Izzy shouted. The psycho-girl grabbed the splint that had been meant to be used as a part of the roasted pig, and chased after Owen angrily. Cartman laughed at them until the Sloppy Joe Monster jumped out from the crate and attacked his face.

* * *

 **Heather:** Everything is going great, except for Owen's hornet stings, and Kenny being killed again, which took him out of the challenge. But still, we are so going to win this challenge. (Sighs)

 **Izzy:** How dare Owen kill Kenny. He is now on my list, along with the head of the RCMP, Chris, Heather, and Barack Obama.

 **Cartman:** I hate that fucking thing! Why the hell does it always attack me?!

* * *

The teams soon turned around and saw Harold walking into the kitchen, wearing a red thong.

Duncan and Bender were laughing hysterically at the sight.

Harold growled "real mature. GOSH!"

Kim raised an eyebrow "what happened?"

"I tried to get new pants." Harold answered, then glared at the laughing duo "until SOMEONE took all my pant's."

The two stopped laughing when they realized they were the only one's who were laughing.

Duncan glared fiercely at the rest of the Bass and snapped "what the hell?! Can't any of you take a joke!?"

Kim scowled "that was supposed to be funny?"

* * *

 **Harold:** Idiots!

* * *

"These pineapple slices are uneven," Heather said as she pointed at Beth, "Leshawna, switch places with Beth."

"What are you talking about?" Leshawna said in an annoyed voice, "They look fine to me."

"I didn't get to be head chef by being sloppy at presentation," Heather said haughtily.

"No," Leshawna said as she got up into Heather's face, "You got it because you called it."

"Are you going to be a team player or not?" Heather asked loudly. Leshawna growled at the girl.

"Oh I am a team player alright, but I am also allergic to pineapples," Leshawna cried.

"Just get slicing," Heather said, while turning away from the ghetto girl. Leshawna then angrily began to cut up the pineapples, only to gasp when she saw her arms. They were covered in orange blotches. Leshawna walked up to Heather.

"Yo," she said, showing Heather her arms, "What should I do about this?"

"I recommend you scratch after the challenge," Heather said vindictively, "Get back to work."

Leshawna attempted to lunge at Heather, while the other Gopher girls attempted to hold her back. This situation appeared ready to blow.

* * *

"Give me back my pants you jerks!" Harold shouted at the Bass members, all of whom were laughing at the jail bird.

"Fine," Duncan said calmly, "there is a fresh pair of boxers and shorts waiting for you back in the cabin."

Morty walked up "I'll go with you."

Duncan frowned playfully "Don't you trust me?"

"You really don't want me to answer that."

The two walked off to the Bass cabin. Duncan soon burst out laughing when he held up a bottle of hot sauce. His laughing increased in volume when they heard Harold screams and a loud splash.

* * *

 **Morty:** (sighing and face palming) What an asshole.

* * *

"What's wrong?" Heather asked the flambé team. Lindsey was just sadly staring at the cake.

"We used all the flambé starter, but it won't flambé," Lindsey said sadly.

"Nothing happened when you lit it?" asked a shocked Heather.

"Oh," Lindsey said, a look of realization appearing on her face. Many of the Gophers slapped their heads in frustration.

* * *

 **Heather:** It is like talking to an eggplant.

 **Brian:** And I thought that my ex-girlfriend was slow. But, she did not have the kind of body that Lindsey has. Balances it out really.

* * *

"Pay attention boys and girls," Heather said as she pulled out and lit a match, "There are two steps to making a flambé. Step one, pour the flambé liquid, which you did manage," Gwen glared at the Queen bee as Heather put the match near the cake, "Step two is to light."

The flambé exploded on Heather, covering her in a coat of ash. It also completely incinerated her eyebrows. Heather screamed, alerting the entire kitchen to her plight. She then grabbed Owen by the collar.

"You will go get me my make up bag!" she shouted.

"But," Owen said fearfully, "the bees."

"Now!" Heather shouted. Owen, who saw the frying pan that Heather was carrying, began the journey to the cabin. Leshawna suddenly tapped Heather's shoulder.

"I need a bathroom break," she said, gesturing her blotchy arms.

"Well I need new eyebrows," Heather said angrily, "So we both have needs."

* * *

 **Leshawna:** That is it! Someone has got to teach this girl a little respect.

* * *

Harold and Morty just walked into the kitchen with Harold wearing a pair of light brown pajamas.

Duncan snickered "nice jammies"

Geoff noticed his attire and frowned in concern "What happened?"

Morty pinched the bridge of his nose in annoyance "You don't wanna know."

"This is all I have left." Harold said flatly "so if you sickos want to see my butt naked, hit me with your best shot."

Duncan smirked and said "Then just admit to stop leaving your underwear out all over the cabin."

"It's. Not. Mine."

Duncan rolled his eyes in exasperation "It has your name on it."

Harold stayed silent and was about to walk way until he was stopped by Geoff holding up a plate of sandwiches "Alright guys, let's take a break. I made some sandwiches so we can eat while we work."

Harold grinned and picked up the nearest sandwich "Sweet! I'm seriously starving." He then took a bite out of it and chewed something that felt rubbery. He gasped and looked inside the sandwich to see a pair of his underwear inside it.

He yelled and threw it to the side. But the underwear fell into Lindsay's lap, who then screamed and ran out the Mess Hall.

The rest of the Bass glared at Geoff, who to their surprise, looked confused then looked to Duncan "Did you put that there?"

Duncan shrugged "big deal, we'll give him his pants and stuff back when he admits his friggin guilt."

Harold only narrowed his eyes and went back to his station.

Bridgette growled out, to Duncan's surprise "that wasn't funny. Your just a creep."

Duncan casually waved her off "lighten up Malibu, it's just friendly competition."

He then turned to Geoff and saw that he was also frowning "Dude, that _was_ a little harsh."

Duncan just rolled his eyes and went back to his station "Do I _look_ like I care?"

* * *

Owen was so freaked out. He was trying to sneak back into the Gopher cabin, without attracting the hornets. While he snuck onto the side of the cabin, he noticed another hornets nest above his head. As he stepped towards the door, he stepped on a rake, which suddenly came up to hit him in the face. After being hit in the face, he stepped back, and was hit in the face by another rake. While stepping away from that rake, he hit another and hit his face again. After repeating the process fourteen times, he hit the wall of the cabin, causing the hornets nest to fall on his head. "Aw come on!" he shouted in frustration.

* * *

As the Gophers were attempting to fix their dishes, Owen came running in, covered in bee stings. He had also managed to grab Heather's make up bag. Just as she was about to take it from him, Leshawna stepped in between Heather and Owen, and grabbed the bag. The Gopher girls began a game of monkey in the middle, and were successfully keeping the bag away from Heather. Eventually, Beth threw it to Lindsey, who after a moment of thought; threw it into the freezer. When Heather went inside the giant cooler to retrieve it, Leshawna closed the door on her.

"Let me out of here!" she shouted at the door. Lindsey, Beth, Gwen, and Leshawna were all listening to the queen bee through the door.

"You don't think she will be too mad at us?" Lindsey asked. Heather then punched the door, causing large dents in it.

"I will destroy you!" the freezing girl shouted.

"She'll get over it," Leshawna said, while laughing, "the girl needs to learn how to chill."

* * *

Beth smiled as she placed her lucky tikki doll in a ring of flowers. It was on the dining room table, where Chris was sitting. On the other side of the table, Geoff lit a candelabrum and prepared to get the Bass's Italian dish. Chris smirked as he prepared to eat the meals. This job had more perks than just a big salary.

* * *

Leshawna smiled when she saw the meal saw done. The pineapple appetizer looked great, the ribs were covered in a great sauce, and the roasted pig had the customary apple in its mouth. "Owen guard the food, the rest of you, lets go get cleaned up," she said as she and everyone besides Owen walked out of the kitchen. Owen sniffed the ribs and drooled.

* * *

Heather was not enjoying her time in the freezer. As she shivered, she began to reapply her eyebrows.

* * *

"What is that Mr. ribs," Owen said as he looked at the barbequed bones with meat, "You feel a little lopsided," he then grabbed a rib, and devoured it. His eyes opened widely as he ate one of the ribs. "Oh momma that's good," he moaned, and then grabbed another rib. This will not go well.

* * *

Chris chewed a little as he ate the antipasto. "This is great," he said, "six out of ten." Harold smiled at his good score. D.J. then passed his plate of pasta to Chris, who slurped up a noodle, and then cried. "I have never had such good pasta," he said with tears in his eyes, "ten out of ten!" Bridgette and D.J. high-fived when they heard their perfect score.

Double D then carried in their veal. It was covered in gravy and tomato sauce. When Chris ate a piece of it, he contemplated the score for a second, and said, "Seven." Double D seemed pleased with the score.

"The Bass now have a score of twenty-three," Chris said to the camera, "And the Gopher's appetizer was worth nine points. How will the Gophers try to make this challenge more exciting now?"

Leshawna held out her hands in presentation. When no one came through the door to the kitchen, she stuck her head inside it. She was shocked to see that Owen was covered in barbeque sauce and that the ribs were completely picked clean. "Tell me that you did not just eat that entire plate of ribs!" she shouted at the chubby boy.

Owen rushed out of the kitchen, the set of bones that used to be ribs on his plate. When he placed it in front of Chris, the host looked in shock at Owen.

"This looks like it has been eaten," Chris said. Owen then pointed to a small piece of meat attached to one of the bones.

"There is a tiny chunk left," he said.

Chris picked up the small piece of meat, and ate it. "You know what," he said, "I've had worse. Two points, sorry Owen. The Bass still lead 23 to 11 and the Gophers still have their roasted pig. Bring it out please." Izzy giggled as she brought out the large porker. Chris took a bit out of the meat, and said, "Great job Izzy, eight points!" Izzy shouted excitedly as the Gophers cheered. They were not out of this challenge yet.

Chris grabbed one of the Bass's canoliis, and ate a bite of it. He thought about it for a moment, and said, "Six." The people who made the dessert all looked down in anger; they were ashamed to have such a low score.

He then smiled broadly at the cake that the Gophers had prepared. "I have to say," he said to an excited Gwen, "This looks like a winner." When he poked his fork into the cake, it fell apart into a pile of ash. When Chris put a piece of ash in his mouth, he started to choke. Owen was forced to use the Heimlich maneuver on the host. "What the heck is this?" Chris exclaimed.

"It is Heather's recipe," Lindsey explained, "Oh no; she is still in the freezer!" Lindsey went to the kitchen to let her alliance leader out.

"Freezer," Geoff said, as something dawned on him, "Peter, Homer are you alright?" He then ran over to let the fat men out of the Bass freezer.

Everyone looked horrified when Peter, Homer, and Heather emerged, all of them completely blue. Heather looked around. "Is it over?" she asked Chris.

"Yep," Chris said, "Bass win 29 to 20, and it's not just cause I almost died, the ribs sucked too."

"That's just great," Heather growled, "Why do we keep losing people?" She then turned to the tikki that was on the table, "And what the heck is this?"

"I brought it back as a souvenir," Beth explained as she grabbed it, "from the other island."

All of the people in the room gasped. "You mean boney island," Asked Chris, "The Island I specifically said not to bring anything back from."

"I didn't know," Beth cried, "I'll put it back." She rushed from the cabin, carrying the idol on her way back to the other island.

"That explains the bad mojo I have been feeling coming from them," Grim said in an enlightened tone.

"And the Bass win their promised reward," Chris said happily, "A five star dinner under the stars." The Bass cheered, and D.J. lifted Bridgette up in his arms happily. Geoff turned around, and frowned when he saw that Gwen was just looking sadly at the ground.

* * *

"So who should we vote off," Owen asked his teammates. They, minus Heather, were sitting on the porch of their cabin.

"Heather has got to go," Leshawna said with obvious anger. Owen nodded.

"Yeah," he said, "but Beth cursed us with that wooden tikki doll of her's."

"True," Leshawna said, before putting her hands together, "Dear curse, please hit Heather next. And if at all possible, hit her upside the head."

* * *

 **Heather** : Today's vote was really hard, but only because there were so many annoying people to choose from.

 **Lindsay** : I can't believe we locked her in the fridge! That was so cool! ... She's not going to see this, is she?

 **Heather** : Leshawna is a royal pain in the butt, and Owen completely screwed up everything for us!

 **Lindsay** : Her eyebrows look so bad. I'd kind of like to vote Heather off, but...

 **Heather** : I vote for Beth.

 **Owen** : _(burps)_ Beth.

 **Gwen:** Heather, she has been trying to get me voted off for a while, and I don't like that.

* * *

"I got twenty-one marshmallows here," Chris said, "One of you will not receive one of them."

"Leshawna, Owen, Lindsey, Gwen, Leela, Fry, Cartman, Kenny, Shake, Frylock, Bart, Izzy, Jonesy, Nikki, Early, Meatwad, Caitlin, Bojack, Stewie, and Brain did not receive a vote." He suddenly threw the marshmallows at the contestants, all of whom were glad to see themselves get some marshmallows.

"I only have one marshmallow left," Chris said to Beth and Heather, "And it goes to…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…Heather."

"Bye Cursey," Heather said, as she ate her marshmallow. Leshawna glared daggers at Heather, as Beth hugged her goodbye.

"You guys might want to burn some sage when you get back to your cabin," Chris advised, "The curse might still be around."

"Cool," Leshawna said, "Will Chef give us some sage?"

"No," Chris said flatly, "So good luck with that."

* * *

Geoff smiled as he waited for Gwen on the dock. He looked fondly at his first MVC medal, proud that he had led the Bass to victory. When Gwen walked up, she was frowning. "What are you doing here?" she asked, "Shouldn't you be enjoying dinner with your teammates?"

"I thought you might like some actual food," Geoff said, revealing a basket that held a chicken leg and small roll. Gwen smiled as she took a bite of the chicken and looked back at the cabin. She then noticed something odd.

"Why are Grim and Rick carrying a bunk to the dock this late at night?" she asked Geoff, who burst out laughing. Gwen then realized that Duncan was sleeping in the bed.

"Do you think you could get the girls to all go out swimming tomorrow morning before he wakes up?" he asked. Gwen smiled and nodded.

* * *

Duncan lazily opened his eyes and got out of bed. He suddenly realized he was no longer in his cabin, but at the dock. He then also realized that girls were in the water, and that he was naked and as to add insult to injury, Rick arrived in his ship and dumped sewage all over the punk. He ran back to the cabin screaming, as Geoff, Morty, and Harold, who were on a canoe on the lake, all burst out laughing at him. Hopefully Duncan had learned his lesson. Never mess with Harold and his friends.

* * *

 **Losers:** Courtney, Zim, Noah, Eva, Sadie, Justin, Billy, Rusty, Trent, Cody, Beth"

 _ **AN: So for this chapter, I had Duncan actually receive his comeuppance unlike in the original episode. I hope you enjoyed and I'll see you next chapter.**_


	13. Chapter 13

Chris: Last time on Total Drama Island. The campers faced off in a cook off. The Bass decided to give Duncan a taste of his own medicine when hr bullied Harold. The real action happened in the Gopher team, as Heather proved to be too bossy for even Lindsey to take. Kenny was smashed by a crate, Heather was thrown in a freezer, and in the end, Beth was voted off for bringing a curse upon the Gopher team.

Will the Gopher's finally win a challenge?

Will they be able to build some trust in one another?

And will Kenny ever get through an episode alive?

Find out now, on Total Drama Island!

* * *

 _(Cue theme song)_

* * *

"Today's breakfast," Chef said proudly as he scooped some green slop onto a plate, "Is Hawaiian, Italian fusion casserole."

Gwen looked incredulously at her plate. "You mean leftovers from the last challenge," she corrected.

"Yeah that's right," Chef said angrily, "You got a problem with that!"

"Sir no sir," Gwen said as though she was in the army. The two saluted one another, and Gwen walked back to her table. Next to her, Heather was sneezing up a storm, still badly affected from her trip in the freezer. Gwen laughed while asking, "Need a little Motrin."

"You think you are so funny," Heather said angrily, "But I swear that I will make you miserable for locking me in the freezer." She sneezed loudly again, and exclaimed, "I hate this place.

On the other side of the Dining hall, D.J. was cutting up some of his food for Bunny. Geoff was getting really weirded out when he began to make train noises when he brought the spoon up to the rabbit. Jude walked up to the muscular teen and said, "I don't think that is sanitary bro." D.J. just glared at Jude.

"I think it is sweet," Jen said, "You could learn to appreciate cute things more, Jude."

When Geoff looked to the other side of the table, he sighed sadly. Duncan was giving Harold a noogie. Apparently their prank had had an opposite from desired affect. Duncan was now being more of a bully than ever.

* * *

"Hello there viewers," Chris said with a peaceful nature scene in the background, "Sometimes teams just don't get along. So I thought that the best way to help them get through these disagreements was to exploit it for laughs." Chris rubbed his hands together in anticipation, "This is going to be awesome." Izzy, sticks her head out of a bush in the background, and flips Chris off.

* * *

 **Izzy:** My plan to destroy Chris will begin soon. Very, Very soon.

 **Andrew:** I almost feel bad for Chris. Almost.

* * *

"So last challenge exposed some issues in the teams," when Chris said this, Duncan threatened the Bass with a fist, D.J. glared at Jude, and Heather glared at Gwen, Izzy and Leshawna. "So this week's challenge is going to be based on trust, because all good things are built by trust."

* * *

 **Gwen:** I trusted Trent once. He left me buried alive on the beach. I am just glad I did get dug up by Geoff. He has always been really nice to me. (Blushes)

* * *

"There will be three major challenges for you to complete," Chris said with his sadistic smile, "They will need to be completed by two or more members of your team. Normally, we like to let the competitors chose their partners, but not this time, more fun for me!"

* * *

 **Andrew:** Just remember Chris, if anything gets too out of hand, it is coming out of your paycheck.

 **Chris:** I know! I know! Sheesh, buzz kill.

* * *

"Okay," Chris said as he and the campers stood near a cliff, "So for the first challenge, we will have an extreme rock climbing race. For the Bass, let's have D.J. and Ezekiel, and for the Gophers, how about Heather and Izzy." Chris then threw the campers their climbing rope and harness. Heather grabbed the harness, and began to place it around Izzy.

* * *

 **Heather:** There was no way I was going to let psycho horse beast hold me up.

* * *

"You won't exactly be holding them up," Chris said, "The belay will catch the rope if they fall and save them. To make things more interesting, we added a few traps onto the side of the mountain. Like rusty nails, oil slicks, mild explosives, and a few other surprises."

"Wicked," Harold said, causing all the campers to glare at him.

"The person on belay must also harness their partner up," Chris said, "It is all about trust people."

As Heather began to rope up Izzy, Ezekiel was calming D.J. "I'll handle this, eh," Ezekiel said confidently, "I know you're scared of heights, so just tie me up and I'll handle it." D.J. smiled, before he realized something.

"Bunny," D.J. cooed, "I am sorry, but I would hate for an accident to happen. Can any one hold Bunny?"

"I'll take care of him," Bridgette said as she ran up to D.J. They both smiled at each other, as D.J. handed Bunny to her.

* * *

 **Bridgette:** Maybe this is my chance to get D.J. to like me. If I take care of Bunny well, maybe he will like me more than that cute little rodent.

* * *

"What is the second rope for?" Izzy asked cautiously.

"It is a back up line," Heather responded with a large smile on her face. Izzy just smiled her crazy smile and prepared to begin climbing.

As the two started to climb, it was clear that Izzy was far better at it than Ezekiel. She was completely oblivious to the traps, and did not mind the rusty nails. Chris noticed her fast pace, and decided to begin blowing stuff up. One suddenly happened under Izzy, and blew her off the side of the cliff. Heather managed to stop her from falling, but Chris smiled as he pulled out a super soaker, and sprayed her with hot sauce. This caused her to let go of the rope, which allowed Izzy to fall to the ground.

"Muy Caliente," Chris said in a fake Spanish accent. He then turned to spray D.J., but was shocked when D.J. turned around and revealed that he was wearing sunglasses.

"Is that all you got?" the large African American asked. Chris then turned to the camera.

"Is that all we got?" he asked, secretly hoping they would come up with something else.

Izzy had since been able to regain her lead over Ezekiel. She had no fear of losing this match; she was not facing Jack, only a mildly cute prairie boy. As she got past Ezekiel, she heard Heather shout out, "Come on Izzy, you don't want to fall," Heather then pulled on the second rope, causing Izzy's dress to fall off, revealing her underwear, "Behind."

"Wow," Duncan said in shock, "You don't see that everyday."

"No you do not," Chris said approvingly, "just imagine what it will do to the ratings."

Ezekiel, who the pieces of Izzy's dress had blinded, removed the torn clothing, and saw Izzy's underwear. This, being a home-schooled kid who had never even taken a Sex-Ed class, caused him to lose his balance, and fall. Unfortunately, the rope caught D.J.'s foot, and pulled him up. Eventually, the two collided, and were stuck in the middle of the cliff.

"This bites," D.J. said.

"What bit you?" Ezekiel asked, he still wasn't too good on slang. He suddenly noticed something, "Why does my face feel hot." D.J. decided it would be better to let someone else explain that to him.

Izzy easily made it to the top and did a victory dance, completely ignoring the fact that she was in her panties.

* * *

 **Andrew:** (Very Irate) Wait to go Heather! Now we will have even more censors on out butts. I really am going to have to give Izzy a plan to get back at you.

 **Chris:** Man, Izzy is going to have a lot of fans, won't she?

* * *

Spotlights turned on in rapid succession in the main lodge. On one side, was Lindsey and Jonesy. On the other, was Bridgette and Courage. Suddenly, a young man with side burns, and white shirt, and an orange skull cap jumped up into the air and did a somersault. When he landed behind a podium, Chris suddenly rose up from behind it. The stuntman crawled away as Chris prepared to start the next challenge.

* * *

 **Andrew:** Phil was a stay-on from the old regime. He works really hard, and he does put up with a lot from Chris. Maybe I should use some of the extra money from Chris's salary to give him a raise.

 **Phil:** I am really thankful that Mr. Jefferson took over. Now I am less likely to die from Chris's shenanigans. Plus he treats me like a human being. (Suddenly looks around out house) Am I allowed in here?

* * *

"Round two is a cooking challenge," Chris said, "each team must chose who cooks, and who eats."

* * *

 **Bridgette:** I was chosen to cook. Why? Two word, opposable thumbs.

* * *

"Oh Joseph," Lindsey said excitedly, "Let me cook."

* * *

 **Jonesy:** Okay, she may be no Stephen Hawking. But it's cooking, how bad could she screw up.

* * *

"Today," Chris said with his smirk widening, "you will be preparing Fugu sashimi. The traditional Japanese blow fish." Both Courage and Jonesy's eyes widened. A small projector came up on the wall, showing a blowfish, with a skull and crossbones in the middle. "The Fugu blowfish contains enough toxins to kill thirty people. They must be cut very carefully to avoid the poisonous organs. The poison paralyzes the nerves, and there is only one cure that must be administered in less than an hour, or, you die painfully. So no worries."

When the Fish were placed on the cutting board, Jonesy grabbed Lindsey by the shoulders. "Please tell me you have taken biology," he begged. When Lindsey nodded, he let out a sigh of relief. Lindsey would then poke the blown up fish, causing it to fly around the room like a balloon that was deflating. It then smashed into the window, causing the glass to shatter.

* * *

When Bridgette was done, her sashimi looked like real sushi, with herbs and spices. Lindsey's blowfish looked like it had gone through a blender. Lindsey tried to make it more acceptable by making a ketchup smiley face on the sludge. Courage grabbed one of the pieces of Bridgette's sushi, and tossed it into his mouth. After several seconds, he suddenly jumped up in joy. He and Bridgette then high fived, before she picked him up and hugged him.

* * *

 **Bridgette:** Courage has really proven that he deserves his name. I don't think anyone would expect a little pink dog to have made it this far into the competition. Let alone be excelling in it.

* * *

It was now Jonesy's turn to eat the sashimi. When he ate a bite, he thought about it for a second, and then gave Lindsey a thumbs up. Unfortunately, he then heard a rumbling in his stomach, and then fell on the ground, screaming. He somehow managed to pull himself up onto the table. When he did, his normally tanned skin was completely blue. "I thought you said you passed biology," he said, as he turned to Lindsey. His voice was gurgling and sickly.

"I said that I had taken Biology," Lindsey corrected. Jonesy, fell back to the ground, and ooze started to pour out from his mouth. Courage and Bridgette covered Bunny's eyes as the horrific scene took place.

"It's cool," Chris said calmly, "Just give him twenty-four hours and he will be up and walking good as new."

"Um," Phil said as he walked back into the lodge, "Is somebody going to help this guy?" The intern's question was answered by Chef walking up to Jonesy, and giving the poor jock CPR. I truly pity him.

* * *

"Come on Courage," Bridgette shouted, "Let's go swimming." Courage and the blond girl began running towards the edge of the dock. Bridgette stopped for a second. "Whoops," she said, suddenly grabbing Bunny up from the ground, "Got to put Bunny in a safe spot." She looked around for a second, before finally putting the little rodent on top of the life guard's chair. She and Courage then dived into the water.

* * *

 **Courage:** Bridgette and D.J. really like each other. I'm going to have to help them get together no matter what.

* * *

Jonesy was not enjoying himself after the challenge. The part he liked least was that at the current moment, Chef, in a skimpy nurses outfit, was about to stick him in the butt with a rather large needle. He probably shouldn't have trusted Lindsey.

"Don't worry kid, this won't hurt a bit," Chef said with a sadistic smile, "It will hurt a whole lot!"

* * *

Bridgette smiled as she got out of the lake. Courage was drying himself off by shaking his body. She then gasped. A large snake was slithering up behind Bunny. As Bridgette ran over to try to stop it, the Bunny swallowed the little defenseless rabbit, and slithered off. Just as Bridgette was about to jump on the snake, and Eagle came out of the sky, and grabbed the reptile in its claws. It luckily had landed on the side of the dock. Just as Bridgette was about to jump on the bird of prey, a shark jumped out of the water, and dragged the eagle, snake, and Bunny, down to the depths of the lake.

"Come on!" Bridgette shouted in frustration.

* * *

"The third round involves three more challenges," Chris said as the campers groaned in anger, "It is the three blind challenges. It begins with the blind William Tell, followed by the blind trapeze, ending with the blind toboggan."

"So where is Bunny?" D.J. asked Bridgette, who cringed.

"Um, Bunny, "Bridgette said nervously, "I'll go get him."

As Bridgette walked off, D.J. suddenly had an arrow placed on his head. Chris smiled as he stepped back. "Like legendary marksman William Tell," Chris said as he picked up and apple, "You will be knocking arrows off people's heads with crabapples."

"Isn't it the other way around," Geoff asked.

"Shush," Chris said, "The person, who knocks off the arrow while causing the least amount of damage, while wearing a blindfold, wins." Chris then fired an apple with his slingshot. Unfortunately, he hit D.J. in the crotch. "Aw, nuts," Chris said when he took off the blindfold. He then turned back to the Campers, "Leshawna and Bart will be one team, and Jen and Wyatt will be the other."

"Let me shoot," Wyatt said, "I am a good shot."

"You better be," Jen said unhappily as Wyatt put on his blind fold.

When Chris started the challenge, both Bart and Wyatt let loose their first shot. Both missed their target, but Leshawna, who was much sturdier than Jen, took the apple like it was nothing. Jen was not so lucky, when the apple hit her, she bent over. As the two shooters fired more rounds of fruit, the same things happened. Leshawna took the hits easily, while Jen cringed in pain. After several tries, Bart finally hit the arrow off Leshawna's head. Wyatt, did not see this, and continued to shoot apples. The first hit Jen in the stomach, causing the girl to bend down. This allowed Wyatt's apples to sail past Jen, and hit several other things. Among which was the bear, a loon, and Sasquatch. Chris suddenly ran up to Wyatt.

"Dude it is over," Chris said, "Let it go!"

"Oops," was all Wyatt could say when he took off his blindfold.

"You're going down," Jen said, before he fainted. The others cringed at Jen and glared at Wyatt.

* * *

"And now," Chris said as he announced the next challenge, "prepare for the blind trapeze." They were standing next to a large pool, which was covered by a large wooden structure with two platforms. The campers gasped when they saw that the pond was filled with jellyfish. "Kenny and Double D will be forced to attempt a jump, and hopefully Lindsey and Harold will catch. If they don't we got a medical tent that is ready to remove any jellyfish that come into contact with you. But it will be a very painful swim back to shore."

* * *

Harold was swinging back and forth on the trapeze, while Double D stood on the platform of the giant wooden structure with his eyes blindfolded. While this was going on, D.J. turned to Bridgette.

"So where is Bunny," he asked. Bridgette fidgeted nervously.

"Um," she said, "he hopped away." When she saw tears form in the big guy's eyes, she added, "Sorry D.J."

"No it is alright," he said, before turning away, and shouting to the sky, "Bunny, why did you run away?" Bridgette sighed as she saw the horrible way that D.J was feeling. She did not want to hurt him like that.

* * *

 **Bridgette:** I can't believe that I lied to D.J. about Bunny. I just felt so guilty about what happened to him, and I really like D.J. I wouldn't want him to think that I am really irresponsible. (Suddenly begins to bang her head on the wall) Stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid…

* * *

Jude saw how sad D.J. looked, and walked away into the woods for a second. No one noticed him leaving, because they were too focused on Double D's jump.

"Jump now!" Harold exclaimed, only for Double D to hold on to the rig. Harold sighed and said, "If were going to win, you have got to trust me."

"My apologies," Double D said, before letting go of the rig, and jumping to Harold. Harold managed to catch him, keeping the poor blinded Ed-boy from falling to a stingy fate.

Kenny was also standing on his platform. When Lindsey got close, she shouted, "Jump!" After several seconds however, she had already begun to swing backwards, causing the distance for the jump to grow. "No not yet!" she shouted, but it was too late, Kenny had jumped, and landed in the pool of jellyfish. The campers all looked horrified as Kenny was electrocuted.

"Oh my God!" Stan screamed, "She killed Kenny!"

"You Bastard!" Kyle shouted.

As Kenny flailed in the water, a jellyfish flew out of the pool and landed on Heather, who screamed as well. Gwen smiled as she saw Heather twitch and moan.

* * *

 **Gwen:** Sometimes God just gives you a freebie. (Gives sky a thumbs up)

* * *

"I can't believe that that little parka wearing brat can't keep himself from throwing jellyfish around," Heather growled as she entered the medical tent for the camp. Chef was already sitting there, with Jen and Jonesy already lying down, recovering from their painful challenges. Jen suddenly sat up, though her hair was still frazzled.

"Where am I?" she asked Heather.

"You're in the infirmary," Heather answered, before turning to Chef, "Got anything for removing Jellyfish?" When Chef nodded, Heather laid down on the cot that had been set up.

When Heather was being treated, Jen looked out side the tent, and saw Jude walking by the exit. She suddenly noticed that he was holding a carrot in his hand, and leading a small rabbit, nearly identical to Bunny, back to the challenge area. "That's weird," Jen said, "What is Jude doing with a rabbit?"

"And now," Chris said as he showed the campers some sleds, "the blind toboggan race."

"Say what!" Leshawna asked in a horrified tone.

"Each team will have a driver and a navigator," Chris said as he ignored Leshawna's statement, "the driver steers, while the navigator gives out directions. Oh yeah, and the driver is blindfolded." All the campers gasped at this. Chris smirked as he looked at the remaining campers. "How about D.J. and Leshawna drive, and Geoff and Gwen navigate." Geoff noticed that D.J. was looking extremely depressed at the current moment.

* * *

 **Geoff:** D.J. is my best friend on the island. I am really sorry to see him this upset. I just hope nothing too bad is in this challenge.

 **Bridgette:** (Still banging head on wall) Stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid…

* * *

"D.J., dude," Geoff said as he looked down the mountain they were supposed to sled, "I know you are upset about Bunny, but we got to focus here. This could be life or seriously heinous injury bro."

"Bunny deserted me," D.J. said sadly, "Why should I trust you?"

"Because I don't want to get hurt either," Geoff said as he rubbed the back of his head. Geoff then turned to see Chef putting grease onto the toboggans.

"Just lubing them up a little," Chef explained, "Want to get a little more speed going." Geoff just stared in horror.

* * *

"On your marks," Chris said as the two sets of toboggans sat on the crest of the hill, "Get set, And Go!"

Both teams began to accelerate as the headed down hill. While Leshawna listened to the directions that Gwen gave her, Geoff's warnings about trees and rocks were barely heard by D.J. Suddenly, the Gopher sled hit a rock, causing it to fly into the air. As Gwen screamed, she and Nikki eventually landed in a river. It was then that Gwen noticed something odd.

"Oh no," Gwen moaned as she saw that they were approaching a water fall, "I am not ready to die yet!" As the girls fell over the water fall, they bounced on a log and were sent flying into the air again.

* * *

"D.J.," Geoff shouted, "I really need you to steer dude. Bunny would want you to live." Currently, the Bass sledders had barely missed many trees. Just as all hope seemed lost, the heard a voiced called out to them.

"D.J.," Jude shouted with his hands closed around something, "look who I found!" Jude suddenly opened his hand, to reveal a rabbit that looked exactly like bunny. Geoff smiled happily.

"D.J. look," Geoff said loudly, "It's Bunny."

"Don't tease me man," D.J. said, as he took of his blindfold. He then saw Bunny. "Bunny, you came back," He shouted, before putting the blindfold back into place, "Lets do this."

D.J. suddenly became far more focused. He would actually listen to the directions that Geoff would give to him. Just as it appeared that they had it won, Gwen and Leshawna landed next to them. They were also going at high speed. As the two sleds continued down hill, a small explosion happened to the right of the Bass toboggan. "What the heck was that?" D.J. screamed.

Chris smiled as he pressed down on the detonator again, causing another large explosion. "We had a few explosives left over," Chris explained, and smirked as he said, "I just hate to waste."

As the two teams desperately tried to dodge the explosions, one explosion occurred underneath the toboggan holding Geoff and D.J. As they flew into the air, Gwen and Leshawna turned a corner, allowing them to see the finish line. The Gophers cheered as they finally were about to win. Just as their toboggan was about to cross the finish line, D.J. and Geoff landed on the finish ribbon, signifying that the Bass had won the race. The Bass side exploded in cheers, while the Gophers slumped in defeat.

Jude smiled as he handed D.J. Bunny. As D.J. and Bridgette celebrated, for getting his pet back and not getting caught respectively, Jen walked up to Jude. "I can't believe you found a new bunny for D.J.," she said, "I thought you hated the bunny."

"I like rabbits," Jude responded, "I just didn't think it was clean to eat at the same table as one." As Jude walked back to the rest of the Bass, Jen smiled at him. She had defiantly underestimated her friend.

"Okay," Chris said, as he walked up to the campers, "The Bass won the race." The Bass again let out a cheer. "Unfortunately," The Bass stopped cheering, "I said that these were blind challenges. Since D.J. took off his blindfold, the Gophers win on a technicality." The Gophers let out a shout in victory. Andrew smiled as he held up this challenge's MVC medal.

"I think we can all agree that Leshawna did the most for her team," Andrew said as the ghetto girl shouted in happiness, "She did technically win two challenges, and she has done well so far."

* * *

 **Leshawna:** I would like to thank all my fans out there for supporting me. You all made this award worth the risks I took in these past few days.

 **Tyler:** Is it just me, or does D.J. seem to get disqualified a lot.

 **Jen:** Sorry, you are my friend, but nobody hits me in the head with apples and gets away with it.

* * *

"Who wants a tasty treat," Chris said as he motioned a plate of marshmallows, "a sweet food that represents exemption, security, and-"

"Oh my God, will you just get on with it," Morty exclaimed.

Chris suddenly appeared over Geoff's shoulder. "If you don't get a marshmallow, you can never come back," he said quickly. He then returned to the podium, and grabbed his first marshmallow.

"Lets see, marshmallows go to Duncan, Ezekiel, Double D, D.J., Geoff, Bridgette, Ed, Eddy, Dib, Peter, Homer, Bender, Rick, Morty, Harold, Jen, Jude, Courage, Tyler, Kim, Ron, Jack, Stan, Kyle, Grim all receive marshmallows tonight, so none of you are going home. So now it is down to the two who have received the most votes to be kicked off.

Wyatt began to tremble under the pressure, while Katie's teeth chattered. It had been so long since they had last lost a challenge, they had forgotten how nerve-raking the marshmallow ceremonies could be.

"And the final marshmallow goes to…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

… (Please just get on with it-Grim)

…

…

…

…Katie."

Wyatt sighed as Katie let out a cry of joy in grabbing her marshmallow. He slowly picked up his guitar, and walked back to the dock, and got on the boat and left. Jude stayed on the dock to wave goodbye to his friend, and was joined by Jen, Jonesy, Caitlin, and Nikki. One of their group of six was gone, who knows how long the rest of them would last.

* * *

 **Losers:** _Courtney, Zim, Noah, Eva, Sadie, Justin, Billy, Rusty, Trent, Cody, Beth, Wyatt_

 _ **AN: That's another chapter down, see you at the next one!**_


	14. Chapter 14

Chris: Last time on Total Drama Island. The campers were challenged to learn to trust one another. Izzy mooned Ezekiel, Lindsey poisoned Jonesy, and Wyatt pummeled Jen with apples. Jude would then shock Jen by replacing D.J.'s original Bunny, which had been eaten by a snake, with another identical rabbit.

In the end, the Bass's winning streak would end, and Wyatt would pay for his inaccuracy in the William Tell challenge, by being voted off. He would then bare a tearful farewell to his friends from home, as he went off to stay with the other losers.

Will the Bass be able to regain their winning spark?

Will Kenny ever live through an episode?

And will Izzy ever stop being awesome?

Find out now, On Total Drama Island.

* * *

 _(Cue Theme Song)_

* * *

"I can't believe how hot it is here," Leela said as she sat on the dock. She; and every other camper were sweating profusely. It had to be ninety degrees in the shade. "I thought Canada was known for cool weather."

All the campers were trying to beat the heat as best as possible. Bridgette and several others were handing out in the lake, Izzy was fanning herself with a branch she ripped off a tree, and Ed was pouring some of Chef's cold Oatmeal on his body. They suddenly heard a car horn. They turned to see Chris smirking as he got off his ATV, carrying a glass of ice tea, and an ice cream cone.

"Hello campers," the host said, "I hope you all are enjoying this wonderful day as much as I am." All the campers glared at him. How dare he show off his modern conveniences. "Anyway," the host said after taking another sip, "Today's challenge will involve doing what many people do to beat the heat, aqua activities!"

When many of the campers gave the host confused looks, he elaborated. "Your challenge will be a series of summer time activities that take place in the ocean, at a lake, or in the pool. Team that wins the best of five of these challenges wins invincibility, plus an air-conditioner, for their bedroom. Losers send someone home. Sound good." Many of the campers could not help but be glad. They were finally going to get out of the heat.

* * *

After all the campers had switched into their bathing suits, they were out on the beach of the lake, all waiting for the first event to be announced. When Chris walked up, all of the campers screamed and covered their eyes. The self-proclaimed handsome host was in a Speedo, and it was too horrific a sight for them to stand. Chris, oblivious to the torture the campers were undergoing, began to explain the next challenge.

"The first of the five showdowns that will take place," Chris said as he walked down to the shore, "Is an underwater scavenger hunt. Each team has a five treasures hidden somewhere off shore. Your task it to find all of these items, and returns them to your section of the beach. First team to return all five items gets the first point." Suddenly, Chris took out two pieces of paper, and handed them to the Bass and Gopher teams.

"You will be searching for a gold necklace, a ship in a bottle, a flag, a cannonball, and, the greatest treasure out there, a golden statue of yours truly." The campers all groaned at the last one, Chris was too narcissistic for his own good. Chris then held up a gun, but before he could shoot it, Andrew grabbed it from him.

"Don't you remember what happened last time?" the producer asked angrily. Chris cringed when he remembered how PETA had called out a hit on him after he killed that innocent eagle. Andrew then picked up a whistle and blew on it, starting the race.

The Bass and Gophers raced into the water, searching for the treasures. After several seconds, many of the divers suddenly resurfaced, desperately trying to regain their breath.

Bridgette, who was one of the few with very large lungs, dived and searched the lake bottom for a moment. As she squinted, she suddenly spotted a bright yellow glare on the bottom. As she returned to the surface for air, she took a deep breath, and shouted, "I saw one of the treasures!"

She would dive again, and soon, she and Jack, managed to get closer to the treasure. It was the Chris statue, and its head was sticking out of the ground. The two Bass then stuck their hands in the dirt, and lifted the statue out of the ground, and toward the surface. The tow then swam over to the shore, only to be shocked to see Izzy carrying the Flag and bottle for the Gophers. The psycho-girl then turned to them and smirked.

Just then, Ezekiel came up to the beach, carrying the Bass's necklace. It had been D.J. who had discovered it, but it was Ezekiel who had actually gotten it. D.J. was still fearful of being too deep in the water. It had been light enough that he had been able to lift it to the beach on his own.

When Ezekiel walked up to the other Bass members, Izzy waved at him. When the prairie boy finally turned to the wild girl, she smiled slyly, and winked at him. Ezekiel blinked confusedly as Izzy cackled. Jack just patted the boy's shoulder, and felt nothing but pity for the farm boy.

* * *

 **Jack:** I thought that evil girl could love nothing other than destruction. I feel truly sorry for Ezekiel.

 **Ezekiel:** Why does Izzy always look at me like that? Do you think she might want to kill me?

 **Izzy:** Oh Zeke, you have yet to learn the wiles of us females. We are pure evil.

* * *

Geoff was not sure of his opinion his current situation. On one hand, he had found the cannonball for his team. On the other hand, he was still unable to lift the metal sphere. Chris had forgotten to mention that each of the cannonballs weighed about eight pounds, and carrying one of those up to the surface was no cake walk. Just as he was about to drop the ball, Jude, who saw the struggling party boy, arrived and helped Geoff swim to the surface. With only a little difficulty, the two transported the ball to the beach, giving the Bass the advantage.

The Gophers were moving much faster. As Izzy was searching for the Golden Chris, both Fry and Leela had found an item. Leela had found the cannonball in some soot, and had single handily taken it back to shore. Her strength continued to surprise her teammates. Several of the competitors were a little envious of her.

Just as the Bass pulled up their cannonball, which was their third item, Izzy brought the Chris statue to shore, which won the first challenge for the Gophers. "Just remember Gophers," Chris warned, "You still have to win four more challenges if you want to win the whole day." The campers trudged back to shore in order to hear the next activity.

* * *

 **Izzy:** Who's bad! Who's bad!

 **Gwen:** I am actually really surprised that Kenny did not die in that challenge.

 **Kenny:** (mumbled so we cannot understand) Me too!

* * *

"The next beach game," Chris said as he stood on the dock, "Is a classic game of chicken." When many of the campers stared at Chris blankly, the host sighed.

"He means," Andrew said as he rubbed his forehead, "Two members of each team will go out into a small roped off area of the lake. One of the campers will stand on his partner's shoulder, and then will fight the opposing team's pair of fighters. First team to knock the other team over wins."

The producer suddenly pulled out a list. "For the Bass, we have Tyler and Katie, and for the Gophers, we have Izzy and Lindsey." Tyler shouted in joy at this new test of his athleticism. The two sets of campers began to wade into the lake.

"Oh," Katie said to Tyler, "Let me be the top, I was always very talented at pillow fight with Sadie." Tyler reluctantly allowed Katie on his shoulders; after all, she was lighter than him. Lindsey scowled when she saw this.

* * *

 **Lindsey:** How dare Kathy get that close with Trevor? I already saw him first.

* * *

"Let me on top," Lindsey shouted at Izzy. Izzy was smart enough to realize that a crazy Lindsey maybe a very dangerous thing, complied. When Chef blew the whistle, Izzy and Lindsey charged at the Bass group.

The Bass were unable to retaliate, because, Tyler was being cursed with his own jinx, and Katie was still talking about how much fun she and Sadie had together. Suddenly, Katie began to cry as she thought about Sadie. Tyler was barely able to dodge the first charge, but with Katie blubbering about how she missed Sadie, he was unable to dodge for a second time. Lindsey slammed Katie when they collided, and Tyler was barely able to hang on.

Izzy smirked as she turned around for another attack. Tyler was unable to turn around to meet the assault, and was knocked over by the pure force of Izzy and Lindsey's attack. The Gophers cheered as Izzy and Lindsey walked back onto shore. They had just won the second game, and they only needed one more victory to clinch a complete victory.

The Bass glared at Katie, who was too upset about missing Sadie to care about what happened in the match. Many of the campers patted Tyler on the back. He had done his best, but he could not make up for the incompetence of his teammate.

* * *

 **Jen:** I cannot believe that we lost the challenge because that girl could not get over her friend not being in the game. We all have a chance of losing, get over it.

 **Peter:** Wow that was even more pathetic than that time I tried to cover up my farts my coughing.

* * *

 _(Cue Cutaway)_

 _Alright," a teacher said as Peter was sitting in a meeting, "Welcome to this months PTA meeting. I know there have been a lot of worries about the school serving healthy lunches."_

 _Peter coughed, covering a small farting sound._

" _I also know that many of you are worried about teachers' salaries-."_

 _Peter coughed again._

" _And about the options in art class-"_

 _Peter coughed again._

" _Is there something you want to say, Mr. Griffin?"_

" _Um," Peter said, before letting out a low, "Nooooooooooo," which covered a small farting sound. "No," he said again covering another farting sound._

 _Just as the teacher turned back to the board, Peter coughed again._

 _(End Cutaway)_

* * *

"Okay," Chris said as he held up his megaphone, "We will have a short lunch break before the next challenge, so rest up and Bass, try to make the next one interesting."

As the campers walked to the cafeteria, they noticed that instead of Chef cooking their food in the kitchen, Andrew was cooking on a grill. The campers all smiled, relieved that they were not going to have to deal with Chef's disgusting food. The campers all got in line in front of the grill, and Andrew then began to hand out hamburgers.

While he was working, however, the American producer was unaware of Chef, who realized this was his chance. Silently, Chef snuck near the back of the line, where D.J. was politely letting everyone skip him. Chef scowled at the boy's mental weakness when D.J. nearly collapsed when Bridgette passed by him. When everyone had skipped D.J., Chef grabbed the linebacker by the collar, and dragged him behind the kitchen. Bridgette turned around to thank D.J., but he was nowhere to be seen. "Anybody seen D.J.?" she asked.

* * *

D.J. was trembling under Chef's harsh stare. Why had the large man dragged him here? "Listen D.J.," Chef said, "You are a pathetic spineless wimp!"

"Okay," D.J. conceded sadly, "I guess you are entitled to your opinion."

"No you idiot!" Chef shouted angrily," When someone calls you a wimp, you are supposed to try and prove your toughness by beating them up! Agreeing with them only makes you more of a wimp!" The old soldier then grabbed the young African American by the collar. "We have got to toughen you up!"

* * *

 **Chef:** I have to admit, I see a bit of myself in D.J. But I was forced to develop my tough guy persona with out someone like myself helping. This is gonna be fun.

* * *

"Here is the deal," Chef said while pacing back and forth in front of D.J., "I'll help you toughen up, and in return, you will split the prize money with me. It is an offer you can't refuse," Chef said, before he grabbed D.J. by the shirt, "I won't let you."

Chef then threw D.J. back into line. Bridgette smiled when she saw him return. "Hey," she asked, "Where were you?"

D.J. suddenly saw Chef glare at him as the cook gave Andrew some more burger patties. "I was feeding Bunny," D.J. lied. When Bridgette smiled and turned around, D.J. began to look on the ground in shame.

* * *

 **D.J.:** My momma always told me to play fair, and this new alliance makes me feel so wrong. Plus I lied to Bridgette. She would never like a guy who lied to her. I am sure she has never lied in her entire life.

 **Bridgette:** I still feel really bad about what happened to the original Bunny, and I know that D.J. is the type of guy who would never lie. I just wonder if he would ever be able to forgive me for lying to him like that.

* * *

"I hope everyone ate to their hearts content," Chris said happily, as the campers filed back on to the dock, "Because we are about to begin our third challenge." As the campers walked out onto the dock, they noticed a large burly man, with a tye-dye shirt standing on the dock. Most of the American campers suddenly smiled. "I see some of you recognized Rupert Boneham." The man, Rupert waved and laughed. "He is among the most famous reality show contestants ever, even though he never actually won. He competed on two seasons of _Survivor_ , and would win the most popular survivor award when America voted. Andrew managed to get him here, in order to explain the next game. Rupert, if you would?"

"Your challenge is based on among the most legendary people to ever roam the seas," Rupert said enthusiastically, "Pirates!" Many of the campers shouted happily. "Your challenge will involve both teams possessing a boat. The boats will hold five of your teammates. First team to capture and or sink the other teams boat, wins." As the campers began to decide who to send off on their boats, several of the campers went to the confession cam.

* * *

 **Heather:** I never understood why people liked Rupert. All he did was be nice to people. Jonny Fair-play was better at playing the game; I mean that fake dead Grandmother Speech was genius.

 **D.J.:** When I saw that I had made it on to this show, I wanted to play the game the way Rupert had. Be kind to others, and always be straight with people. Now though, with that alliance with Chef, I don't think I can live up to his example.

 **Ed:** I like chickens.

 **(From outside) Leshawna:** Hey crazy no-chin-boy, get out of there and give someone else a turn.

 **Ed:** I love butter toast!

* * *

"On your marks," Rupert said as each team began to sail their small dingy, "Get set, go!" On the Bass boat, were Captain Jack, Peter, Rick, Duncan, Ezekiel and D.J. One the Gopher boat was Captain Izzy, Heather, Kenny, Bart, Owen, and Brian. Both boats did posses one mast, so they were actually fairly good sailing vessels. As the two boats went out into the lake, Captain Izzy quickly grabbed a cutlass that had been provided, and used a rope to swing onto the Bass boat.

Jack, using his own katana, began to sword fight against the red haired girl. While they fought, the Bass brought up their cannon, and fired. Kenny, who was looking at the Bass boat while standing on the side of the Gopher boat, was decapitated by the cannonball.

"Oh my god!" Stan screamed from the shore, "They killed Kenny!"

"Those Bastards!" Kyle shouted.

* * *

 **Brian:** What the hell was Chris thinking, giving us real live ammunition?!

* * *

The Bass decided it might be a smart idea to stop firing the cannon. It would probably be a bad idea to hit someone else.

Izzy and Jack were now dueling near the cannon, and when Izzy saw the large piece of weaponry, she smirked. With a flick of her wrist, she turned the cannon around, where it was facing the mast, grabbed a rope, and put a fuse in the cannon. When Jack saw what she was doing, he said, "You're mad!"

Izzy turned to him and smirked. "Thank goodness for that, otherwise, this would never work." She then lit the fuse, gave an air kiss to Ezekiel, which caused the cannon to fire. This would cause the mast to be shot off, and Izzy to be flung into the air. After soaring through the air, the girl disappeared. The Bass crew all stared in shock.

"I wonder," Ezekiel said, as he saw Izzy flying back to her boat, "If she has it all planned out, or just makes it up as she goes along, eh." The crew stared at the farm boy, who seemed unaware of the movie joke he had just made.

* * *

 **Ezekiel:** So I haven't seen Pirates of the Caribbean, it is not like I enjoyed seeing us lose our mast. Man that Izzy is one weird girl. Why does she keep doing weird stuff to me?

* * *

Izzy smirked as she landed on the deck. When all the Gophers applauded her, she smirked, and said, "And that was with out a drop of rum. Now let's go get their boat, they're sitting ducks!" The Gophers all smiled as they began to steer the boat, but were shocked when they heard a strange creaking noise. Suddenly, the dingy sank into the water at a rapid pace. Their ship was unusable.

The Bass on both the shore and boat shouted out victory cries. They had upset the Gophers. Chris suddenly noticed Chef sitting on the shore, in a wet suit. He really didn't care enough to notice what Chef was holding. Chef smirked as he hid the brace and bit drill he had. He was defiantly fulfilling his part of the alliance. Now all he had to do was wait for D.J. to win the show.

* * *

 **Rupert:** It was great to be on this show. Now I have to get back to Indiana where I help out troubled kids.

* * *

"Now that Rupert has had his part and gone home," Chris said happily, "We can all get more dialogue from the most important person here, me!" The campers groaned.

"Your next challenge," Chris said happily, "Is a classic water activity, a super soaker fight. Both teams will be given super soakers, and then will be put into two different areas of the camp. Team to have the most members stay dry longest, wins." The campers all began to head to their respective parts of camp.

"Okay guys," Geoff said excitedly, "We got lucky last time, but now we have got to win these next two challenges. So let's go kick some butt!" As he led a charge to the other side of camp, he noticed that no one was following him. When he looked around, he suddenly realized that he was surrounded by Brian, Stewie, and all of the Gophers. The Gophers all smirked as the let out a torrent of water, completely drenching the cowboy. The Bass were sitting behind the kitchen, waiting to attack.

* * *

 **Bridgette:** We decided that we would send Geoff out in order to distract them, and then attack. I feel kind of bad about using Geoff as a decoy, but what the heck, it was all worth it when we attacked.

* * *

The Bass all jumped out from behind the building, and let loose a cannonade of water on the Gophers. Owen was the only one who was able to get away, while the rest of the Gophers were soaked. The Bass cheered as he Gophers and Geoff went to the dock to wait for the challenge to be completed. The Bass then began to wonder how they were going to eliminate Owen. They came up with a brilliant trap, so cunning that no one could even dare to understand its complexity.

And like all good traps, it started with cheese.

* * *

Owen was tentatively walking through the center of the camp, carefully watching out for the Bass. He suddenly smelled a rather appetizing aroma near the flag pole. When he reached the flagpole, he saw a rather large hunk of cheese sitting next to it. "Now that is weird," Owen commentated, "Why would someone leave a hunk of cheese out here."

A light bulb appeared above his head. "I know," he said, "Chef must have known I love cheese, and left some out for me to eat. Well, it would be impolite of me not to comply." When Owen bent down for the cheese, the entire Bass team jumped out from behind their cabin and sprayed Owen with water.

The Bass cheered when Chris announced their victory on the intercom, they had won a second game. Just one more win and they would be immune from tonight's vote.

* * *

 **Chris:** I gotta tell ya, Owen actually fell for one of the most stupid traps I have ever seen; I mean does that guy realize that Chef does not like him.

 **Geoff:** Am I angry about them using me as a decoy? Well we did win the challenge because of it, so I guess I am all right with it. (Silently whispers to himself) they will pay dearly.

* * *

"I hope you guys are ready for the final tiebreaker round," Chris said as he smiled sadistically. The campers groaned, the sun was already going down, and they were very sore after the long day of challenges. Chris smiled as he picked up a white ball. "Your challenge is a game of water volleyball." Several of the campers sighed happily when they realized the challenge would not be too difficult. "Each team will have six members in the game at a time. The first team to reach five points wins."

As the teams picked their members, Chris turned to Chef. "Hey Chef," he asked, "Why did you give the Bass that cheese in the first place?"

"Oh," Chef said with sweat pouring down his brow, "it makes better TV if we have a tiebreaker challenge."

"Good thinking," Chris said happily. Chef wiped the sweat off his forehead; he had really dodged a bullet there.

* * *

The two teams were in the water, in the area that had been set up for a volleyball court. On the Bass side, was Geoff, Katie, Bridgette, D.J., Harold, and Homer. On the Gopher team, was Izzy, Gwen, Leela, Owen, Heather, and Jonesy. Geoff smiled as he was given the first ball, and served it above the net and the heads of most of the Gophers. Just before it reached the water's surface, Leela dived for the ball and hit it up in the air. It was high enough for Owen to get behind it and hit it back onto the Bass side. Harold was able to easily return it, but Izzy had jumped in the way, and spiked the ball on the Bass side, thus giving them the first point.

The Gophers were now given the ball to serve. Owen served it, hitting over to Harold, who karate kicked it back to the Gopher side. Izzy hit it high into the air when she returned the ball, but she hit it too far, and it went out of bounds, giving the ball and point to the Bass.

D.J. served the ball next. The ball was moving very quickly, and was rather high, but it was going to be an easy return. Just as Leela was about to hit the ball, Heather pushed her out of the way in order to receive it. When she returned it however, it hit the net, and fell back into the Gopher's side. Many of the Gophers glared at Heather when Chris gave another point to the Bass.

* * *

 **Heather:** What? I am trying to finally win an MVC award here, and the best way to do it is if I have the best performance in a challenge.

* * *

Bridgette smiled as she served the ball again. Unfortunately for the Gophers, they were too busy glaring at Heather to notice it. They were all shocked when Chris gave the Bass another point.

The next serve was Duncan's. The serve, however, was barely able to get over the net, Gwen then got under the ball; hit it up into the air, just above the net. Izzy then jumped off Owen's shoulders, and spiked the ball into the water. The Gophers cheered as they got the ball back.

When Leela spiked the ball for the Gophers, she hit it so hard that it went in the stratosphere. When it fell back down, it seemed to be burning up in its descent. When it hit the water, steam rose up from where it had landed, though it had still landed in the Bass's court, thus giving another point to the Gophers.

When the Gophers were again allowed to serve, Gwen managed to get the ball across the net. Duncan returned the ball with all of his strength. But the ball was not high enough to soar over the net, and it hit the net and fell back into the water. The Bass suddenly realized that the Gophers now had four points. One more loss and they would lose the challenge.

When the ball was served again, the two teams began to hit it back and forth. None of them were giving an inch. After about five minutes of continuous returning, Izzy smirked as she formed a plan. With one swift strike, she sent the ball over the net, and near Katie. Just as the pink wearing girl was about to hit the ball, Izzy shouted, "Oh," and then asked, "Is that Sadie?"

"Sadie!" Katie said happily, turning around to the shore. Because she did this, the ball hit the water, and the Gophers cheered. They had won the match. Chris smiled when he walked up to the teams.

"Alright," he said, "Looks like the Bass are going to be heading back to the campfire pit tonight. Gophers, I hope you enjoy your new air conditioner." The Gophers cheered as Chef carried the cooling device off of the boat, only to be crushed when Chef dropped the conditioner into the water.

"Well," Andrew said as Chef and Chris laughed, "I guess this award goes to Izzy. She did more or less win the volleyball and diving challenges, plus she totally dominated the pirate challenge. So I would have to say that she has defiantly earned this medal.

* * *

 **Duncan:** You fell for one of the stupidest tricks in the book.

 **Grim:** You cost us the challenge.

 **Morty:** Sorry, but you have to go.

 **Izzy:** _(singing) Yo ho! Yo ho! A pirate's life for me!_

"You have all cast your vote," Chris said as he walked into the campfire pit with a plate of marshmallows, "and let me remind you, that the person who does not receive a marshmallow must immediately walk down the dock of shame, take a ride on the boat of losers, and can never come back, ever!"

"So, first marshmallow goes to, Morty."

Morty caught his marshmallow.

"Geoff, Bridgette, D.J., Double D, Homer, Kyle, Eddy, and Courage."

They all also caught their marshmallows, though Homer caught his in his mouth.

"Jude, Jen, Dib, Peter, Bender, Stan, Ed, and Duncan."

They all also caught their marshmallows.

"Ezekiel, Rick, Kim, Ron, Jack,Tyler, and Grim."

They all also caught their marshmallows.

"Campers," Chris said as he picked up the final marshmallow, "Either Harold or Katie will be leaving tonight. Who is it going to be?" Both Harold and Katie sweated nervously, as they waited for the last name to be called out.

"And the final marshmallow goes to…"

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…Harold."

"Yes," Harold said as he pumped his fist. Katie just stared angrily at her teammates.

"Fine!" she shouted, "I hope you all enjoy staying in the hellhole you bunch of marshmallow eating freaks!"

As she walked angrily over to the boat, she suddenly squealed. Sadie waved to her, and the two wonder twins embraced and let out a great "EEEEEEEEEEEEE!"

* * *

 **Losers:** _Courtney, Zim, Noah, Eva, Sadie, Justin, Billy, Eddy, Trent, Cody, Beth, Wyatt, Katie_

 _ **AN: Done! I hope you all liked the references in this chapter.**_


	15. Chapter 15

Chris: Last time on Total Drama Island. The campers tried to beat the heat, by a day of water filled activities. During the five challenges, Lindsey pushed over Katie, Izzy gave a corny Jack Sparrow impression, and Owen fell for a trap involving cheese. Secretly, Chef also formed an illegal alliance with an unwilling D.J. In the end, it was the Bass who went to the campfire ceremony, where they voted off Katie. She would be happily reunited with her BFF, and all was right with the world.

What have we come up with to torture the campers this time?

Will D.J.'s lies eat his soul up?

And will Kenny ever actually get through an episode alive?

Find out now, on Total Drama Island!

* * *

 _(Cue theme song)_

* * *

"Hello campers!" Chris shouted on his megaphone, "I hope you are all ready for your next challenge, because it is a doosy." The campers all groaned as they walked away from their activities and walked to the center of camp, where Chris was smirking.

"Today's challenge will test your ability to form strategies, outsmart your opponent, and most importantly," Chris smiled as he suddenly picked up a small flag, "The ability to capture a piece of meaningless cloth. Were playing capture the flag kiddies!" The campers all seemed rather unfazed. Chris angrily stared at them. "Shouldn't you guys be, I don't know, frightened or scared?"

"Two things," Bojack said as he held up his hand, "Number one, its capture the flag, how bad could it be. Number two, even if it is really bad, Andrew has mellowed out the challenges before, and he will probably do it again."

"Right, Andrew," Chris said sadistically, causing many of the campers to cringe, "I hate to say it, but Andrew has decided to leave the island for a while."

"What!" The campers shouted, all fearful for their lives.

"That is right;" Chris said happily, "Andrew has some important business back in the states, so he will give his title of producer temporarily to some very handsome host."

"Aw crap!" Gwen shouted angrily. The campers were now without the one person who kept the sadist host in line. The longer Andrew is away, the more horrible life would get.

"So without Andrew here at the moment," Chris said sadistically, "I can make the challenges as life-threatening as possible."

Chris then began to pace in front of the teams. "Today's capture the flag challenge will be a difficult one. Some of you might not survive." Many of the campers gulped. "The teams will be given half the camp to place their flag. Once you have placed the flag, it can not be moved. Each team's objective is to steal the other team's flag. If you are tagged in side your opponents area, you are forced to go to jail. The only way to escape jail is to have one of your teammates come and drag you back to your team's side of camp. We have also taken the liberty of placing a few traps around the camp, just to make life harder on you teens. So, other than that, there are no rules, so get out there, and make some good material for television."

The campers sighed as the camp was split up. This was going to be much less easy without their sympathetic producer.

* * *

 _(Bass)_

"So this is where we will hide our flag," Geoff said as he and the others stood on a small knoll in their half of the camp. It was surrounded by a small group of trees. "Maybe we should assign who should guard the flag, the jail, and who should be on the hunt for their flag."

"Okay then," Jude said, "Then who does what?"

"Well," Geoff said, "I think Homer, Peter, and Bender should stay to guard the flag. They are both pretty easy to spot, and would not be that useful in trying to get the flag." He suddenly saw the two fat guys having a farting contest and Bender drinking an entire bottle of beer. "Maybe Harold should also stay here to make sure they don't do something too stupid."

"What!" Harold shouted, "I have many mad skills that would be really useful out trying to get the flag!"

"I know," Geoff said in an appeasing tone, "But maybe you could use some of your mad skills to-"he saw Harold glare at him angrily while he tried to make up an answer, "Make some traps."

"I guess I could do that," Harold conceded, before adding an angry, "gosh!"

* * *

 **Harold:** I still feel rather unappreciated on my team. At least Geoff gave me a leadership position. I mean, has anyone else spent two years Nature Nate's Survival Camp. I am totally going to make our flag area an impenetrable fortress.

"I guess Dib, Courage, Stan, and Kyle can guard the jail," Geoff said, "And the rest of us will go out to get the flag. Sound good to everybody?"

When the campers nodded, the guards went to their stations, and the attackers headed towards the border into Gopher territory.

* * *

 _(Gophers)_

The Gophers had also agreed to specific roles. Heather had decided that Lindsey and herself would guard the flag, Mandy and Caitlin would guard attempt to capture the Bass's flag. When the other Gophers left, Mandy turned to Heather.

"Why do you want all of us to stay here?" she asked.

"Because," Heather said quietly, "This will be a good time to really discuss our alliances next few moves. I really think we should try to get rid of Izzy as soon as possible."

"Why?" Caitlin asked, "She has won us a lot of challenges, our team needs her."

"If she makes it to the individual round," Heather said warily, "She will dominate the competition. We cannot let that happen. So as soon as she makes a mistake, we kick her butt off the island."

The other members of the alliance, even Mandy looked a little wary at Heather's suggestion. All of them asked themselves, would their team survive without Izzy leading them?

* * *

"Alright Campers!" Chris shouted over the intercom, "Let's go capture some flags!"

With that, both teams began to cross the border of the teams' territories, and went into the unknown abyss of the unknown.

* * *

"There," Harold said happily as he wiped the sweat from his brow. It had taken a long time, but his great set of traps had finally been completed. Peter and Homer did not seem to care. They were too busy drawing in the dirt with sticks. While Bender was still drinking. Harold glared at them.

* * *

 **Harold:** While Duncan is my least favorite teammate, I also have a great disliking for Homer, Peter, and Bender. They are so stupid that I don't think they even realize that they are in a reality show and all Bender does is drink and insult the rest of us all the time. Idiots!

* * *

Izzy was smiling as she hid behind some bushes. She smiled sadistically when she heard some rustling in some brush. With cat-like speed, she jumped out from behind the bush, and ambushed the creature. Unfortunately, the creature turned out to be Bojack.

"What the hell are you doing!" the Horseman screamed. Izzy jumped off of him after realizing who it was.

"Oops," she said apologetically.

"What the hell's going on over here?" they heard Cartman's nasally voice whine. Both he and Kenny suddenly came out from another bush. From another bush, Gwen and Leela came out of the brush. When she saw the great amount of people in the clearing, Izzy grinned as a light bulb came on.

"Hey," Izzy said happily, "I know, let's form an alliance!" Many of her teammates stared at the psycho-girl in shock.

"What," Leela said, "Why?"

"Well Heather has her alliance, so why shouldn't Izzy!" Izzy shouted. Many of the campers suddenly looked shocked.

"Heather has an alliance?" Frylock asked. Many of the campers were shocked by this new info.

"Yeah," Izzy said without a care in the world, "She has had one since the second challenge. So if she can have one, why can't Izzy?"

The other campers were too shocked by this development to even answer her question. When they had finally recovered from the shock, they turned to Izzy.

"Alright," Gwen said, "We'll join."

"Yes!" Izzy shouted, "Let's go Team E-scope!"

"Team E-scope," Bojack said incredulously. Most of them realized that they had better expect the unexpected from now on.

* * *

 **Bojack:** Well, it is a stupid name, but what the hell, it's not like I have any better ideas at the moment.

 **Cartman:** Excellent. Now with an alliance, I can truly begin my plans to win this game (While he is rubbing his hands evilly, the sloppy Joe Monster appears out of nowhere and attacks him from behind, causing the fat boy to yelp in pain)

 **Izzy:** (Cam is covered in Cartman's blood) Why is it that this stall is always covered in blood? What's up with that?!

* * *

Harold smiled as he sat next to the flag. As soon as anyone attempted to take the piece of cloth, he, Peter, Bender, and Homer would jump out and ambush them. Just then, there was a rustle in the trees near where he had set one of his traps. Harold smiled happily when Owen was flung off the ground and into the air. Peter ran over and let Owen go, but he had already tagged the large teenager, and sent Owen to jail.

"This is too easy," Harold said as he laid down to look at some clouds. Really, this show wasn't too troublesome.

* * *

Geoff smiled as he looked out from behind a tree. He was only a few yards away from the Gopher's flag, and Heather and the rest of the guards were too busy talking to notice him. Just as he was about to make a rush at the flag, he heard a rustling in the brush on the other side of the clearing where the flag was located. He was slightly surprised to see Cartman come out from the bushes.

"Hey you bitches," Cartman greeted the other guards, "how is it going?"

"Get lost weirdo," Heather snapped, rather annoyed at the nasally tone of the boy.

"I just thought that you might like to know that Izzy has formed an alliance," Cartman said nonchalantly. When he said this, Heather and her entire alliance looked shocked. "Yeah," Cartman continued, "She apparently knew about your alliance since it formed, and formed her own."

"Thank you for that information," Heather said swiftly. She then turned to try to make a new plan with her alliance, when she heard a cough. "What do you want," she said as she turned to Cartman.

"Simple," Cartman said evilly, "I want in your alliance."

"Why should we let you in?" Heather asked angrily.

"Well if giving you information isn't enough," Cartman said, "I could always just tell the others that you know they are in an alliance, and then they would try to vote you out as soon as they got the chance."

Heather suddenly blanked. She had been outsmarted by some nine year old boy. She had to admit, she was impressed. "Fine," Heather said graciously, "Welcome to my alliance."

* * *

 **Cartman:** Excellent, my plans are coming to fruition. Now I am a member of both alliances, and I will be able to manipulate the votes from now on.

 **Geoff:** Wow, that is some serious strategy going on in the Gopher camp. That Cartman is one bad little dude. And I mean bad-bad, not good-bad. Man, I hope he doesn't try to use that alliance to get rid of Gwen. (Realizes what he has just said) Damn it!

* * *

"Attack!" Izzy shouted as she and the other members of Team E-Scope charged towards the Bass's flag. Izzy, as soon as she stepped onto the ground in the clearing, fell into the trap hole that Harold had dug. Cartman, who had returned from his meeting with Heather, also fell in the hole. Kenny, saw what happened, and jumped over the hole. As he dived over the pit, he landed in a snare. Unfortunately, he landed in the snare head first, and was soon hanging from a tree like an executed convict.

"Oh my god!" Peter shouted.

"You killed Kenny!" Homer shouted as he pointed at Harold.

"I'm a bastard!" Harold concluded.

The other members of team E-Scope decided to back off and form a new strategy. This meant that they left both Izzy and Cartman behind. Both were captured and transported to jail.

* * *

"Let me out of here!" Izzy shouted as she moved a cup back and forth around the jail area, "I have a right to a lawyer! I was framed! I take the fifth!"

"Will you shut the hell up?" Kyle shouted angrily. He, Stan, Dib, and Courage where currently playing a game of Go fish. The poor Jewish boy was tired of listening to the girl scream.

"Shut your goddamn Jew mouth!" Cartman screamed at Kyle.

"Okay," Kyle said as he threw the cards down in frustration, "that is it!" He suddenly picked up a plank that he was sitting on, and stormed into the holding area. While the others continued to play cards, they heard Cartman's screams of pain as Kyle gave him the beating of a life time.

When Kyle finally finished beating Cartman, he looked around the jail. Though he saw Owen sitting in his corner like a good prisoner, Izzy was nowhere to be seen. The guards suddenly heard a whistle, and turned to see Izzy standing on a tree branch. The weird part about it was that she was decked out in full pirate garb.

"Alas my noble foes! Today is the day that you shall remember that you almost caught, Captain Izzy Sparrow!" When Izzy happily swung off on a vine into the forest, she gave the Bass members a raspberry. This unfortunately meant she was unable to see the tree she was about to collide with.

BAMM!

"I wonder if she is related to George of the Jungle by any chance," Dib said as he saw the girl slide off the tree she had hit. The others could not help but nod their heads in agreement.

* * *

"Man I hate it when a good plan goes bad," Jude said as he, Double D, Ed, Ron, and Jen all sat in the Gopher's jail.

"What plan!" Jen shouted angrily, "All we did was basically run right at them and hope they would give up." She and the other captured Bass glared at the laid back skateboarder, who did not seem to acknowledge their anger.

"Dudes," Jude said as a light bulb appeared over his head, "If no one is watching us, then why are we still sitting here?" His three teammates looked around, realizing that no one was guarding them. They all silently got up, and walked away.

* * *

"This should be good," Mandy said monotonously, as Tyler ran at her and the other Gopher guards. The jock was actually carrying a long wooden pole, and charging at them with it. When Tyler's pole touched the ground, he used it as a jumping pole. The wannabe jock would suddenly be flung up into the air, only to be hurtled into a tree on the opposite end of the clearing.

"He is so talented," Lindsey said dreamily. Mandy and Heather slapped their foreheads at her stupidity. Geoff had already slapped his head in his hiding place. How could so many of his teammates be stupid enough to attempt a full frontal assault. You would have to be a complete moron to come up with a plan like that.

* * *

"That could have gone better," Stewie said as both he and Brian had joined Cartman, Owen, and a dead Kenny.

"Well what the hell did you expect," Brian said, "We just made a full frontal attack without having any back up plan. It was freaking doomed from the start!"

"Shut up!" Stewie said.

"Be quiet you asshole!" Stan shouted as he and the other guards were now playing Texas hold um.

* * *

 **Stan:** Man, this island sure does have some weirdoes on it. I mean, there is a samurai named Jack, the Grim Reaper, a guy with yellow skin, a robot from the future that drinks alcohol, and an anthropomorphic horse, and they are the normal people. I hate even being in a ten foot radius of Izzy. Craziness seems to seep from her pores!

* * *

Jack was prowling trough the trees, waiting for the guards that were at the Gopher flag to lose focus. Just as he prepared to pounce, he heard a rustling in the bushes.

"We meet again!" Izzy shouted as she jumped onto his branch, "Samurai Jack!" For some reason, she was still wearing her Jack Sparrow outfit. In one swift motion, she pulled out a cutlass, and charged at the samurai. Jack swiftly jumped from the tree into the clearing. Unfortunately, this meant that the Gopher guards had spotted him. He was surrounded.

As he tried to think up a plan, the samurai noticed Geoff in the bushes. Jack then decided his best option was to become a decoy. He suddenly somersaulted over Izzy's head and stuck his tongue out at the Gophers. The guards all began to chase after him.

* * *

"Least somebody is thinking strategically," Geoff whispered to himself as he snuck out of the bushes. Jack had managed to get all of the guards to chase after him, so that he could get the flag. Geoff took one last glance around the clearing, before rushing to the flag, picking it up, and making a break for the border.

* * *

"Izzy has never seen Jack so intent on fighting Izzy before," Izzy shouted. She then stopped for a second. "But all he is doing is getting us angry and making us chase him," she said, before a horrified expression crossed her face, "away from the flag!"

The psycho-girl then turned to the other Gophers. "Come on!" she shouted, "Jack is just the decoy, someone has already stolen our flag!" The girls turned around and ran towards the Bass area. When Jack saw that they had figured out his plan, he hoped that Geoff was fast enough to get away.

* * *

"This is too easy," Geoff stated as he ran to the line that separated the two teams' areas. Just as he was about to cross it, he heard a great amount of ruckus coming from behind him. The cowboy turned to see Izzy swinging on a vine, chasing after him. Just as it appeared that Izzy would catch him, Geoff ducked, making Izzy miss him, and then hit a tree.

"Well that was convenient," Geoff said as a rather large bead of sweat formed on the back of his head. Geoff then felt a hand on his shoulder. He turned to see Gwen smirking as he shouted in surprise. Gwen had snuck up and caught him when he had been preoccupied with Izzy.

"You're going to jail, party boy," she said playfully, as Geoff turned over the flag to Heather. Geoff silently walked back to the jail, hoping that someone else was coming up with a plan.

* * *

 _(Ten minutes later)_

Geoff slapped his forehead for the umpteenth time that day, because in the last five minutes, Duncan, Ezekiel, and D.J. had all been caught, adding to the two Bass that had already been captured, Tyler and Geoff himself. Of them, D.J. was the one who had come the closest to actually getting the flag, because he had used Bunny's cuteness to distract Heather, Lindsey and Caitlin. Unfortunately, he had not taken evil incarnate, aka Mandy, into account. Duncan had tried to vine swing in to the flag, but he hit a tree. Ezekiel was the one who surprised him. The farm boy had been hiding in the woods when Izzy found him.

Because of the disaster that the current jail guard's résumé was, the Gophers had assigned the guard duty to the only member who might be able to make the Bass prisoners crack under stress.

"Prison Warden Izzy says," the insane red head said, "Ezekiel will lick the warden's boots clean." She had exchanged her pirate outfit for a police chief outfit. She was even dunking a donut into a cup of coffee.

"What!" the poor boy shouted. Izzy nonchalantly pulled out a whip, and snapped in at the farm boy. Ezekiel resigned himself to his fate, and began to lick the mud off the girls new police boots.

"Ah," Izzy moaned as the Bass watched their teammate in disgust, "It is good to be the Warden!"

* * *

 **Izzy:** I will have Ezekiel eating out of my hands very soon. I mean, come on, he's already licking my boots!

 **Ezekiel:** I don't know whether to be excited or terrified. On the one hand, she is a very beautiful girl who seems interested in me. That is good. On the other hand, she is an insane psychopath whose ultimate goal in life is to kill off the RCMP. That is bad, eh.

* * *

As Izzy began to torture her prisoners, the Bass had managed to cause some damage of their own. Harold's traps continued to work flawlessly, capturing both Leshawna and Nikki. As they were sitting in the jail, Leshawna decided it might be a good time to talk with some of the campers from the other team.

* * *

 **Leshawna:** Well, Andrew did say the merge happens after the first twenty go, and we are already down thirteen members. I need to make some contacts in the Bass, or who knows what could happen in the next segment of the show.

* * *

"So," Leshawna said turning to the boy with a large head, "You were pretty observant when you figured out Zim was an alien."

"Yeah," Dib said happily, "Finally someone praises me!"

"Shut the hell up Dib!" Stan said as he continued to play cards with Kyle, "She is just trying to trick you into letting her go or an alliance."

Many of those present, including Leshawna, were shocked. He had figured that out all on his own? "You must be a pretty smart kid," Leshawna said as she focused her efforts on Stan, "I bet you realize how important an alliance can be."

"So why should he bother working with you when he already has an alliance," Kyle said, as he picked up a card. He then explained, "Me, Stan and Kenny agreed to go to the final three together, so that is what we are going to do."

Leshawna sighed as she sat back down. Cartman then angrily sat up and shouted at them, "What about me!"

"Oh," Kyle said, "We will just get rid of you as soon as possible."

"Why the fuck would you betray me like that?" Cartman asked.

"We hate you," Stan said flatly.

"I fucking hate you guys!" Cartman screamed.

* * *

 **Cartman:** I will win the hundred grand, because Stan and Kyle said they would be my slaves if I won it all. And when I win, I will make them my slaves, because I hate those guys. I hate them so very, very fucking much! And I will not stop until I win this show, because I fucking hate those guys.

* * *

Jack felt pity for his teammates who had been captured by Izzy. But luckily, they had also distracted the most dangerous member of the Gophers away from the flag. Jack smiled as Heather began another tangent about how they needed to get rid of the Gophers she did not like, so he took the opportunity to strike.

With a swift somersault, Jack landed behind the girls, who were so deep into the conversation that they failed to notice him. Jack silently snuck up to the flag and grabbed it. When he turned around, he saw that none of the girls had even noticed him.

"This is too easy," he said to himself. In a moment of curiosity, he clapped his hands. None of the girls turned around.

"It can't be this easy," he said to himself again. He suddenly shouted at them, "Wake up!" They did still not turn around.

"Could it be this easy?" Jack asked himself as he walked back towards the woods. Just as he was about to cross into the brush, he heard a shout.

"Where do you think your going?" a voice cackled behind him. He turned around to see Izzy on the hill, "Samurai Jack!"

"I knew it was too easy," Jack said as he jumped into the woods. Izzy cackled as she chased him. Surprisingly, not one of the girls on Heather's alliance noticed them.

* * *

"I wonder how our teammates are doing," Harold said in a bored tone. He was still staring at the clouds, and was tired of having nothing to do. Peter, Homer, and Bender did not seem to care, as they were trying to amuse themselves by tossing rocks at one another. After several moments of watching the idiots pelt each other, Harold stood up. "I think I will go and see if I can help the others," he said, "Just make sure you keep the flag safe."

As he walked off, he did not hear Peter ask Homer, "What did that nerd say?"

"I don't know," Homer admitted, "But who cares, he's a nerd."

Both of the fat idiots and the robot laughed as they began to pelt each other with rocks again. Neither of them noticed a figure coming from the woods. A certain prankster seemed to smirk slightly when the three remaining guards went back to their game of beating the crap out of one another.

* * *

"At least we have a new guard," Geoff said as he sat in the Gopher jail. Due to the fact that Izzy was off chasing Jack, the Gophers had now reassigned Leela to be the jail guard. At least they weren't being forced to lick her shoes.

Leela then spotted something odd in the trees near the jail. It was a bright light being reflected into her eyes. When Leelawent to go see what it was, she accidently stepped in on a group of leaves. Suddenly, a net that was hidden under the leaves shot up from under her, and trapped her.

Harold smiled as he stepped out from the bushes. The captured Bass cheered when they realized that they had just been freed by the nature geek.

"Come on guys," Geoff said, "We got to get back and try to help Jack."

* * *

"I will catch you Samurai Jack!" Izzy shouted as the two warriors jumped through the trees. Izzy had yet to realize that they were only a few yards away from the line that separated the teams. If Jack made it, the Bass would finally win again.

When Jack and Izzy made it to the line, both looked shocked at what they saw.

There, with the Bass's flag in his hand, was Bart. He was smiling as he stood on the Gopher's side of the line, completely victorious.

"How did that happen," Harold shouted as he ran up to the young teenager.

"You see," Bart explained, "I waited for you to leave, so I could see a route through the traps so I used one of my stink bombs. When you were gone, all I had to do was sneak by Homer, Peter, ad Bender and then take the flag."

"Those idiots!" Harold screamed, as he fell to the ground in horror. Said idiots came running up to the gathering of campers.

"The flag was taken," Peter coughed as he and Homer bent down. The Bass glared at their fat teammates.

"We know that idiots," Duncan said angrily.

"You don't understand," Homer said, "When it was taken, there was this weird green smoke that zoomed past us, and took the flag. It might be a ghost."

"Bart has the flag," Geoff said unbelievably, "And he apparently used a stink bomb for cover."

"Looks like you lost this one, wide load," Bart chuckled.

"Why you little!" Homer yelled as he strangled Bart.

"Well I have to say," Chris said as he walked to the gathering of campers, "It looks like the Gophers have managed to pull another win from the jaws of defeat. Since Andrew isn't available to judge, I will hand out the MVC awards from now on. This week's award obviously goes to Baet, for getting the flag." Chris then pulled out a piece of paper and read it out loud. "This challenges reward is fresh sheets, new pillows, and blinds to keep the sun out of your eyes when you wake up."

The Gophers let out a cheer as they lifted Bart on their shoulders. As they carried the prankster to their cabin, the Bass glared at the two fattest and one robot members of their team. No matter what, one of them would be going home tonight.

* * *

"I have twenty-four marshmallows here tonight," Chris said as he showed the campers the plate of sweets, "One of you will not get a marshmallow, and will walk the dock of shame, take a ride on the boat of losers, and can never come back! Ever!"

"The first marshmallow goes to Jack."

The samurai caught the treat easily.

"Geoff, Double D, Morty, Bridgette, D.J., and Courage also receive marshmallows."

They all also caught their marshmallows. When D.J. and Bridgette caught their sweets, they smiled at one another and high-fived.

"Jude, Jen, Kyle, Stan, Ed, Eddy, Dib and Harold."

They also caught their marshmallows, with Harold giving out a small "yes" when he grabbed his.

"Duncan, Ron, Kim, Rick, Grim, Tyler, Ezekiel, and Bender all receive marshmallows."

Some of the Bass glared at Bender as he received his marshmallow.

They all smirked when both Peter and Homer began to sweat. Neither of them had received a marshmallow. The two looked at the last remaining marshmallow nervously.

"And the last marshmallow goes to…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…Peter."

"Yes!" Peter shouted when he caught his marshmallow. Homer let out a cry of despair when he realized that he had lost. Peter stared sadly at his friend, before giving the yellow man his marshmallow. The two fat guys hugged just as Homer began to walk to the boat. As Peter waved goodbye, many of the campers felt mildly bad for the guy. He had just lost his best friend on the island. Then they remembered all the stupid things the two had done, and walked away scowling at Peter.

* * *

D.J. smiled as he waved goodbye to Bridgette. They had just spent the evening looking out from the dock onto the lake, while petting Bunny and Courage. Just as he was about to enter the boy room, an arm reached out and grabbed him. He soon found himself face to face with Chef.

"What you doing with nature girl?" Chef asked the smaller young man.

"Just hanging out," D.J. said in response, "She is a really close friend of mine."

"You do realize if you are going to win us that money," Chef said with quiet anger, "that you are going to have to vote off your friends."

"What!" D.J. shouted.

"That's right," Chef said as he paced in front of the muscular teenager, "party cowboy, pink dog, and even that surfer girl you like so much will have to go if we are going to win. So don't get to comfortable with those friends of yours. I want you to meet me tomorrow morning for our first lesson."

D.J. silently stared at the ground while Chef walked back to his trailer. When the time came, what would he choose, the girl he loved, or a hundred grand.

* * *

 **Losers:** _Courtney, Zim, Noah, Eva, Sadie, Justin, Billy, Rusty, Trent, Cody, Beth, Wyatt, Katie, Homer_

 **AN: Man, I'm on a roll today! See you next chapter.**


	16. Chapter 16

Chris: Last time on Total Drama Island. With Andrew gone, I assigned the campers a challenge of capture the flag. Harold proved that he has some mad trapping skills, and Kenny could not help but test them out, resulting in his death, again. Jack managed to grab the Gopher flag, after several failed attempts by his Bass teammates. Unfortunately, Bart had managed to sneak the Bass's flag out from their territory, thus winning another challenge for the Gophers.

Of more interest however, was the fact that Izzy realized that Heather had an alliance, and built her own team to counteract it. Cartman, however, sold Heather this info for a stake in her alliance.

Will Cartman use his new found power to control how the votes play out in the Gopher team?

Will D.J. betray Bridgette in order to meet his part of the deal with Chef?

And will Kenny ever live through an episode?

Find out now, on Total Drama Island!

* * *

(Cue Theme song)

* * *

"Good morning Campers!" Chris shouted as he pushed open the doors to the mess hall. Chris smiled as he walked in to the lodge, enjoying the weird looks he was getting from the campers.

"Chris," Geoff said, with more than a little annoyance, "Why are you trying to steal my look."

Chris was indeed dressed out like a cowboy. He wore a large black ten gallon-hat, black boots, and a black belt. Chris pulled out a revolver and fired up into the ceiling. He emptied the gun, leaving a circle of six bullet holes in the roof. The campers quickly backed up against the wall on the other side of the kitchen. No one in their right mind should ever give Chris Mclean a gun.

"I will explain your challenge when you get outside," Chris said as he walked back through the doors, "Though my outfit should give you a good idea of what it will be about."

"Man," Lindsey said as she walked back to her seat, "That was scary."

"True," Duncan said as he sat down, "But not as scary as Chef's food." He then looked around, "he must be preparing the slop in the kitchen.

Bridgette looked around for a second. "Has anyone seen D.J.?" she asked worriedly. Everyone looked around for the kind hearted linebacker, who was nowhere to be seen.

* * *

D.J. was standing in a corner of Chef's kitchen, watching Chef pace through the room looking for ingredients. As Chef scurried around the kitchen, D.J. noticed that the ingredients he was using would not make any known dish. He suddenly turned his attention back to Chef when the big soldier began to speak to him.

"Listen D.J.," Chef said as he began to chop up the banana peels, rotten apples, and old shoes, "I am going to make you so confident, that you won't think twice about jumping off a cliff. No more Momma's boy, D.J." When Chef poured the sliced ingredients into the pot, he took out a spoon and forced it into D.J.'s mouth. D.J. cringed at the horrible concoction. "What you are tasting is pride, boy. Keep stirring the pot while I go help Chris with the challenge."

"If Chef wants pride," D.J. pulled out his Momma Spice and sprinkled it into the glop, "Momma will show him pride."

* * *

D.J. silently snuck into his seat, as Chef prepared to serve the dish that D.J. had tampered with. Duncan, hoping to get some strength in him before the next challenge, took a bite of the horrible concoction. After chewing for a few seconds, he suddenly swallowed easily, and said in a shocked tone, "It tastes incredible."

The others were rather unbelieving at first, tasted the slop. All of their eyes widened as the food actually tasted good now. As the campers began to eat the now great tasting food. Bridgette noticed something.

"This tastes familiar," she said. D.J. suddenly began to sweat when he realized she might have figured out that he made the food, but the thought seemed to escape her, and she remained quiet. D.J. sighed when he remembered his and Chef's conversation the night before.

* * *

 **Bridgette:** I remember tasting that food somewhere before. I just can't place where.

 **D.J.:** I don't know if I can go through with Chef's plan. I really like Bridgette. And I am sure that my Momma would be disappointed in me for going through with this alliance.

* * *

As the Campers went out onto the main camp courtyard, they suddenly heard a chopper against the wind. Izzy prepared herself to face off against the RCMP, only to be shocked when Chris came up in an extremely large helicopter. Chris stuck his head out to explain.

"Today's challenge happens outside of camp," he said as the campers reluctantly went inside the giant aerial transport. As they took off, the campers all smiled as they left the horrible place that had already delivered so much torture on them. Even if it was just for one day.

* * *

"So cowpokes," Chris said as they landed in a run down part of Montreal, "How does it feel to be back in the city?"

"Ah, smog," Harold said fondly, before Duncan pushed him off the chopper. As the campers filed out of the helicopter, Chef drove out in a long open tour bus. The campers got into the vehicle, as it took them inside the old set.

"As you can see," Chris said as they drove around the set, "We are on a crummy, old, run-down, crappy film lot." The campers looked around for a second, and could not help but agree with him.

"While you are here," Chris continued, "You will be completing a challenge based on the old west. I will explain how when we actually reach the cowboy movie part of the lot. So, to pass the time," Chris then stood up, and began motioning to the left, "To your left, is the scene in the disaster movie, _House of Flames_." The campers turned to the left, and only saw a large smoldering pile of ash.

"It is just a pile of dust," Stan pointed out.

"I know," Chris said, "The house burned down in production."

The campers groaned as the host continued to explain the sets on the lot. This was going to be a long tour.

* * *

"Welcome to the western set," Chris said as the campers got off the bus, "This is the location of your next challenge." As the campers dismounted the bus, they saw that they were standing on actual sand, and that the buildings were real. "In today's challenge, the two teams will be assigned two very distinctive groups of people in the old west, the townsfolk, and the outlaws."

Chris smiled as he pulled out black and white hats. "The Bass will be the outlaws," he threw black hats to the Bass team, "And the Gophers will be the townsfolk." He then threw the white hats to the Gopher team. "In this challenge, the outlaws' job is to steal the bag of money from the bank in the town, and then escape. The money is held in a safe in the bank, which the outlaws must open." The host then pulled out a rifle. "Both teams will be equipped with firearms, which have been outfitted to shoot non-harmful lasers. If you get hit, there is a special material in you outfits that are going to be provided, that will drop you to the ground, unable to move."

"Since the Bass will be forced not only to come into town without the protection of buildings," Chris said, "They will be provided with more, and longer ranged, weaponry." While he threw some six-shooters to the Gophers, he threw revolvers and rifles to the Bass. The Bass will move out of this small nine block area, and prepare for the heist, while the Gophers will stay here to start making your positions."

The campers reluctantly went to their positions, and prepared for the epic battle that was about to take place. "Won't this be fun?" Chris asked Chef, who was wearing a dress. Chef angrily glared at the host, grabbed him by the neck, and dunked him in a water trough.

* * *

 _(Gophers)_

"Obviously," Heather said as she began to assign roles, "I will guard the bank, since I am the only one who is smart enough to not be fooled by any of their tricks." She was wearing a customary white hat, blue shirt and brown kakis.

"No way," Nikki said, also wearing the same outfit, "You nearly cost us the challenge last time, we need someone who can actually pay attention to what is going on in the challenges."

"Fine," Izzy said as she walked in, "Why don't we let Owen guard the safe, he is so big that he would be pretty hard to beat in a closed in area." The others nodded with this statement, until they noticed Izzy's outfit. For some reason, she was wearing a Scottish kilt, and along with her revolver, she had a long sword attached to her back, and a bagpipe in her arms.

"Izzy," June asked hesitantly, "Why are you dressed like a Scotsman."

"Oh ya see laddie," Izzy spoke in a Scottish accent, "Me family didn't come to America until the days of the Wild West were over. So, the producer said I could dress in this as long as it had the special knockout linen." She then began to play a tune on the pipes, which caused many of the Gophers to cringe in pain. After Izzy finished playing, Brian looked around and noticed something.

"Has anyone seen Gwen?" he asked. Leela leaned into the girl's dressing room.

"Gwen," she shouted, "You have to come out some time."

Gwen sulked as she walked out of the changing room. She was now wearing a pale blue dress, with a white apron in front. She looked up into the sky and raised her hands into the air. "What cruel god would put me in a dress!" she shouted sadly, "Why am I the only one who has to wear one."

"Proobably Chris just trying to make life woorse for yoo than it alrrready is," Izzy said in her customary Scottish drawl. Gwen screamed in frustration at her predicament. Why did she ever sign up for this show?

* * *

 _(Bass)_

"Okay guys," Geoff said, having changed his customary brown hat for a black one, "We need a plan to get that money out of the bank. Jack, Rick, Double D, Duncan, any of you guys have an idea."

"I think we should separate into three teams," Double D said as he pulled out a chart of the set, "The first team should make a headlong assault on the front of the set, hopefully drawing most of the Gophers attention. Then, the second team will sneak in a back way through the set, into the bank. They will try to break open the safe and get the money through the door of the safe. If by some chance the first two teams fail, the third team will attempt to cut through the roof into the safe, which is more like a bank vault than a normal safe. They will then transport the money, without anyone from the Gophers realizing what they are doing."

"Nice," Geoff said, "So, let's get our teams organized, and get ready to go rob a bank." All of the Bass cheered, particularly Duncan.

* * *

 **Duncan:** What can I say; I was born to be in this challenge.

 **Double D:** I cannot say I condone stealing. If mother and father watched this, I would have to preform another week's worth of sticky note delivered chores. But, I do not think they even watch TV. They are always so busy at work.

 **Kim:** Look, as much fun as this challenge sounds, I am a secret agent. I really don't condone any of the actions my team will use during this next challenge.

* * *

Team one, made up of Geoff, D.J., Bridgette, Jude, Ezekiel, Tyler, Peter, Rick, Jen, Stan, Kyle, Eddy, Courage and Grim, entered the nine block set of the cow town. As they walked through the old wooden buildings, they heard floor boards creak. A second later, they saw a small red laser streak by them. The Bass all ducked for cover, as the street light up in bright lights. The Gophers had set up an ambush.

As Geoff hid behind a barrel, he noticed that Kenny was sniping at them from a balcony. When he tried to shoot the parka wearing boy, his revolver did not posses a long enough range to hit the boy. He then saw that Grim was hiding inside a store that he was sitting next to. Geoff, waved at Grim, and then pointed at Kenny. Grim, who had a rifle instead of a revolver, aimed it at the boy, and fired. The shot was accurate, as it hit Kenny.

Unfortunately, Kenny was leaning too far over the edge of the balcony when he was shot, and his now heavy clothes caused him to fall from the Balcony into a water trough. Kenny's muffled screams were gurgled by the water, and eventually the bubbles around Kenny stopped floating to the surface.

"Oh my God!" Stan shouted as he peaked his head out from a hay bail, "he killed Kenny!"

"You Bastard!" Kyle screamed while hiding under a chair.

"Prepare to die Kahl," Cartman shouted as he raced into the street, pistols blazing. The fat-boy unfortunately had run into the street without any cover. So the entire Bass team fired at him, causing the boy from South Park to fall to the ground immobile.

The Bass were then forced to dive back in to their hiding places for cover, as the Gophers let out a withering fire. As Geoff hid behind his barrel, he said to Grim, "I hope the others are having an easier time in this challenge than we are." For some reason, Geoff's hat was shot off his head, causing the cowboy to duck farther down in fear.

* * *

 **Geoff:** How did Chris pay for these special guns, it must have cost a fortune.

 **Chris:** Yeah, kind of bought all of it with Andrew's credit card. Since that kill joy is not around, he can't do anything to stop me. (Suddenly realizes he is bragging to a camera, with footage that Andrew will see) Oh crap!

* * *

Team two was made up of Dib, Double D, Ed, Morty, Duncan, Bender, and Harold. The seven silently entered the set in a back street, and, while nearly all the Gophers were concentrating their attacks on group one, they snuck up to the bank's porch. As they leaned their heads inside the wooden structure, they saw that Owen was snoring as he sat in a chair with his feet on a table.

The seven safe crackers tiptoed past the sleeping teen, and towards the vault, where Harold pulled out a stethoscope. As Harold began to pick the lock, Duncan accidently leaned back. This unfortunately caused the table that Owen's feet were resting on to collapse, because Duncan's added weight was too much for it.

Owen, suddenly off balance, fell to the ground, waking up with a start. As Owen stood up, he saw the Bass attempting to open the safe. The large teen reached for his pistol, only to realize it was actually on the table that Duncan had destroyed.

Owen, realizing he was outnumbered and outgunned, ran from the room screaming. Before he could get away, he was shot by Dib, and fell to the ground on the road in front of the Bank. The heavy teen had been successful in alerting the other Gophers, however, and they rushed to stop the bank robbers. While Harold and Double D began to pick the lock, Duncan, Dib, Morty, Ed, and Bender fired their rifles through the window while the locked the door. They were trapped.

* * *

"What are we going to do?" Geoff asked loudly as he paced in front of team one, "Team two is trapped, and if we try to help them, we will be sitting ducks!"

"Why don't we get team three to make their move," Bridgette suggested, "Team two can act as a decoy, while they get the loot by cutting through the ceiling."

"Good idea," Geoff said, before grabbing Stan by the collar.

"What the hell are you doing!" the boy shouted, and he was answered by Geoff tossing him up onto the roof of the bank. The other Bass just stared as the party lover.

"What the hell were you thinking!" Kyle shouted at Geoff. Geoff turned around and pointed at the roof, where Stan was talking to Jack, Kim, and Ron, the members of team three.

"Oh."

* * *

"So," Kim said as her hand grabbed the breach of her nose, "apparently team two is trapped, and we are going to have to bail them out, is that what your saying."

"Yeah," Stan said, as he continued to try to catch his breath.

"Well," Ron said as he pulled out a saw, "Let's get cracking. Hopefully the guys down inside the Bank will be able to hold them off long enough for us to steal the money." He suddenly looked up to see horrified looks on his teammates as they stared behind at something behind him. "Let me guess," he said nonchalantly, "One of the Gophers, most likely Izzy, is standing behind me, and has figured out our plans, and is now preparing to shoot me." The others nodded.

"Son of a freaking bi-"

Ron was suddenly hit with a laser, which knocked him off the roof. Luckily, his pants caught on an old nail. This led to an unfortunate accident where Ron fell out from his pants onto the ground. "Oh come on, even here in Canada I can't stay stop losing my pants!"

"I hoope yoo ready to loose," Izzy said, keeping her Scottish drawl. Just as she aimed the gun at Stan, Jack pulled out his sword and slashed the gun in half. Izzy responded by drawing out her long sword. "Prepare for a battle to the death Samurai Jack."

She then played a war tune on her bagpipe, which caused Jack to cover his ears in pain. In one quick motion, Jack stabbed the instrument, causing it to deflate. "You'll pay for that Laddie!"

As the two aces of the teams began to engage in another epic battle, Stan stared at Kim. "So does this mean that it is up to us to cut through all of this wood?"

"Pretty much," Kim responded.

"Shit!"

* * *

"Will you dorks come and help us!" Duncan shouted as he, Morty, Dib, Ed, and Bender attempted to hold off the entire Gopher team. Double D and Harold were trying their hardest to open the vault, but apparently there was not one, but five locks they would have to pick. While they had already finished the first three locks, they were having a lot of trouble with the fourth.

Dib suddenly saw Geoff, who was hiding behind a crate near an intersection of two roads. Geoff suddenly made a forward motion with his hand, and Peter, Rick, Grim, Tyler, Ezekiel, and Kyle charged out of their hiding places, towards the bank. The Gophers then switched their focus away from the Bass fortified in the bank to those without cover.

Peter, being the largest of all the people in the attack, went down first by a nice headshot from Gwen. As soon was hit, Kyle was picked off by Gwen. Just as the others were about to enter the bank, Tyler tripped, allowing Gwen to hit him too, while Rick, Ezekiel, and Grim managed to enter the bank safely.

* * *

 **Gwen:** Got to say, I rocked this challenge. They way I did it was by imagining each one of them was Chris. And I was using real bullets… from a machine gun.

* * *

"What the heck are you doing here?" Duncan said as he hid below the window. Ezekiel then turned to the ex-delinquent.

"Geoff told us to tell you that plan A has been aborted, eh," the poor boy coughed, trying to catch his breath. Harold and Double D suddenly stopped working on the lock.

"So much for us being the heroes," Harold said sadly, before walking up to the doorway, and sticking his rifle through it.

"So that means were supposed to stay here, draw the Gophers fire," Duncan said, his eyes widening in realization, "and basically be sitting ducks."

"That's plan B in a *burp* nutshell," Rick said as he lined up his revolver from one side of the window.

"Son of a freaking bi-"

* * *

 **Duncan:** I really am getting pissed off by Geoff. I mean, what have I done to you that basically makes me no more important than cannon fodder.

 **Geoff:** You did the exact same thing to me two challenges ago. Revenge is sweet!

* * *

Jack and Izzy continued their duel on the roof tops, neither one giving an inch. Despite Jack's incredible techniques and skills, the sword was strong enough to withstand any attack he hit it with. Jack then noticed something familiar about the sword she wielded.

"Crazy Red-headed Girl," Jack said, trying to get her attention, "Where did you get that sword?"

"It's been in da family for years," Izzy explained, swinging the sword at Jack, "It first belonged to my great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great grandfather four hundred years ago. His name has been lost to time, but the world knows him as the Scotsman."

Jack's eyes widened as he remembered a friend with the exact same nickname. He then realized on the sword were the same runes that had caused him so many problems during his first duel with the warrior from the north. It brought so many memories back, of the old world and a certain someone. Jack silently put his sword back into its scabbard, and then fell through a gap between buildings. Izzy growled when she realized that the Samurai had escaped again.

She suddenly saw Jack's rifle, and remembered the challenge. "Oh crap," she muttered, before rushing back to the bank, rifle in hand. The Bass's chance of victory began to slip away.

* * *

Well that went better than expected," Harold said happily as he was lifted, to the top of the bank, money in hand. Kim and Stan had managed to cut through the ceiling into the vault, and then helped get the remains of team two onto the roof. All they had to do now was escape the town, and they would be home free. Just as they prepared to make a run for freedom, a laser bolt shot out, striking Dib. They turned to see Izzy, standing on another roof top, wearing a smile that usually graced Chris's face. She suddenly fired another shot at the Bass, which hit Ezekiel.

"Alright," Izzy said as she pumped her fist, "two for two. And one of them is a cute prairie boy."

Kim suddenly jumped in front of Izzy, and knocked her gun away. "You guys take the money," she said, "I'll hold Izzy off."

As the remaining Bass escaped off the other side of the building, Izzy sucker punched Kim, who quickly recovered. "I have no time for you," Izzy said, "The only rival I have is Samurai Jack!"

"Well see about that," Kim said as she suddenly swipe kicked at Izzy's feet, which the crazy girl swiftly dodged.

* * *

Geoff was trying to understand what was going on. For some reason, he, along with all of the remaining Bass were running from the Gophers. From what he could understand, the remaining members of teams two and three had been ambushed by Izzy, and Kim was busy holding her off. Unfortunately, the Gophers had the Bass badly outnumbered, and were using those numbers to pick off the retreating Bass members. Even Jack and Rick were hit with a laser.

Just as Double D went down, the sock-hatted nerd threw the sack to Geoff, who was the last Bass member still standing. Geoff smirked when he saw that he was only a few yards away from the escape line. Just as he was about to cross it, he heard a shout from behind him. Gwen was rushing at him, rifle in hand.

It appeared to be too late however; Geoff was just about to cross the line. But before he could, a beaten form was thrown in front of him. It was the bloody and bruised body of Kim. Izzy cackled from the roof tops. When Geoff tried to dodge the falling body of Kim, Gwen tackled him from behind, pushing Geoff to the ground, and winning the challenge for the Gophers.

"Looks like the Gophers have won four straight," Chris said from a helicopter as it hovered over the fake town, "Not only do they win invincibility, they have also earned a 100 dollar gift certificate to their favorite store."

The Gophers let out a cheer of joy as they raised their weapons into the air, victorious. When Gwen jumped up in victory, she jumped over Geoff's head. Due to the fact that she was wearing a dress rather than her normal attire, Geoff certainly got an eyeful. Gwen then blushed when she realized what she had done, and helped Geoff to his feet.

"Okay campers," Chris said happily, "let's head back to that crappy island so we can vote off another of your sorry butts."

* * *

 **Geoff:** There are a lot of people who messed up on this challenge, though I am forced to vote for the guy who got hit first.

 **Duncan:** You sent me to juvie pal, and I am a guy who carries a grudge. I have a long memory.

 **D.J.:** Sorry, but you are the one who seems to deserve it the most for your poor performance in this challenge.

 **Gwen:** (Wearing MVC medal) I suppose I should be happy. I am tied with Morty for being the most valuable camper again, plus, the dress thing could have gone worse. It could have been completely ripped apart.

* * *

"Wow," Chris said as he sat on a stool during the ceremony, "And you guys are supposed to be the perennial winners."

"Shut it," Duncan spat.

"Fine, Marshmallows go to Geoff, D.J., Double D, Jack, Rick, Harold, Dib, Ezekiel, Morty, Courage, Jude, Jen, Bridgette, Bender, Ed, Eddy, Stan, Kyle, Tyler, Grim, Peter, and Kim did not receive a vote." They all caught their marshmallows happily, and began to munch on them. Both Ron and Duncan began to fidget with terror, as they realized that one of them would be going home.

"And the last marshmallow goes to…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…Duncan."

"What!" Kim shouted, as Ron sadly grabbed his bags and headed for the docks. As he hugged Kim goodbye, Ron waved to the rest of the Bass, and boarded the boat of losers. The Bass all returned the wave, even Duncan, although he did so grudgingly.

* * *

Geoff sighed as he walked back to the cabin. The Bass really needed to win the next challenge, or they would lose their numerical advantage. He then heard a whistle, and turned to see Gwen leaning on the porch railing.

"Hey cowboy," she said, smirking slightly before asking, "Liked what ya saw?"

As Geoff babbled incoherently for a few seconds, while Gwen laughed at his shyness, no one noticed a silent tune from the highlands was being played.

Izzy played a soft tune that her mother had taught her. The tune was apparently the song that her ancestor, the Scotsman, had played when he met his best friend. It was known to be lucky for the Fitz-Patrick family, and she played it every time she felt like she needed just a little more help in her life.

While she played, she failed to notice Jack, who was sitting in a near by tree. As the warrior listened to the tune, he began to reminisce on his friends he had once had on his original journey and the one person he had come to truly love.

* * *

 **Losers:** _Courtney, Zim, Noah, Eva, Sadie, Justin, Billy, Eddy, Trent, Cody, Beth, Wyatt, Katie, Homer, Ron_


	17. Chapter 17

Chris: Last time on Total Drama Island. The campers headed to the city of Montreal, to have a shootout in an old film lot. The Gophers were to keep the Bass from stealing a ton of cash from the bank in the lot. Grim killed Kenny, Izzy beat up Kim, and Geoff got to see Gwen's underwear. In the end, The Bass team lost its fourth straight challenge, and voted off Mr. lose-his-pants-a-lot, Ron.

Will the Bass finally regain that spark that helped them win five straight challenges?

Will Izzy and Jack continue their rivalry?

And will Kenny ever get through an episode alive?

Find out now, on Total Drama Island!

* * *

 _(Cue Theme Song)_

* * *

"Listen up you little cockroaches," Chef screamed over the intercom, "Everyone is to report to the dock of shame at o nine hundred hours." All of the campers looked around at one another confusedly. "That means now soldiers, now!" The campers shouted in fear as they ran to the docks.

There, they saw Chef, wearing military attire. As he examined the forty-five remaining campers, he smirked when he walked past D.J. This was going to be easy. All he had to do was make life easier for D.J. than the rest, and he would be one step closer to a whole lot of money.

"This is going to be a fun day," Mandy said sarcastically to June.

"What was that soldier?" Chef shouted at the Goth through a megaphone.

"Nothing," Mandy said fearfully. Many of the campers cringed when they realized that even she was scared of the military man.

"And you will continue to say nothing," Chef said, "until I say you can say something." Chef began to pace in front of the campers, and began to speak to all of them. "Today's challenge will not be an easy one," he continued, "In fact; I expect some of you will not survive." He suddenly punched Owen when the big-boned boy chuckled. "My orders are to make sure that all but one of the babies in front of me drops out. The last one standing wins immunity for their team."

"What happened to Chris?" Heather asked hesitantly.

"Rule number one," Chef shouted into the megaphone, you will address me, as Master Chief. Have You Got That!"

"Yes Master Chief!" the campers exclaimed fearfully.

"Rule number two," Chef shouted, holding up two fingers, "You will sleep when I tell you to sleep, and you will eat, only when I tell you to eat, is that clear!" He finished this tangent by shouting in Jude's face.

"Yes master Chief!"

"Rule number three," Chef shouted, "When you are ready to give up, you will go to the end of the dock, and ring the bell." Chef pointed at the bell near the edge of the dock of shame. "Which brings me to rule number four, I would like to eliminate the first baby before the first day is over, and that day will not end until somebody drops out." Chef then turned back to the campers. "So get your butts to the beach! Now soldiers! Now!" The campers screamed as the raced to the beach.

* * *

 **Gwen:** Okay, whoever's sick, twisted idea this was to place this guy in charge of a challenge, I have to say… I'm kinda impressed.

 **Brian:** This will be a piece of cake. I have already gone through boot camp, so this should be a synch.

* * *

"Your first challenge," Chef said to the campers while standing on a beach, "Is to hold a canoe over your heads. I catch you taking your hands off the canoe, you will be eliminated. And no one eats lunch, until someone drops out." The campers cringed as Chef chuckled evilly. "Canoes Up!"

As the campers lifted their boats up, the two teams were surprised at how easy the challenge was going.

"This isn't that hard," Owen said.

"Piece of cake," Geoff answered.

* * *

The task was no longer easy after three hours, as the baking midday heat was cooking the teams. There task was even harder now, because both Chris and Chef were now sitting on the canoes.

"Guess none of you are hungry," the former military man said insultingly, "So I suppose you won't be eating lunch." He then paused for a second to readjust his glasses. "Unless one of you wants to drop out?" Owen's stomach growled after several seconds,

"Don't even think about it Owen!" Izzy shouted irately.

"Ah, screw it!" Cartman shouted as he let his part of the boat down. The other Gophers were shocked at Cartman's selfishness and laziness.

"Looks like we got ourselves a quitter!" Chef said gleefully.

The Gophers groaned as Cartman rang the bell, quitting the challenge. The two teams threw the canoes off, as Chef walked up to Cartman.

"You have nothing to be ashamed of son," Chef said, before yelling, "Except being a big fat quitter!" The amount of air he realized in his voice was strong enough to knock him over. "As for the rest of you, head to the mess hall, lunch is served!"

* * *

"Listen up maggots," Chef said as he stood by a collection of trash cans, "You have ten minutes to eat before we begin evening training."

As the campers groaned, Chef went to the staff tent in order to get real food; his gloating caused many of the campers to glare at him. When he left, no one saw D.J. secretly putting some of his Momma's Spice into the trashcans. So when the campers ate the trash, at least it was edible.

"How's it going Jen?" Jude asked in his laid back manner.

"This show is evil!" Jen said as she slowly slurped up some left over pasta, "I am being forced to eat garbage for Christ's sake!"

"Come on," Jude said, "This isn't so bad."

As Jude said this, Kenny suddenly started coughing. After several seconds, he started rolling on the floor while hyperventilating. Eventually his eyes rolled up in a death like state. Suddenly, from his hood, a chicken bone came out a puddle of drool.

"Oh my God!" Stan screamed, "They killed Kenny!"

"You Bastards!" Kyle exclaimed as he stuck his head outside the tent.

* * *

After dumping Kenny's corpse and finishing their meals, the campers were forced outside. As the sun set, Chef turned on a radio, and began to do a rip off of _Thriller._ The campers all moaned as they began to also do the dance, trying to keep up with the strange moves the old army corporal was making.

"You're not that bad," Jude said to Jen, who was completing the moves quickly.

"This is easy," Jen replied, "This guy is a pushover. My boss is ten times worse than this guy."

Mean while, Geoff and Gwen were dancing right next to each other. Geoff smirked as he saw Gwen stumble around as she danced.

"Having a little trouble there, Gwen?" Geoff asked slyly. Gwen scowled as she continued to dance.

"Say one more word and I will make you eat mud, cowboy," she seethed.

"Alright," Geoff said fearfully, "chill, sorry."

"No talking while dancing!" Chef shouted from the platform he was dancing on.

After about five minutes of continuous dancing, the music suddenly stopped. Chef angrily glared down at Duncan, who had turned off the rip off music. The campers all sighed in relief as they suddenly sat down to take a break.

"If one of us drops out," Duncan explained, "were done for the day." He said to a relieved group of campers, who all sighed in relief as Duncan went to the dock to ring the bell.

"Not so fast," Chef said, grabbing Duncan by the collar, "You aren't going to get out that easy." He then turned to the campers and smirked.

"Don't worry kiddies;" Chef said sadistically, "I have one more challenge left before you turn in for bed. But first, anyone have something else to say?"

"Yeah," all eyes turned to Gwen, "Can I go to the bathroom?"

* * *

"This is not what I had in mind," Gwen sighed as she began to mop up the floor of the bathroom.

* * *

"For your next challenge," Chef said as he and the campers waited in the dining hall, "Your task is to write a three hundred word essay about how much you love me." He then noticed the exhausted appearance of most of the campers. "Anyone who falls asleep, or fails to complete the challenge, will be eliminated."

The campers started to write the incredibly tedious essay at eight-thirty, and where startled when Chef shouted, "Times Up!" at ten.

As Chef began to take up all of the papers, he began to read Duncan's. "I love Chef Hatchet because he is very, very, very, very, very…" The sergeant stopped reading. "This is just one long sentence full of verys."

"It is three hundred words exactly," Duncan explained. Chef then turned angrily to see a sleeping Jonesy, Nikki, Ed, Shake, Meatwad, Caitlin, Stan, Kyle, and Courage. Everyone else, besides Jude, Jen, Duncan, Jack, Grim, Rick, Geoff, Gwen, Owen, Bojack, Brian, Heather, Harold, Double D, Ezekiel, Izzy and Leshawna had been unable to complete there sheets, so they were also eliminated. Chef scowled, he would have to make up for D.J.'s exhaustion on his own.

"Everyone go to bed. For those of you that are still in the competition, meet out in the courtyard at o five hundred hours for your next challenge."

* * *

It was five am in the morning, and the remaining campers were all standing in front of an obstacle course, that was muddy, had swinging axes, and climbing walls. "You will all run this course, until you can complete it in under one minute," Chef explained, before blowing his whistle.

The campers suddenly jumped onto the obstacle course, running their hardest so they could go get some sleep. Some were easily able to get through the obstacles, like Duncan and Gwen. Others had problems. Harold was barely able to climb the wall, and fell onto the other side. When he tried to stand up, he spat out a great amount of mud, and he was eliminated from the challenge.

As Duncan snickered about his rival's defeat, Chef yelled at him to continue the obstacle course. After ten go arounds, only Jack, Brian, and Izzy had managed to complete the course. As Duncan crawled by a stuck Leshawna, he taunted her. "Fallen soldier, I salute you!" He was then shocked to see Chef looking down at him.

"You just bought yourself twenty more push ups!" the drill sergeant shouted.

"Thank you sir," Duncan said, before giving the big man a kiss on the nose. Chef's blood began to boil. Many of the campers stopped what they were doing to look at Chef in horror.

"I think you pushed him over the edge bro," Geoff said fearfully to Duncan.

"You might be right about that one," Duncan conceded.

Chef suddenly smirked evilly. "One night of solitary confinement," Chef said, before adding, "In the boat house."

All of the campers gasped when they heard the punishments location. Duncan just shrugged it off.

"What's the worst thing that could happen," Duncan said nonchalantly, "It can't be that scary."

* * *

 **Geoff:** (Slaps forehead) that is the one thing you never say, because it will come back to bite you.

 **Harold:** Idiot!

* * *

Duncan was wrong; it was very, very scary. The house was covered in hooks, teeth, dead fish, and boating supplies. Duncan held himself while he sighed in frustration.

"Me and my big mouth."

* * *

"Is anyone else sick of Duncan playing fast and loose in this game?" Kim asked her fellow remaining campers. All of the Bass and several of the Gophers all nodded their heads.

"But what can we do?" Geoff said sadly, "We don't want to lose another challenge, and Duncan is in the boat house."

"Chef is in his tent right now," Kim said, "I say we do something and let Duncan get blamed for it."

"But what could we do that Duncan would be blamed for?" Harold asked sadly. He really wanted to get back at that jerk for making his life miserable.

"Once a thief," Kim said slyly, "always a thief."

The Bass, Gwen, Izzy, and even Bart huddled together to make a plan to get back at the jail bird.

And like all great plans, it started with cheese.

* * *

Chef was smiling as he watched his favorite channel. No one showed what he loved more than the My Little Pony. He sighed as he sipped his cup of fresh black coffee. Yes, life was good.

He suddenly smelled a delicious aroma over the smell of his coffee. It made his lips water, but he wondered what it could be. He suddenly looked outside, and realized what the smell was. It was a giant hunk of cheddar cheese sitting on a plate. It had a tag that said, 'to Chef, from Chris.'

Chef was too enamored by the cheese to notice a few glaring problems in the story that Chris had given him a hunk of cheese. The first problem was that Chris was currently spending a few days off sight in order to get a pedicure. The second, and more glaring reason why the story about the cheese was wrong, was that Chris would never send a present to anyone, not even his own mother. So, after a few seconds, it was no surprise when Chef collapsed in a sleepy thud. Jen and Jude gave a high five as they snuck out of the bushes where they had been hiding, entering Chef's tent, where he had his own fridge sitting out in the open.

* * *

 **Jen:** You think Chef would be smart enough to hide the chloroform. He left it sitting out on the counter in the infirmary. And the entire camp hates him, so he should have been more carful about the cheese. (Suddenly stops for a moment and taps her chin) You think this island attracts idiots.

* * *

"Man," Jude said as he held open a burlap sack, "I never knew that Chef had all of this great food just stashed in his fridge."

"If we get caught," Jen said as she cautiously placed a container of gelatin in the sack, "We will be in such big trouble."

"Luckily for us," Jude smirked as he grabbed a can of peaches, "We won't be the people being caught." Jen gained an identical smirk, before she pulled out something from behind her back.

"From the Killer Bass," she said happily, as she placed the fish were all of the food used to be. The two then snuck away to the cabins, snickering about how well phase one had gone.

* * *

All of the campers were sitting in the Bass cabin, eating the delicious goodies that Jude and Jen had stolen. As Owen downed a jar of toe jam, he suddenly held his foot up to Nikki.

"I think that obstacle course gave me toe jam," he said. Nikki was so disgusted by him, she poked her head out the window and purged.

Meanwhile, Gwen was talking with Bridgette, Leshawna, D.J., and Geoff.

"And what is with all these lame war stories," Gwen said, before taking a bite of her giant cookie, "He is so demented."

"Let me tell ya something," Leshawna said, "My feet weren't meant for combat training."

"Seriously," Bridgette said as she stroked Courage, who was enjoying a bottle of pop, "if I wanted to join the army, I would have."

"Got to say Jen," Jude said as he chewed on an apple, "You can do some pretty cool things when you aren't completely focused on listening to the rules."

"What can I say," Jen replied, "I guess all of those years working for Coach Halder, I probably got tired of being pushed around."

"Awesome bra," Jude said, admiring the brunette as she chugged a bottle of soda.

"Guys," Harold said as he took a bite of his apple, "When are we going to prank Duncan?"

"Right about…," Kim said, as Chef's voice came over the intercom.

"Attention campers," Chef shouted, "Your training continues at seven tomorrow morning. And if I find who stole my food, I will kick your ass all the way to Detroit."

"…Now," Kim said as she and the remaining pranksters grabbed what was left of the food and rushed to the boat house. When the entered the wooden building, the saw that Duncan was still sleeping. The quietly placed the discarded food next to him, and then high tailed it out of there.

"What the heck," Duncan mumbled as he woke up, and saw the discarded containers. He was startled when he heard the door slam open, revealing an irate Chef.

"So you are the little thief, eh?" Chef said. He then grabbed the punk by the ear. "I have a special punishment for you in the next challenge."

* * *

"I'll get you jerks back for this," Duncan said to his teammates, as the remaining campers all hung from a tree, upside down. Duncan, however, also had giant weights tied to his arms. The other campers snickered as Chef began to pace past the tree.

"What you are experiencing is an ancient form of torture," Chef said, "You will begin to grow dizzy as the blood rushes to your head.

Thud!

Duncan was currently lying on the ground, unable to hold himself up any longer. Jack realized that they would not last much longer. He silently reached up to the branch he was hanging on, and grabbed a hold of it. All of the other campers began to do the same.

Owen was not nearly as flexible as the others, and he was unable to grab the branch. As he reached for it, he farted, right at Heather and Brian.

"Oh God no!" Brian said, before fainting. He knew he would rue the day he was born with unusually large nostrils.

"That is it," Heather said angrily, suddenly jumping off the tree acrobatically, "I am done with this." She landed gracefully, only to be crushed under Owen, who could no longer hold onto the branch. "Get off me you big ox!" the queen bee shouted, as she managed to dislodge herself from under the teen.

"Whoa!" Jen shouted, losing her grip. She fell to the ground, lightly hitting her head.

"Jen!" Jude shouted as he saw his friend fall. He quickly jumped down to see how she was doing. He smiled when he saw that she was okay.

"It's down to our four final members," Chef said, as he walked by, "Can you handle the pressure?"

"Oh yeah," Gwen said, giving them a thumbs up, "I got this."

"Right on!" Geoff shouted, "I live for the head rush!" Five seconds later, both of them fell to the ground in sickening thuds.

Now it was between the old rivals, Jack and Izzy. Both began to have a staring contest, not letting up in their ferocity. After several seconds, Izzy's cheeks started to turn red, and within a minute, she would fall to the ground, out cold.

The Bass cheered as Jack had finally helped them win another challenge. As Jack hopped down from the branch, Chef walked up to the Asian man and saluted him.

"Congratulations Jack," Chef said, "I would go to war with you any time."

"Thank you," Jack said softly while returning the salute. The Bass all picked him on their shoulders, and began to carry him to their cabin for a party. No one saw the tear of pride that slipped down Chef's cheek. Chef wiped it away, before throwing the samurai the MVC medal, and walking back to get ready to drive the next camper on the boat.

* * *

"Were in trouble," Heather said, as she and her alliance began to prepare for the nights vote, "the rest of the team wants to vote off Cartman."

"Why the fuck would they want to vote me off?" Cartman asked in a frightened manner.

"You were the first one to drop out," Heather said angrily, "But unfortunately, we need you around so we can keep a tab on Izzy's alliance."

"So what should we do?" Caitlin said exasperatedly.

"Listen," Cartman said, "I will try to convince the others to vote off someone else, and if that doesn't work, I will always have plan B."

"What's plan B?" Mandy asked confusedly.

"Don't worry your pretty little head about that," Cartman said, "I will handle this."

Mandy then grabbed Cartman by the jacket, and punched him in the jaw. When the others looked at her in a shocked manner, she explained, "No one calls me pretty."

* * *

"So you see," Cartman said as innocently as possible to the members of team E-scope, " Frylock has just joined Heather's alliance, and I only dropped out so we could all get some rest, understand?"

…

"That is the biggest load of bullshit I have ever heard," Gwen said as she and the other members of the alliance walked away from the fat boy.

"Well looks like it is time for plan B," Cartman said, waiting for his turn to be called up to vote.

* * *

"Achoo!" Gwen sneezed as she huddled ion a blanket. Stupid obstacle course gave her a damn cold.

"Campers," Chris said as he walked up to the Gophers, who had just finished voting, "Only twenty-one of you will be receiving marshmallows tonight, the loser-

"-will have to immediately walk the dock of shame, take a ride on the boat of losers, and can never come back," everyone, even Lindsey, said in frustration.

"Fine spoil sports," Chris said angrily.

"The first marshmallows go to Gwen, Izzy, Heather, Bart, Jonesy, and Nikki."

They all caught their marshmallows.

"Owen, Stewie, Fry, Leela, Shake, Early, and Kenny also all receive marshmallows."

Owen caught his marshmallow in his mouth, while the others caught theirs normally.

"Caitlin, Leshawna, Mandy, Lindsey, Bojack, Meatwad, and Brian, you are all also safe."

Meatwad, like Owen before him, caught his marshmallow in his mouth. The campers turned their focus to Frylock and Cartman, both of whom seemed very confident.

"The final marshmallow goes to…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…Cartman."

"What the fuck!" Frylock shouted angrily. All of the campers, sans Cartman looked shocked. As Frylock was dragged away tooth and nail, many wondered how he could have been eliminated.

"How did you pull this off?" Heather asked Cartman, who was walking back to the camp.

"Plan B," he said simply.

* * *

 _(Two hours earlier)_

 **Cartman:** (Holding box in hand, and twirling a screwdriver) I am not going home until I win, so… (Suddenly opens the box, takes out the original votes, and switches them out for a new set of votes) Let's see if you can vote me off with plan B in place assholes.

* * *

Cartman silently smirks at the camera.

"Yes."

* * *

"You okay," Geoff said as he and Gwen sat on the dock looking out onto the lake.

"I'll be fine," Gwen sniffled, while rubbing her nose with a handkerchief. She then shivered. "Man it is cold out here."

Her face grew redder as Geoff swung his arm around her and hugged her.

"This better?" he asked teasingly. Geoff chuckled when she mumbled out a few words, unable to come up with a response.

Unbeknownst to them, many people were watching them.

"Isn't that sweet," Morty said as he Courage, D.J., and Bridgette stared at the rather different couple sitting on the dock.

"Sure is," D.J. said dreamily, before pulling Bridgette into a light hug, which she quickly returned.

"Well looks like we're the only ones without girlfriends," Morty sighed, "Huh Courage."

Courage wasn't so sure about that statement, as even though she had yet to show them, he had a good feeling that there was a girl out there that liked Morty, and it would be only a little while longer until she showed those feelings. But now was not the time to worry about that, he would rather just watch the young couples who were already had begun their relationships.

* * *

"Well that was a successful challenge," Chris said happily. He then heard a thumping noise, and turned to see Andrew, wearing a suit that had been torn to rags, glaring at him. Chris gulped as he saw that his plan had been foiled

"You son of a bitch," Andrew seethed, "You locked me in a cellar for nine freaking days. I have been living off rats and drain water for nine freaking days, and now you are about to pay for it."

"No!"

"That is right, say goodbye to nine days worth of pay!"

" **Why!"**

The campers all were treated to the sweet sounds of Chris suffering as they realized that their main benefactor was back.

* * *

 **Losers:** _Courtney, Zim, Noah, Eva, Sadie, Justin, Billy, Rusty, Trent, Cody, Beth, Wyatt, Katie, Homer, Ron, Frylock_

 **AN: Originally Brian was supposed to be the one voted off in this chapter, but I decided to keep him around a little longer. Hope you enjoyed anyway.**


	18. Chapter 18

Chris: Last time on Total Drama Island. The campers were put through a boot camp by our very own Chef. Duncan pushed the sergeant over the edge, and the rest of the camp got back at him by making Chef think he had stolen food from Chef's fridge. In the end, Jack would win the challenge for the Bass, and Cartman would switch the votes so it was Frylock who was leaving Camp Wawanakwa.

Will the Bass continue to be winners?

Will Andrew try to get back at me for locking him in a cellar for nine days?

And will Kenny ever live through an episode?

Find out now, on Total Drama Island!

* * *

 _(Cue Theme Song)_

* * *

"How could Frylock have been voted off?" Nikki asked herself, as the Gophers sat on their porch, trying to relax before the next challenge. All of them knew that Chris was in a bad mood, and would probably take it out of the campers.

"Hello campers!" they heard Chris shout. All of the competitors began to look around to see he was wearing a cheesy outfit that was covered in Q's. "Your challenge today is a blast from the past, the pop quiz."

The campers groaned, and Chris relished every second of it. "In this quiz, you will not be asked mere dates and numbers," Chris said, "But information about your fellow campers."

Many of the campers on both side suddenly looked at the host with looks of horror.

"That's right," Chris said as his smirk grew even more slyly, "Time to lay your dirty laundry out for all of your cast mates to see."

"Now if my assistant would please guide you to the podiums, we can get started," as Chris said this, Chef walked up to the campers and was wearing, you guessed it, a dress. As the campers screamed bloody murder, Chris suddenly pulled out a large number of collars. "These collars will give you a mild shock if you get the answer wrong."

"H-how bad is mild?" Morty asked fearfully. He knew better than to trust his health to the sadist.

Chris just ignored him as they walked to the stage, which had been set up to look like the set of Jeopardy. They began to here the famous music play, and saw Andrew sitting in the stand. The producer glared at the host, who was trying his best to ignore his boss.

* * *

 **Andrew:** Chris, not only do you lock me in a cellar for over a week, but you have the gall to ignore my orders about ripping off other shows. You will pay dearly for this. (Holds up remote) Let's see if the viewers will enjoy seeing your planning sessions.

* * *

"Now the first team to answer ten questions correctly wins immunity, and the person who answers the most questions wins the MVC," Chris said before grabbing a card. The campers were at a loss of who would represent their teams first. Finally, it was decided that it would be Stan going up for the Bass, and Jonesy for the Gophers.

"The first question is," Chris read the card, "What was Eric Cartman's greatest triumph?"

"Not getting voted off," Jonesy stated cautiously. He was answered by a bolt of electricity zapping through his body, knocking him over. Stan thought about it for a moment, and then realization dawned on him.

"Was it making Scott Tenorman eat his own parents?" Stan asked while pinching his nose. All of the campers stared at Cartman in disgust when they saw a point added to the Bass's score.

"You actually made a guy eat his parents?" Geoff asked in a fearful tone.

"That son of a bitch stole sixteen dollars from me," Cartman explained. Many realized it would not be wise to cross Cartman at that moment.

"Well," Chris said slowly, "That is kind of gross, so let's move on to the next question, Duncan, Lindsey, your up!"

Duncan smirked when he stood up to the podium. Lindsey just smiled stupidly as her teammates slapped their foreheads. Chris smirked as he saw their reactions.

"Your question is," Chris said as he read the next card, "what was Harold voted most likely to be in his middle school year book?"

"Biggest dork," Duncan said jokingly. He was then shocked by five hundred volts of Karma.

* * *

 **Harold:** Take that jerk wad!

* * *

"Who are we talking about?" Lindsey asked Chris, who sighed.

"Harold."

"Guy most likely to be in the movies?" she asked more than answered. The entire camp jaw dropped when the Gophers received another point.

* * *

 **Harold:** Isn't that cool.

 **Lindsey:** I could totally see him doing a Wellington TNT remake. That Henson, such a comedian.

* * *

"Guess I'm up," Geoff said as he walked up to the Bass's podium, and he saw that his opponent was Bart. Both of them were looking fairly confident.

"The question is," Chris read the next card, "Who starred in the very famous 90's sitcom Horsin' Around?"

Both Geoff and Bart blanked for a second, before a buzzer went off. "Bojack Horseman." Chris said, as both of the contestants left the stage much to Bojack's irritation.

* * *

 **Geoff:** how was I supposed to know that? I'm not even on his team!

 **Bojack:** Seriously?! That was like the easiest question in the entire challenge!

* * *

"Okay," Chris said as he prepared to give Bridgette and Caitlin their question, "Why did D.J. join Total Drama Island?"

"I know," Bridgette said happily, "He joined in order to help pay for his mom to go back to Jamaica." All of the girls cooed when they heard this reason, and D.J. could not help but blush. He would lightly high five Bridgette when she returned to the sideline, happy that she had known such an intimate fact about himself.

"I'll handle this," Mandy said as she stepped up to the stand.

"Guess I'm next," Jude said lazily, as he also stood on the stage.

"Who stole Eva's MP3 player back during the second challenge?" Chris asked the campers, and Mandy quickly answered.

"Heather."

"Correct," Chris said happily. Many of the Bass glared at the queen bee. Even if they did not like Eva, she did not deserve to be cheated out of the competition.

Gwen sighed as she and Courage walked up to the stage to answer their questions. Chris smiled slyly as he read the question. "What is Geoff's favorite song?"

"Summer Nights by Rascal Flats, duh," Gwen answered quickly before realizing her mistake. Many of the other campers looked shocked when they heard a ding from the host.

"How do you know that Gwen?" Leela asked apprehensively.

"We talked about music at one of the parties," Gwen quickly said, diverting the suspicion of many of her teammates.

* * *

 **Gwen:** Man, I dodged a bullet there.

 **Heather:** So close! Just a little more prodding and everyone would know she likes party boy.

 **Lindsey:** I think Gerald and Ginger would make an awesome couple. Just like me and Trevor.

* * *

"Which of our campers is famous for being a world champion limbo dancer?" Chris asked Heather and D.J.

"Grim!" D.J. shouted. He then explained to the rest of the campers, "In Jamaica, he is famous for winning a lot of tournaments." He and the lord of death high fived, while several of the others looked at them strangely.

Grim smirked as he walked up to the podium. He was rather confident, especially with his opponent being Izzy. There was no way he could lose to a girl that crazy.

"Which former Bass member is known at her school as the girl who thinks with her head?" Chris asked.

"Eva!" Izzy shouted, only to be shocked badly. Unlike the others, she actually laughed when she was shocked.

"Sadie," Grim said, then explained, "I got to collect all your souls eventually, I should probably at least know something about you." He unfortunately did not understand the strange looks that the other campers were giving him.

"So," Chris said, "To speed things up, I have decided to just ask the question to everybody at once, but don't worry; only those who answer wrong will be shocked."

* * *

 **Gwen:** Personally, I'm surprised that he didn't make all of us get shocked.

* * *

"The next question is, who does June have a crush on?" June blushed badly when she heard the question.

Kenny let out a muffled response, which no one could here, and was treated to a shock to the system. For some reason, the shock was so great, that it cooked the boy from the inside out.

"Whoops," Chris said as he walked up to Kenny to examine his collar, "Knew we should have checked the power on these things."

"Oh my god!" Stan shouted, "Chris Mclean killed Kenny!"

"That Bastard!" Kyle exclaimed.

"The next question is; what are Ezekiel's parents' occupations?" Izzy tapped her chin in thought, and then she beamed at the host as she rang the buzzer.

"Fruit farmers!" she exclaimed. Chris nodded as some of the campers gave her weird looks. "If you want to make a man yours, you got to know a lot about how to suck up to their parents." Ezekiel blushed a bright pink when he heard this.

* * *

 **Ezekiel:** That's kind of sweet. Incredibly creepy, but sweet.

* * *

"What is my most valuable possession?"

Kim sighed at the host's antics. "Your hair."

"Correct! Next question, who here has traveled to the future?" Many of the campers looked confused, before Heather slammed her buzzer.

"Bender obviously."

Many of the other campers seemed to understand her logic, and were shocked when Heather was, well, shocked.

"Bender is _from_ the future, and so is Leela, the guy you are looking for Jack."

* * *

 **Peter:** Man, this challenge is harder than when I tried to tame a giraffe.

* * *

 _(Cue Cutaway)_

 _Peter sighed as Lois ordered him to take the giraffe he had stolen back to the zoo._

" _Guess you have to go back to the zoo Alison Janie," Peter suddenly looked around and noticed the creature was nowhere to be seen, "Alison Janie?"_

 _Peter suddenly saw the giraffe running away from his next door neighbor's house, and then colliding with Cleveland's house._

" _What the hell?" Cleveland shouted from his bathtub. The bath suddenly began to tip towards the front of the house. "No, no, no, no!" The bathtub fell out off the floor and onto the ground, shattering it._

" _I got to stop taking my baths during Peter's shenanigans."_

 _(End Cutaway)_

* * *

Geoff would answer the next question correctly, earning a sixth point for the Bass. Many were not surprised when he correctly answered Captain Melon-head, to the person who ruins Eddy's scams at home.

Jude correctly answered what Jen's sister's name was, while Rick was able to correctly state who Lindsey was going out with. The blonde bombshell tried to apologize when the Asian girl revealed she had been meeting with Tyler when Heather wasn't looking.

As the questions began to grow harder, people had a harder time answering them. Harold and Owen were shocked when they both tried to answer, "Who is the strongest person here?" and no one could answer when a question about who is famous for writing the most universally bashed novel in circulation. No one noticed Brian giving a sigh of relief at that.

"Which camper knows how to speak eight languages?"

"Zeke!" Izzy shouted. Ezekiel shuddered when the red head blew him a kiss.

"How many times has Duncan attempted to escape from prison?"

"Twelve, me and Ron have stopped about half of them," Kim said as she smirked at the punk, who just waved her fist at her.

"Which camper has lead has lead his team too a conference championship as quarterback?"

"Geoff, we played each other in a game that season," Tyler stated. Geoff suddenly gave a once over of Tyler.

"Now I remember; you were that linebacker that dropped that interception."

"Shut up!"

"The Bass have nine points at the moment, while the Gophers are stuck at thirteen, so if the Bass get this next one right, they win immunity," Chris said, before adding, "Again!"

"Who has their own clothes modeling career outside of camp?"

"Justin!" Jonesy shouted before being shocked, before guessing again, "Lindsey?" He was zapped a second time.

"Stewie!" Peter shouted. The Bass cheered as they added the tenth and final point needed to their score, "Knew forcing my infant son to be a diaper model would have benefits one day."

"Well Gophers," Chris said as the Gophers sulked, "Bet you are feeling pretty crappy right now."

"Yeah, so," Gwen said angrily.

"So, I am here to offer one of you a way out," Chris said, "I a talking about a second challenge to decide who gets individual immunity." Many of the Gophers stared at the host angrily. Wasn't one challenge enough for this psycho!

"I felt that this challenge was too boring, so I decided to make a second one," Chris said, "And-"

"And I would like to show you a video of how Chris came up with this challenge," Andrew said while covering Chris's mouth. Andrew then took out a remote, and clicked a button causing a screen to appear. It suddenly turned on.

* * *

 _(On the Screen)_

"This challenge is too boring!" Chris shouted as he read the plans for the days challenge, "We need to come up with something else!"

"I thought that the shock collars were a good idea," Chef said angrily.

"Not that, the questions we have," Chris sighed, before stepping over to a wall, "Were going to have to come up with another idea. To the lab!" Chris then pointed at a panel of levers on the side of the wall.

"Pull the lever Chef!"

Chef pulled the letter, which suddenly caused a giant safe to land on the narcissistic host.

"Wrong lever!" Chris moaned from underneath the safe. Chef pulled the other lever, which caused the wall to spin. When they were spun, the two landed in a cart, and suddenly heard a voice.

"Please keep your hands and arms inside the vehicle, and keep your seat belts fastened at all times."

The two sadists took a trip down the coaster, finally hitting a stop, which flipped the two out of the cart, only now dressed in lab coats. They looked at each other, high-fived, and ran towards a table.

"This is perfect, perfect, perfect!" Chris said, as he plotted his plan, "Fist, well make the losers run up the cliff, then make them get on a helicopter, then send them all the way to Montreal, and then make them ride a bike all the way back to camp, first one back wins! Brilliant, brilliant, brilliant!"

Chef just stared at Chris, "Wouldn't that be a lot of extra time and money, when instead we could just make the stone wall we need, and we could use them as free labor?"

"That works too."

 _(End Video)_

* * *

Chris sighed as the campers howled in laughter. Seeing Chris being physically crushed was a sight for sore eyes.

"So," Chris said, 'Whoever builds the best six foot section of wall in five hours wins individual immunity, and will not go home."

The campers began to gather their supplies, and were placed on a remote area of camp just a few hundred yards away from the kitchen. As they were given to their positions, Heather faced her alliance.

"Start building my wall," Heather ordered Caitlin and Lindsey. Nikki and Jonesy both glared at the Asian girl, and walked up to her.

"You can't do that to our friend," Nikki growled.

"Oh yes I can," Heather scoffed, "she is in my alliance."

"Since when," Jonesy scowled.

"Since I made her," Heather said, "And I kindly ask you to leave my alliance alone."

"Yeah right," Nikki said, "Come on Caitlin, just go do your own wall."

"Okay," as Caitlin raced off, Heather glared at the three. They would pay for upending her alliance.

* * *

 _ **A few hours later...**_

"There, all finished," Nikki smiled at her handy work, as her entire section of wall was now complete. She smirked as she jumped up onto a tree branch, and began to rest. Just as she closed her eyes, however, she heard shouts and yells from off in the distance. She suddenly opened her eyes, to see a large group of Asian's on horseback riding towards her wall. She was shocked when they began to smash it down, and got up and ran to the walls.

"Get out of here you damn Mongolians!" she cursed, as the horseman retreated into the woods.

"Stupid Mongolians," Nikki muttered as she began to rebuild her wall, "why is it every time a Chinese person tries to make a wall, they always come to tear it down."

* * *

 **Chris:** And she is some how not surprised by this.

 **Nikki:** Hey, after a few weeks on this island, you get used to this kind of thing happening.

* * *

"Man, this is tough," Gwen groaned as she laid a foundation of mortar, "I now know why my mom makes me get good grades. I would hate to do this for the rest of my life."

As Gwen began to lay the stone, she was bending down, unable to see the presence behind her.

"Boo!"

"Ahhh!" Gwen screamed, only to sigh in relief when she saw it was only Geoff. "What do you want?" She asked tiredly.

"You look like you could use a hand," Geoff said as he got down next to her, "I am at your service."

"Geoff, you're on the other team, I can't ask you to do this," Gwen said sadly. Geoff just put his hand on her shoulder.

"Don't worry about it, I want to help."

As Geoff bent down to grab some more bricks, he was unable to see the bright pink flush that covered Gwen's face.

* * *

 **Gwen:** Geoff is the nicest guy on the planet! He is generous, kind, sweet, caring, helpful, hot… (Slaps forehead) I just said that out loud, didn't I?

 **Geoff:** (Wearing MVC medal) What can I say, I like Gwen. She is really nice and sweet. Plus she is a great competitor.

* * *

"There, that should do it," Nikki said as sweat poured from her body, "the wall is completely rebuilt now."

She suddenly heard shouting and metal clanging in the distance. She looked and saw a large area of armor on a hill, with sound emanating from it. She suddenly grabbed a large branch that was lying on the ground.

"I'll get you Mongolians!" she shouted as she ran to the hill. When she arrived, she was shocked that the only things there was some spare armor and a tape recorder that was playing the sound of the attack. When she turned it off, she heard the sound again, only this time coming from her wall.

"Damn Mongolians!" she shouted as she chased the barbarians away again.

"Stupid Mongolians," she muttered, as she began to build her wall back, AGAIN!

* * *

"Well," Chris said, as he examined the now finished walls, "You guys suck at manual labor."

The campers sighed at his insults. They had become used to it by now. As Chris began to inspect the walls, he suddenly came across Cartman, who was covered in his own blood and cement mix.

"What the hell happened to you!" Chris asked. Cartman then stared fearfully in a tree, seeing the Sloppy Joe Monster hiding in the branches. It appeared to growl at him, and then jumped back into the leaves.

"I fell down," Cartman lied.

"Um, you should be more careful," Stewie said.

* * *

"Not bad Nikki," Chris said. Nikki's wall was again standing, and was well made. Just as she sighed in relief, she heard swords clanging behind the wall. She turned to see the wall crumble, revealing the horde of Mongolians laughing. Nikki suddenly threw a brick at them.

"Damn Mongolians!" She exclaimed in frustration.

"Well," Chris said, completely unaffected by Nikki's plight, "Guess that means you lose. These walls have to be good enough to keep out anything, including Mongolians."

Nikki screamed in pure frustration.

"Okay, I have made my decision," Chris said, as he stood in front of the entire Gopher team, "I feel that Gwen has made the best wall of you all, and now has individual immunity." Gwen sighed as she sat down, full of relief.

"The rest of you will have to vote someone off tonight, so, see you at the pit in a few hours," Chris walked away, leaving the Gophers with a difficult choice, who to get rid of next.

* * *

"Man this sucks ass," Cartman said, as he sat with Mandy, Heather, and Lindsey, "We lost one of our alliance members."

"I say we get rid of either Nikki or Jonesy," Heather said.

"Yeah, but their both well liked," Lindsey said sadly, "How could we get rid of them if we can't convince the others to vote one of them off."

"Easy," Cartman said, holding up a small folder, "Blackmail."

* * *

"Hello Gwen," Cartman said as he walked up to the Goth, "I am sure you are…"

* * *

"…Trying to decide who you will vote off tonight."

"Yeah," Bojack said, "So?"

* * *

"I just felt you wouldn't want the others to see this," Cartman handed Stewie a picture, which caused the baby to scowl.

"So what do you want you douchebag?"

* * *

"Just for you to vote for Jonesy tonight," Cartman said sadistically, which eventually caused Fry to hand back the photo and nod his head in agreement.

* * *

 **Cartman:** Excellent!

* * *

"Well," Chris said, carrying out another plate of marshmallows, "You guys must be getting pretty sick of being here."

"Shut up Chris!" Gwen screamed.

"Touchy," Chris said fearfully, before grabbing the first marshmallow, "You know the marshmallow, you get no marshmallow, you leave, for good."

"The first Marshmallow goes to our individual star, Gwen!"

Gwen sighed as she caught her marshmallow and popped it in her mouth.

"Leela, Cartman, Kenny, Fry, Mandy and Lindsey!"

They all also caught their marshmallows.

"Owen, Izzy, Caitlin, Nikki, Brian, and Stewie."

Owen caught his in his mouth, while the others just caught theirs normally.

"Bojack, Bart, Leshawna, Shake, Meatwad, Early and that leaves us with just one marshmallow left."

Both Heather and Jonesy started to sweat. Heather glared at Cartman, hoping that his plan had worked.

"And the final marshmallow goes to…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…Heather!"

Heather smirked as she caught her marshmallow, as Jonesy sighed. Nikki suddenly ran up to her friend, gave him a hug goodbye, and with that the Hispanic boy walked onto the boat of losers, and left Total Drama Island.

* * *

 **Nikki:** I know Heather had something to do with Jonesy's elimination, and I will find out how.

 **Cartman:** Excellent, now with the others suspecting Heather of foul play, I can manipulate the votes as much as I want.

* * *

"So," Morty said as he bit down on their reward, a custom made burger with all their favorite toppings, "You guys ready for what happens in three challenges?"

"The merge," Geoff stated, "Kinda. Guess it will be one on one for the rest of the show from then on."

"Well," Bridgette said as she finished off her veggie burger, "Good night."

* * *

 **Losers:** _Courtney, Zim, Noah, Eva, Sadie, Justin, Billy, Rusty, Trent, Cody, Beth, Wyatt, Katie, Homer, Ron, Frylock, Jonesy_

 **AN:** **So y** **eah, Cartman has taken Heather's place as the main antagonist for the past few chapters, and Jack and Izzy haven't had a fight in a while. Don't worry, the rivalry will start back up again soon, and I hope you are all looking forward to the big merger, which I plan to be the first double chapter of the story. Thanks for reading, and I hope to get another chapter out really soon.**


	19. Chapter 19

Chris: Last time on Total Drama Island. The campers engaged in a battle of who's who in our cast list. We learned that Grim is a master limbo dancer; Stewie has his own line of diapers, back in the 90's, Bojack was in a very famous TV show, and even in this mild of an episode, Kenny still found a way to die.

The real action happened in part two, when the Gophers competed in individual immunity. While Jonesy talked back to Heather, Mongolians tore down Nikki's wall. Eventually, Gwen won immunity, with more than a little help from Geoff. In the end, Jonesy's comments cost him, and he was the next one to leave on the dock of shame.

Will Cartman continue to control the game?

Will Jack and Izzy's rivalry heat up again?

And will for the love of god, Kenny ever live through an episode?

Find out now, on Total Drama Island!

* * *

 _(Cue Theme song)_

* * *

"Congratulations campers," Chris said to them over the intercom, "I hope you are all proud, you have just managed to out last seventeen losers that were your cast-mates. Now get to the mess hall, were having a real fun challenge."

* * *

 **Andrew:** Chris really should look up the definition of fun in the dictionary.

* * *

"I hope (Snicker), your ready to (snicker) eat," Chris giggled. The campers just glared at their host.

"Just stop giggling, and tell us what we are doing for a challenge," Heather said irritably.

"Today's challenge is, The Brunch of Disgustingness," The campers blanked, "Your challenge, is a series of rounds, involving one meal. Each meal is so gross, that it makes Chef's food look gourmet. Each time you finish one meal, you move on. Fail to eat a meal, you are out. Last team with one of their members standing, wins invincibility."

"…Your mother never hugged you as a child, did she?" Morty asked sarcastically.

* * *

 **Bridgette:** Well, I guess we'll do okay. I mean I will eat anything once. Except meat, I can't eat meat.

* * *

"Your first meal is a delicacy made by our very own Chef Hatchet," Chris said as the campers sat at their tables.

"You got stomach pumps ready?" Geoff asked with his cheeks tinged green.

"The meal is," Chris said, pulling off the tablecloth that covered the plates, "bark shakes, made from bark, rotten milk, and just a few raw eggs."

Many of the campers just stared at the horrific concoctions sitting in front of them. Slowly, Ed brought his lips to the straw, and slurped it up.

"Yummy!" he exclaimed.

Slowly, the rest of the campers attempted to down the drink. Just as it appeared everyone passed, Nikki held her stomach, rushed out the door, and puked.

"Looks like Nikki is the first one out," Chris said sadistically, gleefully enjoying the girl's pain.

"Man," Geoff said with a sickly tone, "you're saying that even if we puke up this stuff, you'll eliminate us?"

"Yes," Chris said, ignoring the thud of Geoff's skull hitting the table. He then turned and waved to Chef, who was carrying another large platter of food.

"Your next dish is," the top was removed, "A toilet paper and fried onion surprise." The campers stared in horror at the toilet paper covered in greasy onions, though Chris had the courtesy to not use used toilet paper. As the campers attempted to chew the flaky, greasy paper, Chris turned to the camera.

"I love my job," he said happily.

"Oh, how I detest you Chris Mclean," Double D moaned, before he, Courage, and Ezekiel all purged, knocking them out of the contest.

"Wow you guys have weak stomachs."

Stan and Kyle both flipped the narcissist off.

"Your next dish is a blast from the past," Chris said, before revealing a bowl of meat balls, "Bull Testicles."

All of the males, even Grim, winced. "Why do you continue to do this to our bovine brothers, dude!" Geoff screamed.

"Because it's fun!" Chris laughed, before placing the balls in front of them.

The women, while kind of grossed out, were able to eat the meatballs with few problems. The men were not so strong. Owen and Ed were only eating at half their monster paces, Harold picked up a ball and squeezed it. D.J. just looked at the bowl, and a tear dropped down his face.

"It's the hardest thing a man can do," Chris said solemnly. Somehow, all of the campers made it through the round, and were preparing for the next challenge. The campers were beginning to look sick, and more than a few looked like they were ready to puke.

"Your next dish is an old favorite," Chris said, as Chef carried out a large platter from the kitchen, "Whose hungry for steak?" Many of the campers looked confused until he added, "From beaver."

* * *

 **Geoff:** I think they just picked some stuff off the side of the road and called it food.

 **Chef:** How did he know where I got my food?

* * *

"I can't do this," Bridgette moaned. She looked at the dead rodent lying in front of her. "I'm a vegetarian."

"Bridge," D.J. said, "Calm down," seeing that she was still not sure about eating the beaver, he added, "at least it won't attract any other animals onto the road where they could be killed."

Bridgette gave a small smile to the gentle giant before turning her head to the meal and slowly eating it. Geoff gave a thumb up to D.J., when the sound of gagging was heard. On the Gopher side, Stewie had lost his lunch, and soon afterward, Fry, Brian, and Caitlin also threw up.

* * *

 **Stan:** Man, this challenge is getting pretty intense; I don't want to know what's next.

 **Bridgette:** It was really nice of D.J. to do that for me.

 **Chef:** That boy is too soft. Even though it helped his team over all, I am going to have to increase my lessons for him.

* * *

The next two rounds were completed without any interruptions, though many realized that that the meals were only going to get tougher. Chris smiled sadistically as he prepared to announce the next dish.

"I am sure you guys all know that after dinner," Chris said, "Comes dessert! Your meal is ice cream made of rotten milk, crushed ants, and of course, ground up coach roaches!"

"Jesus Christ, dude!" Stan shouted, "Does your entire life revolve around torturing us?"

"Yes," Chris said with a smirk, "Yes it does."

The campers began to slide the frozen ball of disgustingness, and hardly any one seemed to enjoy it. As soon as it touched her lips, Lindsey had had enough and puked, as had Jen, Jude, Eddy, Morty, and Tyler.

The campers looked exhausted after eating all of the gross food, and Chris chuckled as he realized they would not last much longer.

"Our next dish is an exotic delicacy," Chris said, as the campers were shown their plates, "Porpoise wieners, hot dogs made from dolphins."

Bridgette gasped in terror. "But dolphins are our friends." She slowly pushed the poor dead sea mammal away from her, as the others sighed.

"I'm with you Bridgette," D.J. said as he pushed his meal away, "I am not eating a dolphin."

* * *

 **Bridgette:** That was the nicest, sweetest, kindest thing any one has ever done for me. D.J. is so sweet.

 **Chef:** That idiot really is costing us. I got to get him to stop trying to impress that girl.

* * *

After a few more rounds, the only campers left were Grim, Jack, Ed, Bender, Geoff and Harold for the Bass, and Kenny, Leshawna, Shake, Meatwad, and Owen for the Gophers. They all were holding their stomachs in pain, hoping the torture would soon be over.

"Wow," Chris said, "I'm really surprised, Izzy isn't here."

"Yeah," Owen said, "but for some reason, she wasn't able to eat those wonderful moth shakes."

The mere thought of those awful concoctions caused Geoff's stomach to grumble, and he raced outside, barfing noises clearly audible. The Bass glared at Owen, who they thought had been using psychological warfare.

I don't think he even knows what "psychological" means.

"Your next dish is a wonderful gunpowder cake," Chris said, as he cut a slice from each cake, placing it on each of their plates. The campers slowly began to pick at the cakes, while Kenny ate his whole. Unfortunately, he failed to notice a giant fuse coming from the cake, and was sticking out his mouth. The fuse was then lit by a spark from a lantern that had been in the middle of the table. Kenny screamed when he saw the lit fuse come towards his mouth.

BOOM!

"Oh my god," Stan shouted, "They killed Kenny!"

"You Bastards!" Kyle exclaimed.

* * *

 **Harold:** Man, that guy has worse luck than I do, and I have contracted over one hundred diseases in my lifetime. Course, I have been cured of most of them.

 **Stan:** Poor Kenny. The one thing he is going to be known for in life is getting killed a lot.

* * *

As Kenny's remains covered the room, the campers looked disgusted by the scattered remains of the boy. Slowly, all of the campers held their stomachs, and purged in a cannonade of sludge. The amount of puke that covered the room was so massive, it even covered Chris.

"Not cool!" Chris exclaimed in disgust.

"Its times like these that I'm glad I don't actually eat any thing," Grim commented, since he was the only one not covered in puke. Apparently, he didn't actually throw up.

"Amen, to that brother," Bender since he obviously didn't need to eat at all.

"Well," Chris said, "Since Grim and Bender didn't purge looks like the Bass win another challenge!"

The Bass cheered weakly, still to sore after throwing up the contents of their stomachs. The Gophers felt like throwing up again, and felt even worse when Chris flashed one of his evil smiles.

"Good thing for one of you losers, there is another secondary challenge, so clean up and meet me on the dock in ten minutes," he said, and the Gophers did do just that.

* * *

"So let me get this straight," Gwen said, "Our challenge is basically us trying to steal an envelope from one of Izzy, and if none of us are able to steal it within one hour, she wins immunity."

"Wow," Chris said, somehow looking up at the last paragraph, "Somehow, the author just managed to wipeout an entire page of dialog in one paragraph, he must really be tired of writing this chapter." A large rock came out of no where and hit him in the head.

"Nobody breaks the fourth wall on my watch!" Izzy shouted angrily, before huffing away, a folder tucked safely under her arm.

"How are we supposed to steal the envelope from her?" Leela pondered.

"Why should we bother," Heather said, "None of us were going to vote for her anyway."

As the queen bee left with her nose raised, Cartman suddenly ran up, flipped the bird at the girl, and rasberried her.

"Fuck you Heather! Fuckin' bitch!"

"Well," Gwen said sadly, "she does have a point, I guess we should plan who to go vote off."

As the girls and Bojack all walked away from the clearing, Cartman realized the only ones left standing around him were Fry, Brian, Stewie, Bart, Shake, Meatwad, Early, Owen and a revived Kenny. How he was back this early is really not that important, he was just back, okay!

"Well," Owen sighed, "I guess we'll never get that envelope."

"Screw that, dude," Cartman said confidently, "we're guys, we can out think her."

* * *

"Alright, here's the plan."

Cartman and the others were sitting in the Gopher bedroom, all looking at a sheet that had a map of the camp on it. Cartman suddenly pulled out a laser pointer.

"Izzy always tries to find scraps in the trash can at the back of the kitchen, so that is where we will make our move," Cartman said, while demonstrating it with the pointer, "Stewie will start banging some of the cans with a stick, and when she is distracted, Owen will run up, and kick her in the balls."

"Neeto!" Owen exclaimed, completely unaware of the mistakes in Cartman's understanding of anatomy.

"Once she falls to the ground in pain, Kenny will rush up and steal the envelope, it is so perfect, and it will really work," Cartman said while pointing at the title, "This is why the plan is known a " **Plan That Cannot Possibly Fail**."

I can think a few of the ways it can.

* * *

Izzy growled as she tore through a discarded ham, ripping the scraps from its flesh like a lion eats its kill. Suddenly she heard a noise, and saw Stewie banging a stick on a trashcan. She suddenly saw Owen rushing at her, yelling a war cry. He then stopped in front of her, and kicked her between the legs. Izzy glared at the heavy teen in front of her.

"What the heck's your problem butthole?" she asked rhetorically. Owen, a confused look crossing his face, he kicked her in the crotch again. She glared at Owen, before grabbing his arm and slamming him to the ground. Cartman stared at the scene in horror.

"Bail, bail!" he shouted in horror. As he and Kenny ran, Izzy threw Owen, and the tub of lard landed on Kenny, crushing him.

"Oh my God!" Brian shouted, "They killed Kenny!"

"You Bastards!" Stewie shouted.

* * *

"Well," Cartman said as he and the other Gophers sat down at the campfire ceremony, "even though we failed to get the envelope, we learned a lot," he then turned to the members of his team, "primarily that girls do not have balls."

Owen, whose arm was in a sling and had a black eye, agreed. "They sure don't," he said sadly.

"Well," Chris said as he walked into the campfire pit, "You guys really are perennial losers. But any way, time for the marshmallows."

* * *

 **Gwen:** Sorry, I like you, but you really didn't do well in the challenge.

 **Izzy:** How dare you kick me in the crotch. You really are up high on my list now Owen.

 **Heather:** Time to get back at you for ruining my alliance.

* * *

"The first marshmallow goes to, Izzy."

Izzy easily caught the gelatinous treat.

"Gwen, Leela, Kenny, Fry, and Cartman."

They all also caught their marshmallows.

"Heather, Lindsey, Stewie, Brian, Leshawna, Bart, and Caitlin."

They all also caught their marshmallows.

"Mandy, Bojack, Early, Meatwad, and Shake!"

Ed crushed the marshmallow she received, while Meatwad popped his into his mouth.

"Looks like it's down to you two," Chris said, as both Nikki and Owen looked around nervously at the other campers.

"And the last marshmallow goes to…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…Owen!"

"Wahoo!" The ton of fun shouted, catching the goody in his mouth.

"Sorry Nikki," Chris said, "Time for you to go."

Nikki hugged Caitlin, Leela, Gwen, and Leshawna good bye before mounting the boat of losers, and riding off into the sunset.

* * *

Geoff walked up to a blank screen, and looked around for a second, before picking up a card, and reading it.

"Due to the chapter being so small," Geoff read, "The new author for this story has decided to the very first Total Drama Omake section. What that means is anything that was deemed a funny idea, but was decided to be too stupid for the actual plot was stored in an idea tank, and will now be released in small scenes, each with labels to tell you when they happened. **_(AN: None of these actually happened in the story, and are just little tidbits I thought you would like)_**. The author says he hopes you enjoy them, and forgive him for what little development happened in this chapter. Thank you!"

* * *

 _[Omake one: First challenge, lost pants]_

Ron smiled when he saw Kim dive gracefully. He ran back a few steps, and then charged off the side of the cliff. Just as he reached outcropping that Ezekiel hit, he felt a familiar tug on his trunks, and then a slight breeze. He looked down, and sighed.

"I can't even escape this curse in Canada," he muttered.

* * *

 _[Omake two: second challenge, heart attack]_

Homer was racing with all of his might, trying to keep up with the others. He suddenly he felt a tug at his chest.

"Damn you heart attack!" Homer screamed, before falling to the ground, out cold.

* * *

 _[Omake three: fourth challenge, mud mummy]_

Double D pulled himself from the pool he felt the mud seep through the clothes he was wearing. As he walked with the rest of the campers, he felt it become harder and harder to move. He suddenly felt himself unable to even walk, the mud having hardened up around him.

"Curse this quick drying muck," Double D muttered through the near plaster like dirt.

* * *

[Omake four: sixth challenge, _web of evil_ ]

"Man, it is days like these that remind me why I'm Goth," Gwen muttered as all of the campers were caught in a giant spider web. They tried their best to ignore the screams of Kenny as he had his insides sucked out.

"Well, guess this is the end," Geoff moaned, "Gwen, in case we don't get out of this, I think you are really, really hot."

"Hey you jerk!" Trent shouted, "I like Gwen." He then punched Geoff in the head, which started a fight between the two teens.

"Wow, two guys fighting over me," Gwen said happily, "Never thought I'd see the day."

Just as the giant arachnid slid down the web, nearing Courage, the dog began to shake vigorously, until, he somehow transformed into a club. As he hummed charge, he smashed the eight legged devil into a gooey paste.

"Courage," Bridgette asked as they escaped the web, "why didn't you do that earlier against the other monsters we've seen?"

Courage simply shrugged, he had no idea himself. He usually just got caught and then escaped, that is how his life usually goes. Meanwhile, Gwen was starting to drool as Geoff and Trent continued to wrestle over her. Only now, they had ripped off each other's shirts.

"Best day ever," she muttered to herself as she giggled perversely.

* * *

 _[Omake five: seventh challenge, For…]_

"Okay guys!" Geoff shouted happily to his team, "lets win this one for honor, for our team, and most importantly, for Pizza!"

"For Pizza!" The Bass shouted as they charged into the maze.

* * *

 _[Omake six: tenth challenge, the loudmouth swallow]_

"Look, Joe, I think a deer is enough," Barry said hesitantly. They both then heard a squawking sound. They hid behind some bushes.

"I think that's the incredibly rare loud-mouth swallow," Joe said, before slowly sticking his rifle in the direction of the direction of the sound.

* * *

 _(In Playa de Losers)_

"…and that is why I should still be in the game!" Courtney explained for the umpteenth time, which caused the other losers to groan. They then heard a bang, and then, a small hole appeared where Courtney's heart had been, and the CIT fell to the ground, dead.

"Hallelujah, God shut her up!" Noah said as he raised his arms to the sky in thanks.

* * *

 _[Omake seven: twelfth challenge, Sex Ed.]_

"I can't believe we have to explain this to a teenager," Duncan groaned as he tied the rope tighter around Ezekiel, who was sitting in a chair.

"Why are you guys tying me up?" Ezekiel asked, "All I asked was why I felt funny when I saw Izzy's underwear."

"Zeke," Geoff said, "This is a precaution, this talk we are about to give you is really traumatic, and we don't know how you'll react." Geoff then sighed as he pulled out a book.

"The book we are about to read you is called, "Sexual Intercourse for Morons"."

* * *

 _(Three hours later)_

"Think he'll be okay?" D.J. asked as he pointed to an untied Ezekiel, who was sitting in a corner of the room in a fetal position.

"Don't worry," Harold assured him, "Same thing happened to me when I got the lecture. Just give him time and he will come around."

Ezekiel just sat in a corner mumbling to himself. Part of him told himself that the talk he had been given had been just a horrible nightmare. But the other part of him couldn't help but say one thing about a stunning realization.

"So that's what it's for."

* * *

 _[Omake eight, fourteenth challenge, Mad Skills]_

"Come on you stupid rodents," Harold muttered to Stewie and Brian as they charged at Harold, "Let's see if you can handle the power of the num-yo's."

In one quick movement, Harold sent both yoyo's into the Gopher's faces, knocking them out. Just as he pulled the ends back, one of the small round devices hit him in the crotch.

"I got hit in the num-yo's by a num-yo."

"Ha!" Stewie laughed.

* * *

 _[Omake nine, fifteenth challenge, Dynamite]_

"A-are you sure this will work?" Double D questioned fearfully.

"Sure," Duncan assured him, "I know a whole lot about explosives." He then pushed down on a lever, causing the dynamite around the safe to explode.

Boom!

Double D, completely charred, looked at the safe to see that it did not even have a dent. He turned and glared at the equally crisp Duncan, who shrugged.

"Oops."

* * *

 _[Omake ten: seventeenth challenge, you wrote a novel]_

The members of the Gophers all stared at the small, white dog in front of them.

"You wrote a novel?" Bart questioned.

"Yeah," Brian said, "But it didn't even sell one copy."

"Actually," Bojack said, pulling out one of his dozens of books, "I did buy it. It sucked, but I bought it."

"Well then," Leela asked herself, "who has written the worst book ever?"

* * *

 _(At Playa de Losers)_

"Darn it!" Courtney exclaimed, "How could my self-help book not have sold a single copy in five weeks!" She was shouting into a telephone, and all of the other losers sweat dropped.

* * *

 **Losers:** _Courtney, Zim, Noah, Eva, Sadie, Justin, Billy, Rusty, Trent, Cody, Beth, Wyatt, Katie, Homer, Ron, Frylock, Jonesy, Nikki_

 **AN: Sorry about the chapter, it was really boring to write, and I want to move on. Don't worry, I hope to get another one done soon, and I plan on it being better than this one. I hope these Omakes make up for the little plot that actually happened, and I hope you will read soon.**


	20. Chapter 20

Chris: Last time on Total Drama Island. The campers were forced to eat a series of increasingly disgusting foods. Eventually, Grim and Bender would win immunity for the Bass, and then, the Gophers were forced to undergo a second challenge for individual immunity. After a small adventure, involving Cartman and Owen learning that girls do not have testicles, Nikki was voted off for her poor performance at the eating challenge.

Can the Gophers finally win again?

Will Kenny ever live through an episode?

And why do I always ask you guys these questions?

Find out next, on Total Drama Island!

* * *

 _(Cue Theme Song)_

* * *

It was a normal night at camp Wawanakwa. The moon shined over the lake, owls hooted in the darkness, and Chris was plotting how to best torture the campers.

"None of these ideas will work," Chris said, with a five a clock shadow covering his face. He had been staying up all night trying to come up with an interesting challenge. He then turned to Chef, who was sleeping in a large chair. Chris flipped the chair, bringing Chef out of his slumber.

* * *

 **Chef:** Honestly, the main reason I am cheating is I want to get away from that asshole Chris Mclean.

* * *

"Chef!" Chris shouted, "We need to come up with ideas to make the campers lives miserable. And you're too busy sleeping to help me.

Chris than began to pace over to the wall, a smirk developing on his face. He then pointed at a lever on the wall, and Chef sighed as he got up.

"Pull the lever Chef!" Chris shouted.

Chef did pull the lever, and a giant Golden Chris Statue came down from the ceiling, crushing Chris.

"Wrong lever!"

* * *

 **Chef:** I love it when that happens.

* * *

Chef then pulled the other lever, causing the wall to spin in a fashion that swept the two sadists into a roller coaster. They smiled as the raced down the coaster, and high fived one another when they landed in lab coats at the bottom of the coaster.

Chris ran up to some filing cabinets, and began to recite his plan to Chef.

"First," Chris said, "well get a hundred crocodiles, and then some cut up logs. We'll have the campers log roll all the way across the lake, and then, the team with the most survivors will win invincibility." The host the cackled, "It's brilliant, brilliant, BRILLIANT!"

"Um," Chef said curtly, "couldn't we just do a cheap event that doesn't really involve any death that might lead to lawsuits?"

Chris sighed, before asking, "Baseball?"

"Baseball," answered a satisfied Chef.

* * *

The campers were woken up with a start, utterly confused at the song that was coming from the loud speakers. Chris suddenly drove up to the campers, decked out in a pinstripe outfit and baseball cap.

"For today's challenge," Chris said, getting off the ATV, "You will be playing America's national pastime, baseball!" Many of the campers cheered with relief. For once, the challenge was something sane. Tyler cheered particularly hard.

* * *

 **Tyler:** Yeah! Baseball! I can finally show off all of my mad skills.

 **Stan:** Goddamnit! I hate baseball. It's so damn boring.

* * *

The campers all filed onto a small baseball diamond at the back of the camp, now dressed in caps that displayed a fish of rodent, displaying which team they were playing for. Grim smirked as he stepped up to the mound to pitch, memories of his days in the little leagues of the underworld rushing through his head.

Owen stepped up to bat, smirking confidently, as he prepared to slam the ball out of the park. Grim nodded his head as the catcher, Harold, made a gesture with his left hand, signaling the type of pitch to use. Grim wound up his right arm, and released the ball. As the ball sped towards the plate, Owen swung with all of his might, only to miss the fire ball. Grim quickly threw two more pitches, striking the big guy out.

Owen screamed in anguish as he walked back to the bench. Stewie suddenly walked up to the plate, and Grim readjusted his pitches for Stewie's much smaller hitting box. Stewie was soon cursing profusely as he too was struck out.

Kenny silently got up to the plate, having secured his batting helmet to his head to avoid accident. Grim smirked as he wound up his most powerful pitch yet, and let it loose. It fit perfectly into Kenny's box, and became a strike. It had been moving so fast, it had actually been on fire.

Proof of the fact that the ball had been in flames was that now, Kenny was covered in flames from the pitch, and began to wave the bat around as he burned to death, giving himself two more strikes and striking him out. The entire Gopher pit was too shocked by Grim's mad pitching to care about the poor boy being burned alive.

* * *

 **Grim:** Who's bad! Who's bad!

* * *

Geoff smirked as he got up to home plate. Owen sweated as he tossed a pitch over the plate, which Geoff slammed to left field. As the ball rolled on the ground, Gwen picked it up and threw it to first base, but Geoff was already there.

Next up was Bridgette, who did not appear as confident as Geoff had been. After a few pitches, Owen managed to strike her out. The Gophers, while happy to see him strike someone out, realized that Owen was no Grim, and remained cautious.

D.J. smiled confidently as he stepped up to plate, confident in his strength. As Owen's first two pitches crossed the plate, he figured out the way the fat teen was throwing the ball. As the third ball was thrown, he hit it with all of his strength sending towards the wall. Just as it appeared that D.J. had hit a home run, Izzy, jumped up and made a fantastic catch.

Izzy then spotted Geoff trying to return to first, so she zipped the ball over to Lindsey, who was somehow able to catch it and get a double play.

The Bass sulked slightly, but were happy enough when Grim struck out three strait batters, sending them to the plate again. Heather scowled as she went back to right field.

* * *

 **Heather:** How can I be stuck on such a team of losers? They are all holding me back.

* * *

Grim smirked as he was walked to first. The Gophers had been too scared of his baseball skills to even try and strike him out. The Gophers paid for it when Jack hit a single that Grim used to get to third base. The next Bass player up was Kim, who hit a line drive up the middle, and Grim ran home. But, in the process, Izzy managed to tag Jack out, and kept Kim from getting to second.

As Morty stepped up to bat, Izzy called a huddle.

"Listen guys," she said with a demonic voice, "We can't allow these jerks any more points. Owen, I'll take over pitching."

Izzy smirked as she stepped up to the mound, and at the speed of light, sent three speeding fastballs past Morty, striking him out. The entire Bass team was stunned at Izzy's pitches, and the Gophers let out a cheer when they realized they were not out of the game yet.

Izzy quickly struck out Jen, and put the Gophers back to plate. Unfortunately, they were not able to do much with it, and were struck out in another three and out. And so the game would continue this way until the eighth inning. Both Pitchers retired each batter that came up, and the score remained 1-0 in favor of the Bass.

* * *

 **Harold:** This challenge really was a long and arduous one.

 **Fry:** We went through five strait innings of no hits.

 **Geoff:** I think that both teams really proved how tough they were today.

* * *

By the eight innings however, Grim was worn out, so the Bass were forced to have a meeting on who the relief pitcher was. The Bass were soon in an argument of a lifetime, and it was caused by one player.

"Let me pitch!" Tyler shouted frustrated. This was his chance to prove his prowess in sports.

"Sorry dude," Geoff admitted, "but you really haven't proven to be coordinated enough to win us a challenge with physical talent."

"I don't care," Tyler said, before adding, "Listen to me. If we lose, I'm not gonna care if I get voted off."

The Bass looked around at one another before nodding. "Alright Tyler," Grim said as he threw the ball to the jock, "your up."

Tyler silently took the mound, an aura of confidence across his face. As Bojack stepped up to the plate, he got ready to swing. Tyler, arm pulled back like a slingshot, pitched his first ball with lighting speed. Some how, the Horseman actually got a strike. Two more pitches ended in two more strikes, and the Bass cheered as by some grace of God, Tyler had actually struck a player out.

Tyler silently sweated as he saw Leela step up to the plate. He then threw his first pitch, and let out a sigh of relief when it also was a strike. He then threw four more pitches, and had two balls and two strikes, retiring Leela back to the dugout as well.

Tyler grinned happily as he realized he had just struck out to people on national television. Visions of glory began to enter his head, as well as inflate his ego.

It was unfortunate, that the next batter happened to be Izzy, who was blowing a piece of bubble gum, before she grabbed her bat and walked to the plate. The red head silently popped her piece of gum, and steeled her nerves for the first pitch. It flew right past her, ending in a strike.

The girl's eyes narrowed as she prepared to hit the next ball. Tyler, confident, sent the next ball strait down the center, where Izzy swung at it. She missed it however, and she had another strike. Izzy's face turned red in anger.

* * *

 **Geoff:** What happened next threw us all for a loop.

 **Peter:** Man that was crazier than that time that I met Ashton Kutcher.

* * *

 _(Cue Cutaway)_

 _Peter and Ashton were standing on the sidewalk next to each other. Peter waved to Ashton, who walked up to Peter. Peter then hit the celebrity on the head with a tomahawk._

" _He he he," Peter laughed, "You've just been tomahawked," Peter then explained, "that's the name of my new show, 'Tomahawked'."_

* * *

 _(End Cutaway)_

 **Cartman:** Man that was so hardcore. (Sloppy Joe monster jumps out from behind Cartman and ambushes the fat boy) Ah! Goddammit!

* * *

Tyler sent the next pitch down the plate towards Izzy, who, tried to lean in to hit the pitch more easily. This turned out to be a mistake, because when she leaned towards the pitch, her head was placed in the path of the ball, and she was knocked over. All of the campers gasped when they saw the poor girl lying on the ground.

After several minutes, Izzy finally came to.

"What happened?" she asked groggily. Chef checked her head, and eventually revealed she had a concussion and would be out for the rest of the game. Still, Chris said she had technically struck out, and the Bass were now up to bat.

The first member of the Bass who was up was Duncan, who looked confident. He smiled as he saw a sad Owen walk up to the mound. Owen couldn't believe that Izzy was out of the game, and threw a half hearted pitch to Duncan. Duncan, smirking, hit the ball with great force. As it sailed into right field, however, it landed in Gwen's glove, calling an out for the punk from Juvie.

The next batter up was Harold, who swung at the first pitch and had a strike. He then swung again at the second pitch, tipped it, and added another strike. Finally, on the third pitch, the lanky geek slammed the ball and sent it into the outfield. The ball hit the ground, before Mandy picked it up, and tossed it to second to keep Harold from getting a double.

* * *

 **Harold:** Gotta tell ya. I feel really good about my time on the island. I have an MVC award, proved I have mad skills, and best of all, I out do Duncan at almost everything. It's like a dream come true.

* * *

The next batter up was Geoff, who confidently walked up to the plate. Geoff smirked as he saw the first ball come straight, and he slammed it for a grounder. Eventually, Lindsey, who was at third base picked it up and kept Harold from getting to bases, but the Bass smirked as they saw they had two runners on the field.

Bridgette was nervous, and she was unfortunately struck out after fouling the ball a half a dozen times. D.J. patted her on the back, as he stepped up to the plate. D.J. steeled his nerves, before slamming the ball into the center of the field. Heather threw it back to Owen, but both Geoff and Grim had scored. Double D was unable to hit the pitches he was thrown, and the Gophers were up again.

Tyler was staring sadly at the ground as he walked up on the plate. He could not believe he had injured Izzy like that. He silently threw his first pitch to Caitlin, who chose not to swing at the ball that was so far off the plate. Tyler, who realized he had just thrown a ball, sent the next pitch up the middle, but it was traveling so slowly, that Caitlin was able to hit it for a single.

The next batter up for the Gophers was Gwen, who glared at the jock. Tyler fired off two pitches that both ended up as balls. Then, like he had with Caitlin, he threw the ball up the middle, and Gwen was also able to hit it for a single. The same would happen when Leshawna took the mound. Geoff sweated in frustration as he realized that Tyler was beginning to be psyched out.

Before Geoff could convince Tyler to leave the mound, Lindsey had stepped up to the plate, and was already in the process of trying to hit the ball. Unlike the others, however, she did not know not to swing at the balls that were not over the plate. So, on the first two balls he threw, she tried to hit them, and got two strikes. On the third pitch, which was right over the plate, she reached out because she thought the balls were going to be far away again. This caused her head and the ball to collide.

"No!" Tyler shouted in horror. He ran up to the blond, who was lying down on the ground. "Are you okay Lindsey?" he asked fearfully.

"Sure Todd," she answered slowly. Geoff sighed as Tyler began to cry when she heard that Lindsey was out. Tyler was done. He then turned to the rest of the Bass.

"Any one here able to pitch?" he asked. Duncan quickly shot up his hand.

"I lead the Juvie team to a state championship," he said proudly. Geoff sighed as he agreed to let the punk have a chance.

Duncan smirked when he saw the next batter was Mandy. He began to taunt the girl.

"Are you sure you won't need a stool? Shouldn't a sweet little girl like you be playing with dolls?"

As you can imagine, that really pissed Mandy off. She gritted her teeth like a legendary blockhead would instruct her to, and slammed the ball as it came over the plate. She hit it with such ferocity, that it flew over the heads of all the Bass members, and across the fence.

Standing of the other side of the fence was the bear. As the bear yawned, the ball came flying into its mouth, choking the poor creature. When the bear finally spit out the ball, it looked around the forest and grunted.

* * *

 **Bear:** Why does this stuff always happen to me?

* * *

The Gophers cheered as Mandy rounded the bases, having won the game for her team. Geoff glared at Duncan before pulling him off home plate. He quickly struck out Danny, who had desperately swung at all three pitches. Geoff sighed with relief when he saw that the next batter up was Heather.

Geoff threw the first pitch past Heather, who ignored them. He then threw two more pitches, both of with were ignored by the queen bee. As her teammates glared at her, the queen bee explained, "The next three batters up are Jen, Tyler, and Harold. They are hardly a hall of fame batting line up."

Owen stepped onto the mound, feeling the pressure to protect the lead. He threw the fist ball at Jen, who swung at it, getting a strike. His second pitch was far off the plate, earning her a ball. After four more pitches, Jen was walked by the big teen, and Tyler was next up.

Tyler, who was incredibly sad about what he did to Izzy and Lindsey, did not even try to hit the ball. Unfortunately for the Gophers, Owen was unable to keep the ball straight, and he too was eventually walked. Harold was also walked, and the entire Gopher team began to glare at Heather, who fidgeted under the glares. She was starting to rethink her decision from earlier.

Just as Duncan stepped up to the plate, the Gophers called another huddle, and the pitchers changed again, with this time Mandy taking Owen's place on the mound. As Shake took his new place at center field, Mandy threw two quick pitches that gave the punk two strikes.

As Mandy sent her last pitch up the middle, Duncan managed to pop it up into the air. Shake caught the ball in his mouth, before running to second, and then throwing it to third, getting a triple play to end the game.

The Gophers cheered as they held up the MVC, Mandy, and celebrated their comeback 4-3 victory.

Tyler sighed as Geoff threw his cap to the ground in frustration. Chris turned and grinned at the Bass. They cringed as he began to address them.

"Well," the host commented, "Looks like you guys are going to have another challenge, meet me on the dock of shame in half an hour."

* * *

"Now you might be wondering what you will be forced to do for this next challenge," Chris said as the Bass all stood in their bathing suits. "Well, you will be standing here, trying to last the longest under the force of several hundred gallons of water. Last one still on the dock wins."

Chef suddenly opened up the hose, and the water began to cascade onto their bodies. Courage, Stan, Kyle, Morty, and Double D, who were lighter than the others, were quickly pushed off the end of the dock.

After a few moments, Ezekiel began to slide. He was soon forced off the edge, and partially submerged in the lake.

D.J. noticed that Bridgette was beginning to slide across the deck, and he reached back to grab the girl. Unfortunately, this caused him to make a miss step, forcing him off the dock as well. He did not seem to care, because Bridgette was hugging him tightly for being so sweet.

Dib was soon also knocked off, and so was an exhausted Grim. Tyler and Duncan were trying their hardest, knowing that they were on the block this week.

Soon, Geoff, Ed, Eddy, Kim, Peter, Bender, Jen, Jude, Harold, Rick, and Jack were off of the dock, leaving only Tyler and Duncan. The two of them glared at one another, not budging an inch. Duncan saw that he might actually lose, so, he silently stuck his foot behind the jock's feet, and smirked when he saw Tyler fall backwards into the water.

Everyone on the Bass team glared at Duncan for his dirty trick. They had wanted to vote off the punk for his lousy performance. Chris turned to the team. "Meet me tonight at the campfire fishies," he said with more than a little malice. The campers all looked at Tyler, who sighed with frustration.

* * *

The Bass all sat on the stumps that surrounded the campfire, all looking sadly at Tyler, and likewise glaring at Duncan. Chris smirked as he walked into the clearing, carrying a plate of marshmallows that had only seventeen left.

"As you all know," the host said for the umpteenth time, "The camper here who does not receive a marshmallow will be asked to immediately walk down the dock of shame, take a ride on the boat of losers, and can never come back."

"Ever!" he shouted for emphasize. The campers sighed at the host's insistence on drama.

"The first marshmallow goes to Grim."

The exhausted skeleton weakly caught his marshmallow.

"Geoff, Double D, Ed, Eddy, Harold, D.J. and Bridgette."

They all also caught their marshmallows.

"Peter, Bender, Ezekiel, Courage, Stan, and Kyle."

They all also caught their marshmallows.

"Jack, Rick, Morty, Kim, Dib, Jude, and Jen."

They all also caught their marshmallows.

"And the final marshmallow goes to…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…Hey! Why do I have twenty-two votes for Duncan?"

"Guess we couldn't find anyone else who deserved to go," Geoff said with a sad smirk.

"Well," Chris said with a frown, "because Duncan is immune, only his vote against Tyler counts, so bye-bye Tyler."

Tyler gave them all a thumbs up as he walked to the dock. He then heard a feminine voice call her.

"I'll see you soon Tiger!" Lindsey shouted to her boyfriend. Tyler waved happily back to her, as the boat pulled away.

* * *

"Get ready viewers," Chris said as he appeared on the dock, "There is only one more episode left before the merge, and let me tell you, something big is going to go down. Also, send us some reviews that state any ideas for challenges for any future chapters. See ya Later!"

* * *

 **Losers:** _Courtney, Zim, Noah, Eva, Sadie, Justin, Billy, Rusty, Trent, Cody, Beth, Wyatt, Katie, Homer, Ron, Frylock, Jonesy, Nikki, Tyler_

 _ **AN: Yeah, Tyler is gone. But, at least he did a lot better than the last time he was in Total Drama Island. SO yeah, I made Duncan a jerk, but he is one as far as I am concerned, and should be treated as such. I hope you all have enjoyed the chapter, and are here to see my next chapter when it comes out.**_


	21. Chapter 21

Chris: Last time on Total Drama Island. The teams all went out to the ball park to play the great game of Baseball. Grim and Izzy dominated, and others stunk up the stands. Tyler stepped in when Grim got tired, and actually did pretty well. But, the Gophers led by Mandy managed a surprising comeback. In the follow up challenge, Duncan cheated his way to immunity, and poor Tyler was sent home.

Who will be the last camper eliminated before the merge?

Will I ever remove that dang extra lever?

And will Kenny ever actually make it through an episode alive?

Find out now, on Total Drama Island!

* * *

 _(Cue Theme Song)_

* * *

Geoff smiled softly as he rolled over in bed, dreaming about partying, eating meat, and talking with Gwen.

He slightly opened his eyes, and he saw an elephant in the middle of the room. He closed them again, smiling as he thought about seeing the elephant. After several seconds, his eyes opened in shock.

"Why the hell is there an elephant in the room!" he shouted, waking everybody up. A huge uproar occurred when the elephant itself was sent into a startled rampage, eventually knocking down the wall.

As the bass looked out the hole, they heard more screams and trumpeting, and saw four more elephants blast out of the other three cabin sections. The others, still dressed in their pajamas, came rushing out, and staring at the four pacaderms rampaging across the camp. Chris rode up to the campers, as they stared at him in shock.

"So," Chris said, "I guess you want to know why there were elephants in your rooms."

All the campers glared at the host, and even Kenny flipped him off. Chris simply smirked, and continued to talk about the challenge.

"Your task is to corral these mighty beasts in four holding pens across cam. The first four campers to successfully capture one of the elephants, wins immunity, and you are guaranteed a spot in the final thirty! The rest of you will vote off the final loser tonight."

"Wait a minute," Morty said, "so you're saying that tonight we all vote for one of the people who don't catch an elephant. Isn't that more or less saying that today is the first day that the first day that the teams have merged?"

"Yep," Chris said happily.

"Isn't that a little mean to the viewers?" Geoff asked.

"Who cares," Chris remarked, "I just ran out of ideas for two team challenges, and I thought this would be fun to watch. Now get out there, and be happy that the longest any of you will be forced to stay here is about five weeks."

The campers cheered when they realized how far they had come. They were nearly half way there.

Their celebration was cut short when one of the elephants ran by, and it crushed Kenny under its foot.

"Oh my god!" Stan screamed, "They killed Kenny!"

"You Bastards!" Kyle exclaimed in a fury.

* * *

 **Geoff:** Could someone please tell me how someone who dies every challenge actually made it this far.

* * *

As the elephants rampaged across the camp, the teams gathered together. They all had looks of anger across their faces, and more than a few were swearing at Chris under their breath.

"Guys," Geoff said, as he stood on a podium, "I know that this is the last challenge before the merge, but we really can't do this challenge and compete against one another. There is no way that one person can capture an elephants alone. Gophers are in particularly bad shape since Kenny can't help them." Many of the Gophers looked to the ground in shame.

"So what should we do?" Bart asked fearfully, as an elephant passed by, knocking over a tree in its charge. The entire group shivered. Chris really did need to get his sadism under control.

"I think we should all split up into groups, and then the one who does most for the capture of an elephant gets the reward for bringing it in," Harold said. All of the campers, even Duncan, agreed with the logic, and split up to take down the large beasts.

* * *

"Why the hell am I stuck with a baby, a dog, a fat guy, a hippie, a talking horse head, a dress wearing Asian, a black loser, and a Jew?" Cartman asked loudly, ticking off his competitors.

"Shut up you fat asshole!" Kyle screamed at the boy in the red vest.

"Shhh!" Jack whispered as he pointed to an elephant, which was quietly grazing on some grass. The members of the first group all began to tip-toe through the bushes, eyes locked on the huge mammal. As the creature's trunk moved downward to pick up wore grass, Cartman burst through the bushes, and walked right up to him.

"Listen here you stupid gray ass!" he shouted, as the others attempted to lure the idiot back to the bushes, "You need to follow me to the pen! You will come with me, and you will go in that pen, you understand you big piece of shit!"

The elephant just stared silently for a moment at the obese boy in front of it. After several seconds, the elephant picked Cartman up with its trunk, and flung him out of the way. The boy screamed as he flew threw the air, and the other members of his team sweat dropped when the heard him splash into the lake.

"So," Peter said, as he saw Cartman struggle to escape the lake, "Guess we need a new plan."

* * *

"You better help us, Heather," Leshawna said, as she Mandy, Izzy, Jen, Leela, Ezekiel, and Kim glared at the queen bee, who was filing her nails.

"Why should I risk my life when I know I won't be voted off?" Heather retorted spitefully. The other girls, and Zeke, sighed, as they looked out on the shore of the lake, where another elephant was getting a drink.

Izzy tapped her hand to her cheek for a second, as she pondered a plan. Suddenly, a light bulb appeared over her head, and she picked up a rope on the dock. She tied it into a lasso, and began to swing it around.

She then tossed the loop of the lasso onto a branch of a nearby tree. When the rope caught, she grabbed Ezekiel, and swung off the dock, and onto the elephant's back. The pacaderm trumpeted in surprise, as it began to run off along the beach.

Izzy yelled in glee, as the elephant galloped around the camp. Not only was this elephant trying to buck her off like that bull at that rodeo that she had been a star of when she was eight, but Zeke was holding onto her so tightly when they were riding. He must really like this.

Zeke was currently pondering taking the easy way out, falling off and being trampled to death by the elephant. At least then, death would be quick and semi-painless! He decided against it when they passed the pancake that had once been Kenny. Zeke suddenly held tighter to Izzy, trying to keep his balance.

"Getting a little frisky aren't we my Zeke?" Izzy asked slyly, causing Ezekiel to pale, "Maybe when were done here, you and me can get to second base."

Being flat mush was looking more attractive by the minute.

* * *

 **Ezekiel:** I am not sure how I should go through with my relationship with Izzy. She is very beautiful, and I want to be with her. But, I don't want to think about what kind of things she would want to do for a first date, let alone a honey moon.

 **Izzy:** first date? Hum, I guess a dinner, a movie, and then go alligator hunting in the sewer! Wahoo!

* * *

"Why the hell are we in Chris's office?" Stan asked, as he Harold, Double D, Ed, Eddy, Lindsey, Courage, and Dib watched Duncan tear threw the files, searching for something.

"If Chris got the elephants into our rooms," Duncan explained, "Than he probably has some bait or something we can use to get our elephant into the pen."

"Wow," Harold said with surprise, "You actually thought this scheme through."

Duncan glared at the nerd, before he saw a set of levers behind him. He the raised his finger to the air.

"Pull the lever Harold!" he shouted. Harold followed the order, and suddenly, a giant boulder fell on Duncan.

"The other lever, you douche bag!"

* * *

 **Harold:** I can see why Chef enjoys doing that. (Laughs)

* * *

Harold pulled the other lever, which swung the side of the wall, forcing the campers into the coaster, which sent them downward into the lab. They fell out of the car, all dressed in white lab coats. Harold raised his hand up for a high five, but Duncan punched him in the face.

They ran up to the lab's fridge, as Duncan explained his plan.

"First," the punk cackled, "we will get some of Chris's elephant bait, then we will plant me in the pen, and then, I will win the reward."

The others stared at him, looks of disbelief covering their faces. Suddenly, Harold gasped, as he realized the plate that contained the elephant bait. Duncan groaned when he saw that there was no bait left.

"What the heck are we going to use to get those creatures," Duncan asked sadly. Harold turned back to the fridge, and smiled as a new trap formed in his mind.

And like all great traps, it started with cheese.

* * *

Geoff was silently lurking through the branches, as he quietly inched above the back of the elephant that he had been assigned. On branches further up in the tree tops, Gwen, Rick, Morty, Grim, Bart, Fry, Jude, and Owen were waiting for his signal. He saw the elephant bend down, lightening its guard. Geoff smirked, and jumped from his branch.

"Geronimo!" he shouted, as he landed on the mammal's back, swinging his hat around like a rodeo star. Quickly, Gwen landed behind him on the back of the elephant, but the third camper to jump was Owen, and there was no way that the elephant was going to let our loveable bucket of lard.

The elephant was galloping across the camp, trying to buck the two campers off. Gwen fearfully gripped onto Geoff's shirt, trying to keep from the rampaging animal. Geoff smiled softly as the girl holding onto him was griping him tighter. Suddenly, the elephant that Ezekiel and Izzy were riding came up next to their elephant. Izzy waved to them, as Ezekiel held tighter to her, trying to keep himself from falling off.

"Looking good, Zeke dude!" Geoff shouted with a thumbs up, showing approval of his relationship with the insane girl. Zeke just turned to him and stared.

"Get me the hell off this thing, EH!" he screamed as the pacaderm he was riding on veered to the left, separating the bucking mammals.

* * *

Jack swiftly ran next to the elephant he was chasing, running along side the giant beast, rope in hand. He was quickly passing the elephant, which was running as fast as its giant frame would allow.

Jack suddenly jumped across the elephant's front, and tossed the hoop of the lasso on a tree. This caused the rope to straiten, causing the elephant to fall flat on its face, bringing it to a halt. Jack then grabbed the other rope on his shoulder, and hog tied the elephant's legs.

The other members of his team clapped as they walked up to the victorious samurai. Just as they were about to more the elephant, they heard a bellowing trumpet. They turned to see the elephant that Izzy was riding.

Now though, it was decked out in golden battle armor, and on top of it was Izzy wearing body armor covered in large green feathers. She let out a war cry as the elephant charged Jack.

"I will beat you Samurai Jack!" she screamed as she barreled towards Jack. Jack face palmed as he jumped into the tree. He was really enjoying his respite from the insane girl.

As Izzy raced past the other members of Jack group, the noticed something tied to the back of the creature. There, tied to the elephant in a slave girl outfit, was Ezekiel.

"Get this insane girl away from me!" he screamed in anguish as the elephant chased the wayward samurai across the island.

"Man, he is so whipped," Peter chuckled, as the members of the group began to roll the elephant towards the pen.

* * *

"This is so stupid!" Duncan muttered, as Harold set down the plate of cheese in the pen. The nerd turned back to the jail bird and angrily glared at him.

"It will work," he said, "trust me, everything loves cheese."

"That is so…" Duncan began, before suddenly, in less than an instant, the elephant they had been assigned was standing in the holding pen, eating the cheese. Harold just turned and smirked at the shocked punk.

"Told ya."

* * *

Jack cringed as he jumped from a tree as it crashed to the ground. The elephant that Izzy was using to chase him was proving to be an asset, as it was able to knock any tree he tried to escape on down. If he did not come up with a plan soon, Izzy would actually manage to beat him. And he was not going to let that happen.

Jack suddenly saw the elephant stop for a second to try to eat a small branch. Izzy forced the elephant to continue its rampage, and a plan formed in Jack's mind. He sliced off a branch from a nearby tree, and suddenly began to bait the creature into following him. Izzy, too preoccupied in following him, did not notice.

Jack smiled softly as he saw the pen, and he also saw that all of the other pens were already full. They were all standing in front of the pens, and all of them began to watch in awe as Jack tossed the branch into the pen, causing the elephant to run towards the pen.

"Close the gate, close the gate," Izzy barked, trying to keep the elephant from entering the gate.

Stewie, rather foolishly, tried to follow the order. Just as he was about to shut the gate, however, the elephant had already reached him. The elephant crushed him under its heavy foot, shocking everyone as the elephant was locked in its pen.

"Oh my God!" Stan shouted in true shock, "They killed Stewie!"

"You Bastards!" Kyle exclaimed to the heavens.

* * *

 _(Meanwhile, in Comedy Central studios)_

Trey Parker sneezed loudly as dropped hot coffee on his lap. He also heard his best friend Matt Stone scream in anguish, and heard the something about a stapler going through his hand.

He sighed, "They must really hate us this time. But, I haven't even done anything to Kenny yet. Must be one of those goddamn fanfiction writers again."

The man sighed as he began to look at the New York Times. Must be something in there to make a funny episode out of.

* * *

 _(Back at Camp Wawanakwa)_

Chris drove up in his ATV, smirking as he saw the exhausted expression of the campers. He looked and frowned when he saw the elephants. This challenge was supposed to be one of the hardest ones he had ever imagined, he couldn't believe that they managed to work together like they had. Oh well, the follow up could be just as fun to watch.

"Congratulations to Izzy, Jack, Harold and Geoff for getting the first four immunity places," Chris said reluctantly. While some of the campers cheered, Gwen suddenly realized something.

"What do you mean first spots?" she asked, only to cringe when Chris showed her one of his incredibly evil smiles.

"I see you are still as observant as ever Gwen," Chris said happily, "I hope you are ready for the second challenge."

All of the campers groaned when they heard this, they had hoped they would be done for the day. Chris silently laughed as they wailed. He really loved this job.

"So," Chris said, as the campers refocused their attention back to him, "The next challenge is going to be a real hard one, in it, you will have to do something so mind blowing and annoying, as well as difficult, that you can not possibly accomplish it. Your task will involve a past camper, and an annoying one at that."

* * *

The campers walked into the dining hall, and were shocked to see a tan girl in a gray sweater vest sitting at on a podium, across from another identical one, and microphone sticking out in front of her.

"Hello competition," Courtney said slyly, as the others stared angrily at her.

"Your challenge is to make as much noise as possible, using your voice only. The first one to be louder than Ms. Windbag here wins immunity. And, it is my," Chris said, before leaning down to read from a card, "honor," he then stood up again, "to announce that if Courtney beats you all in a noise contest, she will be allowed back in the game, and two of you will be voted off tonight."

The campers all had looks of shock cross their face. They could not believe the unfairness. Gwen grabbed Chris by the collar.

"How could you be so unfair to let her back in the game?" she asked angrily, "She was voted off fair and square in the first challenge."

"My lawyer and I happened to disagree," Courtney said, before turning an angry glance to Geoff, "Don't worry, I will deal with you soon enough traitor."

"You cost us that challenge, you deserved to be voted off!" Geoff shouted angrily. He then turned back to Chris, "You hate her as much as we do, why would you let her come back?"

"She sued the show for wrongful cancellation of competition," Chris explained sadly. Everyone looked confused.

"Okay, I'm no law student," Bridgette said, "but if she was eliminated within the rules of the game, doesn't that mean she was taken out legally?"

Chris nodded his head, and sighed, before explaining, "She hired Johnnie Cochran to sue us."

* * *

 _(At the courthouse three days ago)_

"This case is in the bag," Andrew said, putting his hands behind his head in satisfaction, "We've shown all the evidence, everything shows that we are right. Not even Johnnie Cochran can save her case now."

"Mr. Cochran," the judge, overlooking the crowd, addressed the African American lawyer, "You may make your closing argument."

"Ladies and gentlemen of the supposed jury," the lawyer began, "The show's attorney," he motioned to Chef Hatchet, who was wearing a suit and tie, "would like to make a good case. Hell, I even felt some pity my self for them. But ladies and gentlemen of the supposed jury, I have one final thing I want you to consider. Ladies and gentlemen," he suddenly flipped over a large piece of paper that was covering a poster, "this is Chewbacca. Chewbacca is a Wookiee from the planet Kashyyyk. But Chewbacca lives on the planet Endor. Now think about it; that does not make sense!

"Damn it!" Chef cursed, "He's using the Chewbacca defense!"

"Why would a Wookiee, an eight-foot tall Wookiee, want to live on Endor, with a bunch of two-foot tall Ewoks?" Cochran continued, the jury looking more confused he word he spoke," That does not make sense! But more important, you have to ask yourself: What does this have to do with this case? Nothing. Ladies and gentlemen, it has nothing to do with this case! It does not make sense! Look at me. I'm a lawyer defending a major record company, and I'm talkin' about Chewbacca! Does that make sense? Ladies and gentlemen, I am not making any sense! None of this makes sense! And so you have to remember, when you're in that jury room deliberatin' and conjugatin' the Emancipation Proclamation," he approached the jury and softened his voice, "does it make sense? No! Ladies and gentlemen of this supposed jury, it does not make sense! If Chewbacca lives on Endor, you must acquit! The defense rests.

One of the jury member's head exploded, and Andrew slammed his head on the table. How could they have lost this case! He moaned as Courtney screeched in victory. Damn idiot Canadians!

* * *

 _(Back at Camp Wawanakwa)_

"So Andrew is trying to cut his losses, which is why he hasn't been around for a while," Chris murmured, "so, beat her down to show her that she should not be on this show!"

The campers cheered. For once, they were on the same side as Chris.

Leshawna stepped up to the podium, a look of confidence pouring out from her. "Don't worry ya'll," she said, "I'll take this little white girl down, and show her who the real blowhard of the camp is." She then thought about what she said. "Ignore that last part."

Just as Leshawna was about to talk into the microphone, Courtney began to speak in a loud voice, without ever stopping to take a breath.

"Lifeissounfair,allIwantistowin,,whenIgetmyhandson-" she continued to rattle off, as Leshawna was blown back from the pure force of Courtney's tirade. The other campers looked in shock as Leshawna was helped up from the wall.

"This might be harder than I thought," Chris commented, while Courtney drank from a cup of water.

* * *

 **Geoff:** Nobody even lasted twenty seconds with her. Even Cartman, Bender, and Heather were no match.

 **Gwen:** She didn't have to call me an Emo. There is a difference between Goths and Emos.

 **Chris:** I was really worried that she might actually get back on the show, but I should have known that at least one camper has a very powerful set of lungs.

* * *

Courage was the last one left. The little pink dog was the focus of all of the campers' attention. Courtney smirked. There was no way she could lose now. Unfortunately, she had forgotten to look at the dodge ball episode, otherwise, she might have seen what happened next coming.

Just as Courtney began her long tirade, again, Courage held his ears. He was whining and yelping, begging for the pain to stop. How was he supposed to out talk Courtney? But then he remembered, he didn't have to out talk her he just had to out noise her. He then began to gather up all the air he could into his lungs. Just when it looked like Courtney would win, Courage let the air loose in a great scream.

"AAAAAAHHHH!" this scream was so great, that it not only shut the annoying girl up, but also sent him flying out the window, and into the sky.

* * *

Noah was enjoying the nice quiet surroundings at the resort at where he was staying. Sure, the anti-me was being as annoying as ever, and Katie and Sadie wouldn't shut up, but overall, it was quiet and more than enough time to finish his Othello. Suddenly, he heard screaming. He turned and sighed when he saw Courtney plummeting towards him. He glared at the hole in the ground that she created when she crashed into the Earth.

"So much for peace and quiet," the book worm sighed, as he prepared for the CIT's unnecessary diatribe about how unfair her life was.

* * *

The campers all cheered as Courage was given the last spot of immunity, and an MVC award to boot. Chris, while glad to be rid of Courtney, he still did not like to see the other campers happy.

"Okay, that's enough," Chris sneered, causing all the campers to stop talking, "I would like to congratulate Geoff, Courage, Izzy, Jack and Harold on getting individual immunity. Everyone besides them is up for the vote tonight, so make a wise choice for who is the last one not allowed into the individual competition."

* * *

The campers were all sitting in the dining room, contemplating who they would vote off. Many of the campers were glaring at some of the more unpopular campers, particularly Heather and Duncan. Cartman noticed this, and quickly grabbed Lindsey and Mandy, and brought them over to sit next to the hated pair.

"What the heck are we supposed to do?" Duncan asked angrily, trying to ignore the glare of Harold.

Heather just stuck her nose into the air. "I don't see why I have to worry, if they look at who play the game best, they would obviously pick me."

While her allies glared at her, Cartman smirked to himself. She had no idea who was really in charge of this game. He then pushed himself from his delusions, and addressed the campers seated near him.

"Listen, you all might want to get rid of these sad shitty excuses of campers," he motioned to Heather and Duncan, who glared at him, "but, if you have seen Survivor, you all know that the winner is chosen by popular vote, so wouldn't be a good idea to keep them until the end."

Several campers, such as Peter, Owen, Rick, Bojack, and Grim, began to ponder this over. Then Bart raised his hand up, and asked, "Then who should we vote for?"

"Obviously the camper that is most physically gifted," Cartman said, "and considering the fact that Geoff, Izzy and Jack have all been voted off, I would have to give the honor to Kim."

Kim looked shocked when she heard this. Many of the campers around her also gained looks of shock.

"But," Bridgette stuttered, "She is Kim Possible, the girl who can do anything!"

"Exactly why we should vote her off, she is too good to be allowed any chance in individual challenges," when several of the other campers began to ponder Cartman's suggestion, Duncan and Heather knew they had a chance.

* * *

 **Heather:** Got to say, that fat little boy did some excellent strategy out there.

 **Kyle:** You fat son of a bitch! I don't care if we can't compete with Kim physically, Me, Stan and Kenny are still gonna vote for you!

 **Gwen:** I am voting for Heather, she has been after me from day one, and I can't stand her!

 **Harold:** I can't wait to wave goodbye to that punk Duncan. He has demeaned me since we met, and I hope I last long enough to see him cry as he rides on that boat away from this camp.

* * *

All the campers were sitting at the bonfire, along with the recently revived Stewie and Kenny. Stewie turned to his fellow journeyman to the other side.

"You know," Stewie said, "Once you get used to the whole being dead thing, you really that really wasn't that bad of an experience."

Kenny angrily flipped the baby off, and gave out a muffled, "Muck moo."

"Hey campers," Chris said as he walked up to the fire pit, "Sorry, but the elephants got into the pantry, and ate all of our marshmallows," Owen screamed in horror, "So I will just call out your name, to tell you if you are safe tonight."

"First are Geoff, Jack, Izzy, Harold, and Courage."

They all smiled when they heard their names called.

"Next are Gwen, Leshawna, D.J., Bridgette, Rick, Morty, and Double D."

They all also smiled when they heard their names.

"Ed, Eddy, Jude, Jen, Bender, Dib, Shake, Meatwad, and Grim"

They all had the same reaction as those before them.

"Kenny, Early, Stewie, Peter, Brian, Bojack, and Lindsey."

Same reaction…again.

"Stan, Kyle, Owen, Ezekiel, Fry, Leela, Bart, Mandy, and Caitlin."

Owen moaned about the loss of his beloved marshmallow, and suddenly, there was only four campers left, Kim, Cartman, Heather, and Duncan.

"All of you received votes tonight, and the one with the least amount is…Cartman!"

Cartman shouted in victory, as Kim, and the other boys from South Park sighed. The three remaining campers that had yet to have their names called.

"The second to last member to join the final forty is…Duncan!"

Sweat began to pour down Kim and Heather. They all felt the pressure of being voted off after all of their hard work.

"And the last camper to be allowed past the merge is…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…Heather!"

Heather sighed, as Kim hung her head in anger and frustration. As she got up to leave, Bridgette, caught her, and gave her a hug goodbye.

Kim waved back, as she began to fade into the distance on the boat. Geoff, Gwen, Bridgette, D.J., Morty, Double D, and all the other campers all waved goodbye to her.

It was only when they returned to their cabins that they realized something. The merge had occurred, now it was every man, woman, child, robot, horse, and dogs for themselves.

* * *

It was early the next morning, and the campers were waiting for breakfast. As they sat their, D.J. attempted to console Bridgette, who was really upset about seeing Kim gone. He knew she was feeling a lot of pain, and attempted to console her. Just then the door of the dining hall was slammed open.

But instead of Chris or Andrew, the person in the door was an older African American woman with a pink sun hat and sweet smile on her face. While many of the campers looked confused, D.J. gasped in a stunned tone.

"Mama!"

* * *

 **Losers:** Courtney, Zim, Noah, Eva, Sadie, Justin, Billy, Rusty, Trent, Cody, Beth, Wyatt, Katie, Homer, Ron, Frylock, Jonesy, Nikki, Tyler, Kim

 _ **AN: Yes, the merge has finally happened, no more teams! That does not mean that campers will not work together, only that there is no rigid team system like before. I am sorry to all Kim fans, I just couldn't find much of a story to her, so she had to go. Now, I hope you like my little cliff hanger, and are excited about the next chapter. Any ways, read and review, and tell me if you like the chapter. See ya!**_


	22. Chapter 22

Chris: Last time on Total Drama Island. The teams were unofficially dissolved, in order to allow an elephant hunt to occur. Not surprisingly, Kenny was killed in the outset, and Jack, Geoff, Harold, and Izzy won immunity. Then, in the follow up challenge, Courtney was back and vying for a position in the final thirty. It took Courage's incredible lungs to send her packing. In the end, it was Kim who was forced to board the boat of losers, and the final thirty were decided.

Why is D.J.'s mom in camp?

Who will be the first member of the final thirty voted off?

And will Kenny ever get through an episode alive?

Find out now, on Total Drama Island?

* * *

(Cue theme song)

* * *

"Mama!" D.J. shouted in surprise, as his mama smiled when she saw him.

"Well there is my poppy doo," She said, as the big linebacker ran up to his mother, and gave her a hug. He even ignored the snickers of the other campers, and Cartman was bellowing haughtily as he laughed at D.J.'s nickname. Even Bridgette was having a hard time not snickering, but she stopped when she heard a very familiar voice.

"There's my little surfer girl," a blond woman, who liked more or less like an older version of Bridgette, said as she stepped through the door. Bridgette jumped from her seat as she ran up to greet her.

"It is so good to see you mom," she said softly as she cried. Her mother held the blond in her arms, smiling as she patted Bridgette on the head.

"Well isn't this a sweet scene," Chris said with obvious disdain in his voice. He then turned to the other campers, "We'll since these two, "he motioned to the mothers who had just arrived, "decided to show up early, I guess I can reveal what today's challenge is. It is one big natural obstacle course with one of your dearest loved ones."

When many of the campers looked shocked, Chris came closer to them. "That's right, we found through a complex survey and your own admission the closest people to you, and brought them here. If your favorite person could not come, then we found the next best choice."

The campers all filed out excitedly, wondering who had been chosen.

* * *

A young boy with a baseball cap ran up to Gwen, hugging her when he reached her. "Hey little bro," Gwen said fondly. Geoff smiled at the girl, until a big hand grabbed him by his shoulder.

"Yo man!" a man with red hair, muscles, and a six foot frame to boot shouted to Geoff, "Coach been getting angry with you not being there bro!"

"Parker my man!" Geoff shouted happily, hugging his big lineman buddy. This scene was very sweet, but there are more to see, so let's get cracking.

"Hello my love," A black boy with glasses said shakily as he kissed Mandy's hand. Of all the people to send, why did it have to be Irwin!

She glared when she saw Grim, who was standing happily next to his father, freaking out several of the other competitors. They all found it more than a little weird that Death himself could have a father.

Rick groaned internally when he found out that his son in law and also Morty's father, Jerry was going to be his partner while Morty's partner was his older sister Summer. Oh how Rick wanted to murder Chris right now.

Jude was sitting next to an older man in a security uniform, while Jen was talking to another young woman. Jen was groaning when her sister began to chastise her again, wishing that lightning would strike her down. Caitlin was talking with a blonde girl, who she was apparently on mildly good terms with.

Duncan's parole officer was glaring at Duncan. Apparently, no one besides him was allowed to come to this challenge for legal reasons. Duncan cringed under the glare, hoping that he could somehow get out of there.

Heather was standing next to her mother, who looked more or less like an older copy of Heather, except for the fact that her hair was in a bun. She seemed to be mildly nicer than her daughter, a kind smile covering her face.

Lindsey was hugging an older man, who was wearing a Kashmir sweater. "Daddy," Lindsey said happily, "It is so good to see you!"

Leshawna was standing nest to her cousin, who seemed just as loud and proud as the resident ghetto rapster. They were both talking about clothes and several other subjects that no one really cares about. (HEY!- Leshawna)

Harold was talking with one of his RPG buddies, and Ezekiel was trying to listen to an older man, with gray peach fuzz covering his chin. Bart was talking with a young girl with blond spiky hair and a red dress that appeared to be his sister. Much to his annoyance.

"Hey Lois," Peter said happily, hugging a red headed woman. The woman sighed for a second.

"Peter," she admitted, "I'm not here to be your teammate."

"What!"

"I'm here for Stewie," Lois explained, which caused both Stewie and Peter's jaws to drop.

"How in the name of all of hell did I end up with Lois being my partner?" Stewie asked the world angrily.

"Then who did come to be my partner?" Peter asked sadly. He was answered when a man in a wheel chair rolled up to him. "Aw come on! JOE!"

"I take offense to that."

Brian wasn't too happy about who was his partner either as it was none other than Glenn Quagmire who flat out hated the dog's guts.

Dib was soon finding himself propelled into the air by a punch from Gaz. He did not know how his little sister got talked into coming to camp, all he knew was that he did not like it one bit. Owen was chugging a bottle of soda that his big brother had brought. And, I really do mean big brother.

"Hello Bojack!" an anthropomorphic Labrador retriever in a grey V-neck shirt and aviator sunglasses, usually propped up on his head, with light blue pants with white lines going down the sides, orange sneakers, and two wristbands, a brown one and a neon green one, on his left wrist shouted excitedly, Bojack frowned and slapped his forehead. Why the hell did Chris have to bring Mr. Peanutbutter of all people here?

"Hey! Where is Izzy's family! Or Jack's and !" Izzy shouted anxiously. Chris sighed as he pinched the bridge of his nose together.

"We don't know who Jack has for a family," Chris explained, before continuing, "And all of your family is in the insane asylum."

"You would think that," Izzy said coyly, a sly look covering her face, "you would think that."

* * *

 _(Meanwhile, at the Canadian asylum for the insane)_

"It is so nice to be out of that jacket," a tall red headed woman said with satisfaction, stretching slightly, "we must thank Izzy for sending us that cake with that hidden nail file."

"Right you are," said a red haired man, "but first, let us burn this place to the ground and to make sure they never attempt to lock us up again."

The insane couple began to dance around, hopping all over the place with incoherent glee. The next morning, nothing was left of the building, or the members of the RCMP who had been guarding it.

* * *

 _(At the camp)_

"So that means," Chris continued, "that both Jack and Izzy are unable to compete in the challenge, so they both have immunity in tonight's vote," most of the campers groaned," however, they will not be able to receive the fabulous reward."

* * *

 **Andrew:** I really wanted to make Izzy and Jack work as a team. Unfortunately, even Chris admitted that was just a little to inhumane to Jack.

 **Izzy:** (dancing) Boom sha ka la ka, boom sha ka la ka , boom!

 **Andrew:** (Pointing with his finger at the previous image) see what I mean?

 **Izzy:** (Arm reaching across the TV monitor to grab Andrew by the throat) How dare you insult me!

 **Andrew:** (While being pulled back into Izzy's scene) Oh dear.

* * *

Courage was looking around for his loving owner, Muriel. He could not believe that she was not here yet. Suddenly, someone tapped him on the shoulder. He turned excitedly, only to realize that it was not his owner at all. Instead, he saw Shirley the medium, a small green chuwawa.

Courage let out a scream when he saw Shirley; she had already caused his family a lot of headaches before. "I was chosen to be your partner," she said with her usual cynical draw. Courage scratched his head, before mumbling out a question. Shirley looked around fearfully, before saying, "the wife of the stupid one is not able to come to the show, even though I am sure she would want to."

Courage nodded his head in understanding, ignoring the sorrowful look of Shirley. The chuwawa sighed to her self. She knew she would have to explain the circumstances to Courage sooner or later. She did not like being the bearer of bad news, it was one of the reasons she hated her job.

Chris then turned to Eddy, Double D, and Ed. "We actually had to make some very tough decisions for you assistants," Chris admitted, "But the votes have been tallied, and for each of you, we chose a partner. In first place, as Ed's partner, is a foreign born boy who talks funny. He is also an avid farmer, and your part time boss Ed," a blue haired teenager stepped out from the yacht that was tied to the dock, "Rolf!"

"Hello two leaky buckets Ed-boy," Rolf greeted Ed with his usual misplaced greeting. Ed, being Ed, didn't care.

"Hiyah Rolf!" Ed shouted excitedly, leaping onto his boss. Rolf tried his best to lift the flat head off of his person, and was disgusted when he finally stood up.

"Rolf's shirt is covered in the drool of the idiot!" he shouted in horror, "Mama! Get Rolf the blow drier!"

"Anyway," Chris said, an annoyed look covering his face, "Now onto Double D," Chris than began to read the card, "your partner is a nature lover with a head the size of Pluto," a boy with a head full of fuzz, and holding a wooden board jumped from the next yacht, "please welcome Johnny 2 by 4 and his loveable friend, Plank."

"Hey Double D!" Johnny shouted, and Double D waved back to him, smiling slightly. Then, to Double D's dismay, Johnny placed the plank of wood next to his ear. "What's that Plank?" Johnny asked, which weirding out most of the other campers. He then turned back to Double D, "Plank says you still need to work out more, Double D!"

Duncan and several other campers burst out laughing. "Well that is one smart hunk of wood," Duncan chuckled, which caused Double D to try to hide under his hat.

"And last but not least, Eddy," Chris than read another card, "Your partner has fondness for bike riding and his dad works at a local jawbreaker factory," a teen wearing a long-sleeved lime green shirt, black shorts/shoes and a red baseball hat with a black peak backwards and had a large chin walked off another yacht, "Kevin!"

"Oh great, I have to put up with Dorky through this whole thing?" Kevin pointed at Eddy who glared.

* * *

 **Double D:** Why in all good God's graces did I get Johnny assigned to be my partner!

 **Eddy:** Whose bright idea was it to get Shovel Chin as my partner?!

 **Chris:** We thought it would be funny.

 **Stan:** Man, I do not want to talk about my partner.

* * *

"So, that leaves us with the kids from South Park," Chris said, a ticked off scowl covering his face, "Where are they?!"

"They were late for the yachts," Chef, jumping out of one of the yacht that Johnny had been on, "so I sent them to drive here."

"Oh good," Chris said happily. An angry look covered Bojack's face.

"Okay seriously, I have been asking this since chapter 5," Bojack shouted irritably, "How in Hell's name do you drive onto an island, it makes no sense!"

Chris simply ignored him, turning around when he heard a bus pull up. Suddenly, a large African American stepped off the bus, a chef's hat on his head.

"Chef!" The boys shouted excitedly, running over to their large friend, "We thought we'd never see you again!"

"Well," Chef said a small frown around his face, "I was in the Super Adventure club for a few days, but I decided to leave when they tried to make me a child molester." While the boys ignored this, many of the other campers tensed, and Geoff quietly tried to nudge the boys away from the potential pedophile.

"So," Chris said, "Chef was not among those chosen, so please get the heck out of the way so we can get the real partners here."

Suddenly, about a dozen kids filed out of the bus. The first one was the only African American, and he wore a purple shirt. The next kid was a normal looking kid, with brown hair and a red shirt. After that was a kid with a weird twitch and spiky, messy blonde hair was the next kid to step out.

He was followed by two disabled kids. The first one was using two crutches attached to his arms, and he had brown hair. The second one was sitting in a wheel chair, and he had a large head and a stupid smile on his face. Right behind them was a young boy with a cute puff of blond hair coming from his head wearing a light blue shirt. He smiled and waved at the other boys, causing them to sigh in anger. The next kid to step off the bus was a boy with a weird blue hat. He glared at Cartman, and then flipped the entire camp off.

The next member off was the first girl, she had long blonde hair in curls. The second girl off caused Stan to cringe. She had pretty raven hair, and a pink beret. As she walked down, the smile on her face faded when she saw Stan. She turned away from him, and Stan sighed in exasperation.

"Wait a minute," Chris quietly mulled over the number of kids, "We should only have four kids, Butters for Cartman, Tweek for Kyle, Craig for Kenny, and Wendy for Stan." While all the boys' jaws dropped at the last pair, Chris scratched his head, when a final figure stepped off the bus.

The figure was a tall man, who wore a white robe. He had a brown beard, and a small smile covering his face. "I believe I can answer that," the man said, while readjusting his halo. While the entire camp stared in awe at the man, the four main boys rushed up to the man.

"Jesus!" they shouted excitedly, hugging the savior of the souls of the Earth, "We thought you'd died in Iraq!"

"Yes my children," Jesus said, putting a hand on Stan's head, "Those men in Iraq did kill me. But you have also forgotten that I am Jesus, I can revive my self whenever I want to." The boys nodded eagerly, while the other people on the island just gawked. How in his own name did Jesus end up as a friend with these kids?

Grim walked up to Jesus, a small glare coming from his eye sockets. Grim pointed at the man, and sneered, "I'll get you one day." Jesus just smiled and patted Death on the shoulder, which caused the lord of the underworld to shiver as he walked back to his father.

"So," Chef said as he turned to Chris, "About how we got all of the other kids to be able to come, it was actually quiet interesting story. You see, it all began when…"

* * *

 _(Five Days Earlier in South Park Elementary)_

" _Hello Students," Mr. Garrison said as she came into auditorium, which was filled with kids, "I hope you are all excited about the big, "We Love Jamie Lynn Spears!" community meeting this weekend. But wait a minute," Mr. Garrison said, getting into a fake thinking position, "That's right; no one under the age of thirteen is allowed to come!" He then pointed at the group of students and laughed, "HA!"_

 _Wendy looked around for a second, before raising her hand. Mr. Garrison then pointed at the brightest girl in class._

" _Yes Wendy?" she asked._

" _Ms. Garrison," Wendy explained, "None of us like Jamie Spears."_

 _As usual, Garrison ignored the obvious point made by his students, and then turned to students. "Now," the former male said, "The reason why we all called you here in the middle of summer is about your missing classmates, Stan, Kyle, Kenny, and Eric."_

" _So much for peace and quiet," Craig sighed, causing several of the other kids to snicker. Mr. Garrison did not listen to Craig, and continued._

" _Your classmates have actually been included in a Canadian reality show," the teacher said, "Now, they have lasted long enough for each of them to have a friend to come and come and help compete with then in a challenge. Their parents would have gone, but they all have tickets to Spears meeting!" He then pointed at them with a prideful look covering his face, only to fall silent when none of them responded to him._

" _So," Garrison said as he pulled out a list, "I guess will start with Eric's partner," the entire auditorium shivered, no one wanting to have to deal with the fat racist, who was also the least popular student in school. "And the honor goes to… Butters Scotch!"_

" _Aw Hamburgers!" The boy with a blond tuft of hair shouted in anguish. The rest of the auditorium let out a collective sigh of relief, they were safe._

" _Next, we have our representative for Kenny McCormick," Mr. Garrison continued, "and we have decided to allow Craig to be the next representative."_

 _Craig, the boy with the weird blue hat, flipped Mr. Garrison off. He did not want to get involved with those four idiots. This was going to be so stupid. He would probably hanging onto his life by a thread in the next few days, he guaranteed it._

" _Then of course, going to help Kyle Broflovski in the challenge is," The teacher read the name, "Tweek!"_

" _Oh God," Tweek, a jittery boy with spiky blond hair, spazzed when he heard his name announced, "Too much pressure!"_

" _Yes Tweek, we know everything is too pressure filled for you to do, now sit down and shut the fuck up!" Mr. Garrison yelled, which caused Tweek to scream and sit down, "And finally, for Stan Marsh, we have little Wendy Testaburger!"_

 _The entire auditorium gasped, shocked by Garrison's stupidity. Wendy shouted out, "Why would you pair Stan and I up!"_

" _Aren't you and Stan girlfriend and boyfriend?"_

" _We broke up!"_

" _Oh," Mr. Garrison said, before shouting out, "Too bad for you!" and began to laugh at the girl._

 _As the students began to file out, the four picked students followed Garrison to the bus, but, they were not alone._

 _(As Chef begins to drive the bus)_

 _Bebe, Jimmy, Timmy, Clyde, and Token all peeked out from behind the bush, seeing their friends board the bus._

" _How are we going to get on that bus?" Bebe asked herself. Clyde turned to her with a confused look._

" _Why would we want to get on, going to Canada will only make our lives miserable," he said, with the other boys nodding in agreement._

 _She slaps her forehead, before saying, "Because we have to make sure Wendy and the others don't get hurt up there, plus-"_

" _You-u s-still th-think that-at Kyle has a hot-t ass?" Jimmy guessed, stuttering do to his disability, and all the boys sweat dropped when Bebe blushed in agreement._

" _Timmah tim," Timmy, the boy in the wheelchair and an inability to say anything other than his own name, said, refocusing the group on their objective._

" _But how?" Token asked, "We would need a miracle to get on that bus, now that's it's already on its way to Canada."_

" _Don't worry guys," Bebe said confidently, "I have a plan."_

* * *

" _Are you sure this is a good idea?" Token said, as Bebe rang the door bell. The blond girl glared at him._

" _You said it your self, we would need a miracle to get on that bus, and this guy is the only one who can provide one," she said, as Jesus answered the doorbell. He smiled as he saw the children, and motioned for them to enter the house._

" _You need help getting on to the bus that is gong to Canada right," Jesus said, and then answered their shocked looks with, "I am Jesus, I can already tell what you are going to say."_

" _Well, yeah," Bebe said, and Jesus smiled, before waving his arm in a circular motion. The world around Jesus and the five children began to spin rapidly, until, they had disappeared out of the room._

* * *

" _We're here," Jesus said, as the he and the children appeared in the back of the bus. Chef, who was in the driver's seat, turned around in astonishment._

" _What are you doing here Jesus?" he asked._

" _These children wanted to come," Jesus aid, motioning to the five behind him, "And you know, I love all the children in the world," he then got into a thinking position for a moment, "except Cartman."_

" _Well I can't just take you all to Canada," Chef, the one from South Park, not the employee of the show, said, raising his arms in frustration, "I only have enough money to pay for all of our meals," He was answered by Jesus waving his arms, which caused a pile of pizza to appear, "All right, you can come."_

 _The children cheered as they began to munch on the pizza. Jesus simply smiled as he pulled out his country music magazine._

* * *

 _(Back at camp)_

"Can I switch my partner to Jesus?" Stan asked, fearfully looking over at his ex-girlfriend. She did not seem to care, looking blankly at the host.

"No way," Chris said angrily, glaring at the savior of humanity, "He'd probably use one of his miracles to give you an unfair advantage," he said, before adding, "plus it's better TV to have you work with your ex."

Stan sighed sadly, looking down at the ground in disappointment. The entire camp looked at Chris, as he motioned them towards the beach. They had no idea the torture that awaited them. And many could not dream of the consequences of this challenge.

* * *

"You're first challenge as a merged team," Chris said, pointing at a map with a long stick, "Is a two man cross-country river rafting trip," he then smiled at the group's looks of confusion.

"You and you're partner will first paddle the canoes out from the beach, to Boney island," he said, causing several of the campers to cringe at the thought of that accursed island, "There, you will take the inland water way across the island, dodging what ever obstacles you might face," he smiled at the increased amount of cringes.

"Then, once you have crossed the entire island," Chris continued, "You will continue to paddle to the island of cascading falls!"

* * *

 **Harold:** That does not sound good!

 **Ezekiel:** Does anyone else here feel like Chris really wouldn't mind if one of us dies.

 **Chris:** Of course I care if someone dies! If someone dies, then the show's ratings go down! Therefore, I get paid less!

* * *

"There," Chris said, pointing at the map," you will cross the river that goes through the island, till to get to the other side," he then turned to the campers with an angry look, "And what ever you do, when you reach the fork in the river, go left!"

"When you have gotten through the island," Chris said, turning back to the map, "All you have to do is paddle across the lake, to a dock on the other side," he then smiled as he turned back to the campers, "winner gets a fabulous reward," he smiled, "the first five teams will go on a river cruise for four days," the campers began to smile, "you will have five star meals, warm beds, and hot baths," the campers began to drool, "And, you will also be rewarded with your partners staying at the Playa De Losers, waiting for you to lose, and then giving you a friend to talk to while the remainder of the game continues."

"So get out there and paddle," Chris exclaimed, and the campers and there friends raced to the canoes. Stan quietly pushed the canoe off the shore, with Wendy completely ignoring him.

"So, how is it going?" Stan asked, trying to get her to talk as they began to paddle out from shore. Wendy did not even turn around, but she did give an answer.

"Oh, I thought you didn't give a shit about what I thought," Wendy said with a completely calm voice, which caused Stan to cringe.

* * *

 **Stan:** (Banging head against wall) Stupid, Stupid, STUPID!

* * *

D.J. was smiling as he and his mother began to paddle across the lake. He really loved his Mama. She smiled, before she remembered something she wanted to ask him.

"Devon," she asked sweetly, "I noticed you were sitting very close to that blond girl when I came in…"

This could not be good.

* * *

"Aggh!" Tweek screamed as he and Kyle pushed off from shore. The Jewish boy stared at the strange caffeinated boy.

"What's wrong," he asked.

"What's wrong?" Tweek said quickly, "I'm stuck here on a reality show, going to an island where I will be attacked my monstrous creatures, and you ask what's wrong?"

Kyle sighed. They should have never let Tweek be their fourth replacement friend. He was just not able to handle the stress of being part of the group.

* * *

 **Tweek:** Gahh! Oh Jesus I can't give you my thoughts clearly. What if I say something embarrassing! Gahh! Too much pressure!

* * *

Double D silently moved the paddle in the water, Johnny singing a happy song as he drifted through his own little world. Both of them were broken from the quiet when Ed and Rolf, racing through the water, passed them.

"Stroke Ed-boy! Stroke!" Rolf shouted into a megaphone, prompting Ed to follow his boss's direction, by stroking faster. Their canoe was travelling so fast, it caused a small wave while Eddy and Kevin were in their canoe fighting over who got to row in front.

That wave just so happened to be headed towards the boat carrying Kenny and Craig. With a great splash, it collided with the canoe, knocking Kenny out. As Kenny thrashed in the water, a tentacle came up from the depths and dragged the parka boy to the bottom.

"Oh my God!" Dib exclaimed as he rowed past the scene, "They Killed Kenny!"

"Keep rowing you bastard!" Gaz shouted, cracking a whip on her brother's back, causing the poor boy to scream in pain.

* * *

 **Double D:** Well who did not see that one coming!

 **Johnny:** I can't seem to find Plank. (Points at camera) have you seen him?

 **Plank:** (Sitting there silently, doing nothing)

* * *

Chris smiled as he walked down the dock, watching the campers disappear across the horizon.

"Well it looks like were running out of tape," He said, turning to the camera, "Well be sure to come back next week to the second half of this exciting challenge."

"Will Stan be able to survive with his ex-girlfriend?"

"Will D.J. be able to convince his mother that he and Bridgette should be in a relationship?"

"Will Kenny live long enough to stop being comedic relief?"

"Find out next time on Total Drama Island!"

Just as Chris is about to walk away, Izzy runs up behind him, pushing him into the lake.

"That's for not letting my parents come here!" She shouted, as she flipped the host off, "Asshole!" She then skipped back to the camp while Chris climbed out of the water and stared with horror at his reflection in the lake.

"NOT MY HAIR!"

* * *

 **Losers:** _Courtney, Zim, Noah, Eva, Sadie, Justin, Billy, Rusty, Trent, Cody, Beth, Wyatt, Katie, Homer, Ron, Frylock, Jonesy, Nikki, Tyler, Kim_

 _ **AN: What! There is no voting ceremony this time? Yeah, I think you are going to be seeing a lot more of these multi-chapter challenges. I hope you like the idea of the campers loved ones coming to compete. This is a very important chapter for a number of reasons.**_

 _ **This chapter is going to start a process of making Stan a major character in the story. So far, he and Kyle were just background voices compared to Cartman (Villain) and Kenny (He died a lot)**_

 _ **Morty is finally going to retake his place as another major character. He hasn't had much air time lately, mostly due to the fact that he needed to have a few chapters off after a numerous chapter stretch of him being the major protagonist.**_

 _ **This challenge will test both of the bedrock pairings of the story, Gweoff, and Didgette will both have to overcome major obstacles.**_

 _ **Courage will also be explored further.**_

 _ **This story will also have a major affect on who gets into the next season!**_


	23. Chapter 23

Chris: Last time on Total Drama Island. The campers got to meet up with their loved ones for our next challenge. Izzy got angry because her parents weren't there, Double D and Eddy are annoyed because they're working with Johnny and Kevin, and Stan got a big surprise when we decided to partner him up with his ex-girlfriend Wendy. By some weird coincidence, Jesus also showed up, and D.J. was just about to discuss his relationship with Bridgette with his mother.

Will Stan be able to win Wendy's heart back?

Will D.J. be able to live with the guilt of having his illegal alliance hidden from his mother?

Will Kenny ever live through an episode? I mean, even when we cut the challenges into to parts, he dies in both parts! That is a little weird even for me!

Find out next, on Total Drama Island!

* * *

 _(Cue theme Song!)_

* * *

Mandy eyed Boney Island with distaste as she and Irwin rowed their canoe towards it. This island was scary enough to even give her the creeps! As she eyed the giant trees that were dimmed in the shadow of the fog. The sounds of the monsters that inhabited the island were echoing across the water into the canoe, and a weird sucking sound was coming from the rear of the boat. With fear, she lifted up her paddle and turned around to see that the strange sucking sound was coming from…

"Irwin?" Mandy asked in disgust, as Irwin made a kissing motion at her. The black boy noticed this, and began to take a nudge toward the back of the boat.

"Um," Irwin said fearfully, rearing at the sight of Mandy narrowing her eyes, "I just thought you might want some comfort in the dark, scary-OW!"

Mandy began to pummel the idiot with her oar, causing the nerd to scream in pain. She then decided how much more expectable the setting became when she was causing Irwin pain.

"OW!" she wacked him again, making her calmer still. "OW!" now she was even calmer. "OW! OW! OW! OW!" wow, amazing how something scary can be so much more fun when you are doing something you enjoy.

"OW!"

* * *

 **Irwin:** (Covered in bandages) yeah, Mandy likes to play hard to get. But I will never give up, EVER! (Punches door, only to hold his hand in agony) OW! I GOT A SPLINTER!

* * *

"You shouldn't be thinking about getting a girlfriend right now Devon Joseph," D.J.'s mother explained while he rowed the boat through the fog, "You have more important things to do, like study."

"Momma," D.J. countered fearfully, "I have straight A's, and all the teachers say I am one of their favorite students."

"Devon," his mother scolded, "you know how I feel about girlfriends. You shouldn't have a relationship with someone until you are sure they are the one," she said, admiring a small ring on her finger, "That is the way that your father was with me."

"Momma," D.J. whined, "How am I supposed to know if a girl is the right one without at least trying to have a girlfriend?"

"Listen to me Devon," his mother said strictly, "I know that you think this Bridgette girl is special, but I don't trust her. I don't want some girl to lead you on, only to dump you for someone more popular."

"HOW DARE YOU!" a voice screamed from the fog. With a few quick strokes, Bridgette, and her red-faced mother emerged from the cloak of mist, the teen trying in vain to rein her mother in.

"My Bridge is the sweetest, kindest girl ever; she would never do something like that!" Bridgette's mother screamed in a fury.

"How do you know," D.J.'s mother accused, pointing a finger at the woman in front of her, "Girls are just little puppet-masters who wind boys up, only to throw them away when they want a new one."

"Your boy is lucky that my Bridgette even thought about being in a relationship with him!"

"You want to throw down, Beach Bum!"

"Bring it, OLD LADY!"

"I'LL SHOW YOU OLD! YOU HIPPIE!"

Both teens looked at each other in discomfort as their mothers began an insult war of epic proportions.

* * *

 **D.J.:** I have learned one absolute in life. If Momma not happy, then nobody happy. Unfortunately, we're dealing with two very unhappy mommas.

 **Bridgette:** I have never seen my Mom get that angry. (Looks down at the ground) You don't think that I would just dump D.J. when another guy comes along, do you?

 **D.J.:** I also don't want to talk about the alliance with Chef Thing. Momma would be so disappointed in me for cheating.

* * *

"So Coach is getting on me for being here, huh," Geoff said to Parker, who laughed heartily. The larger teen began to watch the cove, before an idea bulb popped over his head.

"So," Parker asked nonchalantly, have you found a girl you want to date here?"

"Well," Geoff began, rather embarrassed about being put on the spot, "There is this one really nice girl. She is very nice, and her name is Gwen."

"So, the hot, blonde, babe with nice assets," Parker aid lustfully. Geoff shook his head.

"No, not her, she's the-"

"Girl with blue sweater and blond hair?"

No that's Bridgette, and even if I wanted, D.J. likes her," Geoff responded, causing Parker to hold his head in confusion.

"Then who could it be?" Parker asked his quarterback.

"The one who's, you know," Geoff said, before pausing as Parker stared at him, "… Goth."

"…oh crap." Parker said, staring at his friend like he was a stranger, "I don't know you any more."

Geoff stared with confusion as his friend stopped rowing, putting down the oar and sat there in boat.

"What!"

* * *

 **Geoff:** Why is he so upset I am interested in someone who is a Goth! How is that at all relevant to him?!

* * *

Jesus was silently strolling though the camp. The children he had gotten on the bus were now exploring the camp, looking around at the area where their classmates had been sleeping for the past few weeks.

"What-t do you think-k is in here?" Jimmy asked his buddy, Timmy. He was pointing at a small shed with his crutch.

"Timmah!" Timmy said. To anyone else, this was undecipherable, but to Jimmy, it was plain as day.

"Well, I g-guess I'll j-just have to che-check it out then," Jimmy said, opening the shed. He screamed in horror when he was attacked by none other than- THE SLOPPY JOE MONSTER.

"GET THIS FUCKING THING OFF OF ME!" the handicapped boy screamed, while Timmy, thinking quickly, rolled his wheel chair over the creature. Unfortunately, that meant he was also rolling over Jimmy's face, and causing his friend great pain.

Eventually, the creature ran off into the woods, leaving the boys sitting there. Jesus' jaw was dropped at the sight. He stood there for a minute, before finally being able to craft a few words.

"What a weird camp."

* * *

 **Jesus:** Hello my children. I am here to tell you the best way to reach salvation. It starts by following the ten command-

 _(Door opens to reveal Chris)_

 **Chris:** Sorry J, the network says you can't preach. Something about it insulting atheists or something.

 _(Closes door)_

 **Jesus:** What a weird network.

* * *

"I can't believe I am actually on reality TV," Lois said, as she and Stewie paddled down the river, "This is more exciting than that time we saw the Eiffel Tower."

"Oh, that isn't the most exciting part of this trip," Stewie said, silently pulling out a stick, which he began to sharpen into a dagger, "the real fun begins when you meet... MR. POINTY STICK!" Stewie then began to stab viscously at Louis, but the stick was not that sharp, so his attempts at matricide were for naught.

"Hey Peter," Joe said, pointing at Stewie, "Don't you think you should go take that kid to a psychologist?"

"That reminds me of the time that…OH CRAP!" Peter shouted, pointing at the shore, where none other than the giant chicken! The chicken jumped into the boat, knocking the fat man out of the canoe, and into the river. Like always, a cross country fight began, and predictably, the fight came to an end when Peter, bruised and bloodied, grabbed the chicken, and threw him into the pond of quick sand.

"Forget about Stewie," Joe muttered as Peter hopped back into the boat, "The one who really needs therapy is Peter. No wonder Cleveland left for his own spinoff that one time."

As the canoe paddled away, a fist covered in yellow feathers shot up from the sand, and clinched in anger.

* * *

"This place seems awesome," Gerald, the teen working with Harold said as they paddled through the fog. Harold smiled.

"Yeah, kind of like the marsh of Gulgomoth in Daggers and Demons," Harold said as he sighed happily. It was great telling all of his adventures to Gerald. It was great for someone else to understand his rad skills.

"What's that?" Gerald asked, pointing at something in the distance. Harold squinted his eyes, trying to get a better view of the shore line. He was shocked when he suddenly saw the shore lined with…

…adorable woodland critters? There was a squirrel, a deer, a rabbit, a beaver, a bear, and all sorts of other cute little creatures. Harold also noticed they were all dressed in Christmas outfits. The squirrel suddenly scurried up to the shore, close to where the canoe was drifting on the water.

"Well hello there fine sir," the squirrel said, with a weird southern accent. Wait a minute, did that squirrel just talk!

"Um," Harold mumbled, rather confused at the situation he was in, "fine."

"Well that's good," the critter responded, before putting himself into a thinking position, "say, would you happen to like to join our party today, it has been a long time since we last got a human or two to come."

Harold thought about it for a moment. "What happens at this party?" Gerald asked.

"Food, drinks," Squirrel began, before Rabbit interrupted it.

"Sacrifice you to the devil," it said happily, causing both teens to slowly paddle away from shore, with identical looks of horror across their faces.

"Rabbit you idiot!" Bear said, "Now we have to use one of those weird lookin' beavers again!'

As Harold and Gerald returned to the middle of the river, they ran into Ezekiel and his father.

"We are looking for a faster way through the island," Ezekiel's dad explained, "We thought maybe the land route would be faster, eh!"

"DON"T GO TO SHORE!" The two geeks shouted in fear and anger, causing the other boat riders to look at them in shock.

* * *

 **Ezekiel:** I wonder what about that island caused Harold to weird in.

 **Harold:** Believe me; I hope I never have to go to that island again. I'm fine with a few things this show has made me go through, but I draw the line at Satan worshiping Christmas Critters!

* * *

Many of the campers were happy to finally out of the fog. Now, they could see the next island. The water flowed peacefully as the canoes neared it. Many of the campers were slightly shocked. The island seemed completely normal.

"This is the island of Cascading Falls," Gwen said with a small chuckle, "I think Chris might finally have lost it."

When Gwen chuckled, Geoff smiled at her, until he noticed Parker making gagging sounds from behind him. He glared at his friend, who just ignored his angry look.

* * *

 **Geoff:** What's wrong with Parker?! All he has done for this entire trip has chastised me for liking Gwen. There is nothing with Gwen, she is really nice!

* * *

"And that is how I ran for governor," Mr. Peanutbutter said proudly, causing Bojack to groan. It was days like today that he really wished Todd was here. At least he was more tolerable than his old rival.

* * *

 **Bojack:** Look, I admit that I'm a bit jealous of Mr. Peanutbutter's happy-go-lucky attitude sometimes. But that doesn't mean that I still don't get annoyed by it.

* * *

The hill down the face of the island was beginning to gain a steeper decline. The campers suddenly began to notice the fast currents, and were horrified to see large rapids in their path. Heather glared at Gwen.

"You just had to go and say this place wasn't bad, didn't you Goth!" she shouted as she pointed at Gwen accusingly. Gwen shrugged, and then began to giggle when Heather was splashed by a wave from a nearby rock.

The water began to get faster, making it harder to steer. The water rocked the canoes back and forth across the creek, causing Ezekiel to hold his stomach in pain, before turning his head to the stern a puking. His father quickly followed him.

* * *

 **Ezekiel:** Yeah, I inherited my weak stomach from my dad, eh.

* * *

"Chris my son," Jesus said warily as he followed Chris into a tent, "It is wrong for you to hold a grudge against Andrew. After all, revenge will only lead you on the path to Satan."

"Put a sock in it kill joy," Chris sneered, as Jesus sighed. He really wondered how someone like Chris could come into being. Was it really that fun to torture innocent people?

Chris began to ruffle through a drawer on the side of Andrew's desk, only to notice a large button. A sticky note was attached to the top of it. Chris picked up the sticky note and read it aloud.

" _Do not press this button_ ," Chris read, before turning it around, " _That means you Chris_!" Chris glared while Jesus tried to wave his hands frantically at the angry host. "Don't press this!" Chris shouted, while he pounded his fist down onto the button, activating it. Jesus slapped his hand to his forehead!

* * *

A red buzzer began to activate, alarming Andrew as he sat in a small room with comfortable chairs and several big screen TV's. He walked up to a computer, turned it on, and looked in horror at what he saw.

"My ultimate plan, nuclear missile plan for killing Jamie Spears has been activated!" he shouted in shock, "But I left the activation button in the camp…" He suddenly stopped to process what just happened.

"And another dramatic comeback has been accomplished by Brett Favre," Tony Dungy said on the TV, "and I must say, it was the single greatest play I have ever seen. If a person missed it, they are not a true football fan."

"…I AM GOING TO FUCKING KILL YOU CHRIS MCLEAN!" Andrew shouted in a fury.

* * *

 _(Back at camp)_

"I feel a pay-cut coming on," Chris said fearfully, holding his head, and more importantly his hair, in fright.

* * *

 **Jesus:** Causing a nuclear disaster, _(Sighs as he begins to right down something on a list)_ another century in purgatory for you Mr. Mclean.

* * *

"Die, 70's trash!" Momma D.J. shouted as she swung her purse at Bridgette's mother's head. The blonde woman dodged adeptly, before grabbing her oar, and swinging it at the older woman.

The two teens sighed as their mothers duked it out. They both looked sadly at one another. They then noticed a split in the creek. There was a sign at the split. It was pointing to the left, indicating the route they were supposed to take.

"Um, Mom," Bridgette said, trying to get her mother's attention. She was promptly ignored her daughter, as the two canoes were pulled into the current.

"Wendy, we need to paddle fast now!" Stan pointed at the fork in the river, only to see Wendy stare at him with hateful eyes.

"Why should I listen to you," she asked accusingly, waving her arms frantically, Shouting out all the anger that had been building up inside her for the past few days, "Even before we broke up and you started cursing me, you always got me into trouble. You got me into problems with those aliens, made me kill our substitute teacher, and even get breast implants when you were so focused on Bebe!"

"… You killed Ms. Ellen?" Stan asked in a dead pan voice. Wendy's face boiled into a scarlet red.

"That's it!" she shouted angrily, lifting up her oar, "Stan, I am about to teach you a very important lesson that cost Ms. Ellen her life!" She then swung the oar at his head, barely missing it, "Don't fuck with Wendy Testaburger!"

"Wendy, stop!" Stan shouted fearfully, ducking under the next swing. Unfortunately, although quite predictably, the canoe next theirs was Craig and Kenny's boat. Kenny only turned around to see the oar come and detach his head from his body.

"Oh Rolf's Lord!" The son of Sheppard shouted in horror, "Those sons of illegitimate birth murdered the orange parka wearing boy!"

"What?" Craig said, as his boat began to float to the left side of the creek.

Morty slapped his forehead, as he and Summer began to go to the right, the wrong path.

"He means, _"Oh my God, They Killed Kenny! You Bastards!"_ ", Morty explained, as he, Rick, Ed, Double D, Eddy, Stan, Bridgette, and D.J. all began to travel down the right side of the river with their partners. The rest headed down the correct path.

"Man," Peter commented to Joe, "That Wendy is crazier than Japanese Fisherman!"

* * *

 _(Cue Cutaway)_

 _It was a beautiful day in Miami, as the crowd cheered for their hometown Dolphins. They also gave out well deserved boos to the Patriots, who were tied with the Dolphins for the lead of the AFC division._

" _Well were here for a great day of… Oh God Damnit!" John Gruden shouted, as a group of Japanese people, dressed up in traditional kimonos rushed the field, "Japanese people are rushing the field!"_

 _The Japanese showed no mercy to the Dolphins, slaughtering all of them. Not even Chad Henne or Ricky Williams escaped! The Patriots just watched from their sidelines._

 _"Fuck_ _you Dolphins!" a Japanese man shouted as the Japanese said as they escaped from the field. Tom Brady suddenly started celebrating._

" _We win the division by default!" he cheered, as the entire sideline began to hug one another._

" _Not yet you haven't," An old man with a number twelve jersey said as he and another group of old men rushed the field, "We, the members of the 1972 Dolphin team challenge you for the division crown now!"_

" _What can a group of fifty year olds do to us!" Randy Moss asked mockingly._

 _(Five hours later)_

" _And in one of the greatest games I have ever seen, the old members of the 1972 Dolphins have beaten the New England Patriots, and are going to the playoffs!" John Gruden shouted excitedly, as the Patriots began to weep at their defeat._

 _(End Cutaway)_

* * *

The eight campers and their teammates who had gone down the wrong creek were now experiencing a very bumpy ride, rocked by the large rocks around the rapids. They were all happy when suddenly, the water became calm, as the creek itself became wider.

"Oh dear," Double D said, remembering something form one of his books. He quickly took out a calculator and his face turned grim.

"My friends," he said solemnly, "I have just remembered that a widening river and a calm river mean only one thing," The sounds of water crashing into giant boulders became audible, "A waterfall."

The ten campers screamed as they began to near the edge. They tried to paddle away from the falls, but the current was too strong.

"AHHHHH!" The campers screamed as the fell. Luckily, D.J. grabbed hold of an outcropping branch, and his mother grabbed onto his leg, and then everyone else began to grab onto the chain.

"…Well this could have gone better," Stan said, rather ticked off. Johnny started to look around.

"Hey, where is Plank!"

* * *

Courage looked around the creek worriedly for his friends. He really liked spending time with D.J. and Bridgette, and he did not want them to get hurt. He suddenly remembered something. He turned to his fortune teller, partner, and mumbled something.

"I am sorry," she said with a shake of her head, "I can do nothing to help them at the current moment." She smiled when she saw Courage sigh. "You have grown close to the kind one and the girlfriend of the kind one, correct."

Courage mumbled something, which caused Shirley to cringe. She rubbed the back of her head with a small frown.

"Well, the reason I ask is…" Shirley said, trying to come up with an excuse for Courage, when she sighed sadly.

"Dog, I was afraid I was going to have to be the one to tell you, but," she looked into the water in shame, "the reason I am your partner, is because, the stupid one and his wife could not have possibly made the journey."

When Courage stared at her with a look of confusion, she sighed.

"When you were gone, Le Quack came back with a plan to kill you," she began, as the flow began to carry them down the river, "He planted a virus in a box, which had _" **big bucks** "_ written on it."

"Naturally, the stupid one opened the box, thus releasing a horrible virus upon him and his wife," Courage began to tear up when he realized where this was leading.

"No cure could be found, so… they died," She said sadly, as Courage began to bawl.

"The wife of the stupid one wanted me to give you this," Shirley said, pulling out a long letter. Courage grabbed the piece of paper, as tears continued to pour from his eyes.

 _Dear Courage,_

 _I am sorry about dying like this. That mean, nasty duck tricked Eustace, and Dr. Vindaloo could not find a cure, even though he assured us, "There was no problem at all." I hope you have had fun so far on your TV show. Unfortunately, I became ill before it aired, so I was unable to see how you have done._

 _Anyway, I am sorry to say that poor Eustace can't write, so I took over the distribution of the property we have gained throughout the years. Therefore, this letter also serves as a will, and I leave to you all my earthly possessions to you Courage, and the new family that wishes to take care of you._

 _This includes the farmhouse in Nowhere._

 _The bank account in Nowhere for the sum total 50 thousand dollars._

 _All of the possessions inside the Farmhouse._

 _I hope you enjoy life Courage. Don't worry, I will still always watch out for you. I will always be with you._

 _Love,_

 _Muriel_

Courage's eye's continued to burst in water as he read the letter, until he could finally not handle in anymore, and began to sob as the Shirley gave him a look of pity. She sighed as she looked into the creek, the water lapping up against the boat.

* * *

"This is all your fault you hippie," D.J.'s mother snarled at Bridgette's mother, "If you hadn't been attacking me, we wouldn't have made a wrong turn!"

"My fault!" Bridgette's mom shouted in anger, "I'm not the one who used pepper spray."

"Will you two shut up!" both of the mothers were shocked when they heard the voice that shouted at them.

"Poppy doo?" D.J.'s mother asked with shock, "How dare you speak to your mother that way!"

"Momma, listen to me," D.J. said, "I understand you are just worried about me, but you need to realize that you have to let me make my own decisions."

"I'm sorry Poppy Doo," his mother said firmly, "But I have to do what I think is right, and I do not-"

"If you don't stop trying to mess with Bridgette and Me," D.J. shouted, "I am going to let go of this branch."

"No you fucking idiot!" Stan shouted, as Wendy continued to punch him, "If you let go, we all drop to our deaths!"

"Can you honestly think of a better way down?"

"Maybe we should wait for, um, the man with bad smelling hair to pick us up," Rolf suggested. Morty and the rest of the members of camp looked at Rolf for a second, turned to one another, and burst out laughing.

"Oh man, I haven't laughed that well in years," D.J. said happily, wiping a tear from his eye. Unfortunately, D.J needed his hands to do this. And, with his hands preoccupied wiping away a tear of laughter, they could not be used for holding the branch.

Stan glared at D.J., "You Dumbass!" He screamed as the group fell to the river below.

* * *

"ARE YOU READY TO ROCK!" Jamie Lynn Spears shouted as the entire group of South Park adults stood cheering her, "Well then-"

Suddenly, a whooshing sound was heard. Jimbo quickly looked outside.

"Dear god," he shouted fearfully, "It's a missile!"

These were the last words that the entire town of South Park heard, as the missile quickly hit the center of town, and blew it off the map.

* * *

Chris was staring at the now charred remains of the town, as Jesus, Chef, the other Chef (The Good One), Bebe, Token, Clyde, Jimmy and Timmy stared at him with dropped jaws.

"Oops?" he said while shrugging.

* * *

Stan pulled himself up from the water, coughing as he tried to catch his breath. He looked around, and saw Rick, Morty, Summer, Jerry, Double D, Ed, Eddy, Rolf, Johnny, Kevin, D.J., Bridgette, and their mothers were safe as they doggy paddled on the water's surface. He suddenly realized something.

"Where's Wendy!" he screamed, and slammed his head under the water. He rammed his head under the water, and caught a glimpse of pink.

"I'm coming Wendy!" he shouted, as he swam to the bottom. He looked around the bottom, and could not see her. When he realized he was running out of breath. He turned up to the surface sadly, only to feel a tug on his shirt. He turned in horror to see his sleeve was stuck on a branch of a fallen tree trunk.

He began to struggle against the branch, but he began to cough. He realized he was blacking out. As he reached up, he saw a shadow approaching him.

* * *

"So let me get this straight," Chris said, a dead planned as he was currently held in a jail cell, "I just slaughtered a town of five thousand people by using a nuclear missile that was aimed at Jamie Lynn Spears."

"That's right uncle fucker," a man with a blue t-shirt said to him. This man was extremely weird due to his flapping head, which caused his cranium to separate from his jaw every time he talked. "And you just caused an international incident. Now Canada is going to have to give up a lot of money, and do you know how much farther in debt we'll be!"

"Don't worry though," another weird flapping head man said, with a red t-shirt instead of a blue one, "you'll be out in two days. The US was willing to let us try you, and you go off with one severe paddling!"

"Paddling?" Chris said, only to turn to see a muscular man with a paddle with a red maple leaf standing next to him.

"NOOO!"

* * *

"COUGH!"

Stan blinked as he suddenly realized he was on solid ground. He looked up, only to see Wendy staring at him, without her hat.

"You idiot," she said, though with a mildly happy tone, "I was already on shore, you just forgot to turn around. You only saw my hat."

Stan sighed, as he saw the others looking around the woods.

"How are we supposed to get to the other island now?" Stan asked, and none of the others seemed as though they were able to come up with a plan. They suddenly heard a chopping sound in the air.

They looked up to see a helicopter fluttering in the air. They were all shocked, when none other than Izzy poked her head out from the side.

"Get on, we can still get you guys to the other island first!" she shouted.

"How did you find us!" Bridgette shouted.

Izzy smiled. "My new pal told me you were in trouble," she said, as a familiar piece of wood stuck its head out.

"Plank!" Johnny shouted out, "You saved us!"

The five pairs hurried onto the copter, which took off toward the destination island.

* * *

Noah was silently sitting at the dock. It was the only place he could get any peace and quiet now that Courtney was back. Her screams combined with those of Katie and Sadie to make life unbearable. But, he was also trying to get away from Justin, who was continuing to annoy him with his muscles and good looks.

Beth was okay, but she stuttered every time she talked. And Cody was also fun, but still he just wanted to be alone.

He suddenly heard a chopping in the air, and saw a helicopter hurtling towards him. Noah was fast enough to dodge the large aerial machine.

"Another day," Noah said, as he glared at the disembarking campers, "another migraine."

* * *

"What do you mean they still win!" Heather shouted as Andrew began to finish explaining the challenge, "they didn't take the right path, and then they use a helicopter to get here."

"Well to bad," Andrew said, "They were the first eight groups here, so they win. I am also sorry to say, that due to a Chris related mishap, the town of South Park was blown from the face of the earth."

All of the South Park citizens who had been on the rafting trip looked in shock. Then, however Craig just shrugged.

"Dude, what the fuck's the matter with you!" Stan shouted angrily.

"I never would have guessed that for once you guys would actually do something good for me," he said, though everybody looked at him angrily.

"OH JESUS!" Tweek shouted, "What are we going to do! -

 _(Two hours later)_

"-AAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!"

"Well," Andrew said, removing a handy dandy pair of acme earmuffs, "I guess since Chris caused all this, I can let you all stay here at Playa Des losers until the show is over. Now, the five groups who won are off on their cruise, and the rest of you say good bye, and get ready for a major vote."

"So, are you going to say goodbye or what?" Geoff asked Parker. Parker snorted.

"I thought you were cool," he said, "and then you go after some goth? Hah, not likely!"

Geoff glared at Parker, before socking him in the eye, sending the lineman off the dock. Soon Irwin was also in the water.

"You do realize that he didn't deserve that," Geoff said to Mandy, who shrugged nonchalantly.

* * *

"Since Chris isn't here, I will handle the marshmallow giving out," Chef said evilly. The campers who had not won a reward glared at the chef.

* * *

 **Geoff:** You know, I hardly know you, but you shouldn't do that to a guy who likes you.

 **Grim:** This is the perfect opportunity to get rid of an annoying little pest.

 **Heather:** Sorry, but you are just too good to be allowed to get any further.

* * *

"First marshmallow goes to Gwen."

Gwen caught her marshmallow swiftly.

"Then, we have Geoff, Jen, Jude, Fry, Leela, Bender, Harold, Heather, Caitlin, Dib, Shake, Meatwad, Early, Owen, Kyle, Cartman, Kenny, Peter, Stewie, Brian, Bart, Leshawna, Courage, Bojack, Lindsey, and Grim who also get marshmallows along with our ten immune contestants, Jack, Izzy, D.J., Stan, Rick, Morty, Ed, Eddy, Bridgette, and Double D."

"So that leaves us with Mandy and Zeke as our final contestants."

Ezekiel began to tremble with fright, while Mandy just yawned.

"And the final marshmallow goes to…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…Ezekiel!"

"WHAT!" Mandy screamed, as Ezekiel happily began to munch on this marshmallow, "You can't vote me off!"

"We can and we have," Heather said confidently, as Mandy, foaming at the mouth, was dragged onto the Boat of Losers. Mandy glared at the campers waving goodbye at the docks, only to hear crappy violin music behind her.

She turned to see Irwin playing the music. "Isn't the moon so romantic my love?"

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

* * *

"Isn't that moon so romantic Stan?" Wendy asked the boy next to her, as they sat out on the dock of the ship. The noise of the Ed, Edd n Eddy partying echoed across the dock, with a rousing song of _That's my Horse!_ Apparently D.J. and Bridgette's mothers had agreed to stop fighting and let the two teens try to have a relationship.

"I guess so," Stan said, as he stared at the girl next to. He suddenly blushed, as she leaned closer to him.

"You were very brave to go and try to save me Stan," she said, her face inching towards his. He smiled, as he began to lean closer too. They were about to kiss, when something began to build in the back of Stan's throat.

"BLUCK!" He accidently threw up on Wendy's face. But instead of being angry, she just smiled.

"Like old times, huh?"

* * *

 **Losers:** _Courtney, Zim, Noah, Eva, Sadie, Justin, Billy, Rusty, Trent, Cody, Beth, Wyatt, Katie, Homer, Ron, Frylock, Jonesy, Nikki, Tyler, Kim, Mandy_

 _ **AN: Well, how was that for a chapter? South Park has been destroyed and Courage has now lost his entire family. What will happen now? You'll have to keep reading to see what happens next. Also, let me make this clear, D.J. and Bridgette's mothers, Rolf, Kevin, Johnny, Plank, Jesus and all the remaining survivors for South Park will be staying at Playa Des Losers. What this means, You will have to see later.**_

 _ **Sorry all Mandy fans, but I hate what she does to Grim, and she lasted past her usefulness. Plus this means Grim has now gained his freedom having outlasted both Billy and Mandy. Until next time.**_


	24. Chapter 24

Chris: Last Time on Total Drama Island. The campers went on a cross country rafting trip with their loved ones. We saw some pretty freaky things on those islands, including a satanic bunch of Woodland Critters. Eventually, D.J. was able to convince his mother to allow him to be in a relationship with Bridgette, Stan managed to regain Wendy's heart with his selfless actions, and Plank came through in the end to help his pal and the other lost campers win reward.

Oh yeah _(We see a close up of him, strapped to a wall)_ I got sentenced to two days of torture. _(Paddle slaps his back, causing him to scream)_

Any way, who will follow Mandy as the second voted off camper after the merge?

How will I get back at Andrew for using me as a scapegoat for that missile?

And will Kenny ever actually live through an episode?

Find out now _(Slapped by paddle again, causing him to scream, and then speak in a very weak worn out voice) on total drama island. Uh._

* * *

 _(Cue theme song)_

* * *

"So how was that cruise guys?" Geoff asked a newly arrived D.J. and Bridgette over breakfast. They both looked happily at each other and blushed.

"It was great," D.J. admitted. Geoff snickered under his breath, until he heard the door crash open.

"Hello Campers!" Chris shouted. He was oblivious to the snickers, as many of the campers could see the bruises caused by the time he had spent in jail.

"I hope that you enjoyed your two days off," he continued, "Because now we are having our next challenge," he honked a small circus horn, "a cross country road trip!"

The entire camp looked shocked at the host, as they tried to come up with a response to this new information. It was probably Geoff who gave the best response.

"Awesome!"

* * *

Chris had lead the campers to the campfire pit. He pulled out a small list, and smiled at the campers.

"You will be divided up into six teams," he smiled sadistically, as the groups he made while he was in prison were sure to stir up some drama, "I will call out your name and group, and then you will go stand over on the number of the group you have been assigned."

"For our first group, we have Peter," Peter shouted happily, "Leshawna," she smiled silently as she stood up, "Stewie," Stewie shouted in anger at having to be with the fat man, "Brian," he too was angry that he had to work with Peter, "and Duncan," all four groaned about having the punk in their group.

"I can't believe I'm stuck with big, loud and proud, a fat idiot, a liberal dog, and a matricidal baby," Duncan seethed, as he stepped onto the group one platform.

"Group number two," Chris continued, ignoring the complaints of group one, "is Stan, Kyle, Cartman, and Kenny!"

"Aw come on!" Heather shouted angrily, "how can they be in a group? None of them even have a license."

"Actually," Stan chuckled as he pulled out a plastic card, "I kind of do."

* * *

 **Stan:** One of the great things about the DMV is that they really don't care who gets a license as long as they get paid.

 **Heather:** Stupid Government employees.

* * *

"Team three is made up of Heather, Lindsey, Caitlin, Leela, and Izzy!" The three remaining members of Heather's alliance and the cyclops all grimaced as they looked at their final member, who was currently trying to touch her tongue to her elbow, an impossible task.

"Team four, or as I call them, team lame, is Harold, Ezekiel, Dib, Morty, and Jack!"

* * *

 **Dib:** How am I lame, I caught a real live alien! that has to be cool!

 **Geoff:** How in God's name did Jack get the title of lame?

 **Chris:** He ruined my bets. I bet on Jack to be out before the merge, and I don't like to lose bets. But, guess I should have known when Chuck Norris bet on him.

 **Chuck:** _(Chuckling while counting wad of cash)_

* * *

"Now on for team five," Chris continued, "This team has Jude and Jen," The two pals just high fived each other, "Grim," the lord of Death smiled silently, "Bart," the prankster pumped his fist in the air, "Shake," The sentient cup was eating a piece of pie that he somehow had, "Early," The redneck octopus was chugging a bottle of bourbon, "and of course our big bag of fun, Owen!" The six previously called members cringed when they were suddenly swooped up into bear hug.

"This is AWESOME! WOO HOO!" The burly teen shouted, crushing his teammates, until they were all conked out.

* * *

 **Owen:** There have been better first meetings with a team.

 **Grim:** (Throat slashing movement)

* * *

"Next we have team six, with Double D, who has managed to get his license, Eddy, Ed, Meatwad, Bojack, Fry, and Bender."

The seven all looked at each other, and while Double D, Eddy, and Ed were happy to be together, the other members of the team all had frowns.

* * *

 **Bojack:** Great, I got a human dictionary, who lacks any sort of athletic ability, a greedy midget, a drunk robot, a pile of hamburger meat, and a human cesspool. Nothing against these guys, but I would rather be with one of my friends. But, they're still better than Heather or Rick. That guy is a real freak.

* * *

"And the final team will be Gwen, Geoff, Rick, Courage, Bridgette, and D.J.," the six smiled as they realized they were in a group together.

"Now that all of the groups have been assigned, get over to the helicopter, were going to take you guys back to the lots, where Andrew has your vehicles," Chris said, as the campers all walked over to the helicopter, wondering exactly what kind of road trip this was going to be.

* * *

"Hello guys," Andrew said, smiling as the campers disembarked onto the lot, all of them feeling slightly woozy after the long trip, "What's wrong with you? Did Chris fly you over here?" Andrew glared at Chris, who tried his best to hide behind Chef.

"Any way, I'm sure that you want to know where you are going on this trip, but first let's get to the cool parts, the cars!" Suddenly seven SUV's drove up to the groups. Only Bridgette did not seem excited by the car selections. "These babies have a five hundred horse power engine, diamond studded wheels, and best of all, cup holders!"

"Awesome!" Geoff said, suddenly running up and hugging the nearest vehicle, "I so owe you one for this Andrew."

"Chris wanted me to give you all pink beetles, however I mercifully decided against it," the campers glared at Chris, "Any who, lets get to the challenge. This challenge is first a race out of Toronto, across the Canadian border, into Upstate New York, where you will proceed to go farther south. Once there, you will go to Heinz field in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, where you will receive your next clue in this great race across the United States."

"Now get in your cars before I decide to change back to beetles," Andrew finished, which caused all of the campers to jump into their cars quickly.

* * *

 _(Team One)_

"I'm driving," Duncan said, causing Leshawna to glare at him.

"You lost your license when you went to juvie," she said angrily, "No way am I getting arrested by the police in a foreign country because of your reckless driving."

"So I guess that means I'm driving," Peter said, causing both Stewie and Brian to cringe.

"Yeah, that's a great idea," Brian then turned to Leshawna, "don't let him, last time he did a big cross country trip, he ended up getting us all lost in Oklahoma. It was worse than that time that he and Quagmire got into a fight without realizing it."

* * *

 _(Cutaway)_

" _Off we go," Peter said as he drove the family out of the neighborhood, "We are going to have such a great time." Suddenly he heard his phone buzz, and picked it up._

" _Hello."_

" _Hey, Peter, what's up?" the voice of Quagmire was at the other end said. Peter smiled._

" _Hey Quagmire, my family and I are just going on vacation."_

" _That's cool," the voice was then silent for a second, "hang on a second, there is some fat ass in front of me who's driving to slow. Move it you jerk!"_

 _Suddenly, several honks were audible for all those in the car. Peter frowned._

" _Sorry Quagmire, some stupid asshole behind me is honking his horn."_

" _Oh you should totally flip him off."_

 _Peter did so, only to hear a gasp from Quagmire._

" _This fat ass in front of me just flipped me off! Oh up yours you jerk!"_

 _The car began to inch closer to Peter's car, beginning to honk more rapidly._

" _Hang on Quagmire; I got to kick this guy's ass."_

" _Yeah, I got to kick this guy's ass."_

" _I'll call you after the fight."_

" _Thanks."_

" _Good luck in your fight."_

" _Good luck in yours."_

 _Suddenly both cars stopped, and in complete anger fueled blindness, Peter and Quagmire pounced on one another, causing Lois to slap her head in frustration._

 _(End Cutaway)_

* * *

 **Leshawna:** If that was just the way that Peter normally acts, than the poor tike and dog are going to need therapy.

 **Stewie:** Too late, already need it. I needed it after that time I read that auto-biography of O.J. Simpson. I mean, he even turns his confession into a book, and no one tries to convict him. God sometimes political correctness is a disease on our nation. Like Rosie O' Donnell.

 **Peter:** I haven't felt this excited about driving since the 1970's.

* * *

 _(Cutaway)_

 _Peter is driving a group of teens in his van._

 _"So," he asked them, "Why do you want leave Washington again, Mr. Bundy?"_

 _"Oh no reason," Ted Bundy said, as he twirled a knife in his hand._

 _"Well then, I guess you just want to get away from your life in your home town."_

 _"You could say that."_

* * *

 _(Group three)_

"Oh, I'm a great driver, let me at the wheel," Caitlin said excitedly. Heather sneered.

"Yeah right," she said, "I'm the most mature one here, so I drive."

"Aw," Izzy, for some reason dressed in a bus driver out fit, slammed her hat to the ground, "I wanted to drive."

…

"Izzy," Lindsey asked, "why are you dressed like a bus driver?"

"No reason."

"That's what I thought."

* * *

 _(Group four)_

"This is going to be awesome," Harold said as he pumped his fist, as Ezekiel buckled himself nest to Harold in the shot gun seat, "An all Bass team. And we have our ace Jack; we have this thing in the bag."

"Bleach!"

Harold turned to see Ezekiel vomiting out of the window. Dib and Morty looked strangely from the back seat.

"Why'd you throw up, we haven't even started driving?"

"Because I just realized where ever Jack is," Ezekiel said with a sickly look, "Izzy is sure to follow."

"Aw come on," Harold moaned, "You get a hot girl to really like you, what's the problem?"

"I thought it was okay until she started to spend every night under my bed."

* * *

 _(Cutaway)_

 _Ezekiel was calmly sleeping in his bed, snoring softly. Slowly, Izzy's head edged out from below his bed._

" _Psst," Ezekiel woke up with a start when Izzy whispered to him, "You asleep yet."_

" _Um," Ezekiel, pulling the covers closer to his head whimpered, "no."_

" _Just checking," Izzy slowly retracted her head back under the bed. This creepy motion caused Zeke to shake with fear._

 _(End Cutaway)_

* * *

"I haven't been able to sleep since," Ezekiel said sadly, while the others just stared at him strangely.

* * *

 **Harold:** Now I understand why Ezekiel was upset. If Izzy is really that creepy to him, he has to be worried. Next to Ezekiel, the person that Izzy spends the most time hunting on the island is Jack. I can only hope that we can win this challenge fast, or who knows what could happen to us.

* * *

 _(Group five)_

"This is going to be so awesome! Woo Hoo!" Owen shouted, as he sat in the back seat. He began to laugh, until, a small fart escaped him. "Oops." He farted again.

His teammates, who were for the benefit of their own health, on the outside of the car, looked at each other.

"Do either of you have a driver's license?" Jude asked his teammates.

"Jude," Jen said exasperatedly, "you know I couldn't pass that test for the life of me."

"What about you, Reaper dude?'

"Sorry Mon," the skeleton explained, "Mine expired with FDR."

Jude and Jen glanced at one another.

"Dude, isn't that joke in bad taste?" Jude asked the king of the undead.

"I'm the Grim Reaper for Pete's sake, I don't really care!"

"Well," Jude said, staring at the car, "looks like I'm driving. Now all that's left is for us to pick who sits in the front," he then in dramatic fashion, raised up his arms like he was holding a cloak over his face, "and who sits next to Owen!"

"Shotgun," Jen said fearfully, causing Grim, Shake, and Early to stare in horror at the back seat, where they were doomed to sit next to Farticus Maximus himself.

"No please! Anything but that!"

"Sorry dudes, she did call shot gun," Jude said as both he and Jen sat in the front seats safely, as Grim and the others walked like they was going to an execution. And not the ones Grim was just watching and laughing at.

* * *

 **Jude:** I didn't want to force any one to have to sit with he who farts a lot, but Jen did call shotgun, so sorry you guys. Hope you realize it was nothing personal.

 **Grim:** _(Holding a piece of paper)_ Hum, I wonder if there's any rule against killing people for using the shotgun rule to make you sit in the back seat _(Angrily slams paper to the ground)_ Darn It!

 **Owen:** Seriously, I'm not that bad am I? _(Farts)_

 **Andrew:** _(Wearing a gas mask)_ Yes, Yes you are.

* * *

 _(Team six)_

"So apparently were stuck in the same car for the next few days together," Bojack said, as Double D slowly started to rev up the car, but was having some trouble. As the gas continued to fail to start, the entire group began to become agitated.

"Here let me try wuss," Bender grumbled as he reached over from shotgun, turning the key. But even he put his full strength into it; the gas would not start up. Even the loveable Ed was now glaring at the key.

Snap

The entire car grew wide eyed, as they saw the key snap in half. They all turned their heads to Bender, who looked sheepish.

"Great," Bojack said, "Now how the hell are we supposed to get to Pittsburgh?"

"Oh I know!" Ed shouted, slamming his feat through the floor.

"NO ED!" his teammates screamed, as they suddenly felt the car be lifted above the ground. Ed started to laugh, as he carried the car from the parking lot.

"So," Bojack turned to Double D, who was pinching the bridge of his nose, "This happen often?"

"You have no idea."

* * *

 **Edd:** Look, Ed is my friend. But, even I can see some of the problems about him. Like his smell, his disheveled way of wearing his clothes, his tendencies to slam around a room with no care for what damage he causes. _(Pulls out a list)_ This might take a while.

* * *

 _(Group seven)_

"Well this will be so awesome," Geoff said, as his team walked to their car. Gwen nervously stared at the ground as she walked up behind the other members of her group.

* * *

 **Gwen:** Look, I know I and Geoff have this weird vibe going on, and that's great. Unfortunately, I don't really know any of the others. It's going to be a little hard to adjust to a group made completely of the Bass team.

"So who's going to drive?" D.J. asked as they looked inside the car.

"Well we all have a license," Geoff began, "Why don't I go first, then Gwen, D.J., Rick, Bridgette, and Courage on rotation."

"That makes sense," Bridgette said as she got in the back seat.

"This way, no one will get sleepy when they drive," Geoff smiled as he opened the door to the driver's seat, "plus we can drive through the night, which will make this trip go much faster."

The six all got in the car, and began to back out of the parking lot, when Geoff began to turn on the radio. As he suddenly turned it onto a Rock music channel, Gwen covered her ears.

"We're not listening to that," she said as she turned to a metal station. Bridgette shouted in agony, before reaching up from the back seat.

"We are not going to listen to this either!" She turned the station to new age music.

"WE ARE NOT LISTENING TO THIS!" her teammates screamed, before Courage then smashed the radio with a mallet.

They all looked at one another.

"So…" Geoff began, "Any one up for eye spy?"

"Fine," Gwen groaned.

"I spy with my little eye something that is gray."

"The road?"

"Right!"

Gwen slammed her head into her lap.

"This is going to be a long road trip."

"Amen to that, sister," Rick said as he took out his flask.

* * *

 _(In a room full of computers)_

"Hello," Andrew says, as he rolls in on a rolling desk chair. He then turned to a young boy working the computer.

"Is everything working out okay Jimmy?" Andrew asked the partially disabled boy.

"I don't understand-nd why I have to-o do this pr-pro bono," Jimmy stuttered.

"I am allowing you to stay at the resort pro bono, aren't I?"

"Yeah, after your mi-missile blew up my home town."

"Blame Chris for that, now get back to working kid," Andrew then turned back to the camera, "Here is home base, where we will be giving you the highlights of the trip, because if we showed you everything, the author would have to abandon this fic for being to long and annoying."

"You jack-ass! You just br-broke the fourth wall!"

"As I was saying," Andrew continued, "Prepare for the next episode to have lots of traveling, gags, and people getting their asses whopped. Sayonara until then."

* * *

 **Double D:** _(still reading from paper_ ) his lucky smelly cheeses, his horror movie obsession (Flips paper) His sponge collection, the fact that his tub is full of gravy, the fact that he is bipolar, his refusal to even touch soap...

* * *

 **Losers:** _Courtney, Zim, Noah, Eva, Sadie, Justin, Billy, Rusty, Trent, Cody, Beth, Wyatt, Katie, Homer, Ron, Frylock, Jonesy, Nikki, Tyler, Kim, Mandy_

 _ **AN: Finally done with this chapter. And let me tell you, this was no small feat. I had to arrange all the teams, figure out who is going to win, and then try to figure out how.**_

 _ **So yeah, I am starting to do a lot more chapters based on two or three per challenge. If I didn't do this, these long challenges would take weeks to come off the press. Unfortunately, this means that it takes longer to find out who has been voted off. With that said, I'll see you next time.**_


	25. Chapter 25

Chris: Last Time on Total Drama Island. The campers were sent a cross country road trip, all in brand new gas guzzling SUV's. Some of the groups worked well, others didn't. After some damage to a few of the vehicles, all the groups were on the road. Be prepared to get a look at the U S of A with us.

Will Ed stop annoying his teammates?

Will Izzy attack Jack and his group again?

And, for the umpteenth time, will Kenny ever live through a challenge?

Find out right here, on Total Drama Island!

* * *

 _(Cue theme song)_

* * *

 _(Team Three)_

"What do you mean we're lost!" Heather screamed. Yep, it was pretty much like that for our good friends in team three. They had chosen Caitlin to drive, and she had been less than useful on directions.

"Oh," Izzy said excitedly, "I can drive us out of this mess, just let me at that wheel, and-"

"No way psycho-horse beast," Heather said angrily. She accidently pushed Caitlin, causing the car to skid. The girls all screamed.

* * *

 **Izzy:** And she calls me a psycho?

* * *

 _(Group two)_

"Well! Kyle's mom's a bitch! She's a big fat bitch, she's the biggest bitch in the whole wide world. She's a stupid bitch, If there ever was a bitch, She's a bitch to all the boys and girls," Cartman sang, as the other members of team South Park covered their ears at the fat boy's song.

"How dare you fucking sing that?!" Kyle shouted angrily, "My mom just died, and yet you treat her like that?"

"Well," Cartman chuckled, "I really don't care. As far as I am concerned, I'm completely incapable of being punished now. Unlike old age-liar over here," Cartman motioned next to him, and Stan tried his hardest to keep his eyes on the road, "yep, lying on a government document, crossing the border without a passport…"

"You forgot about the part of me making you smash your head into the windshield," Stan smirked as Cartman looked at him strangely.

"Well, I don't remember that-AH!" Stan violently stopped the car, flinging the fat boy into the windshield. The other's smiled; Cartman really should know to always wear a seatbelt.

"Yes," Cartman said calmly as he got back onto the seat, "I do suppose I walked right into that one."

* * *

 **Kenny:** _(muffled so you need subtitles)_ I for a fact know what happens if you don't wear a seatbelt. Let me tell you, not pretty. _(Suddenly his eyes widen)_ Is this the first time I have ever been in here? Man, dying a lot sure takes up a lot of time.

 _(As if to prove a point, the door slams open, a bear pokes its head through and smiles at Kenny, before quietly raising its paw.)_

 **Kenny:** Aw shi-

* * *

 _(Team five)_

Grim was not enjoying his trip.

No, that does not even describe the horror he was enduring as he rode in the back seat of the truck. Unfortunately, Owen had been forced to snack on beans for most of the trip to the film lot. That of course meant that he was farting up a storm in the back seat.

And of course, his teammates in the front seat were no better. All they did was talk. Jude's constant "Dudes" were driving him up a wall. He needed to get some fresh air soon, or else the Grim Reaper would have to meet death. And it had not worked out so well the last time they had met.

* * *

(Cutaway)

" _Hey Grim," a demon with a blue beret said, pulling his friend to the side, "Is this guy a relative of yours?"  
_

 _Grim was shocked to see another skeleton standing there, holding a drink._

" _Hey," Grim cursed, "What are you doing, dressing up like me?"_

" _Well," Death began, "since you are now nothing more than the play thing of a couple of kids, they outsourced, and gave me half of your job in order to keep the rate of the doomed from overwhelming the system. Seriously, do you know how hard it is to make sure all the dead are all judge for their eternal resting place. We get so many runners now; we can barely keep up with just me and you. They have even begun to talk to the shinigami about using some of them for help."_

" _No," Grim said horrified, "The fact is that Japanese swordsman stabbing people is one of the worst ways to take care of the dead. Do you know how many problems would be made, poor innocent souls running from weird Asians speaking gibberish? It would be awful!" AHH!"_

 _(end cutaway)_

* * *

So, basically, his life sucked at the current moment. But it would be all worth it when he won his freedom and the hundred thousand dollars.

But that did not mean he was not pissed off when Owen let out another one of his farts.

* * *

 _(Team Four)_

It was pure luck that team four had been the first to cross the border.

I say pure bad luck that is.

"How the heck did we drive onto the St' Lawrence river?" Dib asked his compatriots as the paddled across said river.

"Just be glad we finally we got to the US," Morty said, as the finally got back onto the shore. He then realized something.

That the author enjoys torturing the characters.

"High ho silver, away!" Izzy shouted, as she led second place team three. She was wearing western gear, and possessed a shot gun. "I'm on this challenge to take what is mine, and slaughter a certain samurai."

Both Jack and Ezekiel's eyes widened, as Harold started to light the ignition. As the car began to start up, they noticed that team three was only a few hundred yards behind them. The car finally began to gain speed, as they were soon being followed very closely.

"Why must all of our challenges end up like this?" Jack asked solemnly, as buckshot passed over his head.

* * *

 _(Team Seven)_

"Wow," Gwen said with astonishment, "I can't believe that we actually made it out of Canada so easily."

The man guarding the border seemed to be ready for a long interrogation period when they had first arrived. Apparently some crazy red head had crossed without paying and killed several members of the RCMP with a shotgun when they had tried to stop her. So, they had beefed up all other border crossings. But, for some reason the man's skin paled when he looked inside the back seat, and he had just let them through.

Of course, none of Courage's teammates noticed him put away a green and purple monster mask. Courage turned to the camera and laughed.

"Well," D.J. asked, looking around, "What are we going to do for an hour?"

"We could-"Geoff suggested, before Gwen screamed.

"No more car games!" She shouted angrily into his ear. He began to slap the side of his head, trying to regain his hearing.

"So what should we do?" Bridgette asked. They all looked at one another for a second, before they could come up with an idea, they suddenly saw teams three and four fighting it our along the road. As the heard the cries of agony and cackles of madness from Izzy, the members of team seven looked at one another confusedly.

"Now we know why security was so beefed up, huh guys," Geoff said. The others could not help but nod.

* * *

 _(Back at Control room)_

"Welcome back into the control room," Andrew said happily, as Timmy worked behind him, "Do not worry, this is not another chapter cut off-"

"TIMMAH!"

"Okay, I'm sorry I broke the fourth wall again," Andrew said to the wheelchair bound kid behind him, "any who, we regret to inform you that we are already two teams down in the race. Teams Three and Four were eliminated after their vehicles suffered irreparable damage. So, now officially we have Team Seven in first place…"

A map with the United States in the back ground suddenly showed a Cowboy hat crossing the New York and Pennsylvania border,

"…Team Five in second…"

A skull appeared about halfway between the border and The Canadian border.

"…Team six in third…"

A foot appeared just behind the skull.

"…Team Two in fourth…"

A small poofball hat appeared about halfway between the foot and the starting position.

"…And finally Team One in Fifth."

A Baby bottle appeared just crossing the border into the US.

"So, we will now kindly return you to… OH my God what is that!" Andrew screamed, before suddenly the sloppy Joe monster jumped out and slammed into him. HE suddenly threw it to the wall, and pulled out a revolver. He shot the creature several times, causing it to scream.

"Alright, it's dead," he said to the camera, "We're not going to be seeing it again."

* * *

 _(Team Seven)_

"I can't believe we got here this quickly," Gwen said happily. They had not even been on the road for a day yet, and they were already in the city of steel. As the continued to come closer to the stadium, they noticed something. A strange low rumble was emanating from somewhere in the car. As they searched the car for the sound's location, they were surprised to see little Courage holding his stomach. Courage noticed their stares, and then started laughing.

"Its ok little buddy," Geoff said, "Once we get to the stadium; will go buy you some food."

"Yuck!" Bridgette said form the back seat, "Stadium food? That stuff is disgusting!"

"It's better than the shit I have to *burp* eat whenever I have to go off planet," Rick said.

"Hey, how about we stop here," D.J. said, as he pointed to a small restaurant. The place was known as "Le Quack's." Courage began to ponder where he had heard the name before, only to gasp when he saw his greatest enemy, the evil French duck!

"Le Quack, is back!" the duck laughed, before Courage suddenly grabbed the wheel and spun away from the joint, rushing into on coming traffic, causing the van to move back and forth, before Geoff finally righted the vehicle into the right lane.

"Okay, sheesh," Geoff said, "I know French Food isn't that good, but you don't have to spazz out like that little dog dude!"

Courage just sighed.

* * *

 _(Team Five)_

"At least we are making good time," Jude said, as he began to see the sun set, "But, since I am the only one here who can actually drive, maybe we should plan on stopping some place and, I don't know, sleeping."

"No can do," Jen said, "we have to keep moving, or else we will lose to teams who can split up the drivers times."

"But I've been driving for seven hours straight!"

"We all have to make sacrifices, I mean, look at Grim and Bart."

In the back seat, Owen had fallen asleep. This unfortunately caused him to lay on top of Grim and Bart. The shuttering under the large boy's girth, almost begging for his own life to be taken. Sometimes, it really does suck to be death.

"He's crushing ma kidneys mon!" Grim moaned, as Jude nodded. He understood that his situation could be far worse.

* * *

 **Jude:** So we stopped at a coffee shop and I loaded up on caffeine. This would unfortunately cause some unforeseen side effects.

* * *

 _(Team Six)_

Ed's laughter could be heard as he ran down the street, the base of the car carrying his companions bouncing around as he bounded down the interstate. While seeing a car in itself running down a highway would be weird enough, the really weird part was that it was actually passing cars.

"So," Double D said, as he passed out the meals they had just grabbed at McDonald's, "What do you all do for fun back home?"

"I pretty much just get drunk all the time," Bojack said.

"Basically the same for me," Bender added, while taking another swig of his beer.

"So, I don't suppose either of you have any idea what we could do to pass the time then," Double D sighed, before he suddenly heard his best friend speak.

"Oh, I know, let's sing a SONG!" Ed shouted, before he began to sing far out of key. The others to hold their ears in agony.

Of course, this caused them to take their eyes off the road, which meant that they did not see the turn appearing in front of them. This of course caused the, to run strait over the side, on hurtling off the highway. The began to crash into ledges as the fell off what was now apparent as being a very tall mountain.

They first hit a thorn-bush.

"It hurts my feet guys!" Ed moaned in pain.

Then a big horn ram.

"I do hope the poor thing is okay," Double D said.

"Maybe you should worry more about us than some damn stupid sheep!" Bender screamed.

Then they hit a fire hydrant.

"Who the hell puts a fire hydrant on a cliff edge?" Bojack asked, bruises covering his face.

Then a rare South American Condor's nest.

"Those things don't even live in the US!" Double D shouted.

Then a cactus.

"This is just getting ridiculous!" Fry seethed.

Then Fred Fredburger.

"Yes," the green monster said.

"He's not even in this freakin' story!" Bender yelled.

Then they finally landed at the bottom of the ravine, and looked around.

"Well at least that's over," Double D said. Eddy, Fry, Bender, and Bojack nodded. Suddenly, out of the rubble came Ed. He was holding two very large eggs in his hands.

"Eggs, eggs, eggs," the mono-brow said. The other five stared at him from their own positions of the wrecked car.

"You got that from the condor didn't you?" Double D asked, while Ed furiously shook his head.

"It wasn't my fault Double D!" Ed shouted, as they suddenly heard a cry from a bird of prey.

"Ed, you idiot!" Eddy shouted.

Double D slapped his forehead. Today was not a good day.

* * *

 _(Control Room)_

Andrew is silently reading a paper.

"Well folks, it looks like team six is out of the race," he said to the camera, "but don't worry, we will help save them from that condor." He suddenly turned his head towards a Latino man, who was standing in corner.

"Ramirez! Take out that Condor!" he shouted.

"Why do I always have to do everything around here?" the man sulked, before dejectedly walking to the door with a hunting rifle.

* * *

 _(Team Five)_

Jude was having a tough time keeping himself awake. He had already had several cups of coffee, and was fidgeting around his seat like no other. Even though they had already got the first clue, and where now on their way to Washington DC, Jude didn't think he could last much longer. He suddenly saw a vampire in front of them

"AAH!" he screamed, waking everyone up.

"What's wrong?" Jen asked.

"Vampire," he pointed out in fear, only for the others to stare at him in anger.

"Don't wake us up for that kind of crud mon," Grim seethed angrily, before he and the others laid their heads down again. Unfortunately for Grim, Owen farted, causing him to wake up gagging before falling to the floor of the car unconscious.

"He's right," Jude admitted, "I'm just tired, once the others get up in the morning, maybe we can stop for breakfast and get some z's."

Jude looked up and kept on driving. After several minutes, his eyes began to wean again, only for him to notice a giant ship in front of them.

"Okay, this is even more ridiculous," Jude said, "There is no way a ship could be in the road."

Five seconds later he had collided the ship.

* * *

 **Jude:** Well how was I supposed that there really was a ship on the road!

* * *

 _(Back at Control Room)_

"I'm back," Ramirez moaned, lying down on the coach with bruises covering his body, "never mess with an angry condor."

"Good thing your back," Andrew said, "Team Five is out too. Somehow than ran into Stickybeard's pirates and now the pirates are holding them for a ransom of over three hundred pounds of candy. Now Ramirez, go save those hostages!"

"Why do I have to do everything?" Ramirez asked in complete despair.

* * *

 _(Team Two)_

"Man this sucks," Cartman moaned. They had just left the hotel they had been resting in, and were already behind the better balanced teams One and Seven. "If only our dumbass driver didn't need to sleep, we wouldn't need to be in last place."

"Hey shut the fuck up Cartman!" Stan shouted, "at least I'm actually doing something to try to help us."

"Well," Kyle began, "seeing as how the past two sections have been just two groups each getting knocked out of the race, with Andrew sending some poor sap out to help them, I guess we can just expect the same for us! Though Kenny is probably going to die in the process." Kenny just glared at Kyle while the others shook their heads.

"Oh Kyle," Cartman said, "I think you just broke the fourth wall, and that can only mean bad things."

"Like what?"

Suddenly, another car swerved into the boys' lane, and caused the boys to fly off the road. They rumbled about the cabin, as suddenly, they hit a tree just off the road. The all got out of the car, looked around, and frowned.

"I can't believe this," Kyle shouted, "Ee get forced off the road, and now were out of the race too! What else could go wrong!"

They then heard wolves howl, as suddenly a large pack of the beasts ran up, grabbed Kenny, and ran off over the top of the hill again.

"Now Kyle," Cartman said definitively, "that is why Jews should not break the fourth wall."

* * *

 **Kyle:** Goddammit I fucking hate Cartman!

* * *

 _(Control Room)_

Ramirez walked back into the room, covering in scrapes and bruises, only for him to see Andrew.

"Let me guess, you want me to go out and save another group?"

"Actually, I was about to ask if you wanted Chef to handle this one," Andrew said happily, "but since you volunteered, Team Two is stuck in the woods, go fetch them."

"But-but-GOD DAMN IT!"

* * *

 _(Team One)_

"It's happening!" Stewie screamed in horror.

"What's happening?" Leshawna asked.

"The cut off," Stewie explained, "It's down to us and team seven, and lets face it, the way this story is going, we are probably going to lose knowing how Andrew operates."

"Aw, you have too low an opinion of Andrew."

 _ **Bang!**_

"Yeah, and that flat tire is really agreeing with you right now."

"Well looks like were out of the race," Peter said, as they got out of the car, "at least we can explore this quaint little town."

The group looked up to the sign, and Stewie smiled.

"Ah, Gettysburg," he said fondly, "such a wonderful place. So many lives lost just to prove to all that no man should live in bondage to another." He then turned to Leshawna, "your welcome."

"Excuse me?"

"Ya know, I'm just saying, we gave a lot for you folks here, so, I don't know…just enjoy what we gave up here."

-.-' "I don't know, considering the previous several centuries, maybe were about even."

"Yeah, yeah…No We gave more."

* * *

 _(Team Seven)_

The group happily drove up to the Jefferson Monument, where Andrew was smiling.

"Sorry guys, but everybody else has been eliminated, so your trip ends here," he told them, "So now, not only do you all get immunity, but you get to spend the next two days in Washington, relaxing and shopping. Oh yeah, run up the bill, it comes from Chris's salary."

* * *

 _(Wawanakwa)_

"How is it that the only time I appear in this chapter is when my pay is being cut!" Chris angrily asked a nearby TV camera."

* * *

 _(Washington)_

"Now enjoy your time here," Andrew said happily, "I'm just going to have to handle giving out the marshmallows."

He left in a helicopter as they celebrated, happy about being safe in a city again.

* * *

"Who wants marshmallows?" Chris asked, as he walked back out on the plaza, "a delicious treat, and one that keeps you on this island."

"We already know the rules, why do we keep having them announced to us?" Duncan asked.

"Because it helps any new viewer who hasn't seen an episode before."

"Now lets start with…Jude."

Jude pumped his fist as he ran up to grab a marshmallow.

"Jen, Heather, Leela, Kyle, Kenny, and Stan!"

The four still living members all ran up and grabbed their marshmallow. Owen then ran up and as per usual, ate what was supposed to be Kenny's marshmallow.

"Bender, Leshawna, Peter, Brian, Stewie, Duncan."

All five grabbed their marshmallows.

"Cartman, Jack, Dib, Morty, and Harold."

They too grabbed their marshmallows.

"Bojack, Double D, Eddy, Fry, Ezekiel, Bart, Early, and Grim are the final members of the camp to have not received any votes."

They all got their marshmallows, and all eyes focused on the four who had votes. Of course, with Courage, Geoff, Gwen, Rick, D.J. and Bridgette were all in Washington and immune. This left Owen, Caitlin, Izzy, and Ed with votes.

"I will now reveal those who are left by starting with those who had the least votes."

"First one safe is…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…Owen"

"Darn it!" Grim shouted angrily, as Owen grabbed his marshmallow greedily.

"Second to last member left, is…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…Ed"

"I don't believe it," Bender seethed, as Ed grabbed his marshmallow. Double D glared at him angrily.

* * *

 **Double D:** I cannot believe Bender, he just is angry because he got hurt by Ed. I get hurt everyday, and you do not see me complaining.

* * *

"And now, the final marshmallow is about to be given out…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…Izzy."

"What," Caitlin asked, "how could I lose."

"Sorry girl," Chris said, "You're out."

Caitlin sadly walked to the dock, boarded the boat, and took off to Playa da Losers.

* * *

 _(Earlier that Day)_

 **Izzy:** (pulls out a screwdriver) if Cartman can do it, than so can I. (takes several Izzy votes and switches in Caitlin votes, before bursting out laughing)

* * *

"Thus another episode of Total Drama Island ends," Chris said, "What will happen next time. What awful challenges will we make up, and what relationships will be formed. Find out next time on Total Drama Island!"

* * *

 **Losers:** _Courtney, Zim, Noah, Eva, Sadie, Justin, Billy, Rusty, Trent, Cody, Beth, Wyatt, Katie, Homer, Ron, Frylock, Jonesy, Nikki, Tyler, Kim, Mandy, Caitlin_

 _ **AN: In case you didn't know, The Death shown in the cutaway is the one from Family Guy. I hope you enjoyed this chapter.** **Thank you and good night.**_


	26. Chapter 26

Chris: Last Time on Total Drama Island. The campers were sent off on a trip through the US to win a reward. The seven teams began well, but it quickly became obvious that this was not going to be a long drawn out competition. Izzy knocked out both her and Jack's team, there were plenty of random crashes, and a new employee named Ramirez made his debut. In the end, Caitlin was voted off for her poor directional skill, a very spread out vote, and the fact that she has done so little as a character.

What type of torture do we have in store for our campers today?

Will Bender and Double D get over the tiff they had in the last episode?

Will Kenny ever live through a chapter?

Find out now, on Total Drama Island!

* * *

 _(Cue Theme Song)_

* * *

The campers were all sitting in the mess hall, attempting to eat the brown substance that was supposed to be scrambled eggs. The eggs were awful because D.J. had only gotten home early that morning, and Chef had made the eggs the night before.

"Man," Jude said while trying to eat his "food", "I really hope that we get some kind of food reward today, this stuff makes me want to heave."

"Um guys, a little help?" Ed asked, as his head had been stuck to the table with the substance that was supposed to be oatmeal.

"Oh man," Duncan laughed, "the dork can't even handle eating this stuff."

The doors suddenly flung open revealing Chris. He smiled sadistically as he looked over the stuck Ed. "GOOD MORNING CAMPERS!" he shouted into a megaphone, "I hope you all are enjoying breakfast, cause for the challenge today, you're all going to need all the strength you can get your hands on."

* * *

 **Izzy:** Sometimes, Izzy would just like to tear out his - _(We are sorry, but due to ratings in the US, we cannot air this tirade by Izzy, for it would scar all young children greatly)_

 **Peter:** Man, sometimes I think this show is a harder competition than trying to out fart Michael Moore.

* * *

 _(Cutaway)_

 _Peter was walking in a bathroom, and just as he was about to walk into the stall he saw that Michael Moore was walking in the stall adjacent to his._

" _Hey," Peter said as he entered the stall._

" _How's it going?" Moore answered, as he too entered his stall._

 _They both pulled down their pants they sat down on their own respective toilets. At first, Peter farted once. Then suddenly, Moore also farted. Then Peter farted twice. Moore answered by farting three times. Peter farted four times, and then they both erupted in a two minute long song solely made by farts._

 _(End Cutaway)_

* * *

 **Izzy:** -EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP _(She makes a slashing motion)_ Have you ever felt like your entire speech has just been cut out from a take?

* * *

"Oh and Ed, Eddy, Double D," Chris smirked, "the challenge involves some old friends of yours."

"What?" Double D said, before Chris just threw something at him.

"Maybe this will jog your memory, he said, before leaving the hall, "toddles."

* * *

 **Gwen:** (Eyebrow raised) Toddles?

* * *

"What is it Double D dude?" Geoff asked his far meeker friend.

"It appears to be a case of," he showed the metal cylinder to his fellow campers, "lipstick. Now why would…" Double D's eye's widened, "oh dear." He then dived under Geoff's hat, and began to quake.

"K-K-Kankers!" Eddy screamed in terror as he hid under the table with Double D too.

"What's with the weasel and no-neck?" Duncan asked, "They're even wimpier than usual.

"Hiya Ed."

The campers turned to see two girls standing next to the table that Ed's head was stuck to. One had blue hair that covered one of her eyes, and a black tank top. The other had a red polka dotted tank top and a large orange perm.

"Well that's it for me," Ed said solemnly, as the girls lifted up the table.

"Your coming with us," the girl with blue hair said, as they began to carry the table, and Ed along with it, out the door.

"Ooky Dooky ladies," Ed said, before waving to his fellow campers as he exited the mess hall, "Um, see ya guys! A lesson in life I am sure to get." Once they were outside, they heard Ed give out one last one-liner. "Yep, I have seen better days!"

After several seconds of merely staring at the door where Ed and the still unknown girls had just exited, Harold finally spoke up. "Um," he asked, "Does anyone know who those girls were? Or even why they just carried Ed off like a stuffed pig?"

"They're the Kanker Sisters," Double D squeaked from under the hat, "they tortured Ed, Eddy and me when we were still at the cul-de-sac, and they will stop at nothing to make us Eds their," he shuddered, "husbands."

"Way to go dude," Geoff congratulated the sock-hated kid.

"No, not way to go," Double D said, "their definition of husband is slave who does all the laundry and works to pay for their living."

"And that's why we hired them."

No one was surprised when Chris reentered the mess hall. Everyone glared at him. "They are your next challenge, trying to defeat them and rescue Ed."

"First rule of the challenge," Chris began, "Ed is automatically safe from this weeks vote." This caused several of the campers to complain until they heard Ed's cries of sorrow off in the distance.

"Rule number two," Chris raised a second finger, "the first camper and or group of campers to save Ed automatically win immunity." All the campers nodded at this, sure of their ability to accomplish it.

"Rule number three," Chris said, this time looking at Grim, Rick, Bender, Duncan, Stewie, Early, Izzy, and Jack, "No use of lethal force is allowed." All of those campers looked slightly less confident after that restriction while Bender flipped Chris the bird.

"And finally," Chris put his hands behind his back, "if somehow Ed is not saved from those girls, than all of you go to the campfire ceremony." Again, all of them glared at Chris, who just smiled sadistically.

"So good luck," Chris said, "but, just so you know, I but five hundred on all of you coming to the ceremony tonight." He then left, with all their glares intensifying.

"I really fucking hate him," Stan seethed.

"So dude?" Kyle asked his fellow campers, "What are we going to do?"

"I say we go rush wherever they're keeping them," Duncan said while slamming his fist into his other hand, "what can three preteen girls do to stop us."

As Duncan led most of the campers on an assault out of the mess hall, Double D looked at Eddy, Geoff, Courage, Gwen, Rick, Morty, and Jack.

"So," Geoff asked, "ya got a plan?"

"Follow me," Double D said quietly, as he led his compatriots out to find some other type of assistance.

* * *

Ed was whimpering as the two older Kankers tied him upside down on a tree, with his shirt off. He felt the blood rush to his head, giving him enough brain power to attempt to bargain with the witches he was now dealing with.

"Um," he began, "set me free and I will give you my macaroni art."

"Aw," Lee Kanker said, "Bribery will get you everywhere you little scamp."

Suddenly, a third younger girl emerged from a nearby trailer. She had buck teeth and was smiling giddily at the captured Ed-boy. "It's my boyfriend!" she shouted, before she jumped on the poor lump and began to do horrible things.

This was the seen that awaited all of those who had not gone with Double D to find outside help. Some were horrified with the display, others were breaking down in fits of laughter, and still others were just perplexed.

* * *

 **D.J.:** Oh man, poor Ed. He was all screaming for help, while they just laughed and did weird things to him. It gives me the shivers. Those Kankers aren't very nice. In fact they're _(he struggles to say it)_ mean poop-heads! _(He then looks at the sky)_ sorry Momma.

 **Bridgette:** You know, continually forcing yourself on a boy is not a good way to get them to go out with you. _(She then taps her finger to her chin)_ the only person who can be a stalker and still get fans to root for her is Hinata from Naruto, and lets face it, she's so cute and innocent that she deserves the guy. _(Fist forms)_ Unlike that lousy little two-timing pink-haired bitch Sakura.

 **Jude:** I might feel a little sorrier for the Kankers if they didn't-ya know…tie up the poor guy. I mean they do genuinely like the Eds; they just are too forward about it.

 **Duncan:** _(is quietly whittling another skull with his knife, while he chuckles a bit. Stares at the camera, and in a beat, bursts out laughing)_

 **Heather:** _(is quietly filing her nails while chuckling. She then stares at the camera and bursts out laughing too)_

 **Kyle:** _(opens his mouth to speak, but closes it, before shaking his head sadly and walking out of the stall in embarrassment)_

 **Ezekiel:** Well at least he isn't in a slave girl outfit yet. Izzy can be far worse than these girls. In fact, _(we see Izzy looking in through the screen part between the roof and the wall)_ I wouldn't be surprised if she was watching me right now.

 **Harold:** You know, at least at my school, we nerds don't care what girl we got as long as we got one. So Ed at least knows when he goes to prom, there will be a girl for him to choose at last minute.

* * *

"Well," Duncan said while chuckling, "this has been a good laugh, but I would like to win immunity and take a nap soon, so I guess it's time to end this comedy show."

Duncan confidently stepped out into the clearing. "Alright," he said while pounding his fist into his open palm, "just let go of the lump and no one gets hurt." The Kankers stared at one another, before Lee reached into her hair and pulled out a-

"Tire iron?" Duncan asked fearfully, before Lee slammed the metal device on the punks head. Duncan walked back to the others in the woods with a large lump forming on his head.

"Jesus Christ, dude!" exclaimed Kyle.

"This is going to harder than I thought," he stated, before falling to the ground in a heap.

* * *

 **Harold:** _(Silently chuckles at the camera, before he bursts out laughing in a similar fashion to what Duncan did in his confession)_

* * *

As the Kankers continued to torture the poor simpleton, Harold and Ezekiel were beginning to put their own plan into motion.

"Are you sure I will be able to untie him while you distract those witches," Ezekiel asked.

"Sure, especially when they see my wonderful tricks from Magic Steve's magic camp!" Harold said confidently, before leaping out into the clearing in front of the Kankers, conveniently dressed in his scout outfit.

"Hey!" he shouted to the evil girls, "Want to see an official, international magic trick?" He then pulled out a deck of cards, and began to shuffle them.

"Is this guy for real?" Marie asked Lee, who were the only ones actually watching Harold do his trick.

"I don't know," Lee admitted, "but he is wearing a uniform."

"Dreamy," Marie said, as she walked up to get a better look.

Ed was currently being forced to bite May's ears, causing him to cry in disgust. Suddenly, Lee grabbed May and dragged her younger sister to watch the man in "uniform." This left Ed unattended, and suddenly, out of the bushes appeared Ezekiel with a small pocket knife.

"Zeke! My rescuer has arrived!" Ed shouted happily. Zeke ducked back into the bushes fearfully. Luckily, the girls ignored Ed and continued to watch Harold. However, when Zeke again came out and began to cut the rope, Lee noticed something.

"Hey!" she shouted, grabbing Harold's wrist, which caused several cards to fall out, "this guy is cheating us." She then hurled Harold to the tree where Ed was tied up, causing them to notice Zeke.

"Hey!" May shouted angrily, before grabbing both of them, and throwing them both deep into the woods.

"Come back when you actually can do magic trips!" Lee shouted out to the beaten nerds.

"Well, that was pointless," Bojack muttered.

* * *

 **Harold:** _(Holding an icepack over his head)_ Yeah; that could have gone better.

 **Ezekiel:** _(in a sling and has a black eye)_ this is the last time that I ever listen to one of Harold's schemes.

* * *

"So," Noah said, as he calmly flipped a page in his book, "you Double D and Eddy, are going out of your way to find Rolf and Johnny so they can help you free Ed. Something that could actually be considered unfair, and thereby cheating?"

"I suppose when you put it that way," Double D said apprehensively, those who had followed him looking on in doubt standing behind him, "yes. You wouldn't tell Chris and have me disqualified would you?"

"Ya know," Noah said while chuckling, "I'm going to go get them, just so it will annoy Chris."

The campers sighed happily, knowing that they had completed one of the hardest stages of their plan.

* * *

"Peter this is a bad idea, especially after the last two times you tried it," said Brian.

"Yeah, Fat man, I may hate you, but I don't want you to die," Stewie said, "and if you go through with this scheme of yours, um a, you just might."

"Quiet Stewie," Peter said as he tied himself to the rocket he had some how procured, "Once you light this puppy, I can move so fast that those Kankers won't be able to stop me from saving Ed. Now light it!"

Stewie sighed, finally lighting the rocket. Unfortunately, the rocket just zoomed off into the sky, never even coming close to Ed. As the other campers looked on in despair, Stewie just waved them off.

"Pfft," he said, "he'll be back by dinner time."

* * *

 _(Stoolbend, Virginia)_

Peter and his rocket suddenly collided with a nice white house, causing its front to fall off. Suddenly, revealed to the world was Cleveland Brown, who was predictably taking a bath in his upstairs bath room.

"What the hell!" Cleveland shouted, before he noticed the floor below him was sliding.

"No, no, no, NO!" Cleveland screamed, before the tub he was in landed right next to Peter, leaving him naked.

"Oh hey Cleveland," Peter said, before realizing what had just happened, "so…looks like were going to be going through that old gag again, huh?"

"Can't even take a bath in Virginia," Cleveland muttered angrily.

* * *

 _(Back at the trailer)_

"Prepare Kanker Sisters!" Izzy shouted from a tree branch, while holding a vine in her right hand, "You are about to meet your match, for you stand no chance against Izzy of the Jungle!" She then swung down on the vine, swooping near Ed, and nearly picking him up. Then, she inevitably had a back swing, and suddenly her face came into very close contact with a shovel.

"Man, where did Chris find these freaks?" Marie asked her sisters as she threw the unconscious girl into the woods. They shrugged in ignorance.

* * *

 **Izzy:** _(mumbling incoherently)_

 **Ezekiel:** I almost felt bad for Izzy. Almost.

 **Ramirez:** I really hope they save Ed; otherwise, I will have to!

* * *

"Rolf!" Double D shouted to his blue haired friend, "Help! Danger! Kanker Sisters!"

"What is wrong, Know-it-all Ed boy?" Rolf asked, "Have you lost the sticky notes?"

"Rolf," Double D explained, grabbing the taller boy by the shoulders, "Our friend Ed was stolen away by those evil Kanker Sisters, who have been hired by that cruel host Chris Mclean, and we need your help to save them!"

Rolf stared at them for a second, before he put his bucket of maple syrup down. "Is that so He-who-screams-at-the-tip-of-a-hat?" Rolf then jumped in said bucket of sap.

"Did Rolf just jump in that bucket of tree sap?" Morty asked.

Suddenly, Rolf appeared from a nearby tree, wearing a blue and yellow uniform.

"Fear not," he shouted, "For the Urban Rangers shall once again save the day!"

"Urban Rangers?!" Eddy asked incredulously remember the last time he had to deal with them. Rolf the pulled out a megaphone, and began shouting gibberish into it. Before anyone could tell what was happening, both Johnny and Butters appeared both wearing uniforms similar to Rolf.

"Urban Rangers!" Rolf shouted to the two smaller boys, "Today we bury the hatchet, take the bull by the horn, approach the lion in his den, March up to the cannon's mouth, and face the music." The two looked at each other with knowing grins.

"But there is no badge."

This caused both boys to clamor out a protest, causing Rolf to glare them down. Geoff then turned to Double D questioningly.

"Just who are these guys?" the party boy asked the Ed.

"The Urban Rangers are a group of scouts who handle the problems presented to suburban life," Edd explained, "They are lead by Rolf, who leads the troop consisting of Johnny and another kid who lives in our cul-de-sac."

"Ah," Rolf said, "I see you noticed our newest member," Butters saluted the campers, "Ranger Butters has been inducted for his talents and is now a full fledged Urban Ranger."

"I can't believe that even Butters is good enough to get in even when I couldn't earn a single badge," Double D whispered sadly.

"Yeah, those guys are so full of themselves, I can't believe I even thought of joining those stupid has-beens," Eddy said irritated.

"And do not worry my compatriots," Rolf shouted to Johnny and Butters, "For if we complete this task, we shall receive the "FREEING OF THE FOOL PEWTER MEDALLION!" Rolf pulled several pewter awards out of his pocket, causing the boys to o and ah. As the Urban Rangers began to walk off to their destiny, Geoff began to follow them. Rolf smirked as he slammed the book into Geoff's face, causing him to fall to the ground.

"So sorry, he who-parties-like-old-disco-woman," Rolf said, "but this mission is for Urban Rangers only."

"Pancakes," Geoff giggled as Double D threw himself to Rolf's feet.

"Please let us help Rolf!" he begged, "Ed is out friend!"

Rolf thought this over for a minute.

"Rangers!" he called, "Retreat!" Suddenly both Butters and Johnny were back, and Johnny was holding a large book, "In order for muckworms to join the Rangers on a quest, the must be deputized."

"Do the eight of you swear to uphold the values of ranger-hood, or face the pain of one thousand smacks from a wet noodle?" Johnny asked the campers.

"I do so solemnly swear," Double D said, as the others also put their hands on the open page. Then suddenly Johnny closed the book forcefully, causing them to cringe in pain.

* * *

 **Gwen:** (her hand is in a cast) never agree to a ceremony that you don't know what will happen in it.

* * *

"Okay Lindsey," Heather said slowly, "Here is the plan. You go and distract the girls, while I untie the big lump."

"How is that any different than Harold's plan?" Lindsey asked, before Heather tossed the blond out into the open.

* * *

 **Heather:** Okay, so I was a little harsh in doing that to Lindsey, but hey, I need to worry about myself, and besides, I was sure Lindsey would have all of her limbs in the end.

* * *

"What do you want?" Marie asked Lindsey threateningly. Lindsey began to look back and forth, before she noticed something.

"Oh wow," she said, running up to Lee, "I have never been able to get my hair to stick like that! How did you do it?"

"Oh," Lee said with surprise, "this, it's an old family recipe for hair gel."

As Lindsey began to speak with the girls about hair care products, Heather began to sneak towards the captured lump, she accidently stepped on a twig.

Crack!

"Oh hey Heather!" Lindsey shouted as Heather was hanging from Marie's iron grip, "I was just about to go styling with Lee. Have fun with Marie!"

Heather cringed as her world went black.

* * *

 **Lindsey:** (Hair curly) I have to thank Lee for that wonderful du she gave me.

 **Heather:** (covered in bruises) that girl can't even be a good distraction.

* * *

"Where the hell did we get this helicopter again?" Kyle asked his friend as they soared through the air in the helicopter. Hanging from a rope below it, was Kenny.

"You see," Stan explained, "our plan involves lowering Kenny until he is close enough to untie Ed, and then Ed will grab on, and we will lift him out of there."

Kenny began to lower himself towards the tree. He was however immediately noticed by the Kankers, who glared at him, and grabbed the rope that he was hanging from. She simply tossed him up, and he was sliced by the helicopter's blades.

"Oh my God!" Stan screamed, "They killed Kenny!"

"You Bastards!" Kyle shouted, as they flew the helicopter back away from the trailer.

* * *

"So…" Jude said, as he met with all the remaining campers, "any one else got a comical plan that will more are likely end up with one of us hurt?"

The entire cast just sighed and shook their heads, frustrated with the seeming impossibility of their task. Suddenly, they heard a rustling in the bushes, and saw Double D, Eddy, Jack, Geoff, Gwen, Rick, Morty, and Courage emerge from the foliage, followed by the Urban Rangers.

"Do not worry," Rolf shouted, "The Urban Rangers are here to save the day!"

As the Urban Rangers began to go into their positions, the foliage again rustled, as Peter reemerged, the beaten up rocket attached to his back.

"Sorry, what did I miss?" He asked.

"Just the obligatory Kenny getting killed," Stewie said.

"Hey dude," Geoff asked, as he inspected the rocket tied to Peter's back, "what does this button do?"

He then pressed said button, and again Peter was flying into the air.

* * *

 _(Stoolbend, Virginia)_

"Thanks fellas," Cleveland said, as he waved goodbye to the repairmen. Now again his upstairs bathroom was intact. He smiled happily, as he began to walk up the stairs to take a bath. His mustache bristled as he slid into the warm water, and he was about to pick up his magazine when suddenly, he heard a whistling in the air.

Wham!

"What the Hell!" Cleveland shouted, as he saw his freshly repaired house again torn apart. He then noticed the floor leaning.

"NO, NOO, NOOO, NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

"Hey Cleveland," Peter greeted his friend, "man, twice in one day, huh!"

"Peter," the black man growled, "you have five seconds to get off my property, or else," he suddenly picked up a shotgun, "I will shoot you."

"Wait Cleveland relax-"

"Five"

"Whoa, whoa, easy there!"

"Four"

"Let's not get violent."

"Three."

"Cleveland, aren't we pals?"

"Two"

"AHHH" Peter screamed, as Cleveland began to chase after him, firing buck shot at the fat man as they ran.

* * *

"Help me guys," Ed shouted out in fear, as the Kankers began to draw on him. Rolf silently moved toward the grill.

"Oh look at the horrible shape this grill is in!" he shouted, "The Urban Ranger shall clean it."

"Another man in uniform," Lee said, as the three Kankers once again diverted their attention away from Ed, and onto another man in uniform. Then Johnny and Butters both began to untie Ed.

"Hooray!" the big lump shouted, "I am saved!"

The two rangers dived back into the bushes, successfully hiding from the Kankers, who did not notice Ed. They then glared at Ed.

"You guys ever feel like you are going through Déjà vu?" he asked, as they again began to untie him.

"Were here to help you, you idiot," Johnny said.

"Help?" Ed said, "Good idea! I will distract them, while you go and get help!"

"No you idiot," Butters said, before Ed again burst out into song, gaining the Kankers' attention.

"Hey," May glowered, as she grabbed the two boys and threw them in the circle of evil girls.

"They have the exact same uniforms as this guy!" Lee realized, pointing to Rolf, who soon was also trapped, trying to think of a plan to escape.

"Rangers," Rolf whispered to his compatriots, "Implement evasive maneuver, code yellow."

The three then began to hold their bodies in pain, as though they were dying. As they spazzed around the ground, the each grabbed a flower. Then Plank, Johnny, Rolf, and Butters all laid down as stiff as boards, playing possum.

"Stay still," Rolf warned, "as they can smell fear."

"Get a shovel May," Lee ordered, "Looks like were having a burial tonight."

"Forget it," May said, running off towards Ed. Marie then reached out, and grabbed May by the shoulder.

"These guys are faking," she said as she pointed at the four rangers.

"I'm gonna wet my pants," Johnny squealed in a whisper.

* * *

 _(In the bushes)_

"Busted! Let's go." Eddy laughed as he started walking away.

"No!" Double D exclaimed.

"I said, let's GO!"

"Not without our Ed."

"If we get caught," Eddy said as he grabbed Double D by the head while making a fist, "you're gonna get this up the schnozolla."

"Thank you, Eddy."

"Um," Geoff asked Double D, "what do we do now?"

"Follow me," the smaller teen said, silently leading the group who had followed him out, with a wagon following them. Due to the Rangers distracting the Kankers, They were able to lift the tree he was tied to onto the wagon, and carry it off back to the main camp, winning immunity for Geoff, Gwen, Double D, Eddy, Rick, Morty, Courage, Ed, and Jack.

* * *

"Let's get these marker stains off you Ed," Double D said as he used a sanitation suit while hosing the lump down, "We wouldn't want that ink to stain."

"Did you guys miss me Double D?" Ed asked, as Morty and Geoff threw buckets of Soapy water on him.

"Of course we did Ed," Double D said sincerely, "now turn around please."

"Oh," Ed said, as he turned around, revealing a large bandage, "Watch my band-aid Double D!"

Double D stared at the bandage, before screaming, "Ed! What did those horrible Kankers do to you!"

"Oh, the Kankers didn't do this," he said, "I did that last week."

"Okay then, I am sure it must have healed by now," the smaller boy said, before pulling off the bandage, to reveal…a cookie?

"Yep," Ed said, as he ate said cookie, "I saved it."

"That is the most disgusting, irrational…" Double D began, before sighing and patting Ed's head, "it's nice to have you back Ed."

"I wonder if those rangers got their badge," Geoff said, as suddenly, a large shadow appeared above Ed.

"I really hope they got out o…dear," Jack said, as they suddenly saw what was happening to Ed. He was hogtied by Johnny and Butters, who were both covered by make up and in feminine outfits.

"Kiss your friend goodbye!" Rolf shouted, "For the disgrace on the heads of the Urban Rangers shall be avenged! Cowards!"

"That's it," Eddy said, walking back to the main camp, "I'm done!"

"But wait!' Double D shouted out, "wait Rolf, take Eddy instead!"

* * *

Chris smiled evilly as he walked into the campfire ceremony, a plate of marshmallows comfortably placed in his hands.

"Who-alright already," he said frustratingly, "we all know how this goes, if you don't get a marshmallow, you lose!"

"First up are our immune contestants, Geoff, Gwen, Courage, Jack, Rick, Morty, Double D, Eddy, and Ed!"

The nine all caught their marshmallows easily.

"Next to get their marshmallows are Stewie, Brian, Jude, Jen, Bridgette, and D.J."

D.J. high fived his friends, as they all also caught their marshmallows.

"Heather, Lindsey, Early, Shake, Meatwad, Stan, Kyle, Cartman, Kenny!"

They all also got their marshmallows.

"Leshawna, Harold, Ezekiel, Grim, Izzy, Bojack, Fry, Bender, Leela, Bart, Owen and Dib all also got Marshmallows!"

That only left Duncan and Peter. Both of them were unpopular in camp, so it was a toss up who would go.

"And the final marshmallow goes to…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…Peter"

"Yeah!" Peter shouted out happily, as he ran up and grabbed his marshmallow.

Duncan sighed as he walked out onto the dock, only for him to stop when Harold ran up to him.

"You know," Harold said, "you have been the biggest jerk I have ever met, and I have always wanted to do this."

Harold then pantsed Duncan.

Duncan then quietly slinked away, as the entire camp burst out laughing.

* * *

Geoff smiled, as he sat on the dock, looking out at the waves of the lake. This was the life. The biggest jerk on the island was gone, he had just won immunity, and Chris was now getting another pay cut. Plus, it had only taken one episode. Yep, things were looking good.

* * *

 **Losers:** _Courtney, Zim, Noah, Eva, Sadie, Justin, Billy, Rusty, Trent, Cody, Beth, Wyatt, Katie, Homer, Ron, Frylock, Jonesy, Nikki, Tyler, Kim, Mandy, Caitlin, Duncan_

 _ **AN: So Duncan's been eliminated, I figured it was time for him to go since I didn't have any other plans for him, but at least Harold go the last laugh in the end. I also want to thank everyone that reviewed for my fic. I really sometimes wish I got as many reviews as some of other Total Drama writers on their stories, since that is how we authors get our feedback. I can stand anything that is meant to be constructive, so please read and review. Yes, Rolf and other characters will be making more appearances.**_


	27. Chapter 27

Chris: Last Time on Total Drama Island! Our poor friend Ed was abducted by the evil Kanker Sisters, who proceeded to pummel any attempts at rescue by our campers. Whether by tire iron, shovel, misused rocket, or helicopter, all of the campers failed in their initial attempts to save the big lump. It was only when Edd and Eddy recruited the Urban Rangers that they finally saved their friend. In the end, it was Duncan who left, but not before Harold managed to get a little payback.

Will the Eds be safe from the angry Urban Rangers?

What has happened to Jack and Izzy?

And will Kenny ever live through an episode?

Find out now, on Total Drama Island!

* * *

 _(Cue Theme)_

* * *

"Damnit Chef!" Chris Mclean shouted angrily, "We came up with a great challenge last time, but our show was apparently too boring, and only a few big publications gave us reviews!"

"And even then it's just Hot-streak, Dork-stock, Wind, and Air," Chef sighed, "these guys review a lot. I mean, props to them, but I guess I have to agree with you, we need an even better challenge to get some of the more hard to get publications giving the episode a review."

"I know, but what?" Chris asked, before he heard a rummaging in the kitchen. The two sadists stuck their heads into the kitchen to see a small grey creature rummaging through the fridge. He turned to them, bit into the carrot in his hand, and in a Brooklyn accent, asked a rather unusual question.

"Eh…What's up doc?"

* * *

"Hey," Geoff asked at the next morning's breakfast, "where is Chef?"

The entire camp looked around, also noticing that the irritable man was not in the kitchen that morning. They also noticed that there was no food on the table, and, after several grumbles, picked the lock of the pantry, and were forced to eat a meal of beans, cheese, and smoked pork. As they chewed on what little they could gather up, the door to the mess hall burst open. In walked both Chef and Chris, each looking exhausted and covered in filth.

"Remind me to never go on a hunting trip with you again Chef," Chris said, before collapsing under his own weight. Chef merely nodded, before he also fell to the floor in a sickening thud. The campers gathered around the two, giving them questioning looks.

"Should we help them?" Double D asked his compatriots, causing everyone to stare at one another.

"NAAAA!" they all said in unison, leaving the two sadists to bleed on the floor as the campers finished up their meals.

* * *

 **Ezekiel:** Okay, so we left them there to bleed to death. After all they have put us through, can you argue that they didn't deserve it?

 **Grim:** I knew that they wouldn't die, so I just let them lie there for a while and bleed a little.

 **Peter:** Man, that was funnier that when I went to Mexico with Gary Coleman (Looks around, only to balk after a few seconds) Oh, we don't have a clip? Sorry, thought we had a clip.

* * *

After several hours, the campers finally relented, and took the two hosts to the hospital tent. After another few hours of simply letting them lay on stretcher beds, allowing the campers to relax for the morning, both Chef and Chris finally managed to get themselves into wheelchairs and came out to meet the campers in the amphitheater.

"Well," Chris said angrily with bandages covering both his left arm and right leg, "in light of your gross uncaring behavior about our well being," the campers snickered, "are now going to under go the same treatment we got," the campers gulped fearfully, losing their grins, "and have to catch that…"

"…Dog gone, long eared, son of cotton tailed, no good rabbit!" Chef shouted angrily. The campers looked at one another, before they burst out laughing again. The two injured men glared at the teens, allowing them to laugh themselves out. After around twenty minutes of laughing, the campers finally calmed down enough, and saw the serious looks covering the faces of Chris and Chef.

"Wait," Jude asked, "you're serious?"

"Damn right," Chef shouted, "that critter beat us up all night! Though at least now I know who has been stealing my carrots during this show. That kept me from making my mom's special carrot surprise." The campers all looked slightly relieved.

"So the challenge is to bring back that stupid rabbit alive!" Chris shouted, "I want to squeeze the life from that rodent myself. If you bring him back, you win invincibility."

The campers charged out of the amphitheater, only to rush back in a second later.

"Where is this rabbit living?" Jack asked.

"Just follow those rabbit tracks," Chris said, pointing to said tracks, going into the forest.

* * *

 **Geoff:** You'd of thought we'd seen those earlier.

 **Andrew:** I'm not getting in this episode (Blinks at camera) No seriously, I can tell where this is going, and I want no part of the sheer carnage that is about to overtake our cast, so (pulls out Hawaiian shirt) I'll be in Maui for the next few days.

* * *

"Guys," D.J. said, as he and Bridgette stopped walking with the rest of the group, "I know this is a challenge, but I and Bridgette have decided to take no part in it. We don't feel that it would be wrong to kill something just because it got Chris angry."

"Well if it isn't the two treehuggers standing up for nature again," Cartman sneered, "Well I guess I'll just have to leave you two hippies back here on your own."

As the others filed past D.J. and Bridgette, the two were shocked when Geoff, Courage, Double D, Morty, and Gwen were about to join them. The seven merely stood around each other for a moment, before D.J. finally asked them, 'shouldn't you guys be trying to win immunity."

"Nah," Geoff waved off D.J.'s concern, "besides, I smell a chance to humiliate Chris, and who doesn't like doing that?"

* * *

 **Chris:** I don't!

 **Chef:** I do!

* * *

"Um, guys," Dib said, as he followed Cartman, Bart, Shake, Meatwad, and Owen toward the rabbit hole, "Are you sure we will just be able to reach into the hole and grab the bunny? I mean you saw what happened to Chef and Chris."

"Well if you don't want to get invincibility, then you can just go hang out with those other goddamn tree-huggers," Cartman chastised, as he lead the three to be the first ones to reach the hole, it was covered in tracks made by large rabbit feet. Owen then reached in side the hole, and began to grunt as he stretched his arm.

"I can't seem to find the little critter," Owen moaned, before he suddenly was pushed aside by Cartman.

"Let me take a look!" he shouted, as he stuck his head into the hold, "Hey! The rabbit isn't in here! Just a bunch of nineteen-fifties furniture!"

"Oh," Owen marveled, "can I take a look?"

As the two idiots stuck their heads in the hole, from another hole not ten yards away, a rabbit appeared. He had long ears, a grey coat, and he was munching on a carrot as he walked up to the three. Dib and Bart, both being mildly smart, began to point frantically at the rabbit, but when Cartman and Owen stuck their heads up, they acted like the creature was a normal person.

"Aaahh," the bunny said with a Brooklyn accent, "what's up doc?"

"Were trying to catch a rabbit!" Owen said with a matter of fact tone, "we were just looking in that hole, when you came up."

"Um, guys," Dib said weakly.

"Well what do ya know doc?" the rabbit said stuck his head in and out of the hole, "there is a rabbit down there!"

"Where!" Cartman shouted as he pulled Owen and Dib back to look in the hole. This time however, all they saw was pure black darkness.

"Guys," Bart said annoyed, "did you notice anything weird about that guy? Like his long ears, buck teeth, or fuzzy tail?" He then raised his voice very loudly, "That was the rabbit!"

"You are absolutely correct! And now it is time to receive your grand prize!" the bunny shouted, before using a plunger to stuff all six down the hole, which was very squished considering both Cartman and Owen's girth. The rodent smiled as a cannon rose from the hole, and pointed out towards the lake, "a one way trip to Lake Wawanakwa!" He pulled the cannon's rope, sending the six soaring through the air towards the lake.

"And that is why you don't mess with Bugs Bunny," the rabbit laughed.

* * *

 _(Just off the Wawanakwa cliff)_

The six campers were plummeting towards the water, fearful of the landing. It was just like jumping off the cliff again. No wait, now there was no safety net, so the sharks were everywhere around the base of the cliff. And even worse, they were nearing a group of sharp rocks that jutted out of the water. They did not stand a chance, until suddenly, a blue-red flash appeared, and suddenly, the rocks were covered by a net. The three safely bounced on the net, avoiding the rocks and water.

"Wow," Owen said, "Thanks Spider-man!"

"This is your one, Cartman!" Spider-man said informatively, "And everyone only gets one. Tell him D.J.!"

Out of nowhere, D.J. appeared on a kayak.

"Yep," the Jamaican said, "Apparently, everybody gets one!"

"Bingo!" Spider-man said, before slinging off into the sunset, and D.J. paddled back to shore.

* * *

 **Bart:** Where the hell did he get that kayak?!

 **D.J.:** Chris left if floating around near the docks, so I thought I would go out on the lake to clear my head. (Rubs the back of his head) Guess it seemed pretty weird for me to just pop up like that when I am supposed to be somewhere else, huh?

* * *

Heather and Lindsey walked up to the hole, and Heather smiled as she pulled out a stick with a carrot attached to the end. "With this thing," Heather said as she lowered the carrot into the hole, "we really will get immunity this week!"

Suddenly, the rope began to jerk, as Heather began to battle the rabbit like a large fish. Every time it appeared she was about to win, the rabbit gave an extra burst of power, pulling the Asian girl back. In one particular pull, Heather smacked Lindsey back, causing the blond to go barreling into the woods. Heather continued to pull, until finally, she pulled a rabbit up. But this was not the rabbit she was looking for, oh no, this was a rabbit made of dynamite. Heather saw that nearly all the fuses were about up, and an explosion was imminent.

"My, my," Heather commented, "that rabbit has talent."

The explosion could be seen for miles.

* * *

 **Lindsey:** Good thing I fell back into the woods, or I would have lost my eyebrows like Heather did. She just ran back into camp, and said she isn't coming back to hunt for the bunny! I need help! (Taps her chin) maybe I should see if Chris would be willing to help me bring that rabbit in?

* * *

"I can't believe I agreed to help in another one of your plans," Ezekiel groaned, "Harold, do you really think we can just use a carrot and box trap! The last time I joined you, I got beaten up!"

"Take your pick," Harold said indignantly, "It's either me, or Izzy." Zeke looked over, and saw Izzy grin crazily at him. He slowly turned back to Harold.

"I'm okay with you," the prairie boy said sadly. He moved the box up so that Harold could put a carrot under the box. The two snuck off, and hid behind a nearby tree. The scent, somehow visible as an orange smoke, swerved in the air before entering the hole. Suddenly, Bugs began to float in the air, floating under the box and trapping himself inside it. Harold and Zeke ran up to the box, and saw Bugs holding both his hands in a fist on the ground, apparently looking at something in his it.

Harold leaned over, trying to get a better look at it. Bugs noticed this, and then with one hand still in a fist, holding what he was looking at, he pointed at the fist. When Harold nodded, Bugs nodded also.

POW!

Harold had been punched in the left eye, causing him to scream in pain. As the nerd ran off, Bugs jumped on Zeke and kissed him. The rabbit laughed as the prairie boy ran off screaming.

"Well that takes care of th-…" Bugs stopped, as standing between him and the hole was a girl covered in inky black and fire surrounding her, "Yipe."

"How dare you kiss my boyfriend!" She screamed, "I am going to turn you into a fur coat!"

"Hey!" Bugs shouted back, "Them's fighting words!"

"Yeah!" She again screamed, "Them's fighting words!"

Bugs smirked as he made a line in the dirt.

"I dare you to step across this line!" the Rabbit shouted, only for the demon to do so.

So he made another line a few feet farther back.

"I dare you to step across this line!"

She did so again.

Thus Bugs made another line, and the cycle continued.

* * *

 _(Twenty Minutes later, on top of the cliff)_

Apparently, the cycle had continued indefinitely, as Bugs made another line, and Izzy stepped over it. The she-demon was losing her patience, and was about ready to strangle the bunny. She seethed as the rabbit made another line.

"Come on you stupid rodent!" the girl screamed, "I won't let you keep this up any longer!"

"Well I can assure you that this is the last line," Bugs said with a smirk.

"Well finally!" Izzy screamed as she walked over the next line. She smiled as she turned back to Bugs, who was grinning at her stupidly.

"What is with you?" she asked. Her response was Bugs cheekily pointing downwards. She scoffed as she looked down, and saw that she was actually standing on thin air above the drop.

"AHHHHH!" she screamed, as she tried to get back on the edge, only for Bugs to hand her an anvil.

"Bon Voyage-e!" he shouted, as Izzy fell into the lake. He then began to laugh as he pointed down after the falling girl. He slapped his knee, laughing even harder when he heard a loud splash when the girl fell in.

"He, he, he! What a maroon!" He turned back towards the shore, to see Ed charging up the hill, apparently also after him. Uh oh! Think fast rabbit!"

Just as Ed reached the top, he saw not a rabbit, but an Indian. Of course the big lug had failed to notice the grey fur of the Indian or the Indian's tail. The Native seemed to be spazzing, pointing off the cliff.

"Quick!" the chief said in a rather simplistic language, "Him go that way! Head him off it pass!"

"Thank you stranger," Ed said while shaking the Indian's hand, and running off the cliff. Bugs cheekily winked at the camera.

* * *

 **Bugs:** Ain't I a stinker?

 **Izzy:** I don't believe it, (raises arms in astonishment) that rabbit is screwier than me!

 **Ezekiel:** (Is washing his mouth out with soap) Rabbit Germs!

 **Ed:** Which way did he go George! Which way did he go!

* * *

"Ah," Bugs said as he munched on his carrot on his way back home, "I can't believe how easy this is! I mean I at least expected on of these campers to give me a dec-…" he looked down and realized that he was standing on top of a net. The net quickly flew up and around the rabbit, capturing the rodent in a snare. Jude and Jen both ran out happily. "Well here we go again," Bugs commented, as the two began to drag him towards camp.

"I can't believe we actually beat out the others for this!" Jen exclaimed happily.

"Now don't get too excited Jen," Jude warned, "This is usually when something bad happens and we lose our chance of victory."

"Don't be so…" Jen looked back to see the rabbit had sawed the net and escaped, "I can't believe I'm saying this, but want to just head back and forget about the challenge?"

"Music to my ears."

* * *

"Okay, you ready to shoot that thing Lindsey?" Chris asked, as he handed the blond a gun. He really wanted to kill that stupid rodent, and since all previous attempts by the campers had failed miserably, he decided to help Lindsey blast that sucker.

"Sure Craig," the bombshell said, holding up the rifle. Silently, the two snuck over to the rabbit, who was quietly sitting on a stump. Lindsey smiled, before placing the gun up to Bugs's head.

"All right you rabbit!" Lindsey shouted, "You're coming with me!"

"Okay doc," Bugs said, hiding his glee when he saw Chris walk up rubbing his palms together, "you got me. Now, do you want to shoot me now, or wait till you get home?"

"Shoot him now!" Chris demanded angrily, "Shoot him now!"

Bugs ran up to the host and said, "You stay out of this! She doesn't have to shoot you now!"

"Well I say she does have to shoot me now!" Chris shouted back, apparently not realizing what he was saying, "I demand that you shoot me now!"

Lindsey looked confusedly to the camera-man, who just shrugged. Lindsey then brought the gun to Chris's head while Chris was sticking his tongue out at Bugs.

BOOM!

When the smoke cleared from around Chris's head, it revealed that unfortunately, Chris's head had not been blasted off, and only his hair, which we are now comfortably assuming is a wig, slumped over his face. Chris calmly readjusted his hair, slowly made Lindsey point the gun downwards, and walked up next to Bugs.

"Let's run through that one again," Chris seethed.

"Okay," Bugs says, before entering a deadpan tone, "Would you like to shoot me now, or wait till you get home?"

"Shoot him now," Chris said in a similarly deadpan tone, "shoot him now."

"You stay out of this. She does not have to shoot you now."

"That's it, hold it right there!" Chris shouted happily, before turning to the camera, "pronoun trouble," he then turned his attention back to Bugs, "it's not she doesn't have to shoot **you** now, it is she doesn't have to shoot **me** now," Bugs continues to smile coyly, "well I say she does have to shoot **me** now!"

He ran up to Lindsey.

"So shoot me now!"

BOOM!

Chris calmly readjusted his hair, again having it shoot off by the confused blonde. He glared at the rabbit, who was calmly filing his nails.

"Let's try this from the other end," Chris said, eyeing the rabbit cautiously, "look; you're a hunter, right?"

"Right," Lindsey said happily.

"And the challenge is to get the rabbit, right?" Chris said again.

"Right!"

Bugs interjected quickly, "And if he was a rabbit, what would you do?"

"Yeah!" Chris exclaimed, suddenly furious, "Since you're so smart! If I was a rabbit, what would you do?"

"Well I'd," she pointed the gun at Chris again.

"Not again," Chris whimpered.

BOOM!

Chris had managed to catch his mangled hairpiece, which he again placed on his head. He turned around, and ran up to the rabbit with his finger pointing upward at the rabbit's jaw. Slowly, he realized he had been fooled, and pulled his hand back down again.

"Why are you trying to shoot me dock?" the bunny asked, "don't you know that I'm a fricasseeing rabbit? Do you know what the penalty of shooting a fricasseeing rabbit is, if you don't have a fricasseeing rabbit hunting license?"

"Oh brother!" Chris shouted angrily, before pulling out a piece of paper and beginning to write down something on it, "um…fr-hey rabbit!" Chris shouted to Bugs, "How do you spell fricasseeing?"

"F-R-I-C-A-S-S-E-E-I-N-G and C-H-R-I-S," Bugs spelled out calmly.

"There you go," Chris said as he handed the paper to Lindsey, "Don't worry about the fine print, just shoot what that line says you can shoot!" he yelled. Lindsey simply shrugged and pointed the gun at Chris.

BOOM!

Chris calmly grabbed the paper out of Lindsey's hands as he put on his wig. He began to mumble as he read, before sighing and turning to the camera.

"Well I guess I'm the goat."

Bugs raised a sign that read "Goat Season"

BOOM!

Chris again put on his hair, as he ran up to Bugs.

"You dirty dog!" he shouted furiously.

"And you are a dirty skunk," Bugs said calmly.

"I'm a dirty skunk?" Chris asked, as Bugs pulled out a sign that read "Dirty Skunk Season", "I'm a dirty skunk?"

BOOM!

"Brother," Chris said as he once again fixed his hair, "Am I a pigeon."

Bugs raised as sign that said "Pigeon Season."

BOOM!

"Look, Lindsey," Chris said as calmly as possible as he readjusted his hair for the umpteenth time, "what you need is some briefing."

* * *

"Um," Brian said as he stood next to Peter, who was once again putting on a giant rocket, "didn't you already try this like um…twice?"

"Shut up Brian!" Peter shouted to the dog, before explaining his plan, "Now once you light me up, I will be going fast enough that I will be able to catch that scwey wabbit! And then I will win invincibility!"

"I can already tell where this is going," Stewie said, as once again, Peter lit the rocket, and flew high into the sky.

* * *

 _(Quahog, Rhode Island)_

Surprisingly, instead of hitting either of Cleveland's houses, Peter actually hit the other side of the street, completely blowing away the front half of his friend Quagmire's house. Inside, Quagmire was hiding the body of yet another private investigator, this time a rather attractive red headed woman, that had been sent by city hall to investigate his rather infamous lifestyle. Currently, one could see the frying pan that he had used to bust open the woman's head, and was currently dragging it somewhere.

"Hey Peter," Quagmire said to his rather disheveled friend, "Um, not to be a bother, but could you close the door," he said pointing to a small door that was between the two, "I am going to need your help in a couple of minutes to get rid of this thing. But first I need to get a little fun out of it. Giggity Giggity!"

"He, he," Peter laughed, "WHO ELSE BUT QUAGMIRE!"

 _He's Quagmire, Quagmire!_

 _You never know what he's going to do next!_

 _He's Quagmire, Quagmire!_

 _Giggity Giggity! Let's have sex!_

* * *

Who will catch Bugs?

Will Kenny actually be able to survive this challenge considering nothing has happened in the first half?

Why am I asking you this, I am the author?

Find out next time! ON TOTAL DRAMA ISLAND!

* * *

 _(Omake!)_

Andrew smiled as the camera closed in on him. He was in a small room with a TV screen in the middle. He spun around in the chair, before he finally began to address the audience.

"I hope you have enjoyed the show as much as I have so far, but the fact is that we have a new season in line soon," he said calmly, "So here is a look at some new contestants that will be among those who compete in Total Drama Action!"

 _(New Contestants Tape #1)_

"Hello there," a young boy, no older than nine said to a camera as he kept the camera on his face, "My name is Mac, I always wanted to get on a reality TV show, and this show looked really cool. So, to get on, I thought I'd show some of the people I hang out with, and hope that you will choose us to come onto your show."

He opens a door, and points the camera away from him. It shows a red headed teen girl standing there, reading from a clip board. She notices the boy, and smiles.

"Hey Mac," the girl greeted, before grimacing at seeing the camera, "please don't tell me you have another video project for school."

"Nope," Mac said, "Just a chance for us to get on the next season of Total Drama!"

"Wow," Frankie said, losing all apprehension, "a reality show, we need to get on!"

"That's why I brought the camera here," Mac continued, as the two began to walk up some stairs, "We need to find Ed, Wilt, Coco and Bloo."

"Don't worry, they are in there room," the girl said, before opening a door, and revealing three strange creatures. The first was a little blue blob that was hopping around the room. The second was a strange creature with a beak, a tree for a head, and an airplane for a body. The third was a big purple monster that was hugging several stuff animals. The final weird thing was a tall red man with a big number one stitched to his chest.

"Mac!" the four shouted, as they ran towards the boy, "we were wondering when you would get here!"

"Well, we need to show off a little if we are going to get brought in guys, so what do you say we all do a small personal interview, and then we send that in one tape."

"Sounds good."

 _(Back in studio)_

"There you have it," Andrew said, "we will begin with Mac's tape first next week, on Total Dram Island!"

* * *

 **Losers:** _Courtney, Zim, Noah, Eva, Sadie, Justin, Billy, Eddy, Trent, Cody, Beth, Wyatt, Katie, Homer, Ron, Brian, Jonesy, Nikki, Tyler, Kim, Mandy, Caitlin, Duncan_

 _ **AN: Bet you weren't expecting that character to appear, this shows that characters from other shows that appear in this story won't be limited to ones competing on the show. Hope you enjoyed all of the old school humor. And don't worry, in the end, Bugs will always, always come out on top. Just expect some rather painful moments for our favorite sadists, and yes I mean Chef too. I will try to update as quickly as possible, and the Fosters Gang will be making it onto the next season along with other crossovers and current characters. I hope you are all looking forward to it as much as I am!**_

 _ **See you later!**_


	28. Chapter 28

Chris: Last Time on Total Drama Island! A screwy rabbit started ruining my good time. First he stole all of the carrots in camp, and then when Chef and I attempted to bring down that little critter, he humiliated us. Luckily, I was brilliant enough to assign the campers the rabbit's capture as a challenge. Unfortunately, they sucked hard, getting blown away in a cannon, tricked into walking off a cliff, and blasting yours truly with a freaking shotgun. Seriously, how stupid do you have to be not to realize that you are supposed to shoot the rabbit, not the freaking host?

 _(Bugs appears and holds up a sign saying "Host Season". This causes Lindsey to run in and blast Chris again. He then again readjusts his hair and coughs)_

Anyway, will we finally catch that rabbit?

Will I avoid getting humiliated again?

And does Kenny really have a shot of living through this episode?

Find out now, on Total Drama Island!

* * *

 _(Theme Music)_

* * *

"Well now that that host and blondie are gone," Bugs said as he was walking through the forest, "All I have to do is deal with that bag of bones, The Albert Einstein knock off, the fella with a top not, and possibly that red headed beast." Bugs simply thought about it, "Maybe I better look these guys up just to be sure."

He pulled out a small book let that's title read, _"Your Total Drama Cast."_ As he searched through the book, he did not notice an orange tornado devouring the forest. He than began for no apparent reason to read out loud. "Izzy Fitz-Patrick, the most dangerous of all the campers on the island. She is noted for being the most wanted person in Canada, for such crimes as desertion, stalking, and murder of the following species: humans, elephants, deer, caribou, bears, lions, tigers, koala, gators…um oh that is just nasty…she killed a what, a blue whale…hey, there are no rabbits in this thing." He then noticed a hand reach out with a pen and right Rabbit in big bold letters on the top of the page.

"Okay rabbit," Izzy cursed, "Since you think your so funny, why don't you dance before I kill you." She pulled out a revolver and began to fire it at Bug's feet. "Dance!"

Bugs began to do a little jig, not un-similar to the one he did when a certain red headed cowboy attacked him. Then, he tried to sneak away, causing Izzy to fire a shot and make the rabbit continue dancing. After several moments, Bugs finally stooped.

"Take it girl!" he shouted, causing Izzy to dance in a similar manner to what Bugs had earlier. After finishing the dance, she danced to the left, and directly into one of Bugs's holes. Bugs smiled as he began to walk away from the hole.

"And that is…" he stopped when he noticed Izzy, this time in full demon form, standing next to him.

"I'm going to make you suffer," she growled, while leading Bugs up the mountain to the cliff. As they stepped onto the cliff, Bugs noticed a plank hanging from the side.

"So you want me to walk off that plank?" he asked the insane girl. When she nodded sadistically, Bug's shrugged, and stepped on the plank, and began to march to the end. Izzy also stepped on the end, dressed in stereotypical pirate garb. Bugs smiled. "One for the money," he said as he began to bounce up and down, "two for the show, three to get ready, and four to GO!" he shouted as he threw all of his weight into the last bounce, catapulting the red head off the cliff.

"Bon Voyage-e!" he shouted, as the girl fell again into the lake. He began to walk back to his hole, when he noticed a very familiar pair.

"Well here we go again."

* * *

"Now remember Lindsey," Chris instructed the girl while handing her a shotgun, "just shoot the rabbit, one we get through that, everything will be fine."

"Okay Chip!" she shouted, as she ran out, and fired a bullet, blasting "Bugs" into tiny pieces. As she stared at the remains of the rabbit, which looked suspiciously like leaves and twigs. Suddenly Bugs, in pure white clothing and a small metal halo, floated down from a rope in the trees.

"How's life doc?" he asked her. Chris slapped his face when he saw that Lindsey was attempting to apologize.

"Oh I hope it didn't hurt too much Mr. Rabbit," she said, while Chris ran out angrily.

"I can't believe this!" he shouted in a fury, "if he is dead, well than I am a mongoose!"

Bugs held up a sign reading "Mongoose Season."

BANG!

Chris angrily readjusted his hair, and grabbed the gun. "Just get out of here!" he shouted at Lindsey, who sulked back to the cabins.

"Well that wasn't very nice doc," Bugs said, only to begin to run away as Chris chased him. As the two ran for several hundred yards, Bugs noticed something.

"Hey doc," he said to the crazed host, "what do you say we settle this like adults, and talk it out?"

"Yeah sure," Chris said, as he aimed the barrel at the rabbit, which sighed, and spun the gun barrel to the side, causing the barrel to become perpendicular to the rest of the gun. Chris tried to fire again, only for bugs to spin it to the opposite side from before. As Chris prepared to take another shot, Bugs spun the barrel vertically, not stopping until Chris caught it.

"Ha!" Chris laughed, until he suddenly realized that Bugs was throwing the gun-sight up and down in his hand. Chris looked down in fear; he could no longer tell which end of the barrel was which. Slyly, he turned around the barrel, and pulled the trigger.

BOOM!

And once again, his hair had been blown off by the blast.

"That is it!" he shouted in a fury, "I am done with this, I'll just let those stupid campers bring you in!"

Bugs laughed as he saw Chris walk away. Bugs smiled, before remembering something. "I wonder what ever happened to that vicious, snarling, disgusting, frightening monster of a red haired girl."

"Flattery will get you nowhere."

Before Bugs realized it, he was knocked over the head by a lead pipe, and a cackling Izzy carried off the unconscious rabbit, leaving his fate to chance.

* * *

"Um," Bugs said as he tried desperately to free himself from the ropes holding him close to a large stick. Izzy was currently sharpening a large knife, quietly cackling to herself.

"I hate to do this to a girl," Bugs admitted, noticing a large wine cupboard in the kitchen where Izzy had decided to take him captive, "But she should have realized that attacking me meant war."

Bugs calmly bounced the stick he was attached to causing it to send one of corks from the wine at Izzy, hitting her in the back of the head. Izzy turned around and glared at the rabbit, eye's promising death. She raised her knife, preparing to strike him down, when he bounced again, sending over a dozen corks at Izzy. As she tried to defend herself, Bugs slyly bounced back out of the kitchen, eventually reaching his hole, but just as he was about to jump back into it, Izzy caught the stick he was tied to. Izzy began a struggle to pull Bugs out of the hole, in which he was mostly submerged.

"Got you now you," Izzy pulled the stick out to reveal once again a rabbit made of explosives. She too noticed that the fuses were close to exploding, and she glared at the camera, "I hate that varmint!"

The explosion could be seen for miles.

* * *

Bugs chuckled as he sat in his living room, reading his play-bunny magazine. Today had been more fun since his hey day in the 1950's. He sighed happily as he began to read the newest story bunny, when he was scared witless.

Crack!

"Must be a thunderstorm," Bugs commented, before thinking to himself, "I better move to my weather watch quarters. Good thing that idiot of a host set up a cabin with a concrete basement, I'll spend the night there."

* * *

"Chef, what are we going to do?" Chris lamented as he paced back in forth in the small cabin where they were staying. They're tents had been knocked over by the wind in the storm, so they were supposed to stay in a small cabin that had been prepared for Andrew when he stayed at the island.

"I say we blow up the island," Chef cackled, "that way we can make sure to kill that pest."

"No, Environmentalists would be after our hides," Chris sighed, before staring out of the window angrily, "I say we tell the campers that no one is eating until they get us that rabbit that will bring that little jerk in."

"A little jerk am I," Bugs said as he listened to the two sadists from the basement, "I don't really care for those campers, but keeping food from somebody for simply not completing something you want? Of course you realize," He pointed his finger into the air.

"THIS MEANS WAR!"

* * *

 **Bugs:** _(Dressed as General Patton)_ believe me, if you are at all a fan of Chris, or you do not like cartoon violence, turn your little head, _(Smirks evilly at camera)_ because this is going to be delicious!

* * *

Both Chef and Chris had dozed off, snoring loudly. Bugs silently placed a small blue tooth near Chef's ear, and then quickly ran back into the basement. He cackled as he began to dial a number quickly.

"Hello, calling Chef, hello," Chef woke up slightly, though he was not wholly coherent, as Bugs continued to speak to him through the phone, "Am I getting through to you Chef? They say that you trust your boss, Chris. Don't make me laugh," Chef began to wake up more fully now, but he still couldn't see the blue tooth, "Look at Chris over there, pretending to sleep, all the while he's getting idea's about what he is using your contract money for. Has he even paid you a cent yet?"

Chef angrily stood up, walked over to Chris who was sleeping on the couch, and slapped in him the face. Chris sputtered, holding his cheek from the pain. "What was that for?" the sadist host asked.

"For not paying me my money!"

"Dude, we have been over this!" Chris shouted, "You get paid once the season is over. Now get some sleep!"

Chef then laid back down in his chair, and both of them went back to sleep. Noticing the snoozing crooks, Bugs tip-toed out of the basement, and placed an axe in Chris's right hand. He then checked his blue tooth, and then again returned to the basement.

"You ain't gonna fall for that sweet talk are ya?" Bugs asked a sleeping Chef, "They don't call him Stage-cut Chris for nothing. He's probably waiting for you to fall asleep, so he can do the deed."

Chef woke up, and gasped when he saw the axe in Chris's hand. He then grabbed the axe, and cut the side of the couch. Chris woke up with a start.

"You're dirty tricks didn't work, huh?" Chef asked a thoroughly shocked Chris, who screamed as his wig fell into two pieces.

* * *

 **Chris:** What is wrong with Chef tonight?

 **Chef:** I won't let that little hair gel using jerk get the best of me!

 **Bugs:** Ain't I a stinker?

* * *

Both of the hosts were silently asleep. Suddenly, Chris awoke with a start; he looked over at Chef, sighed, and went back to dream-land. This unfortunately did not allow him to see that the chandelier hanging over Chef was slowly having its screws loosened. Suddenly, when the first screw hit the floor, Chris woke up. Shocked at what he was seeing, he grabbed a ladder and a screwdriver, and set it up. He ran to the top of the ladder, screwdriver in hand, when the last bolt fell from the chandelier, causing the over priced lamp to fall on Chef.

"Hey Chris," Chef said from his seat, "come here."

"But Chef," Chris sputtered, before Chef began to give the over coloned host a beating of a lifetime.

"Maybe that will teach ya," Chef threw Chris onto the couch, "Now get to sleep!"

"Okay Chef," Chris moaned, his face covered in bruises.

* * *

Bugs silently placed a stick of dynamite in Chef's mouth, and then ran behind the couch. He poked Chris on the shoulder, and then with his best Chef imitation, said, "Hey Chris, get me a light."

"Okay Chef," Chris said happily, not wanting to get beaten up again, "I'm just glad you're not going to hurt me again." He then used a match to light the stick of dynamite.

Boom!

"You're mad again aren't you?" Chris said to the thoroughly hurting Chef, who glared at Chris, and then threw him out of the room they were staying. He then grabbed a rope, and tied his hands and legs together, and glared at the host.

"Now stay out there!" Chef shouted, while slamming his boss with a paddle, "and go to sleep!"

* * *

Chef was quietly dozing, happy to be rid of that homicidal host. But then he began to hear a sound of wood being sawed. He looked at the ground surrounding his chair, and was shocked to see that he was about to…

Crack!

Be undercut. He jumped up from the basement, glaring as he looked around for the culprit to the act. He ran through the doorway, and glared at what he saw. Somehow, the sleeping Chris had in his hand a hand saw. Chef glared at the host.

"I don't know how ya's done it," he then smacked Chris upside the head, "But I know ya's done it!"

As Chef walked back into the living room, Bug's attached roller skates to the feet of an incoherent Chris. He then went back under the floor, and grabbed a large magnet. He brought the magnet under Chris, and made him stand up. He then pulled the magnet, and thereby Chris, across the room, causing the host to slam into Chef. Chris desperately tried to apologize, while Chef glared at him.

"So ya want a show down?" Chef then threw a powerful punch, sending Mugsy, I men Chris, barreling into the wall on the other side of the room. Bugs, who had lost the magnet, grabbed it again, and again slammed the host into Chef. Then of course Chef hit Chris again, causing the host to once again barrel into the wall on the opposite side. Then Bugs ran back to the magnet, and the cycle began once again.

* * *

"Ah," Geoff smiled as he walked out onto the common ground of the camp, "What a beautiful day. The sun is shining, the birds are singing, and Chris let us sleep until nine in the mourning."

"You're right Geoff," D.J. sighed, "I haven't had that good a night sleep since we all came to the island."

"I wonder if Chris and Chef are still after that rabbit," Harold wondered. He, as well as everyone else in hearing distance also thought about it to themselves. In fact, only a few of the campers were not at or near the cabins. Cartman was still out looking for the rabbit out in the woods, thought no one cared, Gwen was off doing her drawings, Peter had not come back from his rocket trip, and Bridgette had decided to take a shower. So this meant that 33 campers were trying to wrap their minds around what their insane hosts were up to.

BOOM!

"Well there's your answer," Heather commented, as they saw Chef's and Chris's shack explode into a fiery inferno. Suddenly debris from the cabin began to fall all around the campers, covering the camp grounds with trash. Just as the shit storm appeared to be over, Kenny noticed a large shadow covering his body. With a small squeak, he looked up and understood his cruel fate.

SPLAT!

"Well there it is," Stan said, pointing to the bloody remains of the parka, "You killed Kenny!"

"You Bastard!" Kyle called out.

"What happened?" Geoff asked the burnt man.

"That varmint tricked us into a lit stove," Chef admitted sadly, "he sent us and the whole house sky high."

"Well then where is Chris?" Jen asked the cook. She was answered when she saw an equally burnt Chris fall into the communal washrooms. They heard a girlish scream, and suddenly saw Chris punted out from the shower stalls.

"I think he landed where Bridgette was taking a shower, eh," Ezekiel said, as D.J. picked the Torched man up, and proceeded to treat his head like a punching bag. He may be gentle, but no one better spy on D.J.'s girlfriend!

* * *

"I can't believe that they are making us go out here and search again!" Heather screamed, as the campers once again trekked out to the woods.

"And without breakfast too," Owen moaned, "Oh the humanity!"

"Look," Gwen got up on a stump and addressed her fellow campers, "I know that some of us don't get along, but if we don't get the little creature, than none of us will win the challenge, and none of us will get lunch, let alone that money at the end of the game."

"Where is Andrew when you need him?" Grim mumbled, looking up into the sky.

* * *

 _(Somewhere in Hawaii)_

"Mr. Jefferson," a rather attractive young Polynesian woman said, carrying a telephone in her hand, "There is a phone call for you from that camp in Canada!"

"Ah good," Andrew said as he sat out sunbathing, grabbing the phone quickly, "Well if it isn't the legendary Mr. B. Thanks for doing this for me. You had no idea how poor our challenges had been going for a while, so we were ecstatic when we heard you were doing this."

Andrew paused when the man on the opposite side of the phone began to talk rapidly.

"So Chris won't let the campers eat unless you get caught huh," Andrew mulled it over for a while, "Well I guess move on to stage two. And please tell me you are making personal tapes. Oh good, I love carnage!"

"Anything else," the woman asked.

"You doing anything later?"

"I was going to wash my hair," She said with shifty eyes.

Andrew frowned.

"What about tomorrow?"

"I have really dirty hair."

* * *

"Aw Christ," Bojack moaned as the campers continued to march through the woods, looking for their target, "I do anything to get this challenge over soon!"

"Hey kiddos!" Bugs shouted to the campers, having just popped out of the hole he had chosen to hide in, "I couldn't help but notice the little problem you all are having, so I have decided to help you end this thing once and for all."

"Does that mean you're going to let us catch you, rip out your guts, and stuff you like a cheap pillow?" Izzy asked excitedly.

"No," Bugs answered, "Now let's huddle up, this might be tricky, and so I am going need everyone to cooperate for this."

"Now here is what we are going to do…"

* * *

Chris sighed with frustration as he glared at the camp. He had been tortured so long by that rabbit, that he couldn't remember what life was like when he didn't have to deal with the varmint. Suddenly, the campers burst through the brush, Geoff holding something behind his back.

"We did it!" Grim shouted, as the campers all began to cheer. Chris blanked, and ran up to the campers.

"Did what?"

"We caught the rabbit!"

"Really?" A tear formed in sadist's eye.

"Yep," Geoff explained, "We actually cornered him in the rocks. Tired to blow us up with dynamite, but it backfired," he looked downward, "Unfortunately, we weren't able to keep him alive."

"Wait," Chris glared at the campers, "then how do we know that you actually got him?"

"We have these," suddenly, Bojack pulled out two sets of shoes. But these shoes were not regular sneakers; no they appeared to have been made from a rabbits foot. Chris squealed like a little girl, grabbing the rabbit's feet from the horseman.

"We managed to make two pairs, one for you, and one for Chef," Harold smirked, realizing that they were too taken up in their new foot wear to notice the snickers and cackles of the campers. The two quickly put the pairs of shoes on and began to walk around in them.

"How does if feel to be stepping on your hide rabbit?" Chris laughed as he glared at the shoes, only to blank when he heard the munching of a carrot.

"Ah, nice shoes doc."

Both of the sadists turned, and paled when they saw Bugs Bunny smirking at them. He suddenly put on a cowboy hat, and pulled out a fiddle. He pressed a small button on the fiddle, which made both Chef and Chris snap to attention.

"What's going on?" Chris squeaked, only for the tips of Bugs's mouth to widen.

"The end," before he began to play a jaunty southern tune.

"Let's all go square dancing!"

Suddenly, both grabbed each other's hands and began to dance in a circle. The campers began to clap their hands in tune smirking as the pair of sadists began to dance in the goofy manner.

 _Swing partner dosy doe_

 _Now big guy, step on his toe!_

Chef obliged by slamming his foot onto Chris's foot, causing the host to scream.

"Chef!" Chris pleaded, "Why did you listen to him!"

"I didn't try to," Chef said with confusion.

"The shoes you are wearing have remote control chips in them," Harold laughed, "you are gonna have to do whatever Bugs sings!"

"Oh shit!"

 _Promenade across the floor,_

 _Promenade out the door,_

 _Out the door and into the glade,_

 _Everybody promenade!_

Both Chef and Chris began to go outside, fearful of what plan Bugs had decided to use out of the mess hall. Bugs skipped on out the door, with the campers all following him, smirking at the sadists fear.

 _Step on up, you're doing fine,_

 _I'll pull your hair, you pull mine!_

 _Yank it again like you did before_

 _Then break it up, with a tug of war!  
_

Chris grabbed Chef's beard and pulled on it, only for Chef to do the same with Chris's wig, which he desperately used one hand to hang onto. Before long, they were battling over a fallen tree, right over a small stream that ran through the island. Bugs ran up, and using a pair of hedge clippers, cut both the wig and beard, causing both of the hosts to fall into the creek below.

 _Now into the brook, and fish for the trout,_

 _Dive right in, and splash about_

 _Trout, trout, pretty little trout,_

 _One more splash, and come right out!_

Both Chris and Chef emerged from the water utterly soaked. They were still dancing together, looking at one another in fear. Bugs smirked at his enemies; he had yet to even begin to fight! Before long, they were standing next to a large machine which had been used to wash all of Chris's laundry. The campers glared at Chris.

"You mean to tell me that this whole time you had a washing machine that could have washed our clothes," Heather seethed, before turning to Bugs, "Listen to me rabbit, I want you to make them suffer!"

Bugs simply nodded, before continuing his song.

 _Promenade around the room!  
_

 _Promenade like a bride and groom!  
_

Bugs opened the large door to the washing machine.

 _Open up the door and step right in,_

 _Close the door and into a spin!_

Bugs closed the door, and smirked as Chef and Chris went through a full wash cycle. After twenty seconds, Bugs again opened the door, sending his victims flying across the courtyard of the camp. They flew so far that they smashed apart a wooden fence. Bugs smirked as he ran up to them, having decided on his next verse.

 _Grab a fence post, hold it tight,_

 _Womp our partner with all your might,_

 _Hit in the chin, hit him in the head,_

 _Hit again that critter ain't dead._

Both Chris and began to slam one another with the remnants of the destroyed fence.

 _Wop him low, and wop him high!_

 _Stick a finger in his eye!_

Chef obliged.

 _Pretty little rhythm, pretty little sound,_

 _Womp your heads against the ground!_

Bugs began to lead the thoroughly beaten hosts up the cliff, causing them to look around in fear. They began to turn to the campers with pleading glances, but received nothing but smirks from all of them, even Double D and Morty. Just as they were about to go over the cliff, Bugs seemed to relent.

 _Don't you stray and don't you roam,_

 _Turn around and promenade home!_

Chef and Chris wiped the sweat from their foreheads.

 _Corn in the crib, and wheat in the sack,_

 _Turn your partner, and promenade back!_

Both turned, and with screams of fear, fell off the cliff. The campers cheered, while lifting Bugs onto their shoulders and carrying the rabbit back to the camp. He grabbed a carrot, and began to chew on a carrot.

"And that is how it is done," he told the camera.

* * *

"That is it!" Chris, soaked to the bone, and covered in Shark bites shouted, as he and Chef burst into the Mess Hall, "I am going to- Mr. Jefferson?"

Andrew was currently having a hamburger, as he and the rest of the campers ate to their hearts content. Across from him, Bugs was munching on a carrot, smirking at his two defeated adversaries.

"What are you doing with that varmint!" Chef screamed at the producer, who merely smirked smugly.

"I hired this varmint," Andrew explained, as both Chris and Chef looked on flabbergasted.

"You see," Bugs explained, while munching on a carrot, "I have been running low on appearances lately, so I thought this reality show would be good to get some publicity. Andrew here told me to make your life hell, so we could see if any of these blokes here could even come close to catching me. Which they were only able to do after I decided to help them out."

"Well then no one won the challenge!" Chris shouted at the campers, who smirked back.

"Actually," Geoff smiled at the host, "we all brought Bugs to you, so technically, all of us won immunity."

"So does that mean no one is going to be voted off?" Harold asked, only to be answered when Peter burst through the door, rocket still attached to his back.

"Well what's happened since I left?" he asked the entire camp, who all smirked to one another.

* * *

Noah sighed, returning to his room after perhaps his worst day on the show. Duncan's elimination had brought his second greatest enemy to his doorstep. After only one day, Duncan had managed to destroy his best book, give him a wedgie with a diving board, and throw him into a trash can while making out with Courtney. How the two got together, he would never know.

But now, he would be able to escape the insanity. He calmly turned the bath faucet, and sighed as the hot water began to fill the tub. He calmly eased himself into the water, and smiled happily as he had achieved Nirvana.

Nothing at all could ruin this moment.

CRASH!

Except perhaps Peter colliding into the wall outside, revealing Noah's bath to the outside world. Noah sighed in anguish, knowing what was about to happen as he felt the floor begin to shift under him.

"No, no, no, no," He said with disinterest, as the tub slid from the room, and broke apart on the ground. Cody calmly handed the egg head a towel, and Noah marched back to the lobby, about to demand a new room.

"I can't believe they voted me off," Peter sighed, oblivious to the chaos he had just caused.

* * *

 _(Back in the studio)_

"Now, as promised," Andrew smiled as he placed a tape into a large machine, "We will show you the story of our first new contestant, Mac!"

 _(On the screen)_

"Hey," Mac, the small brown-haired kid from before greeted the viewers, "my name is Mac, and I am eight years old."

Suddenly, a picture of Mac and the blue blob from earlier appeared on the screen.

"My best friend is named Bloo," Mac voiced over, "He is special cause he is imaginary. So I am not only his best friend, but his creator! He can be real tiresome sometimes, but I love him like a brother."

"One day, my mom made me get rid of Bloo, in order to stop my older brother Terrance from picking on me," Mac said sadly, before brightening up, "but we found this great place called Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends. Here, I continue to visit Bloo, and I met great friends like Frankie, Wilt, Eduardo, and Coco."

"I want to be on Total Drama Island to make friends with people outside this house," Mac explained, "And I would like to be able to get my Mom a better house, so I would use the money for that. Thanks again for listening, and if I make it, thanks for picking me!"

 _(Now back to normal screen)_

"I hope you enjoyed that," Andrew said, "next time, we will have Frankie give us her story. Until next time, this is Total Drama Island!"

* * *

 **Losers:** _Courtney, Zim, Noah, Eva, Sadie, Justin, Billy, Rusty, Trent, Cody, Beth, Wyatt, Katie, Homer, Ron, Frylock, Jonesy, Nikki, Tyler, Kim, Mandy, Caitlin, Duncan, Peter_

 _ **AN: I am very happy with how Bugs turned out, as he did seem more than capable of handing Chris his butt on a platter. A**_ _ **nyway, the story continues. I also find it harder to have punching bags when I vote them off, which is why I may plan to bring back some contestants in the future. I hope you all can feed me ideas to help move the story.**_ _ **I would really appreciate you help. Also, next chapter will have a challenge from canon as we had over eight original challenges in a row.**_ _ **Until next time, Sayonara!**_


	29. Chapter 29

Chris: Last Time on Total Drama Island! The Bugs Bunny cycle came to a close. Throughout the day, me and Chef were beaten up, blown up, and thrown away like yesterday's homework. After a long Square dancing saga, it was eventually revealed that Bugs was employed by Andrew to torture us, giving me another reason to hate that producer. In the end, Peter was kicked off the island for his own idiocy, and the final 36 campers are continuing to try to fight their way to the grand prize.

Will we come up with another brilliant and engaging challenge?

Will this episode once again revolve around me getting hurt?

And will Kenny ever actually live through an episode?

Find out now, on Total Drama Island!

* * *

 _(Theme Music)_

* * *

The campers were all standing out on the docks, looking around for their insane host and his military lackey. More than a few moments were filled with dread about the next challenge the man had cooked up for them.

"Hello campers," Chris shouted through his megaphone as he walked out onto the dock, "I hope you all slept well last night, 'cause it might just be the very last time you ever sleep in anything but a coffin."

The entire cast gulped.

"Anyways," Chris continued, "for today's challenge, you're all going to be going on a little hunt for wildlife."

He was interrupted when a sudden gasp filled the air. Immediately, all heads turns towards Bridgette, who had a terrified expression on her face.

"Hunt?" she exclaimed. "You mean... _shoot_ at the wildlife?"

"Relax Bridgette," Chris assured. "National law prohibits us from actually killing wildlife on live television...though that's a shame, really. It would have made for some 'killer' television."

Chris took a moment to laugh at his own joke while everyone else just stared at him awkwardly. Or, in others cases, uncomfortably.

* * *

 **Bridgette:** Okay, I'm convinced. Chris is a psychotic whack job that escaped from an insane asylum.

* * *

"Any who," Chris said after clearing his throat, "For this challenge, you are all required to hunt down an assigned animal and capture it. What animal you will be hunting is all up to chance! Chef, if you would be so kind?"

Chef Hatchet approached the contestants with a small bag. However, that wasn't what the contestants were looking at. Instead, their attention was fixed solely on the huntress costume that Chef was wearing. This costume consisted of a simple short, ragged, leather skirt that showed off more leg than anyone would care to see as well as a ragged leather bra to match. In addition, Chef was also given fur boots and a small hunting knife that he carried on his almost bare hip.

* * *

 **Bridgette:** _(Shuddering)_ I'm also convinced that Chef Hatchet has some mental issues too. I mean, what man in their right mind would WANT to wear that stuff.

 **Chef:** _(Still in his huntress outfit)_ For cryin' out loud! You think these maggots would learn how to stomach this after awhile! Why, back in the army, we had to learn how to stomach more gruesome sights than this in order to just survive and keep our mentality in check! Again, these pukes wouldn't last a minute in my platoon! _(He pulls out a mirror and applies some matching lipstick to go with his costume)_

* * *

"Inside this bag are some lottery balls," Chris explained. "Chef will come by each of you and you will select a ball from the bag. Inside those lottery balls is a piece of paper with an animal on it. Some animals are friendly...others, not so much. But as of now, we have all thirty-six animals locked in secure locations around the island. On my signal, an air horn will ring throughout the island. That sound means that the animals have been released from captivity. Your challenge is to track down your animal and bring it back here in our cage."

"But...why would anyone want to do something like that?" Bridgette questioned, sounding disgusted by the mere thought of the challenge.

"Because it makes for good television," Chris explained. "I mean, have you seen some of the shows out there lately? 'Hog Hunters'; 'Deadliest Catch'; the list goes on! People eat this sort of ting up!"

* * *

 **Rick:** _(Rolling his eyes before taking a swig from his flask_ ) Just goes to show that people on Earth are fucking stupid enough to watch anything.

* * *

"Anyways," Chris continued. "For today's challenge, I've decided to grant multiple invincibility again today. For those who are able to bring back their animals to the cage within the time limit, you're safe from elimination tonight. "But for the first person to bring back their animal, he or she will receive a full fledged meal courtesy of 'Joe Cool Catering!'"

Just then, a vehicle could be heard approaching. Everyone glanced over to see that the cameraman with a funny looking nose was now driving a small van with the words 'Joe Cool's Catering' written on the side. He pulled up next to the campers and nodded politely at them before jumping out of the van and beginning to prepare the feast that awaited the grand prize winner.

"Okay then! Let's get this bad boy underway! Bridgette, since you're the most eager about this challenge, I think I'll have you pick first."

Chef approached the surfer girl with the bag and held it out in front of her. She looked down at the bag with unease at first. But finally, she reached in and pulled out a lottery ball. She cracked it open and read aloud the animal written down on the piece of paper inside.

"...the great...brown...bear..." she shivered as her face went white.

"Ooh, that's a tough one. Too bad Bridgette," Chris teased.

"Tough luck hippie," Cartman snickered as he pulled his lottery ball out next. He continued to laugh at Bridgette's misfortune as he cracked open his ball, which greatly annoyed her much to his delight. However, once he saw the name of the creature written down on his parchment, the nine year old's eyes bulged with pure terror and his skin had gone even more white than Bridgette's had. Within seconds, his face had lost all color.

"Oooh, judging by your expression Cartman, I think I know what you drew," Chris chuckled.

"Can I switch? For the love of God please," he frantically begged the host.

"Sorry dude, but all decisions are final" the host sinisterly smirked.

Everyone heard Cartman swearing up a storm under his breath. But that's not what had them worried. They were more concerned about the creature he drew. It wasn't everyday that they saw the fat boy shiver with pure terror as he was at this point in time. It made them all feel a little uneasy inside. When they asked him what it was he had to capture, Cartman just quivered. He was too petrified to even speak the creature's name.

Next was Double D. He drew a seagull. It wasn't the Ed boy's first choice, since birds were so difficult to capture. But he could have gotten a bear or whatever it was that Cartman got.

Bart boldly drew from the bag next. The prankster read his paper and shrugged casually. "A frog," he smiled. "I can do that."

Lindsay was next to pull out a ball. She reached in and dug around for a minute, trying to decide which one just felt right. Heather barked at her to hurry up, to which the blonde apprehensively obliged. Nearby, Gwen, Leshawna, and Leela just glared at the queen bee.

"...Oh no," she whimpered as she read her piece of paper. "I've got to capture...a shark?"

"How the heck are you supposed to capture a shark?" Gwen demanded. "That's impossible!"

"Not if you're the Fonz," Chris chuckled. "I mean, if he can tangle with a shark, then anyone can."

"'Happy Days' is a fictional show!" Morty snapped. "You can't expect her to pull this off!"

"Well, then it looks like she'll be up for elimination tonight," Chris shrugged.

"Hey! I'll trade with Lindsay if she doesn't want her's!" Cartman instantly suggested.

"I already told you! No trading allowed!"

Cartman hung his head in uncharacteristic despair and fear much to the surprise of Stan, Kyle, and Kenny. There was no way he was ready for what he had to face. In his mind, Lindsay had the easier task ahead of her.

Heather reached into the bag next and pulled out a ball. She smiled when she saw that all she had to capture was a measly rabbit.

Next was Leela. The cyclops had pulled a raccoon. She nodded her head, a stern and serious look on her face the whole time.

Gwen reached in next. The Gothic girl quirked an eyebrow when she saw that she had pulled the duck. An odd choice, but doable nonetheless.

Geoff reached into the bag next. The party animal hung his head when he saw that he had to find a way to capture a snake. He knew that those things were no easy creature to handle.

Izzy reached in the bag next. She was like a kid in a candy store as she excitedly dug through the balls that were still inside. Finally, she pulled one out. She crackled madly when she saw that her target animal was a deer.

"Woot! Just like 'The Deer Hunter'!" she excitedly proclaimed. "Now Izzy can take her place in history alongside one of the greatest movies to ever be made!"

Jack got a white wolf. Leshawna got a beaver. Owen had a chipmunk. Bojack, to his annoyance, had to capture an actual horse. Stewie had to catch a haw and Brian a mongoose. Fry a bobcat, Bender a tortoise, Eddy had a bat, Ed a chicken much to his delight, Master Shake a turkey, Meatwad a goose, Early had an elk, Rick had to catch a buffalo of all things, Ezekiel to his dismay had to capture a mountain lion, Harold had to catch a skunk. Kenny had the displeasure to try and wrangle an alligator. Stan had to catch a coyote while Kyle had the unfortunate luck of capturing a wolverine. Grim got a gopher, Courage an eagle, DJ a goat, Jude a weasel, Jen a badger, and Dib a squirrel.

Last was Morty. The teen dug into the bag and pulled out his lottery ball. He nervously cracked it open and read the name of the animal written on the piece of paper inside.

"...a moose..." he read. "How the hell am I supposed to capture a moose?!"

"I'll leave that to you," Chris shrugged. "Okay then! Now that you all have your animals, the hunt will begin in ten minutes. First, you're all allowed to go into the boat house and grab any necessary items you'll need in order to successfully capture your animal. Anything you want or can imagine is in there. Then, you'll head for the woods. Once you hear the air horn, that'll mean that the animals have been released that the challenge will officially begin!"

* * *

 **Heather:** I know I'm still a main target to all these creeps. But you know what? As far as I'm concerned, they're all main targets to me as well. I don't care who goes home next. The only thing I care about is getting invincibility.

 **Izzy:** _(Grinning)_ Oh yeah! This one's gonna be all Izzy! No one can hunt better than me!

 **Bridgette:** Oh, I don't know...I guess since we're not shooting any of the animals...oh, I just wish we didn't have to do this inhumane act towards those poor, innocent creatures... _(she sobs slightly)_

 **Cartman:** _(He's still shuddering)_ Okay, that stupid hippie can say what she wants about the other animals being poor, innocent little creatures all she wants...but she doesn't have to hunt what I've got to hunt! And you guys want to talk acts of cruelty... oh holy Jesus God!

* * *

In the boat house, the contestants were searching around, trying to find anything of value that could assist them in the challenge. Leela found some carrots hiding in the corner. What carrots were doing in a boat house, she didn't want to know. But she did know that raccoons would eat just about anything. She was about to leave the boat house with her find when...

"Give me those one eye!"

Heather didn't even give Leela a chance to respond as she swiped the carrots from her hands in one, swift motion.

"Hey! Those are mine skank!"

"Not anymore."

"But, I found them first!"

"Well, I found them from your hand, so finders keepers!"

"That doesn't even make any sense you idiot!"

Leela harshly pushed Heather out of her and into a pile of garbage in the corner. Glaring at the space captain with hatred in her eyes, the queen bee just stormed off into the woods. She didn't need this, she had a rabbit to capture.

Leela adjusted her tank top as she just glared at Heather's retreating form.

"Whoa...harshness."

Geoff interrupted her thoughts as he approached the cyclops to see if she was alright. "You okay bra?"

"I'm fine," Leela grumbled as she brushed herself off as best she could. "But I've still got to find something before the animal sare released for the challenge."

"Well, you've got the raccoon, right?"

"Yeah."

"Well, then you could probably use this!"

Geoff smiled as he handed her a container labeled 'Raccoon Food'. Leela's eyes widened with surprise and joy as she accepted the food.

"Thanks!" she beamed. "But...what about you? Can you find anything to capture that snake?"

"Well...I found this snake trap," he shrugged as he showed her a cage that was disguised as a house with a sign on it that read 'Snake House: All Snakes Welcome For a Good Time'.

"Well...looks like the material in here for us to capture our animals is quite convenient for us all," Leela pointed out.

"Indeed it is," Geoff agreed. "But still, who in their own right mind would think of making a cage like this?"

"I don't know...but I'll bet Chef uses this raccoon food for his meals."

"Cha! That's probably why is tastes so bad," Geoff chuckled.

* * *

 **Chef:** Oh, I resent that! I do NOT use raccoon food. That's just plain disgusting! _(He grumbles under his breath a little)_ I use badger food! High in protein and fiber, you know!

* * *

Bart managed to find a small net fitting to capture a frog. Jack helped Lindsay find a giant net. One big enough to capture a shark. The blonde was appreciative, but still apprehensive about the upcoming challenge.

After a few minutes of searching, Gwen found a box labeled 'Badger Food'. Shrugging, she tossed it aside and then pulled up another box labeled 'Duck Food'.

"Well, this'll work just fine," she smirked.

Double D scrounged around the piles of junk, looking for anything he could to try and help him catch a seagull. Unfortunately, he wasn't as lucky as some of the other contestants were. All he found was a rope. All the other nets had been taken and Izzy had come across the tranquilizer gun before anyone else could find it.

Morty didn't have much luck either. All he found was a red cape that was usually used for bull fighting. How this would help him in catching a moose, he still didn't know. But according to his philosophies, it was better than nothing.

Bridgette gasped in horror as she held up a bear trap in her hand. Refusing to use anything that would bring harm to an animal, she threw it out into the lake and searched for something else. Something that wouldn't hurt the poor creature she was being forced to bring into captivity.

"Hey! I could have used that you dumb bitch!" Cartman snapped.

"Nuh uh!" the surfer girl snapped back. "There's no way I'm letting you or anyone else use something that gruesome and cruel to harm any of these animals."

"Bitch, I don't have an animal! I've got a creature so terrifying..." Cartman stammered. Just the thought of having to deal with it was enough to make him want to pass out.

Bridgette, not believing Cartman, continued to search for something that would aide her capture of a bear in a non-violent method. The best she could find was a fishing rod.

She glanced over at Cartman, who had managed to scrounge up a chainsaw. The fat boy was clinging onto the weapon for dear life. He knew he was going to need it for the task that lay ahead of him as he slowly followed the other contestants as they all made their way into the woods.

Some of the contestants decided to break off into smaller groups while others decided to have at it alone. One group consisted of Double D, Bart, Kenny, Gwen, and Lindsay since their animals could be found near bodies of water. Geoff, Harold, Ezekiel, Fry, Leela, Grim, Jude, Jen, Jack, Ed, Eddy, and Courage made up a group of their own. The remaining campers were left to fend for themselves.

* * *

"So...what do you the rest of you say? Once we've captured our assigned animals, we help one another catch theirs that way we all win invincibility," Double D suggested. "I do not care about the meal. Just so long as all five of us arrive back safe, I'm content."

"Me too," Lindsay agreed. "I'd hate to see any of you guys go...oh, and you too Gwen."

"Gee...thanks," Gwen rolled her eyes.

"I think it's an awesome plan!" Bart agreed. "Besides, I think Lindsay's going to need help catching the shark. I mean, how the hell is anyone supposed to catch a shark with the tools we've got?"

"Aww," Lindsay awed as she smiled at the jock with appreciation.

"Yes, I will help as well," Double D added with a smile.

"Thanks Double D," she chuckled. "But you know, you've got the easiest one to catch I think."

"You think catching a seagull is easy?" Gwen asked, quirking an eyebrow.

"Sure! I mean, anyone can do it. I heard that anyone can catch a bird if they can mimic the kind of bird's call. And the seagull has the easiest bird call of them all!"

"You know the seagull bird call?" Double D asked.

"Sure! It's really easy. It goes like this."

Lindsay stopped in her tracks and cleared her throat. Gwen, Bart, Kenny, and Double D watch her, amazed that Lindsay knew something as complicated and skill oriented as bird calling.

Then, Lindsay opened her mouth and immitated what she believed the be the call of the seagull:

"Mine! Mine! Mine! Mine! Mine! Mine! Mine! Mine! Mine! Mine! Mine!"

* * *

 **Gwen:** Yeah, Tyler does not like Lindsay for her brain.

 **Bart:** And I thought Homer had a head full of pudding.

 **Lindsay:** _(Looking confused)_ I don't get it. It worked in 'Finding Nemo'. Maybe I need to lower my voice a little. (She clears her throat and tries again in a lower voice) Mine! Mine! Mine! Mine!

 **Seagull:** Mine!

* * *

Chris glanced at his watch.

"...five...four...three...two...one...TIME!"

Chris blew on his air horn.

"It's time to release the animals! Chef, give the word to our newest intern!"

Chef gave Chris the thumbs up and pulled out his walkie talkie.

"Four Star General to Airnaruto45! Four Star General to Airnaturo45! It's time to release the animals. Over."

Chef waited for a response from the other end, but none came.

"BUTTER BOY!" he hollered.

"Oh. Sorry," came the voice of Butters on the other end. "I guess I'm still not used to this whole codename thing yet."

"Yeah whatever," Chef grumbled. "Anyways, it's time to release the animals! Now get to it!"

"Are you sure?" Butters asked back. "Some of these animals look pretty vicious and..."

"Your job isn't to think! Your job is to be a slave to me and Chris just like your other weirdo friends! Understand? Now let the animals go!"

"...Yes sir..." Butters miserably replied. Chef then heard the sound of a button being pushed followed by the sound of buzzers going off. Chef grinned wickedly and flashed a thumbs up to Chris, who grinned sinisterly back with evil satisfaction.

* * *

Morty was wandering around the forest, helplessly lost. He was beginning to think that maybe it wasn't such a good idea to venture out alone and that he would have been better off going with someone like Bridgette, Geoff, Jack or even Rick.

 _'Well, there's nothing I can do about it now,'_ he sighed as he continued his hike.

Suddenly, he heard the air horn that Chris had warned him and the other campers about. He froze dead in his tracks and began to search around his surroundings frantically. He knew that a moose could be quite territorial and that if it was a moose that Chris had caught, it would probably be twice as aggressive as a normal moose.

 _'Bridgette's right,'_ he shivered. _'Chris is one sadistic bastard.'_

But his thoughts were interrupted when he heard what sounded like a metal gate being swung open a few yards away from him. That sound was then followed by the frightening sound of a creature howling and thunderously galloping around. The sound grew louder and louder until finally, the creature came into view a measly fifty feet away from Charlie Brown. Just as he feared, it was the moose he was supposed to capture.

The moose sniffed the air and, sensing the boy's presence, sharply turned his attention towards the fourteen year old. Morty could only shiver as he stared into the blood red eyes of the moose. Whenever the creature exhaled, it almost looked as though steam was coming out of it's nostrils. But what really had Morty on edge was the mere fact that, without a shred of doubt, this was easily the biggest, meanest, and deadliest moose that he had ever seen.

Morty gulped and weakly smiled at the moose, hoping that it would tame the creature a little bit. Unfortunately, he would get no such luck. The moose could sense his fear and, grinning evilly, it slowly turned it's body so that it was facing the child. In response, Morty began to slowly back away, holding his red cape in front of him as though it were a shield. Then, the moose began pawing at the ground, grunting and huffing all the while. Charlie Brown continued to back up, but faster than before.

Then, in an instant, the moose charged. It's antlers were pointed straight down and it had targeted the fourteen year old for extermination. Taking the hint, Morty let out a great cry and bolted in the opposite direction as fast as his legs could carry him. He had let go of his cape, which the moose disintegrated as it raced by it.

True, the moose was very fast. But with pure adrenaline now flowing in his veins, Morty was now running just as fast as the moose in an attempt to escape the murderous creature.

* * *

"Whoo Hoo!" Izzy cheered as she heard the air horn go off. "It's time for the hunt! About time too. My finger was beginning to itch with anticipation."

She cricked her neck and fingers as she braced herself for the challenge. She held up her tranquilizer gun and began to track down her prey.

A few minutes later, she heard something in the bushes nearby. Acting purely on instinct, Izzy leaped up into a tree branch and pointed her gun in the direction where the noise came from. Indeed something was in the bushes and it was on it's way out.

Grinning wickedly, Izzy put her finger on the trigger, and readied to fire. Seconds later, the creature came out. To Izzy's disappointment, it wasn't a deer. And, to her horror, it was something much, much worse.

The red head gasped in shock and then quickly silenced herself, for fear that the creature might have heard her. She began to sweat profusely when the creature lifted it's ears up and heavily sniffed the air as if to try and smell the location of whatever made a noise.

Izzy didn't move. She didn't breathe. She didn't think. She didn't blink. She knew that one wrong move could be her last and that with a creature this dangerous and vile, she had to have all her senses at perfection. She did her best to control her intense sweating and heavy heartbeat. For a creature like this could sense fear and wouldn't hesitate to attack on the slightest impulse.

She watched as the hideous thing ate something in it's hand. What it was, Izzy couldn't quite see. But she didn't dare adjust her body to take a better look. The creature made somewhat of a grunting sound as it dug into the ground and relieved itself. The repulsive smell almost made Izzy vomit,but she controlled the urge to in order to save her life. It didn't help that the thing didn't even bury it's filth after it was done. It just sniffed the air a little more and nibbled some more on whatever it had in it's hand.

Finally, after what seemed like years, the creature scurried off on all four legs through a thicket. Izzy stayed in the tree a good five minutes before she dared to come down.

The first thing she did was bury the rancid wastes that the creature had left behind. Then, without waiting another minute, she raced off in the opposite direction as fast as her legs could carry her.

* * *

 **Izzy:** _(Still shivering)_ Whoa! I'm telling you all right now, Chris needs to be put in jail for even letting a creature like that onto the island with a bunch of teenagers. Not even Izzy would dare tangle with a creature that vile and gruesome. You'd have to be beyond my level of insanity to even attempt to take on that...that... _(she quivers in fear again)_ I don't think my rival Jack or that Rick guy can take it down. Now Izzy knows why Cartman is so scared.

* * *

The surfer girl was deeply regretting having gone off alone. She was so distracted about having to hunt down one of mother earth's beautiful creatures that she had forgotten that she was petrified of being alone in the woods.

'And to make matters worse, I've got to find a bear to boot,' she thought to herself as she shivered.

Even the slightest sound would cause her to body to tense up and sharply turn around and search the area frantically for any sign of something that might jump out and attack her.

''Gwen...Geoff...DJ...Double D...Courage...Jack...Morty...Ezekiel...where are you guys?' she gulped as she hiked deeper and deeper in the woods.

Suddenly, the bushes behind her began to shake vigorously. Bridgette froze and stared wide eyed at the said bushes. She was like a deer looking into the headlights of an oncoming car.

After what seemed like an eternity, something finally came out of the bushes. Or rather, someone. And to her dismay, it was a certain red sweater wearing fat kid.

Cartman gasped when he saw the surfer girl standing in front of him. Relieved it wasn't the thing he had to hunt, he took a deep breath and relaxed his body.

"Oh, thank God," he sighed. "For a moment there, I thought you might have been...brr..."

"I thought you might have been the bear," Bridgette replied. "Though now I'm kind of wishing it was."

"Fuck you, hippie, you're more useless and worthless than Bella Swan!"

Bridgette gasped in horror. Cartman had taken it one step too far now. Bridgette may have had her weak moments on the show and a fair number of men have come to her aide. Geoff. Kim. DJ. Even little Courage once. But one thing she was not, nor would ever allow herself to be, was useless.

"...I'll have you know..." she growled, a fierce face now forming on the normally calm face of the surfer girl, "...that if there's anything that I hate, I mean REALLY HATE...it's being called useless..."

"Ooh, I struck a chord in the hippie's head and now she's mad," Cartman grinned evily.

"Someone needs to teach you some manners," the surfer girl retorted as she prepared to charge the fat boy.

"You're really going to fight me?" Cartman laughed. "I think that constitutes as child abuse."

"It'll be so worth it," Bridgette growled, raising her fists. Normally, she wasn't this violent. But given the circumstances, she was more than willing to make an exception.

"Well...I'm waiting," Cartman casually smiled, almost as if he was looking forward to it.

"Not for long you won't...cause here..."

Bridgette was interrupted when something could be heard growling menacingly in the nearby bushes, catching both of the contestant's full attention. Judging from the way the bushes were shaking, it was something big and dangerous.

Instantly, Bridgette's rage subdued and panic began to fill her once again. Her first thought was the bear had found them. She had spent so much time arguing with Cartman that she hadn't had time to put her plan in motion.

Unfortunately for her and Cartman. It wasn't the bear. It was something worse...far worse.

The creature jumped from the bushes and fixed it's attention on the two humans standing in front of it. Cartman and Bridgette both gasped in horror as the creature slowly began to make it's way towards them. It licked it's chomps and snarled viciously as it drew closer and closer to the petrified teenagers.

"I-I-I-I-Is that...you..."

"Uh huh, Oh God, I'm so fucking dead," Cartman answered, now quivering with uncontrollable fear. And who wouldn't when something you had to capture was this horrendously ugly and dangerous to even be in the same vicinity as.

The creature continued to creep it's way towards the terrified campers. As it approached them, it continued to eat at the small object it held in it's hand and drink from another object it had in the other hand. It's almost disfigured face and body was facing directly in the direction of both Bridgette and Cartman. It could sense the complete fear the two had of it and growled with excitement. It knew that this was going to be easy prey to capture.

In pure excitement, the creature stood up on it's hind legs and shrieked these words...

" _...Snooki want smoosh smoosh!"_

* * *

"Well that seems like a nice cliffhanger to leave this episode on," Chris commented as he relaxed on the dock, "Will someone save Cartman?"

"Which camper will be the first to win immunity?"

"And who will be the next camper to ride he boat of losers?"

"Find out next time, on Total Drama Island!"

* * *

"This time," Andrew said as he turned on a smaller screen, "We have Frankie to explain her life at Fosters."

* * *

 _(On Screen)_

"Hi, I'm Frankie," the young, red-haired woman greeted, "I am actually the Granddaughter of Madame Foster, the founder of Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends."

"Over my life here," she continued, "I have spent most of my time working and doing chores for the household. Believe me, when you have to do chores for around two thousand different creatures, you get tired easily."

"So, when Mac showed us the show, a group of us decided to apply. I want to join so I can get away for a while, not to mention hopefully meet a cute boy in the competition. If I win the money, I will use it to hire some one who will be able to take care of the house so I can go off to college. Thanks for sending the tape, and I hope we make it on."

* * *

 _(Back to control room)_

"Next time," he said, "we hope to show you Bloo's video. Now let's get to a special celebration block."

* * *

"Party!" Owen shouted, as the entire cast of Worlds Collide ran into the main cabin. Music boomed from several loudspeakers. The entire gang began to enjoy many of the snacks that had been placed out for them by the author.

"Man," Geoff said, calmly dipping a donut into his soda, "Can you believe it's been a year already?"

"Yeah," Gwen growled, "And yet the stupid new author can't get off his butt to do more than this short thank you to the viewers for a year of support. I mean, what would happen if a franchise just happened to say that they were tired of trying on a story, and just slapped something together to get reviews?"

"That was the last season of Family Guy," Stan pointed out, causing the rest of the cast to nod.

"So," Jude began, "anyone wanna make a bet when this fic finally gets done, and we move onto season two?"

"I don't think it'll take another year," Morty said, "I mean, he must come up with some new ideas soon."

"Hah," Heather chuckled, as she began to leave, "I bet this guy never gets finished."

And then Heather tripped over a bug.

"Okay everyone!" Andrew shouted, "Get together and say, "Wawanakwa"!"

"Wawanka-AHHHH!"

The shouted as the sprinkler system turned on. In the control room, Chris was laughing as he looked in the large monitor at the group.

"What's up doc?"

Chris turned, and was shocked to see Bugs, who calmly pulled out a frying pan and walloped the arrogant host. As Chris incoherently commented on the pretty birds, the rabbit then turned to the camera, and gave the camera-man a knowing wink.

"Tune in next time for a whole new episode of Total Drama Island!"

* * *

 _ **AN: Well it has indeed been almost a year since I've started this story. I would like to thank everyone who reads my fics, and who takes time to review them. This chapter was inspired by another Total Drama fic I've read a few years back, though it seems fitting since I have the actual South Park characters this time. I hope you still find this story enjoyable, and are looking forward to the next chapter from me. Until next time, thank you again!**_


	30. Chapter 30

Chris: Last time on Total Drama Island! The campers were all assigned with an animal for them capture. Some were simple, some were hard, and some were just downright ungodly horrifying! Speaking of ungodly, our favorite fat kid Cartman had the unfortunate luck of capturing the most horrible creature of them all with Bridgette getting caught in the crossfire. Man, now that's what I call a sticky situation!

Who will capture their animal first?

Will Cartman and Bridgette be able survive their terrifying encounter?

And will Kenny really live through an episode for once?

Find out now, on Total Drama Island!

* * *

 _(Theme Music)_

* * *

Izzy had finally gotten out of the tree she had been hiding in once she sensed that the Snooki was no longer in the vicinity.

"Ugh... not even Izzy would want to mess with a creature that vile and gross," she shuddered.

But she soon shook the horrific feeling from her mind and refocused her attention on the task at hand: to capture a deer before the time limit expired. She didn't care too much about being the first one to do it since whoever managed to capture their assigned animal would win invincibility. But she did care about being bested by the Samurai Jack yet again.

"No sir," she grumbled to herself. "Izzy will not let her nemesis best her again. This time, Izzy will be victorious and show up that damn samurai! He..."

Just then, she heard a familiar presence getting closer and closer. Sure enough, the wandering samurai only known as Jack went speeding by her as fast as he could. Izzy glared at her rival.

* * *

 **Izzy:** Okay! Izzy has had enough of that samurai! Not only does he manage to get the best of Izzy during all these challenges! Now he thinks he can just run by and ignore me! The fiercest competitor here! Well, if he thinks ignoring Izzy is going to make her forget about him and our rivalry, he can think again! It's time for our final confrontation!

* * *

Izzy had to run fast, but she eventually caught up to the speeding Samurai Jack.

"All right samurai!" she called out while trying to keep up with the wandering samurai. "Let's cut to the chase! Izzy doesn't like you and you don't like Izzy! I can cope with that! What I can't stand is your constant getting the best of Izzy in all these challenges! How you can still best Izzy throughout this whole contest is beyond me! My guess is you're actually a lot older than look which is why you're so good at beating Izzy all the time! Maybe centuries in fact! Now normally, Izzy would be amazed and ask why you look so young. But you've embarrassed me one too many times! So here's the deal I'm willing to make you! If you just stop holding back this time and give Izzy your all, Izzy will make your elimination from this game as painless and quick as possible. And considering how you've wronged Izzy so many times in this contest, Izzy would say you're getting the better deal! So what do you say?"

Jack didn't answer her. In fact, he hadn't been listening to her at all. His mind was focused solely on getting Morty to safety as earlier when he was busy hunting for his assigned animal, he caught a glimpse of the teenage boy being chased by the moose he was assigned to capture. Forgoing winning this challenge to help those in need, the samurai went to his young friend's aid. His eyes caught sight of a large tree nearby with a trembling Morty sitting on top of one of highest branches. He made a dash for it and climbed up it as quickly as a skilled samurai could.

"Oh! Don't think hiding up a tree is going to save you samurai!" Izzy called up. "Izzy is a master tree climber and could jump to the top of this tree before you're even half way up! Now come down here and give Izzy the fight of her life!"

Before Izzy could get an answer, she suddenly felt a rush of hot air blowing on the back of her head. The crazy red head turned slowly around and found herself staring into the blood red eyes of a very angry moose. The crazed moose almost seemed to foam at the mouth as it continued to snort and growl at the teenage girl.

But did the gruesome beast scare Izzy? Not a chance.

"Beat it buster!" she snapped as she slapped the moose right across the face. "Izzy's busy with her sworn enemy right now!"

Needless to say, the moose was shocked. What was even more shocking to the vigorous mammal was that the red headed human standing before him casually turned her back to it once she had said her peace and was yelling up to the scrawny boy it had chased only moments ago.

"So what's it going to be samurai? This is your last chance to accept Izzy's challenge! You've got one minute to come down and begin our final battle! After that, Izzy's coming up after you!"

Once the moose got over the state of shock, it growled furiously. The actions of the red headed teenage girl had offended it greatly. Snorting, it slowly backed up and lowered it's head at it's new target. It took aim as it pawed the ground, preparing to charge.

"Time's almost up Samurai Jack! Five more seconds before this gets complicated! Four! Three! Two! One! And..."

BAM!

Izzy soon found herself flying through the air as well as a sudden pain in her backside. As she soared higher and higher, she turned back to see the moose staring up at her victoriously.

"Okay," Izzy grumbled as she folded her arms while still soaring through the air. "Now Izzy's mad."

* * *

"Some of you dudes seem down."

Geoff's group who had recently been joined by Stan, Kyle, Leshawna, and Dib had been walking in silence ever since the challenge had officially begun. They hadn't had any luck in tracking down their assigned animals.

"Well...it's just...we're so fed up with this damn game!" Stan was the first to speak up.

"But...the challenge just began. You all can't be frustrated with it already."

"No, no. I mean the game overall. All the lying, cheating, back stabbing, sadistic asshole TV host trying to have us all killed on a daily basis, bastard chef serving us piles of shit for dinner...when is it all going to stop?" Stan questioned.

"Until there's a winner...unfortunately," Geoff sighed. "But yeah, I hear ya dude. This show's been intense since day one. I mean, what with what happened to your hometown, Courage having no family, Heather and Cartman's alliance, Izzy and Jack..dude, things really are messed up around here!"

Stan didn't reply. He appeared to be thinking really hard about something. Something that had been bothering him for quite some time now.

"You know," he finally said, "A lot of fucked up things have happened in this game already, with so many people getting hurt already and despite all of that, I still don't want to lose this contest. But...will it really be worth it in the end?"

Geoff just took a deep breath as he continued to listen to Stan. Finally, he spoke.

"You know Stan...I can see where you're coming from. Like you said, we all want to win this game and the sad fact is that only one of us can win. So yeah, bad things are going to happen and some people like Heather or Cartman are going to play dirty in order to get further in the game. And I've got to hand it to Cartman, he's done well to get this far without getting voted off. Shows how strategical the the dude really is, huh?"

Both Stan and Kyle just glared at the party boy with disdain at that last comment. Geoff rubbed the back of his head sheepishly. He wanted to help the two boys, but he wasn't sure if he knew the right words to say. But he shrugged and decided to wing it.

"But you know what? Without an alliance, I doubt those two would made it as far as they did."

Stan looked up at the party animal with a confused look.

"What are you on about Geoff?" He asked.

"I mean, without people backing them up, none of their plans would have succeeded. They needed help to carry out their plans and needed other people's votes to get rid of the the contestants they wanted to get rid of. Without those people, Heather or Cartman probably would have been voted off a long time ago."

Now, Stan and Kyle were really intrigued.

"I guess what I'm trying to say dudes is...with all of us working together, we have the power to stop Heather and Cartman and have them eliminated so no else ends up getting hurt because of them."

Before anyone can say anymore, the conversation was abruptly cut short by a familiar voice that the group knew all too well.

"Hey!"

The group stopped dead in their tracks. Standing in front of them was a certain queen bee that the campers had been recently talking about. She was covered in mud and looked quite upset.

"Oh great, little miss spoiled princess is here," Leshawna said with clear contempt.

"That stupid rabbit managed to escape my trap because I didn't have any _carrots_!" she growled as she glared at a certain purple haired camper

"Well, did you double check to make sure it couldn't get out of your trap?" Leela asked.

"I didn't think the rabbit would escape! Why didn't you tell me rabbits were sneaky like that?"

"Why is it her fault your rabbit got away?" Geoff demanded.

"Shut it party boy! I'm in no mood!"

"You're never 'in the mood'! And quite frankly, I'm getting tired of it! We all are! You're totally killing the party, bra!"

"I agree, why don't you go fuck yourself queen bitch!" Stan shouted.

"Who died and made you in charge of us, you heartless whore!" Kyle chimed in.

"I'm warning you, pea brains! One more word and you'll be the next one to go home! Starting with party boy over there!"

The campers gasped in shock.

"But... Geoff never did anything wrong!" Harold pleaded first.

"He's here, he's talking back to me, and he's keeping all of you losers from helping me! That's reason enough to vote him off next! Now quit your blabbering with brainless there and one of you go back to the campgrounds and get me some more carrots! I'll see if I can't get a better trap ready!"

Heather turned around and began pulling on some nearby vines. Leela looked back and forth between her and Geoff, who was now standing there looking somewhat hurt. She couldn't help but feel bad for him. After all, he hadn't done anything wrong and had lead his team to victory countless times.

"Are you all still standing there?" Heather barked. "Go get me some more carrots!"

Then, Leela wasn't quite sure what happened, but something in her head snapped. Angrily, she took a deep breath, stomped her foot, and uttered that one word Heather hated most of all.

"…...No..."

Then, as if she had been kicked, Heather whipped around. A look of shock and anger had overtaken her face.

"What did you just say to me?" she demanded.

Leela snarled as she took another step. "You heard me bitch, I said...no!"

* * *

"Doh!" Bart groaned as he landed face first on the lake's shore once more. He had been unsuccessful in five different attempts to capture the frog that Chris and the interns had released.

Gwen was preparing her badger trap nearby. She had yet to see her target creature so she figured that instead of separating from her group to go find it, she would instead try and lure the badger to her. She had laid some badger food in the woods and led a trail of it right back to the net she had made.

Double D jumped helplessly at a seagull. It almost seemed to be laughing at his misfortune as it continued to fly around carefree.

Kenny didn't have much luck either as he was too scared to even go near the shore where the alligator was, considering that he had already been brutally ripped to shreds by one in a previous challenge.

Lindsay was having nothing but trouble as she tried to figure out how to work the giant fish net she had. Being the daughter of a wealthy businessman, she had never been fishing once in her life. She had never even seen a fishing pole, so to figure out a fishing net the same day she had discovered them was asking the impossible.

After Double D's fifth failed attempt to grab the seagull, he threw his hands in the air in frustration. He was going to need a plan if he was going to be able to capture the troublesome bird. Then out of the corner of his eyes, he noticed the blonde bombshell struggling with her fishing net.

* * *

 **Double D:** I have decided that since I was having so much difficulty trying to catch that accursed seagull, I should allow myself take a small break from it to come up with a plan. However, I could not in good conscious just stand there and ignore someone who may require my assistance. You see, I'm somewhat of an expert at knots. So if there is anyone here that could aid Lindsay with a fishing net, it would be me.

* * *

"Good afternoon to you Lindsay," Double D greeted flashing his best smile. "How are things proceeding with your task?"

"Terrible," she whined. "Why couldn't I have just gotten a fishing pole instead? Those things are probably _way_ easier to figure out than these nets. But then... I'd have to put a worm on the hook and...EWW! Forget that! I'll stick with the net," she shuddered.

Double D just chuckled to himself. Knowing Lindsay, it was no surprise that she would say something like that. But he didn't mind her fear of getting dirty all that much. Sure, he had a similar fear as well. But this flaw was minor when compared to all the good he saw in her.

"Um... if you would like, I could perhaps help you with your net," Double D offered.

"Would you?" Lindsay gasped excitedly. "I would _so_ appreciate it!"

"Of course. It's actually quite simple. First, you have to tie a knot here like this. Now make sure it's a release knot because you're going to want it to release when you pull the net to trap fish inside. Then, once your net is set, you grab a hold of it by the sides and toss it in like a sack of potatoes."

"Um... how do you toss a sack of potatoes?"

"You really do not know how to do that?"

"Not really. You see, we've got a butler and other hired servants back home to do that sort of stuff for us."

* * *

 **Double D:** Well, I am not going to lie. If Lindsay would ever require further assistance in future challenges, our social class lifestyles may become a problem.

* * *

"It's very easy. Here. Allow me to show you."

Double D stood behind Lindsay and guided her hands to where they needed to be on the net. Then, his hands still on hers, he instructed her to pick the net up. Once she had the net in her hands, Double D guided her arms and body to be in the perfect position to toss the net. Finally, he helped her throw the net into the water. Amazingly, they managed to do it right on the first try.

"Just like that," he instructed. "If you keep doing it like that every time, you are bound to nab that shark sooner or later."

"Great!" Lindsay squealed excitedly. She then turned her head back to the sock hat Ed boy. "Thanks Double D."

"It was no issue."

The two stared into each others eyes and smiled.

"Um, Double D?"

"Yes?"

"You're... um... still holding onto me."

Indeed, the sock hat boy was still hanging onto Lindsay's hands while still standing behind her.

"Oh! Uh... my apologies. I did not mean to..."

"It's okay," she assured him while laughing.

Double D returned the laugh as he blushed slightly while sweating nervously.

* * *

 **Double D:** Oh my, that was a bit awkward. Considering the fact that Lindsay's already in a relationship with Tyler. I hope he doesn't see this.

* * *

Nearby, after another failed attempt to grab his frog, Bart caught Double D and Lindsay out of the corner of his eye. He froze dead in his tracks as a sense of jealousy flooded his mind. Like many of the male campers in this competition, Bart had a bit of crush on the blonde bombshell and thought that he might be losing his one chance to score some points with her (or at least in his mind).

Once Double D had gone back to trying to capture his seagull, to which the sock hat boy was still struggling greatly with, the prankster casually walked up to the blonde with the best smile he could conjure.

"Hey Linds," he greeted her. "How's the shark fishing going?"

"Okay, I guess," she replied. "I'm still having a little trouble with the net, but not as much as before thanks to Double D."

"Heh...yeah, that Double D...real good with this kind of thing and all, right?" Bart muttered.

"Yeah, he sure is."

"You know Linds, if you ever need help with the net, feel free to call me over because..." Bart paused to take a deep breath to puff his chest out as manly as he could. "... I can do it even better, you know."

Lindsay beamed at Bart in amazement. "Really?"

"Sure thing. Here man, let me show you an easier way!"

The prankster then took the net from Lindsay's hand and proceeded to show off his amazing net fishing skills to her. He made sure to flex a little bit as he tossed the net into the water in a very stylish matter. His technique may not have really been as good as Double D's was, but it did what Bart set out to accomplish: it impressed Lindsay greatly.

"Wow," she sighed as she watched Bart with a smile. "That _is_ a neat trick!"

Nearby, a certain orange parka wearing boy couldn't help but notice the little show the prankster was putting on for Lindsay. Like Bart before him, he suddenly felt a bit jealous when he saw what was happening. He wasn't gonna let some yellow punkass score with possibly the hottest girl he had ever seen. He rolled up his sleeves and marched right back over looking quite pissed off.

"(Hey not bad, dude,)" Kenny casually complimented. "(Not bad at all.)"

"Yeah, I know," Bart replied. "It's just something I learned how to do when..."

"(But I can't help but notice,)" Kenny interrupted, "(that the way you do it doesn't quite open the net up as large as it needs to be in order to capture something as big as a shark.)"

"Huh?"

"(The way you is all wrong for big game. I mean, it's fine if you want to catch some small fry. But if you want to catch a goddamn shark, then you've got to do it like this.)"

Without asking, Kenny snatched the net from the Bart's grasp and demonstrated what he thought was the correct way to throw the net into the water.

"I see your point, dude," Bart replied, trying to hide how irked he was getting. "But the way I do it has always worked for them in the past when fishing. Heck! Despite my dad being a complete idiot, he does it this way all the time and he still caught pretty big fish with the net."

"(You got a point there. But once again, your way is not going to catch that shark. You've got to know the exact angle to position your body and the exact amount of power to put into each toss. But I'm sure someone like you wouldn't be able to understand the concept.)"

"'Someone like me'? What the hell is _that_ supposed to mean?" Bart demanded. He was no longer hiding his annoyance.

"(Oh, I'm not trying to make you look dumb or anything, dude)" Kenny casually remarked. "(It's just that... well... since we were both on the same team, I've gotten to know you pretty well and... let's just say that your not the brightest guy around. And you've got to have the brains to better understand what goes into throwing a net to catch something that big.)"

Bart just stared at the poor boy blankly. As did Lindsay. After a moment of silence, Bart snapped out of his confusion.

"Oh yeah? Well, I could say the same to you! Knowing you, you probably end getting yourself killed trying to catch that shark! Even if you did open the net up to... whatever it is you just said... you'd probably only catch minnows cause you can't get it past the shallow end of the lake without dying!"

"(Is that so, you dumbshit?)" Kenny growled as he walked up to the prankster.

"Yeah! It is so!" Bart retorted, walking up to the geek in response.

"Um... guys? What's going on here?" Lindsay asked. Clearly, she was tense at the scenario involving the two boys that were so willing to help her. But both Bart and Kenny were so caught up in their little argument that they didn't even hear or notice how uncomfortable Lindsay was at that moment.

"Well, I'll bet I could catch that shark for Lindsay before you could!" Bart snapped.

"(I would take that bet, but there's a small problem! In order to make an acceptable wager, I would have to bet against someone that actually knows how to count!)" Kenny retorted.

"Oh! An insult, huh? I'll show you! Give me that net!"

"(No way! I had it first!)"

"It's mine!"

"(Mine!)"

"MINE!"

"(MINE!)"

"Guys! Stop it!" Lindsay pleaded. She had no idea what was going on or why the two were fighting over the net.

As the prankster and the poor kid continued to play tug-of war with the net, they didn't notice that their legs were starting to get tangled up in the part of the net that was still dangling on the ground. The more they struggled with one another, the more their legs got tangled. Finally, the two tripped over their own two feet and bumped into Lindsay, who was tangled in the net as well. The three campers soon lost their balance and fell off the side of the cliff into the water below.

Nearby, Gwen and Double D approached the lake. They had both managed to successfully capture the badger and seagull in their traps and had just arrived to see how their friends were holding up. They were confused when they didn't see anyone in the area. But then, something caught Double D's eye: the handle of Lindsay's net. It was floating right along the shore with no one there to watch it.

Gwen sat her trap down and grabbed hold of the fish net.

"Ugh! It's heavy! Something got caught!"

"Oh dear, I hope Lindsay's alright."

When Gwen finally managed to pull the net ashore, she found that the net had caught a poor kid, a prankster, a blonde bombshell, a frog, an alligator, and a giant shark all at once.

Lindsay was screaming in horror as the frog was sitting right on top of her head. The alligator was rolling around madly as it tried to get out of the net. The shark was just glaring angrily at Bart for sitting on his tail.

"Oh my," Double D said.

"Um... did I miss something?" Gwen asked.

Then Lindsey screamed when she saw something else in the shark's mouth.

"That shark!" she shouted, "Killed Kenny!"

Indeed, the orange parka of the boy was stuck in the teeth of the shark. Suddenly, Bart looked at the camera.

"Hey, wait a minute," he asked, "Haven't we already done this one before?"

"Yeah," Gwen added, "That was how Kenny died in the first episode."

"The author must be running out of ideas," Bart offered, before somehow a horseshoe fell from the sky and hit him in the head.

* * *

"Oh God, get away from me! Leave me alone!"

Morty cried out for mercy as the moose rammed it's head against the tree that he was in. The teenager could only cling on for life as the psychotic mammal continued it's attempts to pummel him.

A few more headbutts later and Morty started to lose his grip on his branch. He wrapped his feet around it for more support. But the persistent moose wasn't about to give up.

As the moose continued to grunt and headbutt the tree, it failed to notice the presence of a certain samurai hiding in the bushes. His eyes were fixated on the target. Then without warning, Jack leaped out of the bushes and slammed his foot down onto the moose's head, knocking it out instantly.

"Are you all right my young friend?" Jack asked Morty.

"Yeah, I guess so. Thanks Jack," Morty replied before a look of dread appeared on his face as he saw the moose starting to get back up. Before he could warn Jack of what was happening, he suddenly heard the familiar cry of an angry red head.

"AY YI YI YI!"

Izzy let out a massive war cry and jumped from the bushes and tackled the moose with full force.

From the tree and the ground, all Jack and Morty could see was a cloud of dust and all he could hear was the sound of the moose and Izzy grunting as they struggled to out wrestle one another.

* * *

 **Morty:** To he perfectly honest, I didn't know which one was going to win at the time. All I did know was that it didn't matter. Because either way, I knew that Jack was probably going to be next. _(he shudders)_

* * *

Finally, after five minutes, the dust cleared. Izzy stood proud and tall on top of the unconscious moose.

"Ha!" she exclaimed in victory. "When you mess with the thunder that is Izzy, you'd best be prepared for the boom that will follow!"

"Gee... thanks Izzy," Morty called down.

"Indeed, that was most impressive," Jack praised.

"Oh, don't go thanking Izzy just yet, samurai... you and I still have matters to discuss."

The samurai could only sigh. Somehow, he knew this was going to happen.

"Now then, as I was trying to say before I was so rudely interrupted by this feeble attempt of a beast: accept my challenge and do not hold back! Do so now and Izzy will be lenient!"

"You have not yet earned the right to face my blade," Jack responded. "Despite your ancestry, you still have much to learn young one."

Izzy just snarled in response to his words.

"Izzy can see that the samurai likes doing things the hard way. Oh well... this is the only part of being Izzy that Izzy doesn't like."

"Um...what are you talking about?"

"Well... if you won't settle this peacefully, Izzy is going to have to..."

Before Izzy could explain herself, the moose she had conquered had gotten back on it's feet and headbutted the crazy red head from behind, sending her flying through the air once again.

"...Speaking of slow learners..." she sighed as she soared off into the distance.

* * *

"...What did you just say to me?"

"I... said... no!"

Geoff, Leshawna, and the rest of his group held their breath as they watched Leela finally confront the mean girl that had been tormenting everyone all season.

"I'm sorry," Heather said. "I;m not quite sure I heard you correctly. I think I might have some dirt in my ear or something because..."

"Than read my lips, Heather! NO! None of us have to do anything you say!"

Heather's eyes nearly popped out of her head. All her life, she was used to getting what she wanted without anyone arguing or putting up a fuss. And here was this mutant freak, of all people, refusing to let her have her way for the first time in her life.

* * *

 **Geoff:** Whoa! Did that, like, just really happen? Did I just witness Leela stand up to Heather? _(He pauses for a minute and then smiles)_ Dude, if I do get eliminated tonight because of this, I can leave the game happy! Because THAT was worth the grand prize alone! Kudos to you dudette!

 **Heather:** _(Her arms are folded)_ So I'm standing there thinking to myself, 'Is she serious? Does she know who she's talking to? Did she forget that I have to power to have her eliminated from this contest TONIGHT?' And then, it hit me. She was probably just upset that I called her friends brainless. So, easy damage control. I just apologize, then she or someone else'll get my carrots, and I can win invincibility. Simple as that.

* * *

"Okay Leela was it? Look, I'm sorry I snapped at you and I'm sorry I called your friends here brainless. Okay? Now one of you go get my carrots."

"What part of 'no' did you not understand?" Leela snapped. "No one's going to help you anymore! Period! And not just because you insulted Geoff! But because you're a manipulative, evil, spoiled, rotten brat! And the rest of us don't have to take any of your crap anymore!"

Heather gasped in shock. Then, she glared evilly at the farm girl.

"Take that back," she growled.

"Like I said Heather: We don't have to do anything you say. So NO!"

"You little cretin! You do know I have the power to eliminate you, right? All I have to do is say your name and you're gone!"

"The only reason you have the power is because those lackeys of your _gave_ you that power! You only got your way because you manipulated those who would listen to vote alongside you! They went along with all your plans! The only reason the people you had eliminated are gone is because they agreed to vote with you! Face it, uou don't have any power without someone to string along!"

Heather opened her mouth to retort, but as Leela's words sank in, she came to a horrible realization: Leela was right and she knew it.

"It's over Heather!" Leela continued to cry out. "You're not going to be the one with power in this game anymore! Not as long as the rest of us have anything to say about it!"

Heather just gritted her teeth as she stared evilly at Leela.

"...Mark my words, cyclops! You just made the biggest mistake of your life!"

"The only mistake I made was not stopping you sooner!"

Heather opened her mouth to reply, but she was too angry to find any words. She just scoffed and stormed back to camp. For the first time in the competition, she was on her own.

Geoff had to hold his laughter in until Heather was out of sight. But it wasn't easy listening to the queen bee swear and scream in fury as she stomped off.

"Leela! You did it bra!" Geoff exclaimed.

"Yeah, girl! You really told her!" Leshawna praised.

"I guess I had a lot of aggression inside me." Leela replied

"I'll say. Remind me not to get on your bad side bra," Geoff said.

* * *

The moose was now trying to saw the tree down in it's latest attempt to get the Morty out of the tree while Jack stood its way with his sword now unsheathed.

"Why couldn't I have gotten a normal animal like everyone else?"

As the moose sawed, Izzy had entered the terrain once again. This time, she was up in another tree plotting her next move on the moose.

"If anyone is going to have revenge on the samurai, I'm going to have it moose," she growled as she applied black war paint to her face.

* * *

" _...Snooki want smoosh smoosh!"_

Cartman and Bridgette backed slowly away from the Snooki. Neither one dared to make any sudden movements and though it was hard to do, they had to remain calm.

"Don't let it know you're afraid," Bridgette whispered to the fat kid. "It can sense fear."

"Easier said than done, hippie. What the fuck are we going to do now?"

"Just stay calm and don't make any rash moves," Bridgette replied. "I'll think of something."

All the while, the Snooki just licked herself as she sniffed the air and nibbled on the pickle in her hand. One way or another, it was going to get the smoosh smoosh it wanted. After all, Snooki's were known for getting smoosh smoosh whenever they wanted it.

" _...smoosh smoosh...Snooki want smoosh smoosh..."_ it continued to chant.

"Why the fuck does it want 'smoosh smoosh' hippie? You're an animal expert, right?"

"Well..." the surfer girl shuddered. The mere thought of it was repulsive enough. "When a Snooki says it wants smoosh smoosh... it means it's looking for a mate. And if I remember correctly, a Snooki usually craves smoosh smoosh every two to three days and it doesn't care if it gets it from a male mate or a female mate just as long as it gets it's smoosh smoosh."

"Oh God... no way I'm letting it force me to be it's mate! All those STD's... NO FUCKING WAY!"

Then, in a moment of panic, Cartman did the unthinkable: for the first time in his life, he started to run away from a challenge.

"Cartman! No!"

But Bridgette was too late to stop the fat boy. The Snooki sensed Cartman's moment of weakness and pounced on the unsuspecting teen. It grabbed Cartman by the collar of his shirt and violently dragged it to some nearby bushes chanting 'smoosh smoosh' the entire time.

Another first came from Cartman at that moment: he cried out in pure terror as he was being dragged to the bushes.

"HELP! SOMEONE! HELP ME! OH GOD! NO! PLEASE! NO! NO! NO!"

" _Snooki gonna get smoosh smoosh!"_

Bridgette watched helplessly as one of the most hated campers on the island was dragged out of sight in the bushes to his inhumane fate.

Now that the Snooki had chosen her mate, Bridgette knew that the wisest thing she could do was make a run for it as fast and as hard as she could. She turned to run, but she was interrupted by the screams of horror and terror of Cartman.

"NO! NO! PLEASE! SOMEONE! ANYONE! HELP!"

* * *

 **Bridgette:** So there I was, stuck in one of my inner battles with myself when I knew I should be running for my life. On the one hand, that brat was about to get everything that his karma owed him. But listening to him cry out so helplessly and in such terror... doh! Sometimes, I think my ability to care for others too much is a curse. And only God knows why I'm about to do something as crazy as confront this creature head on. I just hope the shots the Total Drama doctors gave us all before the show can protect me from whatever diseases that thing is carrying.

* * *

" _Snooki going to get smoosh smoosh!"_

"PLEASE! NO! OH GOD! IT'S GOING TO RAPE ME!"

Cartman struggled to get out from under the creature. It had ripped his red sweater off and was now trying to tear off his pants. Despite his struggles, the Snooki's craving for smoosh smoosh was far too strong for him to overpower.

'Oh, I can't die like this!' he thought helplessly to himself. 'I just can't! No! I don't want to die! God, I don't want to fucking die! Please help me!'

"Hey! You!"

Both Cartman and Snooki ceased their struggling with one another. Both turned their attention to the surfer girl. She was standing there in the wide open.

"Come on Snooki! You want smoosh smoosh?"

 _'Snooki want smoosh smoosh!"_

"Then come get smoosh smoosh!"

Bridgette threw a stone at the Snooki and then took off into the wood as fast as she could. True, she was afraid of being alone in the woods and all. But being assaulted by a Snooki was far more dangerous and scary in her eyes, so she decided to face the lesser of two dangers. As expected, the Snooki decided to give chase. Not only was it excited to get smoosh smoosh, but it's instinct wouldn't allow it to forgive even the tiniest of insults or physical assaults. It just had to have the last hit in a fight.

Cartman, who was practically in tears due to almost dying by contracting some kind of deadly disease the Snooki was surely carrying, just sat up and stared in the direction the Snooki and surfer girl had run off to. He couldn't comprehend what had just happened. Bridgette, the one person he had harassed and teased throughout the entity of the challenge, had just turned around and saved his life while putting herself at risk.

'Why? Why in the hell would she do something like that?' he thought to himself.

* * *

"C-come on! J-just leave me alone!" Morty continued pleading with the savage moose. "I didn't _want_ to hunt you down! But I had no choice! You have to believe... GOOD GOD! IS THAT FUCKING DYNAMITE?"

"What madness is this?!" Jack exclaimed as he readied his blade in case things took a turn for the worse.

Sure enough, just as Morty feared, the moose has somehow gotten it's hoofs an some dynamite and was now planting it under his tree. It glanced up at the teenager and the samurai as it gave them an evil smirk.

Once all thirty pounds of dynamite was in place, the moose began to dig through his coat of fur for a match. It grunted in frustration as it couldn't find one.

"Looking for this moose?"

The moose turned around and saw a match that was already lit right being held in front of him. The moose smiled as it took the match from the mysterious person's hand and used it to light the TNT. Once the string ignited, it hid behind a nearby boulder, covered it's hears, and shut it's eyes.

But little did it know that the same mysterious person that had given it the match moved in on the dynamite, grabbed all of it in one scoop, and quietly placed it right by the moose without it knowing.

For quite some time, the moose didn't know the danger it was in. Then, it began to smell the odor of sulfur nearby and turned around. It's face dropped as it recognized what was happening, but it was too late. The dynamite exploded and the moose was sent off into the sky like a firework display.

"HA HA!" The mysterious figure cried in victory. The figure jumped out from the shadows and revealed herself to be Izzy. "Headbutt Izzy once, shame on Izzy! Headbutt Izzy twice, shame on moose!"

She then turned her attention to Samurai Jack once more.

"All right samurai! This is your last chance! If you don't accept Izzy's challenge and draw you sword against her, things are going to get very, _very_ grim for you my worthy foe!"

"Your choices have clearly led you here, as have mine," the confidence and discipline in the samurai's voice shook Morty to his core. "I will give you a new choice; leave now and live, or stay and face your destiny."

Izzy seemed somewhat shocked by Jack's remarks. She hadn't expected this.

"Enough words, samurai," she replied. "I must admit I admire you courage for being so willing to take the consequences. But not enough to spare you from the horrible thing Izzy must do to you now. I hope you're ready for..."

A loud thud interrupted Izzy again. The crazy girl jumped around instantly to see what dared interrupt her this time. What she found was a charred moose with blood red eyes staring directly at her, pawing viciously at the ground and grunting ever so violently.

"Why can't you let Izzy have her revenge peacefully?" she snapped. "Fine! Whatever! I'll take care of you first if I must!"

* * *

Chris, Chef, Butters, Craig, Tweek, Jimmy, Timmy, Rolf, and Jonny stood by the finish line awaiting the arrival of the contestants and their assigned animals. Their attention turned to a certain queen bee that marched out of the woods angrily empty-handed.

"Heather, bra, you do know that the only way you can win this challenge is to come back _with_ your animal, right?" Chris asked.

"Thank you so much for reminding, Captain Obvious," Heather snapped back as she stomped off towards the campgrounds. "I need some more carrots! Your stupid rabbit ate my first ones."

The host, chef, and the interns just watched in fear as Heather stomped out of sight. They could of sworn that the ground shook and trembled with each step she took.

"Is she always like this?" Craig asked Chef.

"Not always," Chef replied. "Sometimes, she wakes up in a good mood... but oh dear, look out when she wakes up in a bad mood."

"How bad can she get?" Butters asked next.

"Let me put it to you this way little solder: I recall once upon a time during the war when we had to make our way through a mine field. Half of us didn't make it through that field... I would rather go through that again than put up with that girl on her worse day."

Butters shuddered at the thought of that. The only other person he could imagine being that grumpy all the time was Cartman. If Heather was anything like him, he did not ever want to get on that girl's bad side.

His thoughts were interrupted when he saw another group of teenagers coming out of the woods. This was the group that consisted of Gwen, Lindsay, Double D, Bart, and Kenny. Gwen and Double lead the way with her duck on her shoulders while the Ed boy carried the seagull safely in his hands. Behind Gwen, she was dragging the net that contained Lindsay, Bart, a still deceased Kenny, the alligator, the frog, and the shark. Without saying a word, Gwen and Double D approached the cages and put their duck and seagull in one first. Gwen then got her teammates out of the net and placed their animals in their cages for them as they recollected themselves.

"Well then, I think it's safe to say that Gwen is the undisputed winner of the challenge. Which means that she wins a dinner from! As for Double D, Bart, Lindsay, and Kenny, you four also win invincibility!"

"You're all welcome," Gwen said as she stood by the cages proudly.

"Yes, well done Gwen," Double D muttered as he brushed some seagull feathers off his shirt. "Is everyone else alright? I mean...besides Kenny I suppose."

"I'm good," Bart answered.

"I'm not," Lindsay whimpered,"Now because of all your fighting, my clothes are ruined with swamp mud, my mascara is running, and worst of all, you ruined what was supposed to be a fun challenge with friends!"

The upset blonde didn't even give Bart a chance to respond as she stomped off towards to communal showers to clean up. The prankster now had a look of guilt and shame on his face.

Nearby, a certain queen bee, who had finally retrieved some more carrots, managed to see the entire scenario unfold.

"Ha! Way to screw up losers!" Heather taunted as she passed by the other campers.

"You know Heather, if I were you I would focus less on making people mad at you and more on getting your rabbit for the challenge if you don't want to be voted off tonight," Chris chuckled.

"Do I look like I'm worried about that in the least?" Heather boasted confidently. "In fact, I'm so confident in myself, I guarantee that I'm going to be the next one to bring back an animal to these cages!"

"Dudes! We found our animals!"

Heather's eyes bulged with shock as she heard the excited voice of a party animal emerge from the woods. She turned around to see the entirety of Geoff's group walking towards the cages with their animals. Some such as Geoff with his snake that was coiled affectionately around his shoulders, Leela with her raccoon that was enjoying being cradled by the one that had caught her. Stan and Kyle both had leashes around bot the coyote and wolverine as didn't they want to take any risks handling these animals. The campers just smirked mischievously at the queen bee as they placed their animals into their select cages.

"You were saying Heather?" Chris chuckled.

Heather just grumbled under her breath and marched back into the woods without another word.

Geoff's team happily placed their animals into their cages, securing their place in the game.

Nearby, Gwen couldn't help but notice and smiled as she was glad that her boyfriend was able to get invincibility.

* * *

 **Gwen:** _(Folding her arms)_ Okay, this is totally out of character for me as I usually can't stand this puppy love mushy stuff. But you know what? Geoff is such a great guy... so today, I'm going to put that distaste for this kind of stuff aside. Besides, it's a nice change of pace compared to what I went through earlier with the whole Bart and Kenny trying to impress Lindsay thing.

* * *

"Hey Chris?"

"Yes Gwen?"

"I was wondering... would it be okay if I could share my reward with Geoff?"

Geoff looked over at the goth girl with surprise.

"Really babe?! You'd do that for me?"

"Sure, why not? After all, I get the feeling that we are long overdue for a dinner together," she replied with a smirk.

Geoff blushed a bit as he smiled greatly at Gwen.

"Hmm... let's see...," Chris spoke aloud. "Take this advantage to show off the obvious blossoming feelings that you two have for one another for the public to see and boost the ratings? You bet!"

Gwen and several other campers just scowled at the host. _'Jerk,'_ Gwen thought to herself.

Geoff approached the green haired loner and hugged her in appreciation.

"Dudette, you are seriously awesome!" Geoff added.

"I know," she smirked back.

The sound of hands clapping interrupted the the couple. They all turned around and saw a certain rabbit now wearing an apron and donning a Chef's hat (To this, Chef Hatchet grumbled under his breath). Bugs Bunny snapped his fingers once again and motioned for the two teens to follow him over to the dinner table his assistant Porky Pig had set up for them. Not wanting to keep the chef or their stomachs waiting any longer, Beth and Geoff eagerly raced over to the table to receive their meal.

* * *

 _ **(Elsewhere, where things aren't going as smoothly)**_

Bridgette breathed heavily as she raced through the woods as fast as her legs could carry her. She was terrified beyond comprehension. Not only was she all alone in the woods once again. Now to make matters worse, she was being hunted down by one of the most vile disgusting creatures of all time.

She wanted to scream out in terror. She wanted to cry out for someone to help her. She desperately wanted to be anywhere but where she was right now. At home surfing with her friends; with her mom enjoying a good vegan dish and laughing together; with DJ holding one another and whispering sweet nothings just to hear his voice and take here away from the danger she was in.

" _SNOOKI WANT SMOOSH SMOOSH!"_

The shrieking sound of the Snooki brought Bridgette back to reality.

'Come on Bridge,' she thought to herself as she quickened her pace. 'You have to keep going. Otherwise, the consequences are beyond dire.'

And doing her best to block out her fear of being alone in the woods, she continued to race through the woods as fast as she could, unknowing which direction she was going in.

* * *

All Jack and Morty could do was watch in silence as their two stalkers circled the battlefield down below, sizing one another up for the epic confrontation. What made it so uncomfortable for the young teenager was that he knew regardless of the winner, he or Jack was going to be next on his or her hit list.

 _'Oh Jeez,'_ he thought to himself. _'How the hell do I get into these situations?'_

Down below, Izzy and the moose stared intensely at one another, preparing for the ultimate showdown.

Izzy cricked her neck. The moose cricked his as well. It then pawed at the ground. Izzy did the same. She snorted at the large mammal. The moose grunted back at the insane red head.

Then, without warning, Izzy let out a major battle cry and charged at the moose head first. The moose growled in return and charged at Izzy as well full speed ahead. Both combatants picked up their speed and charged at one another with teeth clenched and eyes focused solely on the other. Finally, their heads collided. Izzy was the one who took the fall and landed on her bottom. Shaking off the effects of the attack, Izzy glared up at the moose, who was grinning triumphantly at her.

Was Izzy going to settle for defeat? Of course not. She rolled out of the way just in time before the moose could bring it's hoofs down on her and took her distance again.

Once again, the two were sizing the other. Then, with another battle cry each, the two charged head first at one another yet again. This time, when their heads collided, it was the moose that was knocked down and Izzy standing triumphantly over the animal.

But the moose didn't stay down for very long. It jumped right back on all four legs and growled ferociously at Izzy once more. But Izzy, getting bored with charging at the moose every time, just grabbed a nearby log and simply bashed the moose over the head with it.

The moose was dazed for a split second before regaining it's composure. It let out a loud roar and kicked Izzy as hard as it could, sending the red head flying through the air.

But Izzy, being Izzy, caught sight of a vine hanging from the trees and managed to grab hold of it as she flew by it. Then, letting out the cry of Tarzan, she swung back towards the moose once again.

The moose had no time to react as Izzy kicked it, sending it flying in the other direction. But like Izzy, the moose managed to grab hold of a vine with it's mouth and swung back towards the crazy teenage red head.

The two kicked at one another as they swung around the clearing of the woods. Each time their feet would make contact with the other, the sound of the collisions thundered throughout the woods.

Needless to say, Morty stayed as quiet as possible and hid as best as he could while Jack continued to analyze the fight with a determined look on his face.

* * *

 **Morty:** _(He looks quite nervous)_ During the entire battle, all I could think to myself was: Holy shit! we're going to be next!

* * *

 _ **Back at camp**_

It wasn't long before the rest of the remaining campers came by with their assigned animals looking no worse for wear.

Geoff and Gwen were sitting down and enjoying the fine dinner that Bugs Bunny and one of his faithful friends Porky Pig had prepared for them: a large pepperoni pizza with a side of chicken wings, salad, and freshly baked bread sticks.

"Makes you think Bugs should be the chef and Chef should be one of the interns," Geoff whispered to Gwen.

The goth laughed at this, unaware that Chef was grumbling under his breath while scraping some unknown substance under his boot and throwing it in his ingredient's bag.

Meanwhile, the said bunny was approaching the two contestants with some soda pop. As he poured the cool contents of the drink into their glasses, a light jazz melody could be heard playing in the background once more. Geoff and Gwen just looked at one another with loving smiles on their faces. It seemed that things were looking up for

" _ **AUGH!"**_

All heads turned towards the outskirts of the woods and could hear the sound of a someone terrified beyond reason racing towards them. Seconds later, a horrified looking blonde surfer girl covered in mud and twigs emerged from the woods running as fast as her legs would allow her to.

"Bridgette?!" Geoff called out anxiously. Something was clearly wrong.

"Bridgette? Bra? That bear a little too much for you to handle?" Chris teased.

"Not a bear!" Bridgette cried out as she raced past Chris. "Not a bear!"

"Huh? Bridgette, what on earth are you talking about?" Chris called after her. "You clearly had a bear for you animal to capture. What the heck else could..."

 _"SMOOSH SMOOSH! SNOOKI WANT SMOOSH SMOOSH!_ "

Chris' smile disappeared instantly and he froze dead in his tracks. He knew that sound all too well. Not to mention the immense danger he was now in. But before he could make a run for it, the creature known as the Snooki had emerged from the woods. And the sadistic host was the first person it saw.

"OH FUCK THIS!" Rick exclaimed as used his portal gun to open a green wormhole and jumped through it.

"I'M OUTTA HERE!" Chef cried out and raced for the nearest form of shelter he could find.

Bugs and Porky, without a moment's hesitation, quickly packed up their catering tools, grabbed hold of Gwen and Geoff, and raced off after Chef and Bridgette.

" **OH DEAR LORD, NO!"** Chris exclaimed in terror and raced off after the others.

" _SNOOKI WANT SMOOSH SMOOSH!"_ it cried out excitedly and gave chase.

Within seconds, the host had passed Chef. Then the interns. Then every other camper. He made a bee line for his trailer, bolted inside, locked the doors, and wasn't about to let anyone else in.

Chef was the first to reach the trailer too. He banged on the door frantically, begging Chris to let him in. But the host wasn't listening to his pleas. The campers, and the interns had joined Chef in banging on the trailer.

"You son of a bitch!" Brian yelled.

"Dude! Let us in!" Geoff begged.

"Help us!" Gwen pleaded.

"I don't wanna die, eh!" screamed Ezekiel.

"MAMA!" DJ sobbed.

"Please! Don't leave us out here!" Bridgette cried out.

"Don't let her get me!" Eddy screamed.

"Dear Lord!" Double D shouted.

"Snooki bad for Ed!" Ed wailed.

But their pleas went unheard.

"Jesus Christ, what the hell do we do?" Stan exclaimed.

"Oh, God." Kyle moaned as he grabbed his head and stumbles away, then falls on all fours, "Wuh. Aah. Get out of here!"

"Why?" Stan said flatly as Kyle continued writhing and then threw his hat away. He then pulled out a tube of gel and puts some on his left hand. quickly greases up his hair, takes off his jacket, rolled up his sleeves, put on a necklace, combed his hair, puts on rings on his left hand, and writes "KYLeY-B" on his T-shirt.

"Dude."

Those who were outside the trailer gasped and slowly turned around. Slowly approaching them with lust and longing in it's eyes was the Snooki. It licked it's chomps as it closed in on it's helpless prey. _"SMOOSH SMOOSH!"_

Chef hid behind Meatwad and Early... or as best as a seven foot muscular man could hide behind a talking ball of meat and a redneck squid.

Bridgette and Gwen each clung onto one of the terrorized party animal's arms tightly.

"Geoff! If I never told you this, I'm glad we met and were able to become friends," Bridgette confessed

"Me too bra," Geoff replied.

"And then I won't get another chance to say it... Geoff... I... I think you're great!"

Geoff's heart stopped momentarily. Not because of the immense danger he was in. But because of what Gwen had just said to him.

"You're not the smartest guy I've ever met. Or the most romantic or grateful. But I've never met anyone with a heart bigger than yours."

Geoff didn't know why, but in spite of what was about to happen to them, he could feel his heart melting. He knew he had to tell Gwen how he really felt too while he still had time.

"I think you're great too Gwen!" Geoff replied.

In that instant second, Gwen's fears of the Snooki vanished as she let Geoff's words sink in.

"Really?" she asked, grinning the widest grin she had ever grinned.

"Definitely," Geoff replied instantly, also smiling greatly. "Behind those highlights, dark clothing, and amazing figure is the most genuine, sweetest, and radical babe I have had the pleasure of meeting in my entire life."

By now, Gwen was ecstatic and was smiling from ear to ear with a sparkle in her eyes.

"Aww, that is probably the most romantic thing I've ever heard," she whispered.

"Me too Gwen," Geoff replied meaningfully.

Everyone else and even Chris (from his window) watched the two stare at one another deeply and affectionately. The moment was a touching one to say the least. That is, until...

 _"SNOOKI WANT SMOOSH SMOOSH!"_

The shrilling shriek of the Snooki snapped everyone back into panic mode. The creature was now a mere three feet away from them. It prepared for the pounce as the victims closed their eyes and braced for the inevitable.

But just as the Snooki was ready to pounce...

 _ **SMACK!  
**_

The Snooki let out a cry of pain. Everyone opened their eyes to see what had happened. And the sight they saw was unbelievable to say the least.

Standing between the six victims and the Snooki was a nine year old boy dressed like he was auditioning for Jersey Shore with nothing but his comb, hair gel, and a determined look on his face.

"Get out of here, you piece of garbage! You wanna smoosh, go creepin' somewheres else!" Kyle boldly stated.

The vile creature growled and snarled at the nine year old. But with his inner Jersey now unleashed, Kyle had nothing to fear.

"You're garbage! You know that?! You're cabbage!" he exclaimed as he punched the Snooki again. The creature cried in pain as it backed away from the nine year old.

 _ **SMACK! SMACK!**_

" _SMOSH SMOOSH!"_

"You've got cabbage in your muff!"

 _ **SMACK! SMACK! SMACK!**_

Each strike forced the Snooki back further and further. No matter how it tried to jump on Kyle or get by him, she was no match for the Jersey nine year old.

 _ **SMACK!**_

"You've got cabbage in your fuckin' muff!"

It took Kyle almost one whole minute to force the Snooki away from the petrified contestants and staff of Total Drama and towards the other animals stuck in their cages. But Kyle was able to get the job done and with one final left hook, he forced the Snooki into it's cage and locked the door, securing the creature inside.

"Ugh...what the fuck just came over me?" Kyle groaned as he came back to his senses.

Then, before he knew what was happening, Kyle was surrounded by the individuals he had rescued.

"Dude! That was awesome!" Geoff complimented the nine year old while raising him on his shoulders in victory.

Bridgette and Gwen reached up and appreciatively hugged Kyle.

"Thank you so much!" Bridgette thanked.

"You were so brave!" Gwen added.

"I salute you solder!" Chef saluted. "You can join my platoon any time!"

* * *

 **Kyle:** Wow! So that's what it's like to be treated as a hero! I must admit, even though I hate my Jersey heritage with a burning passion, that felt good!

* * *

"Dude! You and that accent equals AWESOMENESS!" Chris exclaimed excitedly. He had finally emerged from his trailer when he saw that the Snooki was locked in it's cage. "Stick with me kid! After this, you and your accent are going to go places!"

But rather than getting an equally excited response like he was hoping, he instead found the young boy starring at Chris with pure disgust and anger. The other campers and interns were glaring at the host too.

"What?!" he asked. "You're not upset because I locked you out, are you? Come on! You're all alright, aren't you?"

"No thanks to you," Chef grumbled and stomped away.

The South Park boys all just flipped the bird at the host and marched away after Chef.

"Ah, whatever," Chris mumbled. "But anyways, with the Snooki being caught, I guess that means that Cartman now has invincibility for tonight's elimination ceremony... thanks to Bridgette and Kyle here."

"Are you fucking kidding me?!" Kyle shouted, "I actually _prevented_ that fatass from getting kicked off?!"

"What?!" Bridgette snapped. "How could you _do_ that?! Cartman didn't even do anything to help in catching that thing!"

"True, true. But I didn't say that it had to be _who_ caught the animal. Just what animal had to be caught. And since you decided to help in the capture of Cartman's creature, then that means that Cartman will join the others in enjoying safety from the votes."

Bridgette just stared in disbelief at the host's announcement. As much as she hated to admit it, the host was right. But that didn't make it any easier for her to accept that fact.

"And I suggest that if you too want to enjoy that feeling of invulnerability that you get your butt back in the woods and try to locate your animal. You've got about... thirty minutes left."

Bridgette looked back at the woods. The thought of going back in there made her tremble.

"I... I... I can't," she shivered. "I don't think I can muster the courage to go back in there. Not after everything I've been through today."

"Well then, I guess you'll be facing the votes," Chris chuckled as he walked away.

Kyle stared at the host leaving in anger and disbelief. "I never thought I would hate someone as much as Cartman!" he stated angrily.

Bridgette sat down on a stump nearby and allowed her body to relax from all the stress she had just gone through. But it didn't help that much knowing she could be voted out.

"Hey bra. Don't worry about it," Geoff assured the surfer girl. "I can promise you that there's no way you'll be the one going home tonight."

"Yeah Bridgette. Geoff and I won't vote for you. Besides, Heather still hasn't caught her animal yet and knowing her, she can't do anything without any lackeys helping her so she's as good as gone," Gwen assured as well.

Bridgette breathed a sigh of relief. She hadn't known about the queen bee still being vulnerable. Knowing that she was still a potential choice for elimination made her feel much more secure about her position in the game.

But unfortunately, that security lasted a whole whooping three seconds.

"Hold still you cretin!" came a shrilling voice.

The three teens and Linus looked up to see the queen bee wrestling the rabbit in her arms trying to calm it down and maintain it's eagerness to put up a fight in hopes of escape. But Heather's will to win invincibility was far stronger as she held onto the rabbit with every ounce of strength she possessed.

Finally, after three minutes of struggling and wrestling with the raccoon, Heather managed to muster her way over to the cages and threw the rabbit into one of them and locked the cage door before it had time to react.

Heather took a minute to catch her breath before looking at the three teens sitting there and stated triumphantly that she was now safe.

"What was that you were saying about me needing someone to help me at all times?" she taunted before flicking her hair arrogantly and strutting back to the cabins to tend to her wounds.

* * *

 **Heather:** _(She is wrapping bandages around her arm)_ Well, this challenge certainly took it's toll on the human body. But all's well that ends well. I've ensured my spot in the next round of this contest! Now I can focus on setting my plan into motion!

 **Bridgette:** _(She appears somewhat distressed)_ Well, so much for that safety net.

* * *

Geoff and Gwen each put an arm around the distraught surfer girl as she sank to the ground in defeat.

But little did she know that from the edge of the woods, there was a certain fat boy staring at her. Cartman had no expression on his face as he just stared at her in silence.

' _After all I put her through, she still risked her neck to save me from that horrendous creature,'_ he thought to himself. _'But why would she do that? She could of sent me packing tonight easily.'_

Cartman just continued to stare at the blonde-haired surfer as a tear rolled down her cheek while trying to compose herself.

Then, without a word, the fat kid walked off into the woods.

* * *

"AYE YI YI YI!"

Izzy and the moose were still battling it out for supreme undisputed dominance over one another. Neither one showed any signs of wear or tear in spite of the many cuts and bruises the two now sustained.

Both Morty and Jack could only watch in both shock and amazement as to how dedicated the two combatants were to winning this duel. The samurai would almost admire the battle if he didn't know that he would be next.

Within seconds, a cloud of dust had surrounded the two brawlers and all the action was out of view. Only the sounds of the grunts and cries of battle could be heard.

Occasionally, the dust would settle and the duo could see glimpses of who had the upper hand in the battle. On one occasion, they saw the moose jumping up and down on Izzy before she broke free and another dust cloud surrounded the two. Ten seconds later, the dust cleared again and it was Izzy jumping up and down on the moose this time. But the moose bit her leg to escape and another dust cloud arose.

For what seemed like forever, the dust cloud had engulfed the monstrous moose and the crazy redhead. But after some time had passed, the two campers heard a thunderous blow be struck. Some dust broke off from the main cloud and was rapidly speeding towards a tree. When the dust dispersed, it was revealed that Izzy was stuck between the antlers of the moose, who was charging towards both Jack and Morty as fast as it could.

"No!" Izzy cried out. "Izzy cannot go down like this! She won't allow herself to!"

But alas, Izzy did go down like this. The moose charged directly into the tree, ramming Izzy against it in the process. But that wasn't the full extent of the moose's damage. The impact was strong enough to cause the base of the tree to snap just enough that it was falling down. All Morty could do was cry out in terror as the tree fell to the ground.

"AUGH!"

 _ **THUD**_

The fourteen year old opened his eyes. He felt okay other than being a little shaken up. That and the fact that his entire world was upside down. He tried to sit up, but found that he was unable to move. He looked up to where his feet were and found a distressing sight.

"Oh jeez!" he exclaimed. "My feet are tangled up in the tree!"

Sure enough, his feet had caught some vines that were in the tree and his feet were hopelessly tangled.

Unfortunately for him though, that was the least of his troubles. Morty suddenly heard that sound of heavy panting approaching him. He looked ahead once more and saw an upside down wrathful moose growling viciously at him. And at the hooves of the moose lay an unconscious Izzy. The last attack from the moose was enough to take her out of the fight.

The boy lost all color to his skin and frantically tried to pull himself free from the vines, but it was hopeless. They were entangled beyond his abilities.

"HELP! HELP! RICK! BRIDGETTE! GEOFF! EZEKIEL! ANYBODY!"

But alas, no one was around as far as Morty could see.

The moose grinned evilly as it slowly began to approach the trapped youth. This was going to be enjoyable for the mammal.

That is, it would have been enjoyable had it not underestimated the endurance of his previous opponent.

Without warning, Izzy's hands shot out and grabbed hold of the moose by it's back legs and caused it to lose it's footing and fall and hit it's chin on the ground stunning the creature.

Izzy then jumped to her feet and grabbed the moose by both of it's back legs while gritting her teeth angrily.

Oh no you don't!" she seethed. "No one, and Izzy means _no one_ , is going to deny me my sweet revenge! Especially not some crazy, psychotic, looney moose that tried to take Izzy out! THIS IS THE END FOR YOU!"

Then, mustering all of her strength, Izzy swung the moose over her head and slammed it to the ground three or four times to ensure the moose wouldn't try to attack again. Once she was certain that it was stunned beyond recovery, she swung the helpless creature over her head like a slingshot. Faster and faster the moose spun. Once it had reached maximum velocity, Izzy threw the moose as hard as she could. Within seconds, the vicious moose had rocketed towards the sky and disappeared out of sight with a light twinkle in the distance signaling that it was finally gone for good.

Morty just gazed in awe and wonder at the sheer strength he had witnessed from the red head.

* * *

 **Morty:** You know, they say you never know what kind of things you will witness or experience until you go out into the world and see them for yourself. (he shudders) If these are the kinds of things I have to look forward to when I grow up, I'd rather stay a kid.

* * *

"Whew. Thanks Izzy. You saved me," Morty thanked the red head.

But Izzy didn't respond to this. She just turned her attention to the boy tangled up in the vines and grinned evilly at him.

"Well, well," she snickered. "The samurai has escaped and you're still here. You _will_ tell Izzy where he went or else you'll receive his punishment instead."

Morty's smile disappeared instantaneously.

* * *

 _"Seven minutes to go campers!"_ Chris announced over the intercom. " _So far, the only four that haven't come back with their animals yet are Bridgette, Izzy, Jack, and Morty. If they don't catch their animals, they will face possible elimination tonight."_

Geoff, Gwen, DJ, The Eds, Courage, Stan, and Kyle were sitting with a still somewhat shaken Bridgette.

"Don't worry Bridgette. We won't vote for ya bra," Geoff assured her.

"Thanks," The surfer replied. "But that still won't matter. The way Heather and Cartman play this game, they'll be able to convince everyone else to vote for me and that'll be that."

"Come on Bridgette! No thinking like that!" DJ demanded. "You've got to say positive!"

"It's okay Beth," Bridgette assured her. "I know it's going to be me. Both Jack and Morty are much too likable and Izzy's bound to find her animal any moment now... why she hasn't yet is beyond me...God, listen to me. Sitting here moping and complaining. What would mom and dad say? I promised that I would win this contest and I'm just sitting here doing nothing."

"You lured a Snooki out of the woods all by yourself!" Stan reminded her. "I wouldn't call that nothing!"

"I know, I know. But unfortunately, that gave Cartman safety tonight... UGH! He does all this crap to us and what do I do? I protect him! Why didn't I just leave him to fend for himself?!"

"Cause that's not you Bridge," Geoff reminded her. "Cartman is the kind of dude that would leave someone behind to win money. You on the other hand see value in more than just money. You see value in friends, kindness, and humanity."

"Yes. It's what you call 'heart' and that is why everyone here would prefer you over Cartman any day," Double D stated.

"Here, here," Kyle agreed.

Bridgette took a deep breath. She still felt somewhat defeated, but hearing these words from two of her closest friends (and two children that seemed to have wisdom many years ahead of his time) did make her feel much better.

"Thanks you three. I guess it's true what they say: money doesn't buy happiness."

Geoff, Gwen, and DJ each put an arm around the surfer girl in support.

But just then, the ten of them heard a loud whimpering coming from the woods. They looked towards the said woods to see what was making such a horrendous sound.

To their surprise, they saw a bear. It looked somewhat beaten up and in pain as it was being pulled by it's ears towards the cages by...

"Cartman?"

Sure enough, the fat boy was silently leading the said bear to the cages by it's ears. He too looked somewhat beaten up, but he didn't show any signs of pain. He glanced over at Bridgette. Their eyes caught for a second, but Cartman had no emotion to his face. Bridgette, Stan, and Kyle on the other hand watched in shock as Cartman lead the bear over to one of the cages and opened it.

The bear, in one last attempt to avoid capture, roared a mighty roar in Cartman's face. The evil fat boy responded by slapping the bear across the face. The stunned creature rubbed it's cheek afterward. Cartman then snapped his finger and pointed to the cage again. The near hung it's head in defeat and sulked as it went into the cage. Cartman then closed the cage without a word.

" _And in a unique twist, Cartman has caught Bridgette's bear, thus giving her invincibility from the votes tonight!"_ Chris announced.

Bridgette just stared at Cartman in confusion as he walked away. He didn't look at her. He didn't say a word. He just walked away.

'But... but why?' Bridgette thought to herself.

* * *

Morty continued to struggle as he hang helplessly upside down in that tree. But his efforts were in vain. Izzy had him right where he wanted him.

"All right boy," Izzy sternly spoke. "Izzy is going to give you one final chance to come clean. Tell me where the samurai is and Izzy will spare you. If not, Izzy will torture you until you do tell her. So... what's it going to be?"

"I... I've already told you all I know Izzy! I've no idea where Jack could have went!"

Izzy glared at the boy. She then sighed in pity for her victim.

"Ugh, this is the only part of being Izzy that Izzy does not like. But alas, it must be done. The truth shall be unveiled."

The red head then began digging through her pockets, pulling out numerous tools that could be used as methods of torture. First was a machete. But Izzy decided she wanted Morty alive so she tossed it aside. The machine gun was deemed too messy. Her bow and arrow wouldn't be painful enough. Her bazooka didn't have any ammo at the time. Her anvil would squash Morty before he came clean.

* * *

 **Morty:** Aw jeez! Oh man! How does she carry all that stuff around in her skirt pockets?! An anvil! An _anvil_ for God's sake!

* * *

"Aha! Here it is!" Izzy exclaimed after digging around in her pocket for a minute. "Little boy, you'll regret the say you crossed Izzy."

Morty could only shudder in fear. What dastardly object was the unpredictable Izzy going to use on him?

Izzy pulled out her weapon of choice and held it mightily over her head.

Morty gasped.

"Oh, man, NO! Not that! _anything_ but that!"

"Sorry kid, but you've brought this on yourself!" Izzy reminded Morty as she held her weapon directly beneath his chin.

Morty's skin crawled. Even though he was only a middle schooler, he knew just as well as anyone that nothing on the face of the earth was a more inhumane weapon of torture than that of a single, light, fluffy feather. And here was an unstable teenage red-headed girl holding one right under his nose.

Izzy quickly yanked off one of Morty's shoes and sock. Before the boy could beg for mercy, Izzy began to stroke the feather across the foot of the helpless teen.

"Wait! Izzy! Ha ha ha! HA HA HA! NO! STOP! HA HA HA! PLEASE! HA! HA! HA! I BEG OF YOU! HA HA HA HA!"

"Ready to come clean yet?"

"HA! HA! HA! PLEASE! I HAVE NOTHING TO CONFESS! OH JEEZ! HA HA HA! HAVE MERCY!"

"Such a pity you're a slow learner boy," Izzy replied as she continued to tickle the helpless boy.

"IZZY! PLEASE! HA HA HA!" Tears were streaming down Morty's face as he squirmed helplessly to break free of Izzy's method of torture. But the more he struggled, the more tangled he became.

Izzy just continued to smirk evilly as she tickled her victim.

"HA! HA! HA! IZZY! I SWEAR! I DON'T KNOW WHERE JACK IS! PLEASE STOP! OH MAN! HO HO HO! HA HA HA! **AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"**

"Ooh, you're one tough cookie to crack. Fortunately, Izzy loves a good challenge."

"HA HA! NO! STOP! HA HA HA! IZZY! I BEG YOU! HA HA HA HA!"

Just then, a horn rang throughout the forest.

" _Attention campers! This challenge is over!"_ Chris announced. _"At the end of this challenge, every camper managed to capture his or her animal within the time limit except for Izzy, Jack, and Morty. So tonight, those three will be the **only** three up for elimination! You have three hours to make up your mind as to who you're going to vote for. I'll see you all at the elimination ceremony!"_

Izzy had stopped tickling Morty at this announcement. A look of shock had overcome her face. Then pure anger.

" **GAH!** Not again!" Izzy bellowed. "Izzy took too much time messing around with the samurai, this kid, and that moose! Why of all the rotten, no good, low-life, boot-licking, olive-eating, Justin Beiber-loving, Jersey Shore watching..."

"BAM!"

Izzy's eyes rolled in the back of her head as she fell face first onto the ground now unconscious.

"My most humble apologies my young friend," Jack bowed after knocking Izzy out with a chop to her neck, "I needed to end this conflict as swiftly as possible. But in doing so, I put you in danger. Please forgive me."

"I-it's okay, Jack," Morty assured, "You did what you had to do."

Jack then used his sword to cut the vines that were holding Morty up in the tree. Then, while hoisting Izzy upon his shoulder, Both Jack and Morty took the opportunity to go back to the campgrounds.

* * *

Three hours had passed and the contestants were at the campfire ceremony for the next elimination. Chris stood before them with a tray of ten marshmallows.

"The votes have been cast," Chris announced. 36 of you are here, but only 35 of you will receive marshmallows. I'll get the easy part out of the way first: The thirty-three of you that caught your animals today are exempted from the votes. That means Gwen, Lindsay, Double D, Bart, Kenny, Geoff, Leela, Fry, Stan, Kyle, Courage, DJ, Ezekiel, Harold, Cartman, Grim, Brian, Stewie, Ed, Eddy, Dib, Jude, Jen, Early, Shake, Meatwad, Bender, Rick, Bojack, Leshawna, Owen, Heather, and Bridgette are all safe."

Chris tossed a marshmallow to each of the names called. Some contestants like the Eds, Owen, Bridgette, and Geoff happily caught their sweet treats. Others like Cartman, Rick, Bender, Heather, and Gwen just caught theirs as if it were no big deal. Yet others like Lindsay, Bart, and a now revived Kenny just let their marshmallows fall to the ground. It was clear their hearts weren't that into it tonight.

"That leaves Izzy, Jack, and Morty. Only two of you will receive these last two marshmallows. The one that does not will leave this island via dock of shame and boat of losers. And you'll never come back... EVAH!"

Morty shivered as Chris emphasized that last word while Jack remained confident and steadfast. But Izzy just sat there quietly with her eyes closed and arms folded.

Rick didn't even looked concerned that his grandson might be eliminated as he looked at his watch impatiently.

"Missing something important? You've been looking at your watch every 30 seconds." Bojack asked in annoyance.

Rick just smirked at him, "Oh *burp* nothing."

"Anyways, the person who received the least amount of votes was...Morty!"

Morty breathed a sigh of relief as he caught his marshmallow.

"And then there were two. Now normally I would just announce who it is dramatically. But tonight, I want to do something a little different."

This caught everyone's attention.

"You see, after a day like this, I'm sure you all had some things you wanted to get off your chest in the confessional booth. Well, we the producers here at Total Drama Island thought that this would be the ideal opportunity to air some of your dirty laundry right now for all of you to see."

Everyone gasped in shock. Some in horror.

Chef pushed a television on a cart up to the campfire ceremony and hit the play button on a remote control.

* * *

 **Lindsay:** _(She appears somewhat depressed)_ I don't understand. Why were Barry and Keith so mean to one another today? This was supposed to be a fun challenge with friends and the ruined everything by acting so mean! I don't get it. _(She then gasps)_ Do you think it was the shark? Is catching a shark the same as winning a basketball game? _(She thinks for a moment)_ Yeah! That's gotta be it! Everyone likes to win at basketball! Okay! I'll just tell them that it's okay even if you lose a shark catching contest, the important thing is that everyone has fun! ...but how _is_ it possible to have fun catching a shark?

 _(A knock from the outside interrupts her)_

 **Heather:** Lindsay! Will you just hurry up and vote already?!

 **Lindsay:** Oh! Right! Sorry Hannah! Anyways, I guess I vote for Marty.

 **Heather:** Ugh! What a day! Those stupid losers! Think they can talk to me that way! Just you wait, I'll show them what it means to cross me! _(Takes a moment to compose herself)_ Anyways, I guess this is a good a chance as any: I vote for Jack. That guy's a lot better than we're giving him credit for and he could do some serious damage in this game.

 **Bridgette:** _(She looks a little upset)_ Ugh, this sucks! I have to choose between some really close friends. Morty's been like a little brother to me this entire contest. And Jack has contributed to the Killer Bass since day one. _(She pauses for a moment)_ On another note, why did Cartman help me today? It was a perfect chance for him to eliminate me and then he goes and saves me? I don't get it! Just what is he up to? Anyways, I guess I have to choose now. ( _She thinks for a minute. She then takes a long, deep breath)_ I'm sorry Izzy, but I vote for you. But only because I don't have much choice tonight.

 **Geoff:** Dudes! I'm telling you right now! Gwen is totally the coolest chick I have ever met! She's fun! She's sincere! She's tough! She's funny! Is this what they mean by beauty on the inside? If so, then I totally get it now! Gwen, is totally the hottest chick here! Gwen, I am so totally in love with you! WHOO! _(He pauses when he realizes how excited he is and calms himself down)_ Heh, sorry dudes. Guess I got carried away. Anyways, I guess I vote for Izzy. I can't vote for Morty or Jack. They're both good friends.

 **Gwen:** So, Izzy, Jack, or Morty huh? Well, I don't know the latter two that well, so I should be voting for them by those standards. But Izzy's just a freak. So... see ya Izzy. Anyway, Geoff is actually a pretty cool guy. Yeah sure, he may not be the smartest guy around but he's actually one of the most decent people on this whole island. I really do think this whole relationship can work out.

 **DJ:** Izzy's nuts, sorry girl.

 **Stan:** It's pretty much a no brainer. I vote for Izzy, that crazy bitch still gives me nightmares. Another thing, just what the hell is Cartman up to now?

 **Kyle:** Goddammit, I still can't believe I actually helped Cartman avoid elimination this time! Just what the hell is that fatass up to now? There's just no way he helped Bridgette today out of the goodness of his heart. He never had one to begin with! As for who I'm voting for...I'm going with Izzy. Frankly, I think we'd be a lot better off if that lunatic wasn't here terrifying the shit out of the rest of us 24/7.

 **Rick:** _(Drinking from his flask before burping)_ Nobody gets to torture Morty except me, so yeah, get the fuck out of here Hannibal's daughter.

 **Cartman:** Yeah, I saved the hippie's ass today. I know of the golden opportunity I let pass. Don't tell me I could of gotten rid of her just like that. I know that! But if you think I'm going to let it go down like that after what she did for me today, you've all got another goddamn thing coming! _(He pauses and calms himself down)_ Okay, I admit. Today was a pretty fucked up day for me after almost being raped by that... _(he shudders)_ But that hippie... she took that thing head on and saved me without a moment's hesitation. After all I did to her, she still saved me...why the fuck would she do that? She had the perfect chance to get rid of me and she passed it up just to protect me... I just don't fucking get it. Anyways, there's no way I'm going to be remembered as the contestant that got rid of someone after she did all the dirty work for me! No! _(He pounds his fist on the seat)_ The only way that dirty hippie slut will leave this game will be by my doing! No one else! Not even her own! I may hate hippies with every inch of my body... but I admit, after seeing what she did today... I respect her a little. _(He then points angrily at the camera)_ But don't you assholes tell her I said that! She and Kahl'll never let me live it down! But onto business at hand. I vote for Izzy. That psycho bitch should of been kicked out of here a long time ago.

* * *

The tension at that campfire ceremony was so thick, it could have been cut with a butter knife.

Elsewhere, Bridgette, Stan, Kyle, and Kenny were staring at Cartman. The fat boy didn't even want to look at her and his friends. He just kept his head turned away from her. Whether it was out of arrogance, pride, or shame, Bridgette couldn't tell.

Meanwhile, Geoff and Gwen were staring at one another. Both had grand smiles on their faces.

And Leshawna was smirking as Heather was covering her face with a piece of wood that was laying nearby the campfire sight.

"Heh, heh,"Chris snickered. "I guess that did the job all right. The ratings are going to soar after this episode airs."

Chris observed the scene, proud of the tension and drama he had just created. But there was still some business at hand.

"Hope you all enjoyed that juicy information I just released to you," he spoke with a smirk. "But in the end, It's a vote of thirty three to two in favor of eliminating Izzy. So Izzy, ADIOS!"

before Chef could take her to the Boat of Losers, a loud sound was heard.

 _ **HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONKKKKKKKK!**_

The rest looked surprised and startled as a medium sized boat came up to the Dock of Shame and 3 buff looking men with prods and a straight jacket came charging up.

One of those men came up to the host "Mr. McLean. Sorry to interrupt your show, but we are from the Burthlow Medical Asylum ."

every camper's eyes widened as Izzy stood up with a snarl.

"We received an anonymous tip that the daughter of two patients and a patient herself who escaped a few months back was here." The man said to the host.

Rick looked at his watch and smugly smiled, _'right on time.'_

"THERE SHE IS!" Another man said as he lunged at Izzy, but with a impressive flip, she landed on his head.

"AH! GET HER OFF!"

"YOU'LL NEVER GET ME ALIVE!"

Izzy ripped out the prod from one of the men's hands and shocked the man several times before rolling through the third one's legs and going to the boat.

"AFTER HER!"

"SHE"S HIJACKING OUR BOAT!"

Izzy easily hot-wired it and looked to the crowd of shocked campers, "SAMURAI JACK! OUR BATTLE IS FAR FROM OVER! ZEKEY, I LOVE YOU! EVERYONE ELSE, GOODBYE AND DON'T LET THE MIND CONTROLLING AGLETS GET YOU! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH"

With a cackle that would make even the Joker proud, she drove the boat into the night as the men stayed on the Dock.

The entire cast was thunderstruck as Double D gasped, "Good lord."

Brian blinked "Okay, I admit that was kinda badass."

"Kinda? Some of that stuff would put the army to shame dude." Jude stared wide eyed in shock.

Jack was just gaping, unbelieving that had just happened.

Ezekiel was still incredulous at Izzy's words, but inside was worried that she would be caught then she shook it off, no one could capture her.

Morty then pointed at Rick, "You told them didn't you?"

Rick shrugged, "I have no idea what you're talking about Morty."

"Really? Maybe you were just pissed she almost tickled your grandson to death?" Bojack questioned with a deadpan look.

Rick burped as he drank from his flask once more, "Well, that's all I guess. Goodnight, I'm gonna go take a shit before I hit the sack."

He walked off as Chris nodded, "Well, that was an interesting elimination. I'm going to bed."

The host walked off and the campers started to go back to the cabins for a well deserved rest.

* * *

"Now," Andrew said as he turned back to the screen once more, "We'll show you Bloo's video."

* * *

 _(On screen)_

"Hello everybody, my name is Blooregard Q. Kazoo or you can call me Bloo for short," the small blue blob greeted, "I'm Mac's imaginary friend and also best friend. But I'm better known as the best imaginary friend ever! I'm pretty much a total celebrity at Foster's and every friend there wants to be as cool as me."

"When I first heard about Total Drama," Bloo continued, "I wanted to sign up right away, it's a chance to show the whole world just how awesome I really am. Also, to win all of that moolah so I can finally buy the thing that I always wanted...an automatic paddle ball! So pick me Total Drama producers, you won't regret it!

* * *

 _(Control room)_

"That's all the audition tapes for now," Andrew said, "But there's still lots more to come. So until next time, this is Total Drama Island!"

* * *

 **Losers:** _Courtney, Zim, Noah, Eva, Sadie, Justin, Billy, Rusty, Trent, Cody, Beth, Wyatt, Katie, Homer, Ron, Frylock, Jonesy, Nikki, Tyler, Kim, Mandy, Caitlin, Duncan, Peter, Izzy_

 _ **AN: Happy belated anniversary! I'm sorry it took so long guys considering this is the longest chapter yet. But it was still a hard one to get done. But to be fair, this challenge really needed to end. I'll try to update sooner next time, but I make no promises.**_ _ **Sorry Izzy fans. But it was just her time to go. In fact, a lot of your favorite characters are going to be eliminated in the next few chapters, but that's just the way it is. There can only be two in the finale and only one winner at the end.**_


End file.
